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56.3 changing to 53

P

peace

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Hi everyone:

I don't understand how 56.3 changes to 53. It seems contradictory. 56.3 is about a willful person who is forcing things - at least that's how I interpret. (Is that correct?)

The question I asked was:
Results if I go to singles events?

(Background - I took a few months off from relationships since ending an engagement in April with someone I loved, but it became clear as time went on that it would be a lousy marriage. I've needed the time and believe I have processed alot of why I chose so badly. In the meantime, I've been spending time with two of my males friends - am comfortable for now with that -but wonder if it's time to "look" for a possible romantic partner).

Thanks,
Rosalie
 
P

peace

Guest
Hi Bradford:

That's right. I meant 35. I still have the same question.

Thanks,
Rosalie
 
J

jesed

Guest
Hi Peace

According with traditional teachings, changing lines are advices. Wisdom is knowing how to act according with the advice:

If you notice that you are in 56.3 situation, you know you are in danger.

If you know you are in danger, you'll walk with caution (like troops scouting enemy's territory).

If you walk with caution, you will progress.

So, in your case: "singles events" are dangerous territory for you. The only way you don't lose but progress is knowing the danger and walking with extrem caution (another interpretation: don't put yourself in danger going to this kind of events).

Best wishes
 

bradford_h

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Hi Rosalie-
I would concur with Jesed about being cautious.
I see 56.3 not so much as a prediction of a disaster or screwup as a cautionary reminder that the wanderer is putting himself in a very vulnerable position, one of extreme accountability - the normal amount PLUS the suspicion that is almost automatically heaped on the stranger. Just remember this and stay extra alert, and humble.
The Fan Yao, 35.3, in my personal understanding, shows the prince extending many liberties to his people in the hope that they will respond by learning the responsible exercise of liberty. To me this is laissez faire morality, that the exercise of freedom, together with accountabiity, is the best teacher of ethical behavior. Nobody is more free than the wanderer, but nobody is more accountable either.
So, if you go to singles events, use care and caution, keep your wits about you, and have a wonderful time.
 
P

peace

Guest
Thanks guys.
I think I still need more time to sort out what I did to contribute to my "fatal attraction".
(No, it wasn't fatal - but maybe it would have been if I married him.)

I'll stick with my friends for now!
 
J

jesed

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Hi Peace

"wonder if it's time to "look" for a possible romantic partner"

Maybe you could ask: how is the general diagnosis of my sentimental time nowadays?

It could be an useful question, don't you think?

best wishes
 
P

peace

Guest
Jesed:

Yup - it could be.
However, I still think "looking" is not a good thing. It kind of force fits things.

I would like to think that my bright eyes and open heart manifest in my being approachable to a person who is the same way.

I want it to happen naturally - as in someone noticing me and wanting to get to know me.

I still have a problem in wanting to be "found" and pursued - which actually negates the approachability issue.

I understand the 56.3 but not the changing to 35 - unless it means that if I'm cautious, I will make rapid progress.

Am I reading that correctly?

Thanks,
Rosalie
 

sherab

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Hi Rosalie,
When I look just at the lines in #56, I see that it is the third one changing... that tells me that you are in transition, that you have "stepped out" so to speak, from your center place (line 2). The 3rd place is often difficult, transitional, "on the way, but not yet arrived".
Then, when the top line of lower trigram, Mountain, moves, it becomes a yin line, Mountain is, among other things, about boundaries, protection, an area of retreat. When line 3 changes, it moves to Kun, very open, and, given your recent history, rather vulnerable. As soon as that line opens, the hexagram moves to #35 - the sun rising over the earth, and things start to move really fast - in fact maybe a little faster than you would like. Hence the caution. Fast progress, like passion, does tend to burn things up - like that place where you were resting after you broke up, (the inn, the resting place) - you may have to leave that behind as you step into the relationship dance again, after your time of sojourning away from it.
Take care, yes - but oh let the heart shine!
Sherab
 
P

peace

Guest
Thanks Sherab - I like your interpretation and it sounds good. This "resting place" is not typicaly and I have, at times, had to strongly remind myself to take time - which sometimes feels like a copout (to my ego).

Rosalie
 

auriel

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Peace
Please excuse any impertinance here, but it seems a specific has been overlooked.

56.3 is about forgetting the little people as one moves up the social scale. So it would seem that you would meet some 'studs' (the horses and audiences of 35) by going to the event, but looking for strangers like that, your oracle says, is specifically going to alienate someone, perhaps one of the male friends you are seeing has feelings for you?
 
P

peace

Guest
Auriel - You're not wrong about that.
There are some big issues that preclude a relationship with either of my friends - but meeting someone new would definitely cause hard feelings. All things considered, I'm keeping things status quo for now.

Thanks,
Peace
 

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