Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).
Interesting point about you woke up this morning and things went round and round in your head, seems like an ideal hexagram to respond, as line 1 of 30 represents the early morning when the mind is fresh from sleep and is not tainted by daily thoughts. line 3 of hexagram 30 represent a attitude of self pity, fear and negativity. Life is passing quickly we are old before we know it. However you never age, you as a soul are only ever now, we are all now in the eternal universe. Line 5 and 6 represent your future in a sense that many now's from now, you will have a profound change of heart and this will bring you enlightenment. You will experience life in a more profound deeper way, perhaps the I ching will have helped you discover the truth.
Are you deluding yourself the fundamental question. What are therapist's, and psychologists, fantastic helpful dedicated people with a non supernatural limited outlook on the bigger picture. Work with the I ching, buy a copy of the oracle of Rama, Use these in conjunction with your therapist's. The self is the ego that always try to delude us,. The soul is the true you ,Eternal and everlasting.
For what reason would they betray you ? How would it benefit them ?
I've not yet looked at reading....I'm just asking why would they betray you ? What for ?
Do you think their case load may have something to do with responses/lack of them ?
You see the only reason for what seems to you like 'betrayal' I can think of is that even though you are suffering they have many others to see who they must also pay attention to who are in more danger. Resources are limited and they must cover everyone that comes to them. On the plus side I presume they feel you have reached a place of relative stability, for now ?
Betrayal is something that usually has an emotional payoff for the betrayer doesn't it ? Trying to think of examples....well a man betrays his wife so he can have sex with the babysitter.....a friend betrays another friend in order to fit in with the 'in crowd' and so on.
But what advantage could come to the therapist by betraying you ?
I'm thinking as it's an NHS therapist you can't choose how long to see them for and neither can they, can they ? I mean your therapist will have a boss and that boss will be wanting to know how many patients she is seeing and if she is getting through her case load and so on. I imagine as with most NHS staff that she is under pressure. I personally think that pressure on staff, of time, of resources, of money, is far more likely to be the cause of these circumstances than deliberate, ill willed, mean, betrayal.
I will look at the reading later though....but no personally I don't tend to think you have been betrayed for the above reasons. But I could be wrong of course
Well of course this is complicated. But basically one message to me, another to psychiatrist --which conflicted; a therapist who was the supervisor of my previous one and may have been motivated by guilt to take me on; she is also the bee's knees in the therapy block; mistakenly, she took me on for a quick fix and it did not work very well, but neither she nor anyone else will admit it; embarrassing incompetence of other professionals and very confused and inappropriate decisions - and all without my participation; of course the service will be being rationed - But if you knew the whole story you may get a clear picture. Of course you hear my narrative, but I know how I have experienced the entire kerfuffle and it has felt incredibly traumatic, disjointed, destructive, confusing, senseless, unjust. I am not of course psychotic...and my question was one way of approaching my question about the 'betrayal' because I still cannot make sense of things, and feel so terribly STUCK. I must add that I do not want to believe I have been betrayed, but whatever the so called evidence says, that is how I feel. Abandoned, dropped down a chasm, left in a nightmare that has gone on for months (as you know...) & unable so far to rise above it all.. And clearly Enlightenment is not with me....yet!
Back to the isolation or the depths, the impossibly unremitting drag of life. Must stop looking for assistance. Go back to schizoid living.. interspersed with the occasional lightness of being.....Oh God!
AM I DELUDING MYSELF?
30.1.3.5.6 > 45
No, you know exactly what you are doing. Endlessly beating your drum. Importuning works only for so long. Then they don't hear you. This time I left your query in shouters. You know you shouldn't use them. It turns people off, and then you get to shout louder. I was in a store and noise was coming through the walls. "Do you want me to speak to them," I asked the clearly annoyed clerk. She didn't say No, so I took it as a Yes. Next door was a store-front Holiness church. There were only two people in a large room -- the preacher and his deacon. With amplifiers blaring, the preacher would shout, and the deacon would shout back, making a continuous stream of noise. In a pause in the shouting I said, "They can hear you next door." "I know that," said the deacon. "God can hear you just as well at a lower volume," I said. "That's true," said the deacon. I left and in a few minutes they turned down the amplifiers. It may seem strange, but people can hear you and are more likely to respond if you speak softly.
(btw, no idea what Tom is trying to say in his post, but I do hope we can each make our point without distasteful comments about others' respective views)
Yes, thanks Trojan. It is just that that kind of thing is so unsatisfying for me. I try the 'ordinariness' thing which I have had some sense could be quite delightful, you know, the 'chop wood and carry water' thing but it has not yet clicked for me. I am by nature not very practical around the home and all that kind of thing feels so boring and so burdensome and without significance. An error in my character you might say? I am a bit fey,.
I'll go give the dog a bath.
I recognize the severity of NemeanMagik's problems but do not believe they can be solved by talk.
That is not quite accurate. I appreciate all the comments and advice but at the end of the day you cannot possibly know what is in my pot.
Hi NemeanMagik,
I feel genuinely sorry to see that we seem to be back to square one, don't we? You have now asked the Yi to give you an image of D towards you. I am assuming that D is a therapist.
In my view, the real question here is WHY you need to ask that. Why you need this validation so badly that your life revolves around this point. Why D has such a big representation in your life. What role you are transferring to D and why you have the need to do that.
A shame you didn't take my point about transference in a therapeutic process. Again, based on my personal experience, the more you pursue this avenue the further you will be from having your life back to you. :bows:
Well the truth is I have been stuck, and probably will be for a while yet, who knows? You may think I am a fool, and maybe I am, but I need a resolution in some way and I can neither find it within nor without.
"Please give me an image of D's attitude to me"? (The answer seems more to relate to me than to her, as you may see).
HEX 18.2.6 > 15 CORRUPTION/REMEDYING/REPAIR > INTEGRITY/MODESTY.
Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).