56.3 > 35 is it even worth trying ?

[Lana73123]

I’ve posted a couple of new job related queries over the past couple of months. I’m still struggling with the situation.
today I was feeling particularly vulnerable, alone, disheartened and discouraged at my new job so I asked the Yi “what does my long term future here (at this job) look like” and I received hexagram 56.3 changing to Heaxagram 35.
I read several old threads on here about the line 3. From what I gather this line is saying that I am an outsider and will always be. If I try too hard I will be presumed ambitious. If I try too little I would disappoint myself. I’ve tried to gently connect with coworkers, basically just trying to “break the ice” not trying to have them over for dinner parties or go on weekend shopping trips! Just trying to be friendly and approachable. Im trying to just “when in Rome do what the romans do”. And im also not trying too hard to where I seem desperate.

So for the job duties - I have skills. And that’s why I was hired. But it seems there are a couple of longer term employees above me that I must have “rubbed the wrong way”. the first few weeks were pretty good and felt I did not make a mistake by taking this job and leaving my previous one of 14 yrs. I was/am aware enough to know there is a learning curve/assimilation period. Consulting the Yi several times a week - I tried to make sure I was doing the best I could. But reading after reading over the past 3 months has yielded mostly hexagrams telling me (paraphrasing) to be quiet, danger all around, nothing you do will be good enough, disengage, etc. I’ve gotten Hexagrams 10, 11, 59 several times - different lines.
Stay small, don’t do anything big, don’t be ambitious, disengage etc. but that’s not why I was hired. Point blank - I was recruited because I *was* ambitious, questioning, high energy, creative etc. that’s why the owner hired me. Then after I get there - im put in someone’s charge who I truly believe is intimidated and threatened by me. Intentionally and with awareness - I have done nothing of the sort to come across that way - unless showing up and doing my job constitutes a threat.
I am being blocked from communication with the owner (the guy who hired me) and I am almost convinced I am being actively undermined
So today when I asked the what my long term looked like there - and got 56.3 changing to 35 - it was another blow.
I actually like the job and the company and I want to do them a good job. But a human can only take so much shunning, short and cold personal interactions, if any, no positive feedback (actually no feedback at all). I mean, this is not just an entry level job that takes no prior experience. It’s also not a CEO level position. It’s a small business that’s growing and I am excited to be a part of it. Im not ready to give up just yet - but I also can’t take this much longer. So when im reading things like “even if you cut off all your limbs, you will be small enough to fit in” - I wonder if it’s even worth the effort.
what’s the best outcome I can hope for with this line? Should I just just go in, do the tasks at hand, be a loner, try to smile …. And look for something else? Im afraid though that if I leave “too early” the owner might take it as im burning a bridge. When in reality I am just trying to feel like im a part of the team.
Im all ears… what do y’all think?
Thank you!! With gratitude,
lana.

 

[Lao_Tzu]

The great ruler speaks little and his words are priceless.
He works without self-interest and leaves no trace.
When all is finished, the people say, “It happened by itself”

 

[Lana73123]

Oh and I should say also that with mercury in retrograde since may 29 - until July 11 - I have decided to not try to “talk” to anyone there about these thoughts. I wasn’t wanting to add anything more to the awkwardness.

 

[Lana73123]

The great ruler speaks little and his words are priceless.
He works without self-interest and leaves no trace.
When all is finished, the people say, “It happened by itself”

I like this. Very much. In all of my queries over the past 3 months - that is indeed the advice from the Yi. You captured all of those tosses into three very concise sentences.
thank you, Lao Tzu. I must keep that in the forefront of my thoughts …

 

[redoleander]

Is it possible that the line is mostly cautioning you that the intense feelings you're having could cause you to act in a way that would undermine your long-term possibilities there? I'm not discounting anything you wrote (you're the one actually experiencing it, and it does sound quite hard) yet even when things are difficult sometimes the story in our head has wandered off from reality a bit. It's hard to know exactly what's true but if we believe it's hopeless we might burn it all down just to prevent the future hurt of it not working out, only to regret it afterward. It's possible the reading is saying this job isn't the best fit (and, if it isn't, it's still ultimately just one job and others are out there)... but the traveler in this scenario would be you (I believe) so perhaps the advice/info is more about you than them? Perhaps your perspective and actions play a big role in the answer to your question.

 

[diamant]

what does my long term future here (at this job) look like 56.3 > 35

The character for 56 is 旅.
It can mean stranger, traveller, but also "people marching under banner, brigade (i.e. a small army)".
That tells me that this company are not a really solid honest company, they're opportunists.

In position 56.2, someone of the above description acquires a servant in a hotel.
The servant is you, as you are an employee.
In position 56.3, that 56 type of person treats the servant very badly and destroys the hotel.

Does this workplace have a very high turn-around of employees? Do management sack staff on a whim? Many workplaces do, especially those who are involved in dodgy business, as they don't want the employees to stay long enough to find them out.

It sounds like a very toxic environment. Your long term future at this job doesn't look super great I'm afraid, and like you said yourself, it's not for lack of trying on your behalf. You've done all the standard things someone should do when starting a new job, and you're still, inexcusably, treated with contempt. If I were you I'd try my luck applying elsewhere.

 

[Lana73123]

Redolenader-
Thank you for your reply. You are totally right about circumstances seeming larger than they might be in reality. Totally right. I am or try to be aware and conscious of this bias of the ego. I’ve been working on/practicing self-realization and self actualization and I have started to “test” things out. Every time I have one of these “thoughts” (about a perceived negative) I ask myself - “is this real? Is this reality based or is it an ego mechanism?” In this process then I STOP, TAKE A BEAT, DISCERN — what is *intuition* and what is *ego*.
so in this specific situation I’m even more sensitive. Trying to not overthink. Redoleander, you are TOTALLY spot on - because it IS hard, am I creating a situation where I could just burn it down wipe my hands and dust myself off and move on…??
So overal - you’re reply was to make sure, validate, the situation is real!!! I think the answer is - yes it is real. There are others working here that have started dropping little hints/bombs. JUST YESTERDAY, a coworker approached me to fix an issue. During the discussions she said “well I didn’t know who to ask to fix this becuase of all the retaliation by “X and Y” … the same people I’m vining out on …!!!
But yes you’re right to be aware And I am sure there is still a bit of ego in all this - but it’s not imagined. I am not a drama queen!!! Lololol

 

[Lana73123]

what does my long term future here (at this job) look like 56.3 > 35

The character for 56 is 旅.
It can mean stranger, traveller, but also "people marching under banner, brigade (i.e. a small army)".
That tells me that this company are not a really solid honest company, they're opportunists.

In position 56.2, someone of the above description acquires a servant in a hotel.
The servant is you, as you are an employee.
In position 56.3, that 56 type of person treats the servant very badly and destroys the hotel.

Does this workplace have a very high turn-around of employees? Do management sack staff on a whim? Many workplaces do, especially those who are involved in dodgy business, as they don't want the employees to stay long enough to find them out.

It sounds like a very toxic environment. Your long term future at this job doesn't look super great I'm afraid, and like you said yourself, it's not for lack of trying on your behalf. You've done all the standard things someone should do when starting a new job, and you're still, inexcusably, treated with contempt. If I were you I'd try my luck applying elsewhere.

@diamant!!! —- you are on to something there !!! So to go a little further - the two employees that have been there the longest that I referenced above - they are basically in charge of the office portion of the business (it’s a construction company). In my opinion from what I have learned over 4 months - one of them has “conned” (yes, I’m being harsh) her way into being The Controller! this is the only job she’s had and started 5yrs ago as an admin assistant. But when I interviewed and hired I looked at that as a positive becuase I thought it meant they recognized talent and promoted from within. HOWEVER - over 4 months - I’ve discovered she a fake and fraud. All of books are really messed up. It’s almost impossible for anyone to complete a task without going to her to “fix” something. WHICH IS WHERE THE GASLIGHTING STARTS. To my knowledge there have been 3 people quit in the last 2-3 yrs. that doesn’t seem like a lot - but when the staff only 7 people…. That’s almost 50%.
do yes you are completely correct — it’s toxic.
But my hope was to block it out and rise above it and get to place where I didn’t have to deal with her (and that was the job description the owner pitched me) but she is blocking me. Ugh…

 

[diamant]

Sounds like she's got her greedy useless teeth firmly into the business... so not much you can do really. Try not to share your thoughts with anyone in there, it's way too small, don't trust any of them (at least for now). Toxic workplaces and people - what can I say! Too many of them

 

[Lana73123]

I was just re-reading the text and still exploring more commentary - and it occurred to me - at least in Wilhelm’s translation - it says “the wanderer’s inn burns down. He loses the steadfastness of his young servant”. It does not say the *wanderer* burned his inn down. I read a lot of past threads talking about burning bridges and such - but I think from that translation - it was something done by someone else.
Then for the servant - @diamant - I think I share your perspective from the translations I’m reading — I am the servant and am being treated as a “traveler”. But with the changing line - it’s moving toward “progress” which is good.
then, to go further — the inner hexagram is 28 - with that whole “ridge pole” issue.
it is all so beautiful how it all makes sense and applies to this situation.
I really wanted to find a way through all this becuase I think the opportunity is good for long term career. But I’m also not going to be abused by a fraud ….


diamant said
In position 56.2, someone of the above description acquires a servant in a hotel. The servant is you, as you are an employee.In position 56.3, that 56 type of person treats the servant very badly and destroys the hotel.

 

[Lana73123]

…. Try not to share your thoughts with anyone in there, it's way too small, don't trust any of them (at least for now)…

YES!!
I am doing what the IChing tells me - keep my head down, stay detached.

I trust NO ONE.

 

[diamant]

35 is usually translated as 'progress', but basically it shows things happening fast.

 

[my_key]

I asked "What my long term looked like there ?" 56.3 <> 35
The meaning of Hex 35 ( Flourishing ) is 'living in the day light'
The meaning of Hex 56 ( Soujourning at the Borders) is 'connecting the scattered few'
Long term this reading looks like it is advising you that you will bring things together if you keep letting you light shine. You are advised to persevere, and the Image relates that it is best to just get on with the job in hand in the manner that you feel is right without, compromising and without making a fuss.

You are a stranger wandering in a strange land - if you believe that the strange land is inhabited by outlaws then all you will see is outlaws. What is behind all this (nuclear hex 28) is a test of your ability to stand alone without fear even though your ridgepole is showing signs of sagging,

56.3 - Somewhere, somehow you have burnt down your resting place with the others you work with. Perhaps, unknowingly, just through being you and displaying your passionate energy. Something has hit a wrong chord. Organisations have 'ways of doing things' and a culture emanating from the senior people. It can be advisable to enter a such a room of strangers quietly to assess the 'rules' of the game before beginning to play. Learn what it is like 'living in their daylight' before asking them to 'live in your daylight'

Staying balanced and building small success on small success: Hex 56 is telling you that the long term 'brings good fortune'. Only you can determine if it is even worth trying to repair the situation you find yourself in.

......or it may be nothing like that at all for you.

Good Luck.

 

[Lana73123]

I asked "What my long term looked like there ?" 56.3 <> 35
The meaning of Hex 35 ( Flourishing ) is 'living in the day light'
The meaning of Hex 56 ( Soujourning at the Borders) is 'connecting the scattered few'
Long term this reading looks like it is advising you that you will bring things together if you keep letting you light shine. You are advised to persevere, and the Image relates that it is best to just get on with the job in hand in the manner that you feel is right without, compromising and without making a fuss.

You are a stranger wandering in a strange land - if you believe that the strange land is inhabited by outlaws then all you will see is outlaws. What is behind all this (nuclear hex 28) is a test of your ability to stand alone without fear even though your ridgepole is showing signs of sagging,

56.3 - Somewhere, somehow you have burnt down your resting place with the others you work with. Perhaps, unknowingly, just through being you and displaying your passionate energy. Something has hit a wrong chord. Organisations have 'ways of doing things' and a culture emanating from the senior people. It can be advisable to enter a such a room of strangers quietly to assess the 'rules' of the game before beginning to play. Learn what it is like 'living in their daylight' before asking them to 'live in your daylight'

Staying balanced and building small success on small success: Hex 56 is telling you that the long term 'brings good fortune'. Only you can determine if it is even worth trying to repair the situation you find yourself in.

......or it may be nothing like that at all for you.

Good Luck.

My_key,
It is EXACTLY like that! You got it for sure.

And you are exactly correct - I found out I did something that I was completely unaware of —until it was pointed out to me. I was arriving to work at 8:02 or 8:05. And the micro managers lost their minds (even tho time management was brought up in the interview and I said I wouldnt be micromanaged and I was promised that would not be the case.)
and another instance was about 3 weeks in after my whopping 3 hrs of “training” - I had about 30ish contracts to create and send out from 3 project managers. Never mind I’m new and there are no SOPs and every “template” is “broken” …. A 4th PM emailed 3 contracts and said TODAY these need to go out. My response was (and this was me setting my boundaries and being myself and not being a doormat) “Ok no problem - but it will not be done today as there are 3 other PMs already in line …”. The micromanager fraud came into my office and said (verbatim) “ It’s obvious you’re frustrated but Michael’s contracts need to go out so I am going to have someone else do them until you get caught up”. I said, with astonishment and a chuckle, “ I am not frustrated. Far from it. But I am backed up becuase 3 PMs came at me and Michael will have to get in line”. And her reply - which was even more astonishing - was “Yes, you are frustrated”. I thought I would die. I knew right then she was a gas lighter and I needed to realllllly watch my back ….
So, my_key — you are exactly right. All of this is about that ridge pole. Can I take the heat? Will I withstand the pressure?
All I can say is ….. they don’t know who they are dealing with.

And thank you for your reply, wisdom and time.

 

[Lana73123]

diamant said: …“That tells me that this company are not a really solid honest company, they're opportunists.”…

@diamant
This though has been churning in my subconscious since yesterday … and it is all hitting like a ton of bricks. The more I am here and the more I “see” - you nailed it with the OPPORTUNIST descriptor. The staff are mostly like that …. Mostly. A real-time example just occurred and my mind exploded with the connection.
So, I am understanding and identifying even more with Hex 56. I am a stranger in a strange land. What’s the kids song…. “One of these things is not like the other ones” ….

 

[diamant]

"I am a stranger in a strange land"
@Lana73123 I think you have slightly misunderstood what I meant. I see 56 here as an opportunist. I see 56 here as the company you work for. I don't believe you are the 56. I don't believe you are a stranger in a strange land. It's not you who will treat your 'servant' badly. The opportunists will treat the servant badly.

 

[Lana73123]

"I am a stranger in a strange land"
@Lana73123 I think you have slightly misunderstood what I meant. I see 56 here as an opportunist. I see 56 here as the company you work for. I don't believe you are the 56. I don't believe you are a stranger in a strange land. It's not you who will treat your 'servant' badly. The opportunists will treat the servant badly.

Ahhhh. Yes. I get it now!
thank you!

 

[Lana73123]

In my attempt to gain as much clarity as I can for this situation I asked two more questions.

“At the present, how does the owner (my “real” boss) of the company view me?” I received Hexagram 37.5.6 > 36
—I think this is good? Line 5 talks about benevolence and a proper foundation even tho it may not seem that way. And line 6 - the relationship founded on mutual respect. This is definitely what I had hoped for. As I have said - this company is growing and is a tremendous opportunity for me. I don’t think the owner/boss person knows what going on with his office manager people. I’m thinking he is so busy and has just trusted them (mainly because they have been there for several years) - it doesnt occur to him they are causing problems. As far as he knew - the 3 that quit over the past 18months - they were the problem/bad employees/stupid etc - becuase that’s what the “managers” told him.

“As a Whole, how does the office group view me now, after the luncheon?” Received hexagram 9.1.5 > 18
— I think this is good, too. Especially line 5 - it was pretty easy going and for the very first time I didn’t feel like an outcast. However, the caveat - the main abuser/micromanaging fraud person (who I believe is undermining me) has been on vacation this week. So she wasn’t there. Which could mean this small nice encounter is short lived - thus line 1 -“advancing and retreating.”

any additional thoughts, insights are welcomes and wanted especially if I’ve missed the meanings on these two queries.