A situation that puzzles me - 50.6 and 52.2

[whitepolaroid]

I've been using the I Ching for several years and, though I consult this forum sometimes, this is my first post. And it's about a situation that still puzzles me to some extent.

After some years without anyone, I had a relationship this Autumn that didn't last long, but was quite intense and had a fated quality. Like it was something that had to happen.

This relationship had the power to make me forget a "platonic" love that could have been more than that. Something that happened many years ago but haunted all the relationships I had after. Just saying this to make a picture of the emotional power involved in this situation.

At the beginning of the relationship I rarely received positive hexagrams about the relationship. The relationship seemed to go so well (the intimate sphere was awesome and I'm not talking just about sex) and the hexagrams were saying quite the contrary. At some point, I even thought that the I Ching wasn't working anymore for me! I even doubted the I Ching and, for many years, the I Ching has been a precious guide to my life.

She broke up due to some small arguments, accusing me of insecurity (in part, she was right about that) and being possessive (not right about that; due to complete wrong interpretations of my words). She broke up quite angrily. I put myself in a subordinate position and try to fix things. But there was no way of fixing it. Whatever I'd say would be used against me. If I would answer no, I would be accused of that. If, on the contrary, I'd say yes, I would also be accused of that. So I kept still after the broke up. Weeks later she sent me a friend request on Facebook just to ban me just after, like saying "hey, I just banned you".

Finally feeling emotionally stable, and having realised that I was insecure with her at some point, I asked two questions today:

Is it worthy to hope to have a relationship with her again?
50.6 turning to 32

What course shall the relationship between us take?
52.2 turning to 18

Not very difficult to interpret 52.2: there is nothing I can do now about it except keeping still. Of course I was/am not happy with all the drama created by the end of the relationship. Read somewhere that this line refers to one disempowered by circumstances not of one's own making. Possibly true. She got so mad at me, possibly because something I said rang a bell in her concerning some past relationship she had in the past that went the wrong way. I don't know that for sure, but I'm quite sure of that, because of some things she said.

The first reading is quite a positive one, but I cannot make sense out of it. Can you help me understanding this? Thank you and wishes of a blessed 2020

 

[diamanda]

Hi whitepolaroid,

Her behaviour to you sounds awful and deranged. If her past relationship went wrong, does that excuse her behaving aggressively and insanely to you? Now that your relationship with her is over, would you go out into the world and behave like a lunatic to someone else, just because you're heart-broken?

Is it worthy to hope to have a relationship with her again? 50.6 > 32
The situation is beyond change. Recognise your value and continue as you are. 50 is about something new cooking, but here the 6th line is far removed from any notion of cooking. The cauldron is empty - and yet magnificent, so that's a compliment to you (for sure that's not her, she sounds anything but magnificent).

What course shall the relationship between us take? 52.2 > 18
I agree with your interpretation of this cast. And it sounds like she will do further nasty things to you, if you allow her. By the sound of her character, she'll most probably soon flaunt a new partner to further hurt you, and/or lure you back in just to torture you some more.

 

[whitepolaroid]

Hello Diamanda,

Thank you for your reply! I don't understand how someone in their 40s behaves like that (we're both 40 something). How do you read that she will do further nasty things to me based on 52.2? I read it more like a "reap what you sow" situation. Guess the new partner to further hurt me is, due to many things, a bit out of question. The fact we have some common acquaintances leaves me more uneasy.
It puzzles me the fact that I knew her (only professionally) for years before we got involved and her actions don't coincide with the image I have of her.

Happy New Year!

 

[diamanda]

Thank you, happy new year to you too!

Well if someone's character is like that, they can behave like that in their 40s, 50s, 60s, etc... The fact that you had a different image of her when you only knew her professionally is logical. Many people have an excellent public personna, but are not great at all towards the people closest to them.

About 52.2 > 18 and further nasty things: you asked what course the relationship between you two will take. So, even if one of the two stops, the other doesn't stop. This creates heart-ache. And results in rot and/or obsession/madness (18). Actually now that you say that you have common acquaintances, she might (instead of flaunting a new partner) simply slander you to everyone you both know with lies. Please be careful.