hexagram 48.2.3.4 to 45 What to do with my life?

[misswasabi]

Dear community,

Lately I've been feeling restless and wondering what to do with my life. It happens to me from time to time –specially in autumn, which feels like a second spring- when I have the feeling I still can make a change and find the way to live a truly fulfilling life.
My life is not that bad, but I’m aware that I make all my decisions out of fear, so I’ve chosen a very conservative life that doesn’t really fits me. I have a boring job, have a boring life in the city while I miss the mountains and the way the seasons change the landscapes. I’m trying to get pregnant without succeeding and have various physical problems that, to me, are probably all related to the way I’m living my life. A year ago I started studying something I hate in order to become a civil servant and have a permanent job. I thought that, if I could make it, that safety net would make me feel less fearful and I would be able to start pursuing what I really want (not sure what that is, either).
Sometimes I feel I should quit everything and move abroad. It’s not that by moving you’re leaving your fears behind, but that fact that you have to start from scratch in a totally different environment makes it easier to reinvent yourself. I guess.
I just can’t stand anymore my frustration; it’s not enough anymore to feel “secure” if I can’t see the value of the life I’m living. The problem is I have too many ideas, from moving abroad, to look for a house in the countryside with a friend of mine and sell things in flea markets, to keep on studying to become a civil servant or…whatever.
Before casting the coins for every one of my specific ideas, one by one, I decided to ask a more generic question, since the answer could have been something along the lines of “keep on doing what you’re doing because it’s not time to change anything”, and that would save me some time  . So I asked: “What direction should I give my life?”
And received: hexagram 48.2.3.4 to 45


The well may be referring to my potential, my resources. To the fact that my skills are always there, but they have become, somehow, unavailable, blocked, unreachable.

“You can transplant your center and change everything about your life, except for the source you draw on to sustain it all. You cannot own this source, nor carry it with you; whenever you move, you will need first of all to dig a new well to reach it.” That bit seems to refer to the options of moving abroad, as saying that it doesn’t really matter whether I move or not, since my fears will always be there. I also think it’s inviting me to so some introspection, since the source of my distress is linked to the lost connection I’ve got with my own intuition (that’s why I feel so lost and don’t even know what I want).


48.2 Lise says: “Even the best well can only stay clear if one looks after it. Even a rich mind or a splendid thought has to be developed and kept alive. But if you cannot drink the water, and there is no good jug, then enjoy the bass you can get. Make use of what a situation offers you, don't demand what is not there.” It certainly means I am neglecting my talents, but somehow it’s encouraging me to settle for what I’ve got.

48.3 “If something does not work, then look at it from all sides, think about it” So that could be related to the need of doing some introspection.

48.4 Never resign yourself to a low spirit, a depression, lack of inspiration, unhappiness. Do something about it! This line sure calls for action.

All in all, what I read is: Is not time to make a big change for the sake of it, but to pause, think, get inspired and put my life on track by reconnecting with my essence and my passions.

The resulting hexagram, 45 talks about gathering with people with similar interests. To be more sociable, since sometimes focusing so much in oneself is not the answer. But I don’t really know.

Does anyone have any further ideas for my reading? Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

 

[rosada]

I see 48. The Well as saying you have abilities that would be useful to 45. The Community, but before they can be useful you have to do several things to get The Well in working order. So from what you have told us here I think you are being encouraged to continue with your studies not just for the job security but because you will then have a skill to contribute and this will open up a larger world for you.

Meanwhile, you could take some of the bachflower remedy, Wild Oat which is for helping one find and recognize their true work.

 

[misswasabi]

Dear Rosada, thanks for replying; you’re spot on with your reading, as usual.
I didn’t know where to place that “gathering together” of 45, and what you said makes perfect sense to me.
In fact, if I’ve been considering studying those boring things, is because it could finally lead me to contribute to help people through my work.
It’s not that the job would be guaranteed since there are a lot of applicants, and if I didn’t pass, all the time would be kind of wasted.

Anyway. I cast the coins whether it was a good idea or not to keep on studying that and I got: Hexagram 21.

I always get puzzled with this one and never know whether it is auspicious or not. I read it as an invitation to make up my mind about it and, if I make the decision to do it, then do it and go to the core of it, but I’m not completely sure.

And then I asked which were my chances to succeed by choosing this path and got hexagram 24.1 to 2.

I’m finding hard to understand this reading too. Lise says: “Not from far returning. Without reverence or regret. Very auspicious.”
Maybe it’s saying that I would regret it if I don’t do it, since the perspective is auspicious. But I have to be convinced and “return” to the state in which I was convinced that was the way to go and study as hard as I did then. Or maybe that, by taking this path I will eventually do what I want to do (return to myself). But it sound auspicious anyway, right?

 

[rosada]

21. Biting Through advises getting into the issues. Sink your teeth in. So to know if continuing with your studies is a good idea perhaps you are being advised to dig deeper. Maybe by getting more into the actual course work - Get a study partner? Be more active in class discussions? - or by talking to a guidance counselor about alternative options or finding out if there are things you might do to enhance your chances for getting employment once you complete your degree.

 

[rosada]

What are the chances for success on this path?
24.1 Return from a short detour.
I think this is saying this path wont take you too far off course. Not exactly a wildly enthusiastic bit of encouragement, hunh? But still I think it's a positive. But then again my own bias is that it's better that you complete the training. Even if you never use it, having a degree, having the piece of paper, puts you head and shoulders above all the other applicants for what ever type of work you ultimately seek and with Saturn about to enter Capricorn next year there's a warning we're all going to be in positions where we have to start at square one. By having a degree your square one could be on the ground floor - not in the basement.

 

[misswasabi]

Thanks a lot, rosada. The thing is what I'm studying is not a degree (I already have a degree). I'm just studying law related stuff to become a civil servant. That's the way it works in my country: you study 100 subjects, do an exam, and if you have one of the best marks, you get the job; if you don't, you're left with nothing. And that's the bit that scares me: investing money, time and effort for nothing (maybe).
There is a friend who insist a lot in meeting up to study together. I'm gonna go with that, because this way I will have a clear vision of my level and my possibilities. Will see!