20.3 to 53 on relationship advice...

[Pyramid]

Hello everyone,

Been a while So I have this question:

To explain the current stand, after a long journey for us, from being colleagues, to sort of friends, and sometimes even frenemies, with him sending mixed signals all the time, I blocked all the communication channels except for work. He still tries to sneak into a closer zone, but indeed, I have decided to keep it the way it is now.
I clearly know what I want with X, a romantic relationship, if any. What is the best course of attitude?
Got 20.3 changing to 53.

Anyone wants to interpret ?
Cheers and thanks

 

[loverofknowledge]

You've blocked all channels of communication, yet you wish to have a romantic relationship? Is that correct?
Your reading reflects this combination of desire for romantic partnership (53) and a stand-still (20.3). The best attitude is to look into yourself 20.3 and to correct your own behavior, if necessary, so that you know whether to advance or retreat, accordingly.

 

[Blue Eagle]

I see 20.3 as an invitation to (re)connect to your Self, your deeper intention, through self-examination and contemplation. What do I really want here and is that aligned with my/our highest good? Is being with him something your life needs right now? Your deeper intention for yourself and what you want on the surface (a romantic relationship with him) may not be aligned ...
Maybe that is something you'll learn step-by-step (hex 53, gradual progress).

good luck

 

[Pyramid]

Thank you for both nice interpretations... I think I owe you a rephrasing: after this time we have known and communicated with each other, I have decided to be responsive to only one kind of approach from him (the one that exactly never has happened) namely a direct romantic approach. So I was thinking what kind of attitude might show him (implictly) that this is my only communication channel with him from now on (of course the part that he accepts this or not is not up to me )..

 

[diamanda]

The line shows the need to recognise your actions and their consequences.
As you said, your attitude/actions so far didn't have the results you wanted.

So I believe you're doing the best to change your attitude into a completely new one.
Fingers crossed he'll prove to want the same that you do!

 

[Sixth Relative]

Let me see if I got this right: you asked the best way to achieve a romantic relationship with this man.

If that's correct, if that was the meaning of your divination, I'd read 20zhi53 as a wake-up call to honestly examinate were you stand and drop delusions. The answer is not a good sign for your, although the result is uncertain at this time.

 

[Pyramid]

Well from where I stand I interpreted it like this:
Stop (as I do) and contemplate on what you observe to know where to go (or how to be).
Sounded like a vague recipe to me though and thus I asked the group Your answers (except for you Sixth Relative) more are in the way to tell me I should correct something behavorial from my side...so I cast again for advice and I got hexagram 2 unchanching.
Does that help us further?

Cheers,

 

[Sixth Relative]

Hex 2
I like Ricardo Andree's take on this one:
What you see is what there is, whether you like it or not is another matter. Is better to adapt yourself and "follow" the reality in front of you than to try to impose your own ideas.

Hope that would help.

 

[Pyramid]

I also like this quote, but it s not showing me any course of action. That's what I need in reality for a day to day communication. So let me disagree with you Sixth Relative in following.

 

[Lana73123]

Any updates to this situation, Pyramid?

I just asked a relationship question (a follow up question) and also got 20.3 > 53. My original question was "what attitude should I have towards D so that he starts to care for me" and I got 51.1.5 (shock) > 45 (gathering together). I've tried a few things that I thought would "shock" him - to seemingly no avail. SO then I asked today "show me how to "Shock" D and I got 20.3 > 53.

Seems like the interpretations here are of you examining and possible altering your behavior. I was reading on divination.com about Hex 20 and I kinda like what it said - my interpretation was we have to understand what's going on around us - with the natural cycle of things/where we are placed in the universe. Sometimes we move too swiftly and expect things keep up or be obvious. But this hexagram is about realizing your place in the movement of the universe. Observing/contemplating/then comes the understanding of who we are/where we are. It ends with "This is a time to see and be seen." which I thought was curious. it makes me think we are like pieces of art. up for everyone to see and judge. someone may buy us and take us home and love us. Others may not get us at all and walk on by. And all we can do is be what we are and feel the power in that. because we hold all the power in the situation. Because we are already perfect, already a work of art.

 

[diamanda]

Line 20.3 says "observing my life, advance retreat".
For sure our own actions are in question here and we need to look carefully at how we have acted.
The way we have acted has brought about the current steadily evolving situation (53).

It's a bit like the saying "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results".
So we need to think back - how did it start, how did it start going wrong? has this happened before?
And pinpoint the exact actions that caused the issue.

It doesn't have anything to do with how perfect we are or not - it's a matter of action and reaction.
If we do want a different reaction from another person, this answer shows that it can be done via questioning and radically changing our attitude.
And there's the factor of time also - how long did it take for the current situation to take such good hold? Obviously things which have taken a certain way cannot be easily and quickly changed.

 

[maggie may]

I have decided to be responsive to only one kind of approach from him (the one that exactly never has happened) namely a direct romantic approach. So I was thinking what kind of attitude might show him (implictly) that this is my only communication channel with him from now on

As others have mentioned your words and intentions do not seem to fit together. Here you say you will be responsive to an approach you have never gotten. I am not quite sure what you want him to do, but if he has never done it, I am even less sure why you have expectations that he will do it. Saying a 'direct romantic approach' can mean many different things to people. Maybe his idea of that is different from yours. I am also not clear why you want to show him with an attitude what your expectations are for communication. Why not simply tell him? That would sure be the most 'implicit method.

I like to use the method of putting the shoe on the other foot, so to speak. Suppose he had blocked all lines of communication with you except the way that you had never used. Would you then think that he wanted a romantic relationship with you?

It can feel challenging to talk to another about our boundaries and expectations in regards to relationships. But I see H20 as asking you to approach with an open and receptive attitude (inner trigram of earth) and look at the details and work over the long term with subtle movements and a gentle breeze (wind trigram outer). Consider your boundaries and expectations carefully in regards to relationships so that you can express them clearly.

Blessings.

 

[Pyramid]

Any updates to this situation, Pyramid?

I just asked a relationship question (a follow up question) and also got 20.3 > 53. My original question was "what attitude should I have towards D so that he starts to care for me" and I got 51.1.5 (shock) > 45 (gathering together). I've tried a few things that I thought would "shock" him - to seemingly no avail. SO then I asked today "show me how to "Shock" D and I got 20.3 > 53.

Seems like the interpretations here are of you examining and possible altering your behavior. I was reading on divination.com about Hex 20 and I kinda like what it said - my interpretation was we have to understand what's going on around us - with the natural cycle of things/where we are placed in the universe. Sometimes we move too swiftly and expect things keep up or be obvious. But this hexagram is about realizing your place in the movement of the universe. Observing/contemplating/then comes the understanding of who we are/where we are. It ends with "This is a time to see and be seen." which I thought was curious. it makes me think we are like pieces of art. up for everyone to see and judge. someone may buy us and take us home and love us. Others may not get us at all and walk on by. And all we can do is be what we are and feel the power in that. because we hold all the power in the situation. Because we are already perfect, already a work of art.

Dear lorna23,

Sorry that I reply after eternity! I just saw that this thread has been growing after I totally forgot about it, until today which I googled the casting and saw my name
So I am giving you the update now, hope it still helps...
This relationship ended completely a while after this post, now I remember vaguely what the exact order of events was, but I slowly started to 'undo' the communication and since there came also geographic separation, in the end all fell into place.
Well I see clearly that all the interpretations I got were somewhat out of place. So I tried to remember things and look into James DeKorne's interpretation of the 3rd line. It suddenly came to me as it was:
Stop, contemplate the (long i.e. 53ish) way you have come so far. Recede or proceed gradually (still 53).
That's what is happened because that's what I did

Cheers,
P.

 

[Pyramid]

P.S : time to check my other forgotten threads !

 

[Lettuce]

i know this is an old thread but just for other peoples reference i have always seen it play out as someone deciding to retreat “observing my life, advance, retreat). Something started, the person in question contemplated what they want and decides to retreat and progress elsewhere