Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).
Hi everyone!
In this post that I've just updated I asked some questions about a relationship: https://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/fri...-13-uc-29-1-6-61-60-2-5-24-and-40-2-16.33625/
Since the questions I've posted were answered, I thought I should open a new post for the other casts I've done today. The casts are just about the current situation so I think it's not important to know what's behind.
This guy with whom I've had a rollercoaster "relationship" disappeared on february and contacted me again in the past three weeks. He liked some of my posts on facebook and wrote me at night to ask how I was doing and telling me he thought about me. I didn't really like the way he did it. It was really meaningless to me and made me think he was just feeling so lonely he thought he could give it a try.
Anyways, I answered. In a cold but polite way.
Then some nights ago he reappeared asking how I was doing and telling me he often thought about me. As before, I was cold but polite, and he went on saying he was feeling the connection between us and thinking of our thougts together. He was probabily trying to make sexting. I told him that probabily our connection wasn't enough since nothing ever truly happened between us and we split apart. I told he had been important to me, that I loved him (meant in a friendly way, not that I was in love) and I was happy he was doing ok.
He answered in a way that made me feel bad. He told me he was sorry he couldn't give me what I wanted from me and more time, but something was missing when he saw me..... That he just sees me in his shadows but he's far more than that... bla bla...
I thougt.. Ok, then why the hell did you always contact me day and night for months???????? Why did you told me you missed me and never felt that way before????
I couldn't answer immediately, but after some days I wrote him. I really needed to get rid of those famous pebbles in you shoe. I simply told him he didn't have to feel gulty for not giving me time or what I wanted from him.. That I didn't really want something from him. And then I opened up about my own fears (I have issues with my attachement style). About how I too settled in this situation because in this way I didn't really have to get involved. I told him about my fear of feelings. Nothing new since I already told him.
I sent him a long message because I needed closure and to tell how I felt. No reproaches, no grudges, just my feelings. I also told him I felt free living this "limited relationship" but I too have some other sides of me and feeling relegated to one, at a certain point started to feel trapping. And then, as he told me, I told him that something too was missing for me. I said that closing this situation was liberating in a certain way for me and that I hoped for the future that I'll overcome my fears. I also told him that maybe we could be friends.
When he answered I couldn't believe my eyes... He told he doesn't want my friendship since I answered just to settle the score with him and that my message was squalid. He also told me he is seeing another girl with whom he's really happy (............ there really was no need and also.... Really? Then why are you still writing me?). He then unfriend me on facebook and canceled my phone number or directly blocked me.
I answered again, trying to make him understand my point of view. That I just opened up about my fears and told him I felt something missing too, but this doesn't mean he wasn't important to me or that I wasn't sincere with him. That I'm sorry if I hurt him with my message, but that wasn't my intention. I just needed clarification.
I don't think he's going to answer. Maybe he won't even read my message, but I wanted to close things whitout feeling gulty of something I didn't mean to do in the first place.
I reread my message a tons of times and I don't see revenge or cruelty. Just explanation. Since it's really easy to feel gulty for me, I've asked Yi, 1 if really I was mean sending that message? 54.1.5.6>6
Also, 2 will he read my message? 14.4.6>11
Could it mean I have to find peace, because it doesn't really matters if he reads or not because he's not worth my attention?
3 Will there be an evolution from this situation? 55.5> 49
I think it could mean yes.. But I don't understand if it means he could contact me again (hope he doesn't. He's toxic) or that I'm having my own revolution
4 Was is right for me to close this situation? 27.3>22
This lines tells just that I separated from a nourishment that wasn't really fulfilling, so i guess I made the right decision.
I'm so confused right now so I don't completely understand these casts.
Thanks in advance to everyone who's going to help me understand!
In this post that I've just updated I asked some questions about a relationship: https://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/fri...-13-uc-29-1-6-61-60-2-5-24-and-40-2-16.33625/
Since the questions I've posted were answered, I thought I should open a new post for the other casts I've done today. The casts are just about the current situation so I think it's not important to know what's behind.
This guy with whom I've had a rollercoaster "relationship" disappeared on february and contacted me again in the past three weeks. He liked some of my posts on facebook and wrote me at night to ask how I was doing and telling me he thought about me. I didn't really like the way he did it. It was really meaningless to me and made me think he was just feeling so lonely he thought he could give it a try.
Anyways, I answered. In a cold but polite way.
Then some nights ago he reappeared asking how I was doing and telling me he often thought about me. As before, I was cold but polite, and he went on saying he was feeling the connection between us and thinking of our thougts together. He was probabily trying to make sexting. I told him that probabily our connection wasn't enough since nothing ever truly happened between us and we split apart. I told he had been important to me, that I loved him (meant in a friendly way, not that I was in love) and I was happy he was doing ok.
He answered in a way that made me feel bad. He told me he was sorry he couldn't give me what I wanted from me and more time, but something was missing when he saw me..... That he just sees me in his shadows but he's far more than that... bla bla...
I thougt.. Ok, then why the hell did you always contact me day and night for months???????? Why did you told me you missed me and never felt that way before????
I couldn't answer immediately, but after some days I wrote him. I really needed to get rid of those famous pebbles in you shoe. I simply told him he didn't have to feel gulty for not giving me time or what I wanted from him.. That I didn't really want something from him. And then I opened up about my own fears (I have issues with my attachement style). About how I too settled in this situation because in this way I didn't really have to get involved. I told him about my fear of feelings. Nothing new since I already told him.
I sent him a long message because I needed closure and to tell how I felt. No reproaches, no grudges, just my feelings. I also told him I felt free living this "limited relationship" but I too have some other sides of me and feeling relegated to one, at a certain point started to feel trapping. And then, as he told me, I told him that something too was missing for me. I said that closing this situation was liberating in a certain way for me and that I hoped for the future that I'll overcome my fears. I also told him that maybe we could be friends.
When he answered I couldn't believe my eyes... He told he doesn't want my friendship since I answered just to settle the score with him and that my message was squalid. He also told me he is seeing another girl with whom he's really happy (............ there really was no need and also.... Really? Then why are you still writing me?). He then unfriend me on facebook and canceled my phone number or directly blocked me.
I answered again, trying to make him understand my point of view. That I just opened up about my fears and told him I felt something missing too, but this doesn't mean he wasn't important to me or that I wasn't sincere with him. That I'm sorry if I hurt him with my message, but that wasn't my intention. I just needed clarification.
I don't think he's going to answer. Maybe he won't even read my message, but I wanted to close things whitout feeling gulty of something I didn't mean to do in the first place.
I reread my message a tons of times and I don't see revenge or cruelty. Just explanation. Since it's really easy to feel gulty for me, I've asked Yi, 1 if really I was mean sending that message? 54.1.5.6>6
Also, 2 will he read my message? 14.4.6>11
Could it mean I have to find peace, because it doesn't really matters if he reads or not because he's not worth my attention?
3 Will there be an evolution from this situation? 55.5> 49
I think it could mean yes.. But I don't understand if it means he could contact me again (hope he doesn't. He's toxic) or that I'm having my own revolution
4 Was is right for me to close this situation? 27.3>22
This lines tells just that I separated from a nourishment that wasn't really fulfilling, so i guess I made the right decision.
I'm so confused right now so I don't completely understand these casts.
Thanks in advance to everyone who's going to help me understand!