Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).
2. What can I do so that our relationship succeeds and moves forward?
Answer Hexl 49.2.5 -> 34
3. What can you tell me about the future of our relationship?
Answer: Hex 58.2.3 -> 49
To add a little to what Mirian said, line 49.5 says that you know, even without asking the I Ching, what to do to move forward successfully. Just go ahead and do it!
The two moving lines represent two different alternatives. 58.2 is a sincere sort of pleasing and that is good. But 58.3 is a forced kind of pleasing, and that brings misfortune.
I think you should continue to try to open the lines of communication so that you can get good feedback on your sincere efforts to improve this relationship. It sounds like there are a lot of bad habits to overcome! Best wishes!
Overall we have been very compatible, very close, and very happy together. That is, except for some serious character flaws of mine that have been gradually pushing him away. I have been very jealous, possessive, critical, judgmental, moody. And what he tells me upsets him the most is not my selfish demands but rather the way I approach him.
I suppose I should stop wasting the opportunity I have by worrying. I should start changing, starting by how I see this situation. I shouldn't see it so negatively. After all, I didn't get hex 18 or hex 41 (or is 42 decrease) or hex 54...
Oops, I guess I was just too anxious that I messed up
Though 58.2 and 58.3 kind of scare me... Of course my intentions are pure. But I am not sure when I am forcing it and when I am withdrawing too much or what is in between. I have always been too intense and although this situation calls me to stop, it's difficult, especially considering my nerves regarding the situation.
3. What can you tell me about the future of our relationship?
Answer: Hex 58.2.3 -> 49
This one scares me. In my last relationship I got 49 right before everything turned really bad. Before the love died (then I started getting hex 18 and the hex that indicates another woman). Does this mean that our relationship will turn dry? Or could the change be positive? Or does can it mean that it depends on HOW things change? This answer is the hardest one for me to read.
That is, except for some serious character flaws of mine
Walk to a mirror, look into your own eyes in the mirror, and say these words to yourself: "I love you!"
You are quite a worrier and I think you might benefit from taking the Bach Flower Remedy called Aspen. The Bach Flower Remedies are available in some health food stores . . .
You see, your first priority has got to be your own nervous disposition. You must come up with ways to stop criticizing yourself and always 'taking your own temperature.' It's like you are always putting your fingers to your own pulse to see if your heart is still beating! You are in a state of anxiety and that has got to be your main priority: calming down.
Chamomile tea, taking warm baths, long walks in nature . . . books have been written about this, the ways to soothe the hyperactive nervous system . . .
Give your own emotional intelligence a bit of credit. If you have pushed him away it is because part of your soul wants to push him away because that is what you need. Even all the other 'flaws' you mention will have some truth for you. All of your own feelings, however dark and unwelcome will hold a truth for you, they are yours. It isn't only sweet feelings that count or that need to be heard. He is no saint....whoever he is, and you can't help things best by aiming to disown your own nature and feelings. Of course self examination and self reflection are worthy pursuits....it's just you sound like you don't even believe your feelings have a right to be there. I think a person should always hear their own feelings, notice them, however horrible they are. But don't disown or condemn them because they are valuable...always. Even jealousy and possessiveness. Because they are your truth you cannot just banish them or feel you 'shouldn't' feel this things.
What if how you feel and what you are right now is exactly the right and only place for you to be right now, 'flaws' and all. Why even call them 'flaws' you aren't like a broken pot, you are a human being contending with the pain of growing or not, as we all are.
wait I've found more self loathing
Give yourself as break ! ....Geez...
Have you ever thought of trying EFT..I might find a link somewhere. You can do simple tapping on your forehead for example whilst saying things like 'even though I am anxious I am still moving forward' it can help to reassure yourself that despite struggling with dark feelings, and it is a struggle when they come, you still are doing well, as best you can, and so on.
What was the question...I'll go check. I haven't read the whole thread so I may be repeating what others said
I myself have had 58.3 when I have had expectations of developments that were not very real or helpful. You have 58.2 so keep on communicating in the NOW and don't imagine you can know what this might become. 49 needs it's own time to happen.
Here is a link, with freebies, to someone who I think can give simple EFT techniques that might help with being in the now, forgiving oneself, accepting oneself and so on http://clairephayes.com/
You asked about your relationship yet it is the relationship with yourself that has seemed to come to the fore in this thread....and this thread has attracted some great responses already
I think that you might learn not to blame yourself or other people for their flaws and faults, since everybody has them. We do not need to focus on what's wrong with ourselves or other people. That is just a habit and you can get out of it. A good healthy person disregards flaws and faults and just gets on with their life . . . warts and all.
When you notice that someone is wrong or you see a flaw in yourself, learn to smile silently.
2. What can I do so that our relationship succeeds and moves forward?
Answer Hex 49.2.5 -> 34
Hi Cathalina,
The core of your readings is the answer to the question asked right at the beginning.
Hexagram 49: revolution, molting, skinning, metamorphosis, it is all about change. Not an easy thing to do at all and that is why you are sort of going round in circles, recognising what you call your "faults", listing behaviour/attitude patterns that you don't like in yourself, but finding it very difficult to change things around. And this is not another fault for you to blame yourself. It is just because with this hexagram we are talking about a lot of transformation.
If I were in your position, these are the aspects that I would consider:
- Mental/intellectual change: work on the way you think, on a conscious level. Try to analyse things from a different perspective. Read books, go to seminars, discuss on forums. Stop your thinking process going on the same route again and again.
- Spiritual change: work on meditation, beliefs, let your spiritual being be touched by some sort of spiritual healing.
- Psychological change: Be kind to yourself and give yourself time. All changes need time to process, some of them are already happening, but are still on unconscious level, they need time to surface.
- Life style change: Take on something new. Change your diet. Start a hobby. Start a new physical activity (something you have never done before).
In my view, this is all embodied in line 5 of Hexagram 49. That is the line that you got, which (good news!) has all good prospects of success.
Hope it helps :bows:
Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom
Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).