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23.1<27 a new chance?

dragona

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Hello :bows:
I wasn`t going to post more on this issue, but I got really offended by this man`s overreacting over something that could have been done with more tact (initially he tried to be nice, but flipped into an angry rant and that is what happens when we use chats).
I was sick at the time, so angry messages felt especially thoughtless from somebody who is supposed to have feelings for me. He kept asking " why I have to push him":confused: and got upset over something I wrote while ago he just sow.Then suggested a talk, but I said that I am too offended. I was not going to ASK for an apology, it should have came naturally and then perhaps I would offer one. Instead, I got only silence.:mmf:

For this whole situation, I desperately need clarification. I have my limits. I was not told what exactly he returned back for and since we keep contact from far, I was not going to jump with heavy questions the first time we talked face to face. My bad.

I just asked what will giving a new chance to this bring me? 23.1<27
I read it as need to get down to the essentials here, but I cannot do anything but wait.
I am also very rigid with my feelings, I feel they have to be in straight line, not very elastic-like, cannot help it. Am I to be awakened to the cold reality of being played for almost a year now?
Asked what will he do? hex 53 unchanged - that looked good and steady...stubborn?:cool:
Why didn`t he contact me? hex 41.2,5<42
What is the reality of the situation and where it`s going? hex 36.2 <11

I feel so lame asking so many about this situation, feels like I have formed a habit.
Are there any good news left to hear, I wonder... :cloud:
 

pocossin

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What will giving a new chance to this bring me?
23.1 > 27


Your presentation is full of grief, Dragona, I'm sorry to say. At this time and in this emotional atmosphere your guy isn't going to give you the kind of commitment you need, so break with the old way (23) and try something new. Line 1 recommends that you do not persevere in the present course. Change the tone of the relationship by sending him some humor or art. Remind him of the good times you two have had, and maybe you will get some nourishment.
 

ijing0509

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What will he do?
53 unchanged

It means he will do it step by step.

Why didn't he contact me? 41>42

Because someone suggests that he had better not contact you for the moment. Also, he is unable to disobey the suggestion. It is good for both of you.

What is the reality of the situation and where it's going? 36>11

The situation is that both of you are injured like the sun in the dark. However, if you know how to use the healthy part, it will go to a very sweet situation.
 

dragona

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Thank you both for helping me. :hugs:
I`m surprised with your interpretations, expected much gloomier scenarios.
Woke up this morning feeling less angry, but not less hurt.
I can get along with almost everybody, but here I don`t JUST want to get along...avoiding discussing what has hapened in the past in order to be able to move foreward does not bode well with me. Having that discussion does not have to be very pleasant, but still, avoiding it only brings missunderstandings.:brickwall:

I am unable to get to my artworks at the time, I did want to send and make something, as I always do. :) But I need the good flow, damn it. Too bruised atm, Yi did say that too much limitations will bring misfortune.
He has nothing to feel hurt about...I simply dared to say hello through the chat, wanted just to say something and instead gotten warnings and insults and was put in my place. That I will not forget easily. :mad:

Anyway, could you just help me understand lines 3 and 4 in hex 5 (waiting for nourishment) as I just asked how should I act now?
I find it contradictory because of strongly suggested waiting in hexagram 5 while line 3 says it is a bad position and line 4 LiSe interprets as clear need to get out of it.
Thank you again, d. :bows:
 

pocossin

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Anyway, could you just help me understand lines 3 and 4 in hex 5 (waiting for nourishment) as I just asked how should I act now?
Hexagram 5 imo concerns the posting of troops to border regions where they are on guard against hostile forces. Applied to your situation, it suggests that you should be on guard against the spirits of negativity that attack the relationship. The enemy arrives in line 3, and you are 'in the mud'. Injured: line 4. You are advised to get out of the pit -- make a manoever that redefines the situation. Line 5: waiting at meat and drink -- take psychological provisions that will strenghten you to fight off hostility.
 

ijing0509

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5>58

5 means to wait. Since you are unable to wait, you need to talk. 58 means to talk happily. If you talk to him happily and sincerely, everything will go well.
 

anemos

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I was sick at the time, so angry messages felt especially thoughtless from somebody who is supposed to have feelings for me.

I just asked what will giving a new chance to this bring me? 23.1<27
[/U]

I feel so lame asking so many about this situation, feels like I have formed a habit.
Are there any good news left to hear, I wonder... :cloud:
I have experienced the same thing in many occasion with a certain individual. I had a extremely difficult day and I was also sick to due to a medicine when a misunderstanding occurred. it was my fault because I didn't have the clarity of the mind to understand something i was told. I apologized and I ask to further discuss it the next day because i knew I wasn't able to make any productive conversation. I was hoping to hear a respond such as " ok, we will tall tomorrow" but that didn't happened.

This reading makes me think about my interpretation of that situation , as well as yours. Maybe , what that person wanted for you at that time was nourishment. That what you were going through at this specific moment should be less important of his concern and his need to discuss it at that specific moment.

In my case, that person had every right to be upset. I was wrong and I needed to be clear that I had full responsibility for the misunderstanding. So, I gave that wrong nourishment.

This day was a nightmare to me. I had to cope with two very difficult personal things and on the other had I should be cheerful because of some visitors and also in alert to take care of some situation between a family member and one of the visitors. in the midst of all those things that incident with that friend happened and I thought I shouldn't make him feel "neglected" or that I didn't care when asking to discuss it the day after.

The next day my head was full of white hair. I looked at the mirror and asked myself " what the hell Am I doing ??????"

Hex 27 is about helpful as well as unhelpful nourishment. it asks to ponder on the nourishment you give or receive. What is healthy and what is junk food.

A junk meal might satisfy ones hunger but is that real nourishment ?

Best
M
 

dragona

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Hex 5 can also be and it IS about patience, so perhaps I am told to be patient and totaly change my wiew of the situation (in his favour?) - as bradford depicts 5.4 as a deep pit one has dug himself in, made of missconceptions...and since I still cannot do that, I am told to be patient. I dont feel very keen on saying anything atm, so better wait for more clarity.
Anemos, I am aware that this is about overreacting on both sides but it is happening just because we don`t ACTUALLY LISTEN to each other (in this case, I simply frogot he hates chatting so much because it has been a while but really)....I would not make a big deal out of this just so, except that I really am loosing my respect for this situation. But to dig such an deep pit, one needs to get some help or at least be provided with very good tools.
Tom, I did not get line 5.5 chanining, in case you thought so.
 
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dragona

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Hello my PH (Personal Helpers):bows:
it really does make the difference to return to this readings after a while, especially if things have not moved much.
I have been having this very uncommon hex 16 feeling, following me all the way (as YI suggested, just not feeling positive as I expected)... so enraged, jumpy, sad...just being out of place.
I don`t like to think that it has to do only with one man, rather the combination of things with his large contribution through the power I careleslly allowed him to have over me. Things people do out of the (seemingly) right reasons...:bag:
I am feeling stuck in my 16-ness and looks like it is up to me to create that big 49 turn and it feels unfair. So no wonder I got 45.5 into 16 for asking wether this situation can get resolved well for both of us...
LiSe says that things should be let to fall into their own place naturally,
9 at 5: Gathering has ranks. Without fault. Not true. Great ever-flowing determination. Regrets go away.
When things get out of kilter, then it is best to let them all find their own best fit back again. No use to impose an order, the order has to come fromout the organism itself. Then a strong organic whole will grow again.

while I have seen other suggestions that I need to approach.:confused: I hate to do it, fearing it may suggest I am too linient.
Nine in the fifth place means:
If in gathering together one has position,
This brings no blame.
If there are some who are not yet sincerely in the work,
Sublime and enduring perseverance is needed.
Then remorse disappears.
When people spontaneously gather around a man, it is only a good. It gives him a certain influence that can be altogether useful.. But of course there is also the possibility that many may gather around him not because of a feeling of confidence but merely because of his influential position. This is certainly to be regretted. The only means of dealing with such people is to gain their confidence through steadfastness an intensified, unswerving devotion to duty. In this way secret mistrust will gradually be overcome, and there will be no occasion for regret
. Wilhelm

I realy need to loose this anger but in an satisfactory way...any suggestions?
Wondered of differencies in wiew, asked what is his idea of future relation with me - hex 45 unchanged.

Also got a few repeated hex 57 but those deserve a new post :wrydemon:
 
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hopex

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Dear Dragona - 5 to me is a waiting happily in food and drink.

Maybe it is time to bury your dead and create what you want

loosening anger and assuaging frustrated communication needs -
is remedied by private journalling/and or writing carthartic letters
you do not send. However avoid misrepresenting and confide to
an unbiased party
 

dragona

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Are you refering to 45.5? this sounds like 5.5...I am tired of having angry monologues in my head and letters are often nice, measured. And when face to face we loose courage to dispute.
 

hopex

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I was just commenting on 5 which I always take to
mean wait in happiness and comfort:bows:
 

dragona

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I wish...on a diet currently also, trying...my stomach disagrees as does my heart
 

pocossin

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I wish...on a diet currently also, trying...my stomach disagrees as does my heart
A continuation of 23.1 > 27. I have been able to the lose the weight I gained over Christmas -- very important for me -- by stopping having bread routinely with meals. Not much pain in that.
 

dragona

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...and I was just feeling the need to say "Hi, Tom":hug:
well, i am stressed and not watching my intake at all...sitting inside, not excercising, not sleeping regularily...denying bred alone won`t help. :D
this will take time in my case but this diet usually brings results tho feeling loved and cared for would decrease my choco/sugar intake..sad storry, I know :blush:

Interesting enough, I got thanking note for some comment I made but silence still on the front wich is his los, cos I am not mad today :mischief:
 

ginnie

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For this whole situation, I desperately need clarification. we keep contact from far ... What is the reality of the situation and where it`s going? hex 36.2 <11[/U]...
He never really understood on a deep level that you are really not feeling well. This is a problem of long-distance communication ... He couldn't SEE you, nor hear your voice ...

His words hurt you at a time when you were feeling sensitive. I think the idea of 36.2 is to tend to yourself,not try to mend this relationship from afar. It's so easy for misunderstandings to creep in. It's probably better to let time pass.

For my post-holiday diet, I am not eating cheese or anything that has cheese in it. Greek yogurt is okay, though.
 
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dragona

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Hmh, if I say I am too offended and don`t care to talk, stay silent for over 2 weeks as total opposite from trying to communicate a lot before - that should tell that I am angry as hell. Not recieving any peace offering or apology of any kind puts me in quite impossible spot - absolute validation and clarification or disdain.
One should not allow oneself angry rants whenever without having an ability to apologize sencerily. Kissing my feel would also be acceptable in this situation. I am very generous person :mischief:
 

dragona

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whahahah:rofl::rofl::rofl:
pure tease, considering I am on a diet (hmph) and ketchup is all sugar and I am a veggie but he is a Dragon, and this is his year..uneven, I tell you...
oh, and they are all about being theatrical like and burn you with fire of their words and want to be in a spotlight all of the time wich makes me yawn and poor water dawn all of the time (my speciality:D)
 

ginnie

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:rofl:
What does Yi tell us about having fights with people stronger than ourselves?

I also have someone in my life right now who I think should apologize and admit how badly she hurt me, but so far she has not made any move in that direction. :rant: Drat it! :rant: Guess I'll have to put my ego on a high shelf and forget about ever receiving an apology. I can forgive her. But since she really did hurt me and won't say anything about that ... won't acknowledge what happened, well, I am not required to look upon her still as being a close friend of mine. And the reason is: I don't trust her anymore. She let me down. I think the best thing I can do is forgive her and let her go -- and not get fooled into thinking she is still a close friend of mine.
 

dragona

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I am just very surprised at my own reactions towards that person and the whole situation.
If circumstances were any different (easier), I would have kissed this acquitance goodbye months ago.
Not too late to do it now still but in that case I want to get to spew some fire also. I used to be like you, all noble and taking the higher road like, but that is likely to give me an ulcer and tho I am very patient with people, they abbuse it most of the time.
In this situation, the more time passes, more bitter I get - it should be hm..crunchy
 

ginnie

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23.1 > 27

The 27 in 23.1> 27 advises moderation in speech ... not chewing him to pieces.

You say you must vent your emotions or you'll end up with an ulcer. But this situation sounds more like you want a symbolic victory, that is, to have the last word. A symbolic victory is an empty victory, hot air only.

Why not do something physical that gets the angry feelings out of your body without hurting anybody -- also not hurting you -- ?
:)
 

dragona

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You are right, I need some sort of validation of my feelings, I resent that :hide: after messing things up over again - I only get more angry and it lingers on for days.
Because of my present life situation, I really needed things to be ok between us; that friendship was sustaining me in much needed cheerful state and I think it is a gift when one gets a chance to make another feel better, especially if it came offered and accepted as seemingly whished for in the first place.
I am thinking of sending everything back and just delete all traces of his presence in my life. I pospond extreme actions forever because there is no going back afterwards for me...liniency comes with age in my case but it did not pay off so far.
I finally asked Yi will I get to have "my day in court"? and got 42.1,2<59
To me this reads as validating and positive response.

Unchanged hex 9 came for asking if there is something I did not ask or understand about this whole situation. The word that stuck from explanations is petiness :brickwall:

The things is ginnie, that we cannot change who we are....if someone does something hurtful to you and goes unpunished or reprehanded in some way, they are bound to do it again...and acting on guard like all of the time is not my cup of tea...we are friends (more or less close) or we are strangers - it is something like that for me. :bows:
 

lavalamp

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In personal/love relationships, unless actual physical or similar abuse is involved, I do not think it helps anything to "punish" someone when the relationship breaks down. In my experience one always ends up regretting it later, wishing you could take the words back.
 

ginnie

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leniency comes with age in my case but it did not pay off so far.
I finally asked Yi will I get to have "my day in court"? and got 42.1,2<59
Seems there is money involved, so that changes things. He owes you a lot of money, doesn't he?
 

dragona

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In personal/love relationships, unless actual physical or similar abuse is involved, I do not think it helps anything to "punish" someone when the relationship breaks down. In my experience one always ends up regretting it later, wishing you could take the words back.
I did not want to get off as an bigot or a mean person, it is just my experiance that if you say nothing to an offence other will think that is ok and act the same - was refering to ginnie`s experiance mostly.
I resent being handled and put in my supposed place without discussing anything and further more, makes me sad that my feelings are not being recognised.

Not very advisable, I know but I just asked what is his opinion of the situation= 56.2>50I think he doesn`t even get it...he is the Wonderer here indeed, wanting to change his country and his life for the happier one, thinking he has made a bond here but he needs to hold it together, keep for himself for the time beeing...at least that is what I have been told in a scatchy way only...a bit more honesty would have taken him so far...
 
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dragona

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Seems there is money involved, so that changes things. He owes you a lot of money, doesn't he?
Oh no, I meant that figuratively - will I get a good moment to express my wiew on things...
money is my problem alone, but not in that way.
 

dragona

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Hi all, still struggling with this....bad weather outside so nothing to do but dwell upon things...:cool:
seems like it s not a good idea to send everything back and delete simbolicaly (28 unchanged)...and I got readings saying that small things can be done, slow slow slow...
Along those upper casts I also got 13.4<37 for the destiny of our connection and just today 4.3<18 for asking if this is the man i need in my life in a long run:eek:
Now, these 2 casts ask for deep consideration, I feel but Mercury is returning to my sign and no wonder today I really neeed to connect back as in 13.4
Nine in the fourth place means:
He climbs up on his wall; he cannot attack.
Good fortune.
Here the reconciliation that follows quarrel mover nearer. It is true that there are still dividing walls on which we stand confronting one another. But the difficulties are too great. We get into straits, and this brings us to our senses. We cannot fight, and therein lies our good fortune.

but what becomes of it Yi never would give clearily, mostly hex 3 and slow approach wich I would understand as it is not defined but this I cannot really get clearily, other then literaly, but I don`t think myself as that case...perhaps he does?:bag:
Six in the third place means:
Take not a maiden who. When she sees a man of bronze,
Loses possession of herself.
Nothing furthers.
A weak, inexperienced man, struggling to rise, easily loses his own individuality when he slavishly imitates a strong personality of higher station. He is like a girl throwing herself away when she meets a strong man. Such a servile approach should not be encouraged, because it is bad both for the youth and the teacher. A girl owes it to her dignity to wait until she is wooed. In both cases it is undignified to offer oneself, and no good comes of accepting such an offer.

http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?t=3257&page=5 more on 4.3...
having trouble putting together these last two casts, other then reconciliation and backing off which is no fun at all...:mad:
..accepting each other for what we are, not who we want other to be?
 
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