Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).
kestrelw1ngs
visitor
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2021
- Messages
- 349
- Reaction score
- 204
well, i said i wouldn't be pestering the yi much after they gave me 20.6 - but this is more of a reflection.
tonight X opened up about her true feelings.
she admitted to earlier selfishness, not seeing value in me, getting caught up in fantasies of other people, but that after a few humbling experiences, that she has come to truly treasure our connection, and see that our relationship is one of the cornerstones of her life and a source of happiness, comfort and growth. she wants to care for and do better by me, and get her own finances and wellbeing in order.
the kindness and forgiveness came as quite a shock! (a former cast, 25.5.6> 51 when I asked Yi foolishly to see her next steps, suddenly makes sense). and exposed a lot of my hemming and hawing for what it is - mental confusion, judgment, shame, guilt leftover from our fights, my attachment issues, previous relationships.
i was frank, and told her while yes, we are not necessarily each other's "ideal" match, that could very well be a matter of fantasy distracting from something real and valuable.
hearing her sincere, honest feelings resolves many insecurities. i intend to take a retreat to sort my emotions/thoughts and let it all settle so i can follow my heart. i'd like to act out of love rather than self-preservation, insecurity, lust, or fear.
now her position is clear, the decision is really mine: to take a leap out into the unknown on the chance 'something better' awaits us both, or recommit to a newly stable situation where we can show each other an abundance of compassion and love in hard times. two different routes on the path, two different types of adventure.
i asked Yi: wow, what is your comment on all this?
either way, 40.1 is a beautiful answer. seems like mutual forgiveness, at least.
thank you to all who helped with previous interpretations! my situation has been so muddy and stuck, these forums have helped immensely.
tonight X opened up about her true feelings.
she admitted to earlier selfishness, not seeing value in me, getting caught up in fantasies of other people, but that after a few humbling experiences, that she has come to truly treasure our connection, and see that our relationship is one of the cornerstones of her life and a source of happiness, comfort and growth. she wants to care for and do better by me, and get her own finances and wellbeing in order.
the kindness and forgiveness came as quite a shock! (a former cast, 25.5.6> 51 when I asked Yi foolishly to see her next steps, suddenly makes sense). and exposed a lot of my hemming and hawing for what it is - mental confusion, judgment, shame, guilt leftover from our fights, my attachment issues, previous relationships.
i was frank, and told her while yes, we are not necessarily each other's "ideal" match, that could very well be a matter of fantasy distracting from something real and valuable.
hearing her sincere, honest feelings resolves many insecurities. i intend to take a retreat to sort my emotions/thoughts and let it all settle so i can follow my heart. i'd like to act out of love rather than self-preservation, insecurity, lust, or fear.
now her position is clear, the decision is really mine: to take a leap out into the unknown on the chance 'something better' awaits us both, or recommit to a newly stable situation where we can show each other an abundance of compassion and love in hard times. two different routes on the path, two different types of adventure.
i asked Yi: wow, what is your comment on all this?
either way, 40.1 is a beautiful answer. seems like mutual forgiveness, at least.
thank you to all who helped with previous interpretations! my situation has been so muddy and stuck, these forums have helped immensely.