62.3>16 what to do now in life

[CheersC]

I have asked "what to do now in my life ?(i.e., projects, career, job, activities, that's the nature of the question)
62.3 to 16
First thing I noticed 62 is small things and not aiming at the top, so I thought any PhD and further education (there are courses that last 2 years but don't require to go there every day) should be discarded. But... The deadlines are usually on april for phd and the courses may start in September . I still wasn't able to look for the alternatives but i want to do something that allows me to do the many possible things ever, i wished i could do the more i can without regrets, without letting the time go....
I still have no idea on what my job life purpose is.
Other ideas are to enroll to my workfield order and work as a free professional and do what is asked me to do, like a research or something. But im still not sure about what's in the future for me...
The other possibilities are trying to get jobs as hostess or perfume sales assistant but idk...
I can't work as ambassador...
I'd liked to be a model or an actress as free time but i realized too late I'm old now, i was only studying after all, should have thought about doing it earlier.
I may be working in a library but the ideas are just so many and I can't think of me as being happy right now.
My past dreams are in the past, i have to deal with many things now.
I thought also about journalism and short jobs on tv but it may not be a good match if i enroll to my professional order.
Another idea was to work in agencies which select the cv but they pay u little and the internship lasts 6 months.

Hillary writes about that line "Not going past, he defends himself.
Someone following may strike him down. Pitfall.’

What does it even mean?
The first thing i think is that everything I will do will just be a waste of them (aim low) so i should do nothing and be jobless for a while or find something i won't be quite happy for...
Or... It says i can't put too many things on the plate - which also sucks because before i was only studying for those 10 years and i didnt carry projects or activities not for myself neither for my career. Time is more precious the more one gets old.

 

[SebastianS]

The main message of this line is to defend yourself from calamity. In this context, I would also think about a certain amount of self-inflicted calamity. Not sticking to something, not seeing the forest for the trees, etc. You should find something you really like, protect it from your doubts and stick to it no matter what. I wouldn't say that this omen mentions a certain profession. The most important thing is, however, to protect yourself from your self-inflicted pains. Don't discard your PhD - I wouldn't take this particular line as something to depress your ambitions, but more as an advice to protect yourself and the things you want to do from calamity.
So make a decision and stick with it.

 

[CheersC]

The main message of this line is to defend yourself from calamity. In this context, I would also think about a certain amount of self-inflicted calamity. Not sticking to something, not seeing the forest for the trees, etc. You should find something you really like, protect it from your doubts and stick to it no matter what. I wouldn't say that this omen mentions a certain profession. The most important thing is, however, to protect yourself from your self-inflicted pains. Don't discard your PhD - I wouldn't take this particular line as something to depress your ambitions, but more as an advice to protect yourself and the things you want to do from calamity.
So make a decision and stick with it.

It makes sense, I'm not satisfied of waiting either, I am comparing to people younger than me of 8 years and what I could have done other than just studying (which everyone does).
At first when u have written calamity I thought about other external disasters

 

[CheersC]

What if calamity is coronavirus...it is actually becoming a real problem.
(to resume the work/life path situation: I'm stuck already for 2-3 months... It's also gonna be birthday soon, I'm agin', I'm so sad 'bout it, darn time goes from 20 to 30)

 

[SebastianS]

Readings aside, I know how you feel. I'm 33 years old, still studying (mostly out of interest), I've been diagnosed with ADHD a year ago and my academic history is a whole mess of things never finished. So I can relate to feeling too old etc. But, really, this isn't true. I'm from Germany (I hope you don't mind my rather bad English), and there is a former actress named Marianne Koch, who had quite a good career in her 20s and 30s, but she figured that this isn't what she wanted, so by the age of 40, she got back to college and studied Medicine.
Well, she might have been pretty well off financially, so another (more or less prominent) example is a German actor who was known as a voice actor (they can support themselves, but they're certainly not awfully rich like movie stars) named Niels Clausnitzer. By the age of over 50, he started to study Medicine and Psychology, got his PhD at 59 (1989) and opened his office as a psychologist in 2003 (being 73) and continued to practice until his death in 2014. And these are just famous examples, but there are countless people who started off late and became successful. So don't discourage yourself.
I don't know where you are from, but from your postings in the Corona-thread I gathered you're from the UK? I mean, if you would live in China, I would certainly understand your concerns. But right now your focus should be to come up with a goal you really want to accomplish and stick to it. Don't blame it on outside influences and don't let you discourage by events you can't change and, most of all, don't discourage yourself because of your age (which you can't change, too). You're not doomed to failure. The only person who has the power to "doom" you is yourself. And right now, I get the idea that your own doubt is your worst calamity in life.
I'm not sure if the NHS is going to cover for it - but if you can afford it, you should probably seek counselling or some kind of coaching just to help you to be more motivated and positive about yourself and your goals. You need to lessen the influence of "calamity" in your life - and this is quite certainly your own doubts and nightmares because of your age.
I wish you the very best!

 

[CheersC]

Readings aside, I know how you feel. I'm 33 years old, still studying (mostly out of interest), I've been diagnosed with ADHD a year ago and my academic history is a whole mess of things never finished. So I can relate to feeling too old etc. But, really, this isn't true. I'm from Germany (I hope you don't mind my rather bad English), and there is a former actress named Marianne Koch, who had quite a good career in her 20s and 30s, but she figured that this isn't what she wanted, so by the age of 40, she got back to college and studied Medicine.
Well, she might have been pretty well off financially, so another (more or less prominent) example is a German actor who was known as a voice actor (they can support themselves, but they're certainly not awfully rich like movie stars) named Niels Clausnitzer. By the age of over 50, he started to study Medicine and Psychology, got his PhD at 59 (1989) and opened his office as a psychologist in 2003 (being 73) and continued to practice until his death in 2014. And these are just famous examples, but there are countless people who started off late and became successful. So don't discourage yourself.
I don't know where you are from, but from your postings in the Corona-thread I gathered you're from the UK? I mean, if you would live in China, I would certainly understand your concerns. But right now your focus should be to come up with a goal you really want to accomplish and stick to it. Don't blame it on outside influences and don't let you discourage by events you can't change and, most of all, don't discourage yourself because of your age (which you can't change, too). You're not doomed to failure. The only person who has the power to "doom" you is yourself. And right now, I get the idea that your own doubt is your worst calamity in life.
I'm not sure if the NHS is going to cover for it - but if you can afford it, you should probably seek counselling or some kind of coaching just to help you to be more motivated and positive about yourself and your goals. You need to lessen the influence of "calamity" in your life - and this is quite certainly your own doubts and nightmares because of your age.
I wish you the very best!

The coronavirus got worse everywhere, especially where I live at the moment.
Well, age was always a matter for me but now especially because after the studies and various problems u feel like ehm lost XD
Oh the examples u mentioned have started with careers that are good when u are young and then started studying... The opposite is not possible...
Probably having less expectations and perfectionism but I want to find my way and I just can't choose

Fingers crossed Seb, take care u too... If i will be still alive I will update any progress...hoping to not feel hopeless about the age and avoiding comparisons with the past...

 

[SebastianS]

Oh the examples u mentioned have started with careers that are good when u are young and then started studying... The opposite is not possible...

Yeah, and there are many others. Let's take my ex girlfriend - she's roughly five years older than me, completed a vocational training as a paralegal, but never found any chance to work as a paralegal. When we met each other, she was 27, was on unemployment assistance with occasional jobs in shitty call centers. Out of frustration, she decided to go to night school to catch up on high school. She finished this one, got to college aged 30. Right now, at 38, she works as a teacher. So, of course it is possible. And you, unlike my former girlfriend, have some academic degrees.
You biggest, biggest problem is yourself. You're having ideas of what you could do - then you're piling up reasons why this is doomed to failure, then you go on and settle for less and then you're going to go back it again and come up with reasons while even those minor jobs wouldn't work out. You're doing everything in order to procrastinate your decision. Even blame it on the f'ing Coronavirus.
If you want to achieve something, then go for it. Do anything. Do the things, that you are able to do - even if it's this one (it seems to me that this is an open door for you):

Another idea was to work in agencies which select the cv but they pay u little and the internship lasts 6 months.

Go for it.
And when it comes to acting - why aren't you acting, if that's what you wanna do? Do some independent movies for no money, at least get your name out. Even if the sets are in London and there might be someone living there who catched some corona.
Seriously, you should think about what you want. Not detailed, but fundamentally. Because right now, with your mindset, you will most definitely end up nowhere. And this is not due to your age, but due to your tendency to pile up reasons why all thinks are going to fail - and you didn't even try to kickstart any of them, this is all just in your head. Well, if you would have like zero opportunities, having tried dozens of times to succeed, always being denied - then I would totally understand some sort of frustration, but you got your degrees, you even have one opening for internship ("but they pay you little"), so you don't go through the doors that are open to you, and this, quite frankly, is a bit offensive to all of the people who have zero chances in life. Because the biggest luck in itself is sometimes to be able to work and make a name for yourself.
However, if you don't want to work and make a name for yourself, that's ok, too (if you have enough money to support yourself or if you have parents, inheritances, etc.). I wouldn't blame you. But you have to make this fundamental decision for yourself. Blocking everything out, not trying anything, even hesitating to finish your PhD at the age of merely 30 (I know a lot of guys who are late in their 30s and working on their PhD), probably with the chance to work as a Prof someday - this attitude of you will get you nowhere. But, again, it has nothing to do with your age, it has nothing to do with a lack of chances (because you have a lot of it), it's all about your absolutely negative mindset. Again, if you don't want to do anything and you can afford to do so, then do it and live a nice life, but you have to come to terms with yourself, you have to be honest with yourself. Right now, you're blocking yourself out of everything with absurd reasons like Coronavirus. You really have to focus on stopping this, even if it's with the help of a psychologist.

 

[CheersC]

Yeah, and there are many others. Let's take my ex girlfriend - she's roughly five years older than me, completed a vocational training as a paralegal, but never found any chance to work as a paralegal. When we met each other, she was 27, was on unemployment assistance with occasional jobs in shitty call centers. Out of frustration, she decided to go to night school to catch up on high school. She finished this one, got to college aged 30. Right now, at 38, she works as a teacher. So, of course it is possible. And you, unlike my former girlfriend, have some academic degrees.
You biggest, biggest problem is yourself. You're having ideas of what you could do - then you're piling up reasons why this is doomed to failure, then you go on and settle for less and then you're going to go back it again and come up with reasons while even those minor jobs wouldn't work out. You're doing everything in order to procrastinate your decision. Even blame it on the f'ing Coronavirus.
If you want to achieve something, then go for it. Do anything. Do the things, that you are able to do - even if it's this one (it seems to me that this is an open door for you):

Go for it.
And when it comes to acting - why aren't you acting, if that's what you wanna do? Do some independent movies for no money, at least get your name out. Even if the sets are in London and there might be someone living there who catched some corona.
Seriously, you should think about what you want. Not detailed, but fundamentally. Because right now, with your mindset, you will most definitely end up nowhere. And this is not due to your age, but due to your tendency to pile up reasons why all thinks are going to fail - and you didn't even try to kickstart any of them, this is all just in your head. Well, if you would have like zero opportunities, having tried dozens of times to succeed, always being denied - then I would totally understand some sort of frustration, but you got your degrees, you even have one opening for internship ("but they pay you little"), so you don't go through the doors that are open to you, and this, quite frankly, is a bit offensive to all of the people who have zero chances in life. Because the biggest luck in itself is sometimes to be able to work and make a name for yourself.
However, if you don't want to work and make a name for yourself, that's ok, too (if you have enough money to support yourself or if you have parents, inheritances, etc.). I wouldn't blame you. But you have to make this fundamental decision for yourself. Blocking everything out, not trying anything, even hesitating to finish your PhD at the age of merely 30 (I know a lot of guys who are late in their 30s and working on their PhD), probably with the chance to work as a Prof someday - this attitude of you will get you nowhere. But, again, it has nothing to do with your age, it has nothing to do with a lack of chances (because you have a lot of it), it's all about your absolutely negative mindset. Again, if you don't want to do anything and you can afford to do so, then do it and live a nice life, but you have to come to terms with yourself, you have to be honest with yourself. Right now, you're blocking yourself out of everything with absurd reasons like Coronavirus. You really have to focus on stopping this, even if it's with the help of a psychologist.

But it sounds like u ar talking of your problems ans other ppl problems now because u are blamin. Or not?
I was not blaming coronavirus, you talked about calamity, so I thought about coronavirus! first thing popped up in my mind - as there are sensed reasons to be worried, travels and many activities are actually suspended. Well happy for the guys who don't have regrets but it's not my situation, i wanted to know what activities to discard and what to aim for, to not have regrets, to be happy, and still young with the future ahead.
Well, other people or external influences are also involved, and everyone is a bit responsible in one's choices (when u give them advices and when u dont, but also the possibilities u have outside and the society). A psychologist would help everyone, probably it was better to contact him before university. Perhaps instead of jumping on unsatisfactory activities I thought too much before choosing cuz i wanted to be sure, but now time is not even as much as before to make random choices anymore.
I thought I had done an iching casting and now it turns out everything is good the same way