35 to 14 / 43 to 17

[parasio]

Hello,
I'm not an English speaker. I'm German. First I asked for help at the aera "Divination discussion" under the topic "Relationship". There was nice people to help me. But now I discovered that the right place for personal readings is the "Friends' Area".
3 months ago I asked for a relationship, that now since 10 weeks is finished. The casted Hexagramm was 35, with the first 3 lines moving, to Hex 14. Gene suggested me that there might be misunderstandings to overcome. Today I asked the I Ching for guidance, what kind are the problems between my ex-boyfriend and me.

The result: Hex 43, the second and third line is moving => hex 17.

I'm really worried about the reading, because I understand that I'm in an ambigious situation (but I don't know why!). Will there be some hope to overcome this problems?

Thanks

Angelika

 

[learner]

Dear Angelika,

I would like to offer you some interpretation based on personal experience, when I had the same reading myself, also asking about a relationship.
Regarding the first, second and third changing lines of Hexagram 35 the key idea underlying the meaning is of progress obstructed. In the first line, the person is unable to express herself and to be understood. Therefore, whatever she does it is impossible to inspire confidence. In the second line, there is sorrow because the real contact with the other person is barred. In both lines, the advice is to be calm and to persevere correctly, without anger, because the situation will clear up, eventually. Finally, the third line describes a time when all are in accord and remorse disappears. That should be the auspicious outcome.
Regarding the Hexagram 43 ?Determination- it seems more complex. The hexagram suggests a moment of decision and the determination to succeed in doing something to release the tension. But there is also the admonition of danger. The second changing line talks about taking arms against the unexpected. The person must be attentive to what she can and to what she can not see. The advice here is: act with caution and reason must prevail over passion. The changing third line, describes a person who is determined to face the problem and to find a solution but it is a kind of solitary quest. That?s the reason why the line shows someone walking alone in the rain and being caught up. However, according to the interpretation, there is no blame, provided that the person acts sensibly ?not ?showing force in her face?. The message might be: stick at your principles and beliefs.
It seems to me that the ambiguity of the situation lies here, in this changing line.

If I may suggest you something, I would recommend another question to the I Ching, asking what you should do in this situation.

Hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Learner

 

[martin]

Hi Angelika,

I read 43 to 17 as: if you talk with your friend and go to the heart of the matter ("speak the truth" is one meaning of 43) then you will perhaps be able to bridge the differences (and the better situation of 17 would result).

I understood from your other posts that there are "cultural" differences between you and your friend.
Another friend who stays for a week in your house - that is probably difficult to accept with his background.
He might feel hurt and offended, he might feel that you don't want him anymore, he might feel ... I don't know what.
It's not a superficial thing for him.

Talking about this issue (and that is probably necessary, sooner or later) requires a lot of receptivity - and willingness to listen - on both sides. A "soft" approach: "It does not further to resort to arms."
It's not easy.

Hope this helps

 

[parasio]

Hi Learner, Hi Martin,

thank you so much for your help. For me it's very difficult to write and to put into words my ideas and feelings. Strangely exists no German forum for the I Ching, although Richard Wilhelm was a German speaker and C. G. Jung also. Since 15 years I ask the I Ching for guidance, sometime I use it every week, sometime I don't use it for years. But it was always very astonishing how it was speaking the truth. Particularly when I casted it for other persons and the question didn't concern me.

Angelika