Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
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33. Withdrawal
Line 3:
Attached withdrawal.
There is distress and danger.
Restraining subjugation and submissiveness brings good fortune.
Withdrawing from a person or situation one is attached to. This is painful and risky. By not trying to control each other, or acting submissive, things go well. Respect each other, while being yourself.
Line 4:
Preferred withdrawal.
For the noble one good fortune,
the ordinary person is obstructed.
Withdrawing, while preferring to do so. This is good for the one withdrawing, but frustrating for the other party.
Line 6:
Fertile withdrawal.
Without disadvantage.
Withdrawing creates a fertile situation. The withdrawal is not causing any problems.
Hexagram is changing to:
8. Associate
Associate.
Good fortune.
The primary oracle of the first day will always persist.
Without fault.
It is unsettling to have just arrived,
men who are late have misfortune.
Associating with someone. Things go well, this is not mistake. Be well on time, if you're late things won't go well. If you cast an oracle about the nature of this association on its first day, you will know what always will be the situation with this.
Thanks so much for this, Ginnie; Quite illuminating, and no, I had not known that 33 was also referred to as the seemingly contrary "Yielding".Line 33.3 goes best if we see ourselves as nurturing or furthering the other one. In other words, we would like to leave, but we realize that the other one is dependent on us.
Only someone who is exceptionally strong-willed can leave in 33.4. Because there is a strong attachment, most people would suffer if the tie is severed, even if we think it would be better to sever that tie. The one left behind would definitely suffer a lot.
Did you know that this hexagram is also sometimes called "Yielding," which seems to be the opposite to "Retreating." I think that is because we can also retreat inside ourselves without further ado ... and without one word being said. That is, we can become rather formal and distant without making a fuss about our reasons for being less available.
Thanks so very much for that. Extremely helpful and affirming. :bows:It seems to me that there's no question about your association with X being over; it's fully done (in a psychic sense) and there's no question about it having been a necessary split. At this point the difficulty of coming to a decision about it for you is past. Perhaps for that reason the I Ching is trying to tell you it doesn't matter very much whether you give X a full-disclosure e-mail about it, or not. Would telling X what you really think help alleviate some of your frustration? If so, perhaps it would be good for you to write that e-mail but not actually send it.
My general feeling about severing contact with troublesome people is that it's best not to open a channel for communication about why you are upset with them if you are not actually interested in making amends. Since fixing your relationship does not seem to be the thing to work towards in this situation, I would say it's best to let sleeping dogs lie and just keep your distance from X... Know for yourself why you have severed contact with X, but let X figure it out on his or her own. And yes, it does seem that 8 means X was late to the party in terms of figuring out his or her behavior and its ultimate effects.
Excellent observations. Thank you!How to break off contact with someone?
33.3.4.6 > 8
Hexagram 33 is "Retreat". Why not simply stop initiating communication? Why worry about what X can figure out? I never cut anyone off absolutely, and if civilly spoken to by anyone, I respond civilly, but I have relatives and neighbors who have wronged others and who will never get close to me again. They are not worth trusting. Line 3: if you break, break totally. Line 4: do it with good will. If you two shouldn't be together, it is best for both that you separate. Line 6: enjoy not having to put up with X further. Hexagram 8: seek those you can hold together with.
No, of course you have not.I am a bit thrown by this reading as it doesn't seem helpful as advice on how best to stop contact with this person, rather it seems to be predicting how it will go. 33.3 in particular is rubbish. I've had this casting when asking also how to get away from a connection with someone I felt helplessly emotionally attached to, and it sort of predicted a slow and sometimes retroactive retreat while still maintaining an illusion of not breaking away - if that makes any sense. It's almost as if you are forced to trick this person into thinking you still have a relationship so that in actuality you can get away with your sanity.
Sorry, hope I didn't muddle the waters and good luck.
How often have I looked back and said, "good god, I ought NEVER have allowed this horrid person in my life; now look at the mess they have caused me."
Thanks.:bows: Am trying in any case...Ha! I know that line well. But recently I've taken up this new strategy of trying to look positively on everything - as there is always something positive to be found. I've thought that line most often about my family, but I'm not sure how to learn from that experience. Maybe in my next life, I should choose my parents better? jokes aside, I hope whatever you do that you feel within yourself that you are doing the right thing ..for you.
Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).