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lafragolina

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Hello all-
Back again with an answer I am trying to understand, and need some help from the outside.
My question is about how I am supposed to behave at this specific point of a situation, in order to reach G's innermost feelings. After casting the coins I got a 50 with a changing line in the 5th position, that turns it into a 44. Any help or advice on this is so very welcome!
Thanx all,
La Fragolina
 

hilary

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Hello Elisabetta, how are you?

I think this reading is about finding a sympathetic way to manage the change both you and G are experiencing. The Vessel is solid and strong, and it contains things as they transform. Accepting the symbol of the Vessel means holding your feelings and his, the whole relationship, as it develops. It suggests finding what is stable, offering G something he can rely on for continuity.

The ancient Chinese used the Vessel for sacrifices - by changing the nature of what they cooked in it, they kept the channels of communication to the spirits open. For them this meant it could represent founding a new dynasty, resting secure on this flow of communication. For you, I should think it represents a new way of being in the relationship - and like the Chinese dynasty, it has to be founded on deep communication in order to last.

Hm - this describes the ideal you are looking for, but I imagine what you want to know is how to attain it, no? The Commentary offers a strong hint - this is also about nourishing your own perceptiveness. You can hold the relationship and become acutely sensitive to its subtle inner changes. In other words, see and hear him. It?s less a matter of reaching his feelings, more of finding ways to let him know they are all heard.

Another insight from ancient China - before the new dynasty can be founded, the old one has to be completely overthrown. The old patterns, that haven?t brought about the results you wanted, have to go - then you can ?grasp renewal?. The Vessel represents a positive connection to what is really worth having from past and future - but it also relies on you getting rid of whatever is no longer useful.

So it could be that the process of reaching G, renewing the relationship, starts with your own inner work to make your own foundation new and firm. The Vessel is also an opportunity to ponder these things in your heart.

Hexagram 50 seems like the ideal - but Hexagram 44 is exerting a strong ?pull? on it. It is also about change, but the kind that works outside and beyond your control, with unpredictable results. I would guess that you - and probably G as well - feel that a strong new influence has entered your life, bringing change you can?t quite get a grip on. The rise of new emotions can feel like hugely fertile potential, or like a threat to everything you thought you knew. The winds of change are blowing under heaven! How can you deal with these forces of change and fit them into your life?

The I Ching is more than hinting that this relationship will not just ?fit in? with normal life. It says quite clearly - ?no use to grasp the woman?. (The woman, I think, is the power of emotion, ?chance? and change who challenges everything that seemed secure.) If you don?t seek to grasp and control this, it can go a long way and bring about profound change.

The traditional reading of this hexagram is that such huge disruption and change, undermining all the established structures, is something to be feared and fought. Stephen Karcher thinks it is something to be welcomed. The I Ching doesn?t actually say whether it?s good or bad? How does it feel to you? And how do you suppose it feels to G?

Unpredictable, alarming change coming in?
sacred change you contain and cherish?

50,5 shows how the Vessel can contain even the raw power of Hexagram 44. It has ?bronze ears, a golden handle? - this is truly something of value. The ?ears? of the ancient Vessels are rings to insert a carrying rod: the Vessel is ready to be moved, and that makes it genuinely useful. But yes, ?ears? also means human ears - the I Ching is punning gently! What makes your ?holding? of the relationship truly valuable is your ability to hear G, your openness to be moved by him. (Lao Tzu wrote it is the space at the hub of a wheel that makes it move, the empty space in a clay vessel that contains. I wonder whether he?d just received this line?)

I hope this helps, at least as a beginning. I expect there will be more people gathering round to help very soon!
 

lafragolina

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Dear Hilary,
thank you ever so much for your explanation. The way you explain things is always so helpful and mind-opening!
Thanks again-
elisabetta
 

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