11,4,6>14

[Mayorka]

As I am getting older and older I worry that I won't be able to be a mother (35+). Of course it is something that is happening around us, not all the women are mothers and it can be their choice or not. I don't belong in this category, I want even one child but If this won't happen I can accept it. I want to know....

Iching please tell me I won't be able to be a mother during the rest of my life?
11,4,6>14

If I had only line 4 with resulting hexagram 34 I would say this is very promising but line 6 doesn't like me at all. The last line of hex11 peace is over, the union of earth and heaven is over. However, we have hexagram 14 at the end. So I am a little bit cofused. I would appreciate any help!

 

[Amaterasu]

I think 11.4 says you can have a child if you let it happen naturally and don’t try too hard. I think line 6 is saying that, yes, your fertility will begin to decline soon, so it might make things harder (but not necessarily impossible) if you wait too much longer.

It’s harder for me to comment further, as I do not know the exact circumstances of your life (whether you have a partner, etc). That said, plenty of women can get pregnant into their early 40s, and the idea of 35 as a cutoff is sort of an illusion created by statistics. That is, many women who haven’t managed to get pregnant by 35 have had underlying fertility issues to begin with. So if you weren’t infertile in your 20s and early 30s, you should still be able to get pregnant in your late 30s, although it might take more time because your hormones are starting to fluctuate and some of your ova are not as viable.

I personally had my first and only child at 36, and even “accidentally” got pregnant at 41 (although I miscarried). So don’t hold onto that magic 35 number too hard!

 

[Trojina]

As I am getting older and older I worry that I won't be able to be a mother (35+). Of course it is something that is happening around us, not all the women are mothers and it can be their choice or not. I don't belong in this category, I want even one child but If this won't happen I can accept it. I want to know....

Iching please tell me I won't be able to be a mother during the rest of my life?
11,4,6>14

If I had only line 4 with resulting hexagram 34 I would say this is very promising but line 6 doesn't like me at all. The last line of hex11 peace is over, the union of earth and heaven is over. However, we have hexagram 14 at the end. So I am a little bit cofused. I would appreciate any help!

Well I think the answer may be saying if you want a baby you are going to need to go and get one. I'm getting that from line 4 with all it's uncertainties and fluttering and prevarications. Your fertility is very finite as you know, it's a physical capacity that will end with no going back hence it is no use waiting for the right time/right situation/right person and all that just find a way to get pregnant.

I'm not just saying this from the reading, I also think, as a post menopausal woman, looking back, if you want a child and you're getting older go and get one, because time does run out. So yes you might meet the perfect man and be in the perfect house when you're 48 but you probably won't be able to conceive then, or it is just a bit old to conceive if you think ahead small kids are a lot of work in your 50s.

I don't think line 6 is bad here, it may say 'well whatever issues you think there are against having a baby they aren't there, go and conceive'. In line 6 one is ready to defend an old order of things where the old order has in fact gone. I agree this could be saying that this desire you have is out of date but I think line 4 offsets that somewhat. Yes at 35 you're beginning to be pushing the bounds a bit hence your question but you still have some fertile years left. I think the 14 is saying that, that you have the gift of fertility and of course 11 is life, the flow of life. In line 4 one is almost dithering 'shall I/shan't I' and like a little bird afraid to leave the nest he needs a little push.

Now I know there are all kinds of things to take into account if just deciding you want a child regardless of coupledom/money etc. You'd have to be prepared for all the struggles being a single parent brings and so on. But I have known of women who decided they wanted a baby and went ahead and had one regardless and it seemed to work out. The thing is if you really want a baby you can't afford to just wait until circumstances look right.

If you decide you need circumstances to be right I completely get that, it's just as an older woman looking back, even though I didn't especially want children, I can see now how finite and precious that little time gap that are fertile years looks from this end and I'd say now if you want it do it.


I do also think the reading suggests being proactive. Don't ask me how you'd go about it but that's my thoughts about the reading.


BTW I don't mind if you think it's a really stupid idea I just thought I'd throw it out as a possibility if your desire for a baby is very strong.

 

[Trojina]

Artificial insemination with a male friend who also wants a baby...things like that.

I knew a woman who had 2 children, different fathers, because she wanted them. The fathers weren't much use in parenting terms and didn't stay around but she had a close male friend who played a big part in their growing up. I always thought that was brave, and it was hard work, not something that really appealed to me I think it would have killed me, but she knew what she wanted and went for it.

 

[Willem D]

Hi Mayorka,

Because I don't know the background to your question, I will only look at the trigrams of the answer that was given to you.

Hex. 11 is composed of inner/lower trigram Heaven (Qian) and the upper/outer trigram Earth (Kun).
You are represented by Heaven and 'wanting to be a mother' by Earth.

The trigram Heaven is balanced, no moving lines. Heaven stand for the creative power, creation, structure (of mind, but also body and life), law, etc. As said before the inner/lower trigram is about you, so trigram Heaven represents your creative power, your creation, etc.

Trigram Earth is rather unbalanced because of 2 moving lines (4 and 6 in the composed hexagram).
A balanced trigram Earth stands for receptivity, nurturing power, unstructured potential, receiving, accepting, etc. In an unbalanced trigram everything becomes too much, excessive.
Unbalanced Earth stands for passive, lethargic, too submissive or too nurturing towards others/something without considering your own needs.

The unbalanced trigram Earth is balanced with trigram Fire (Li) (Upper trigram hex. 14). Fire stands for clarity, clear vision, clear discernment, differentiation.
The moving lines 4 and 6 give an indication where to look for in trigram Earth.
- Line 4 is the line for decision, finding your road, judging and choices and common sense
- Line 6 is the line for spiritual wisdom and mental processes.

Ok long story, hopefully not to boring, but let's wrap it up.
(Whispers) I believe the Yi is giving you a little kick in the butt .....
It seems to say, make up your mind, what do you want? There is nothing wrong with you (in a physical sense) but you need to decide what you want and act accordingly

Good luck and I hope this will help you!

 

[diamanda]

Iching please tell me I won't be able to be a mother during the rest of my life?
11.4.6 > 14
Flutter flutter in your neighbourhood, put effort and activity into becoming pregnant.
11.6 is not a good line, but it might be referring to the man not sticking around with you.
In any case, if you really desire to get pregnant you need to get active about it, you need to pursue it, it won't happen via good luck.

 

[Mayorka]

I am so grateful for your answers, thank you. I got the message: I should act if I really want it and pursue it.
There is no partner in my life at the moment... Well, I have some time left to get pregnant.