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dobro p

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There's this pattern that crops up repeatedly in the Friends' Area. Somebody will ask for some help with a consultation, briefly describing the situation and their question and what the Yi gave them. Then people like Willowfox or me will offer an interpretation. Then, usually accidentally, the person will elaborate on the situation for some reason, and suddenly the whole contour of the situation is different because of the new information, which is often really crucial to understanding the situation. Which means a whole new interpretation.

So I'm thinking that it's really useful *not* to offer an interpretation as soon as they pop the question on this board. Or maybe offer a tentative reading, but fish for more information. In other words, take a kind of Hex 20 approach to things - watch, don't do. And hold off if you don't get that information. Or maybe it's a dance.
 

willowfox

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What would be very 'useful' if the people who wish to get their questions answered as clearly and correctly as is possible, please supply the full background details. Otherwise we are either left in the dark or try to guess what the question is all about.

" Or maybe it's a dance." The twist.
 

RindaR

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Giving full details can feel quite dicey for a querent, who might be wondering:
.....will X see my question, recognize the situation and think less of me?
.....what if the respondents are judgemental or put me down?
.....do I really want to make this public?

I like the idea of asking for more information when it's wanted, and knowing that the querent has a choice. I think there's a balance there that needs preservation. I also really like HIlary's request that querents contribute what they can to the site. I think this helps the community see itself as everyone being an important part of the whole. How could we practice our reading without questions to answer?
 

dobro p

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Yeah, what you both said.

I'm thinking that, for me at least, a stepwise approach might be useful. Offer a tentative or general reading based on what the questioner's given when they started the thread. Then fish for more information based on that, maybe concentrating on feeling questions and being generally supportive to encourage them to open up. In the past, I've smacked people upside the head on this board when I've thought they're asking really unskillful questions. It accomplishes a certain aim, but getting them to open up more certainly isn't part of it lol. Gentle and stepwise probably accomplishes a lot more in the long run, I'm thinking.
 

Trojina

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I'm not so keen on the idea, which seems to be growing that there are 'querants' and there are 'readers'. I think the best is that we are all both sometimes. I don't think of myself as either. I think the best of what we do here is teach and learn from each other. Yes some have much more experience and scholarly knowledge but I reckon sometimes even a complete novice has some good intuition to share.

I never came here because i wanted readings, never wanted anyone to tell me what was going to happen, just came to share ideas about what readings might mean.

Surely everyone who even posts a question is divining for themselves, they are learning, because after all they took the trouble to figure out a bit about the Yi to ask the question. They come here to get some help with a reading, to learn, surely not just to find out what to do next. (Hmm actually there seem to be alot of people who love being told exactly what to do next, depressing I think )

I can't see why querants should explain their situation, isn't is enough if someone just says what answer they got and a little of their query and then people give their various understanding of what it might mean - and all this is given to unfold the nascent understanding of the querant and everyone else at the same time.
 
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Trojina

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I see where I dffer from Dobro and Wfox is i don't see this place as a refuge for the troubled or a problem solving place or a therapy centre at all. If all these things happen as a result of what we do together thats excellent, but for me as i said above this is more about sharing/learning/teaching. Those who post querys as novices, well they aren't consumers asking for the 'finished product' of a reading - to me they are all students - we are all students.

Well i guess thats just how i see what this place is about and maybe its not, maybe its all changed, I dunno ....
 

RindaR

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Like Trojan, I think of querent and reader as roles that may be assumed by any of us as the spirit moves us. I also think that our expectations (in either role) are shaped by our life experience, our personalities, as well as our experiences with and knowledge of Yi.

Yeah... I think it's a dance.

Rinda
 

dobro p

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For me, this thread is starting to raise issues I hadn't intended and is starting to leave the direction I'd hoped for. What I'd hoped for was some feedback or impressions about how to give somebody a good reading. Like I said earlier, I often find that I give somebody a reading based on what they present, and then they offer more information about the situation in a later post which throws such a huge amount of light on the situation for me that I see a much more effective reading.

Like Rinda says (Rinda's smart) a lot of people don't offer up tons of information in an opening post, out of various uncertainties and shyness. I think that's inevitable, so it makes no sense my complaining about lack of enough information to give a good reading. That's why I'm talking about taking a stepwise approach - reading #1, followed by reading #2 if I get more information that sheds light on the situation.
 

luz

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I agree with Trojan and Rinda. Anybody can be the querent and the reader.
That being said, I think it does make a huge difference knowing the background of the situation. You don't get canned answers, no absolutes, you need to know background.

Now, how can you give a better reading? Listen (or, rather, read) carefully. Very often the querent is giving a lot of information and it gets overlooked, I've seen it happen. And very often the querent has many threads that give you an insight into their situation but you have to either remember that or take the trouble to look at the querent's profile.

Perfect example: Mercury's latest thread. Some of us answer to him based only on his post in that thread. The history behind is well documented in other threads and I can't imagine some of those interpretations would come up if the background information was considered.
 

dobro p

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lightangel said:
And very often the querent has many threads that give you an insight into their situation but you have to either remember that or take the trouble to look at the querent's profile.

Perfect example: Mercury's latest thread. Some of us answer to him based only on his post in that thread. The history behind is well documented in other threads and I can't imagine some of those interpretations would come up if the background information was considered.

Yes, you're right. And I don't do that, because I ignore as much as possible when I interpret for somebody because I don't want my interpretation influenced by anything external to the question and the information provided. (Which is why I'm so interested at this point in getting more information if I can.) But like you said, there's lots of valuable information in other threads from the same person. So if I want to read better, I'm going to have to do more homework. No more shooting from the hip. No more zen and the art of Yi reading.

But again, like I said, very often you get the querent providing more information later in the thread that really helps you understand what's going on better (and therefore you can give a better interpretation). For example, that Mercury thread you referred to. Mercury asked a question and I gave it a shot, and then later on after a couple of days, Mercury casually mentions that the person he wants to get together with is married! Duh. It would have made a big difference to how I'd read for him if I'd known that.
 
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bruce_g

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This prolly sounds trite, but I bleeb the effective order of accurate interpretations are:

1. know yourself
2. know the other
3. know the Yi

The problem is, with these forum readings we don't really don't get to understand the other. We don't get to ask probing questions so that we can have specific details to attach our interpretation to, as Dobro has already said.

I think this is where forum interpretors have to take a leap of faith. If we miss, it's probably due to our own projection into their reading. If we hit it, we're either just lucky or we connect on an intuitive level with the sitter. In many cases it's pretty hit-and-miss, imo.

What complicates this even further is, before an interpretor can develop the process of determining the sitter's/question's background, they've already received three other interpretations. Add to that disagreements among the interpretors, and chances are the querent goes away more confused than when they came.

Sometimes it's easy to see that a connection has been made between "the other" and the interpretor, and unless I radically disagree, I'll wait to see how it develops before adding my own pov to the thread. When the waves settle, then offering another pov may be helpful, without muddying the water for the querent. Not saying this is written in stone; there are of course exceptions to every rule, but I think it's effective more often than not.
 

Trojina

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Right now I'm getting a little :rolleyes: of seeing the pattern where querants (and many of them) post a thread on how to get someone back when they haven't seen or spoken to them for 10 years :rolleyes: oh and the persons married with 6 kids now (slight exageration) and they get readings and extensive attention, they say they've taken it all onboard, then the next day they post the same question again (from a slightly different angle) and this time different people answer (sometimes the same ones who have forgotten, lol) them maybe encouraging them to go ahead where the previous thread had (sensibly) told them to let go of it. I don't think theres much to do about it but its pretty farcical to witness, the only way around it is to check out how many threads they posted before on asking the same question I guess. Just ranting.

Hah oh yeah and when everyones wise to them and stops answering at all they just come back as someone else, lol, hehe but I recognise them from their problems.
 
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