12.1.2.5>38

[mythos]

Today, I asked if there's anything I should know for my romantic relationships.

My friend pointed out that I've been feeling it out for a long time' and I realized Im ready to be more engaged. I was using a failed relationship of a year agoto learn llessons so have been lightly dating but this last week I feel active and like I've learned the lesson.

So, this reading looks great obviously lol

12, say no to wrong people. So, that makes sense. I want to date right people and I'm coming from 38 (a previously avoidant personality) so I have no strategy save having this better idea of me and then an "I'll just be receptive, be kindly honest and gently feel my way in communicating interest."

Line 1: Wing: If it is not possible to change or influence the current environment while preserving the principles that have formed your character, then withdraw completely. Success will come to you in a more profound sense than could be realized from a compromising situation. Important associates may leave with you. Good fortune."

I was holding this last failed relationship as a lesson and extracted as much as i could to improve myself. Along the way, Ibecame a much more real human and met many people. For the first time in a long time my conversations are light and substantial. Perhaps the line alludes to this.

Line 2: Legge: Patience and obedience are proper for the inferior man in all circumstances. The subject of the second line is a great man, and occupies the place in the center -- if, when confronted by difficulties he cherishes the attributes of patience and obedience, he will soon have a happy issue out of the distress

Perhaps this is to say, the feeling it all through and the process has been very useful.

Line 5: Wing: A sweeping change for the better is indicated. Things can improve and progress. Yet this is the very time to feel cautious and reserved. With such an attitude your success is doubly insured and a strong foundation is established for the new times.

Well, as I am setting forth now, with my lessons, i am aware of my own past. So, I am very cautious, ensuring I don't hide, that I communicate and I follow whatevers best and nourishes me

Thoughts?

 

[ginnie]

The context or background is 38, feeling like an outsider. The 12 as primary hexagram is cautiously optimistic. 12.5 is the best line here and suggests a sort of respite time when troubles go away and relaxation sets in. I think we need to bring some lightness of heart to romantic relationships for them to get off the ground. Being too heavy just bogs everybody down . . . Best wishes to you!

 

[sooo]

12 is a form of expansion or decompression, which in a sense puts the object in opposition to other objects. There's a time for it, such as when the universe expands. Gravity draws objects together. It's a question of which is stronger at a given time, in a way similar to breathing. Nothing remains still other than for a brief time between the two movements.

 

[mythos]

Well, when it comes to monogamous, long term, emotionally intimate romance ginnie, I'm cautiously optimistic lol.

There are a few issues. One is that I'm excellent at 'feeling things out'. I can meet men for 6 months, years, having great conversation, discussing relationships, ideals, philosophy, poetry...with no idea, however much I'm attracted to them, how to kiss them.

...And then on the flip side, if I'm physically intimate with someone, I'm pretty much totally clueless how to communicate with them. I feel like some sort of robot being forced to emote while breaking down. Cue: Heavy intensity, melodrama that resembles love addiction but really is just to make as much noise as possible so to be left alone.

Sort of like you say sooo, the object is me in opposition to other objects. And the purpose of 38 is how to get over that.

At the base of it I enjoy the single life, meeting anyone I like, moving at my rhythm with no one I have to answer to and kissing when I feel the right time...I sort of wonder how it's possible to enjoy life as much as I do, in a relationship.

People talk about getting a relationship like buying a house. But a relationship is with a whole other person. I mean, that's quite intense, really. This idea of being with just this one person, and sharing a home and... all those things couples do that make a relationship so great??

I mean, first I might have to figure out how to communicate with a person I kiss or kiss a person with whom I communicate. I like the idea of starting with the kiss and seeing if I can communicate. But that might be a copout.

What do you think?

Oh, those mulberry bushes... I'm tied to them!!

Well, I suppose I couldn't have a more apt read. Any other thoughts? Like, maybe motivation on why a relationship is such a great thing

 

[sooo]

Sort of like you say sooo, the object is me in opposition to other objects. And the purpose of 38 is how to get over that.

What do you think?

I think the purpose of 38 is to establish a firm direction or position for yourself. But if you are divided within yourself on the matter of the value of a relationship, than 12 separates the direction into opposites. That appears to be your current position, based on what I've read.

I can offer my present position on forming a serious relationship and my reasons for that position, but I can't say what anyone else should do regarding developing a relationship. Individuality is an important element of 38.

I can ask the question, do you sense your universe expanding or gravitating, pushing away or attracting?

 

[mythos]

Well, I've been pretty committed to having one while I was dissolving the 'block' of information the last one had given me. But now that's all gone, all dissolved.

I attract. But in the way I describe. So, I have all these beautiful and delicate, ongoing relationships, where I meet with men and we have dinner and conversations. I've learned, over time, who wouldn't work, because, for example, I'm messy and they're very neat.

But then, there's one I like a little, and that's alarming.

On the other side I kissed another man I barely know for ages and that's interesting but I have no idea what to say to him. Partly because I'm leaving the country for a few weeks.

I think I wonder if I just keep going, meeting people, but then I could do that for the rest of my days and I DO want a relationship with the right person. I'm not sure what a healthy relationship with the right person feels or looks like.

I'm not actually divided at all in what I want, I'm not sure how I cross the bridges... Maybe delicately, day by day? The advice is mulberry bushes suggesting I have something of what I need but a lot more faith.

I can see why I need those mulberry bushes. Last night's post was the avoidant cop out who can rationalise way too easily. Final verdict: I'd like have a nourishing and awesome relationship.

 

[sooo]

Good! A rhetorical question then: Can you roughly describe the kind of person you'd like a relationship with? That would make a good mulberry bush to tie to.

 

[mythos]

Ah, hello sooo, yes, I believe that I can. An excellent idea. Thank you.

 

[mythos]

The mulberry bushes? Being truthful, listening and affirmations I'm keeping on - These mulberry bushes are wonderful. Thank you mulberry bushes!