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any help please on hexagram 22 line 4

sparkler

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:bows: my boyfriend asked me to move in with him a few days ago, before then we had not seen each other for two weeks due to a misunderstanding...however when we got back together things seemed to go very well...he revealed how insecure he was about me and whether i was truly committed to the relationship...i tried to reassure him that i was and that i just need to take things slowly...then he asked me if i would move in with him...wasnt sure if he was calling my bluff or was serious...maybe he needs me to do this to confirm my commitment to him...well i asked the i ching `why did he ask me to move in with him'...the answer given was 22 line 4 becoming hexagram 30..can anyone offer any help with interpreting this please...i would very much appreciate it
 

Trojina

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Asking about another partys motives is dubious and difficult to interpret correctly. I do think the Yi answers on what you neeed to know so if i were you i would ask a question more along the lines of 'what is my best response to his proposal', because at the end of the day thats what you really need to know.

But seems to me the Yi has answered quite directly to you anyway. Theres no need to doubt him, hes not 'a robber'. In short seems likely hes asked you to move in with him because he wants you to move in with him, :D mmm because hes rather attached to you and likes to have you close by (30). :D mmm because he loves you ?

I guess 22 can denote a shallow intent, but this line does seem to encourage an alliance.
Perhaps others will have other ideas. Meanwhile maybe re phrase the question about what your best response is, if you want to.
 

sparkler

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thanks so much for that it makes sense...anyone else have any ideas on this?:)
 

rosada

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I see 22 as a beautiful fantasy.

I see 30 as two strong SEPARATE individuals who have yet to experience the give and take necessary to become A COUPLE.

So...your boyfriend has this lovely vision of heaven on earth with you, but...seems like he hasn't yet worked out the details. Just having you move into his house isn't going to magically transform things. He says you aren't committed? Ask him what he wants you to commit to? A day, a month, a lifetime? People try to avoid marrage vows by making no vows at all, but what happens then is we still have our expectations, but now they just remain unspoken and therefore more difficult to fulfill.

Anyway
22.4
He is not a robber... he is well intentioned
He will woo at the right time ..but as of now he has yet to make you an offer you can't refuse.

Until he does, you'd be wise to not sign any blank checks.
 
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sparkler

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...boy am i confused...what does that mean he will 'woo at the right time?' looking at the interpretaion of hexagram 30 it does not mention anything about seperateness...i suppose these hexagrams can be interpreted in many different ways...any other thoughts on this please?:confused:
 

Trojina

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Sparkler I reckon you will continue to be confused until you stop focusing on what he wants and think about what you want.

Besides which what other reason could he have for wanting you to move in with him other than he wants you to move in with him, lol:confused:

To get more responses maybe you need to say what is fueling your doubt about this ? You asked about his motive and Rosada and I more or less agree his motives do not appear to be suspect. Maybe you should delve a bit more deeply into your own feelings of hesitation, I'm sure they are there for a good reason, like to stop you entering a relationship thats not right for you however nice the guy is. Or who knows maybe your doubts are unfounded. Focus on you not him, asking yourself if he makes you happy etc etc and do you want to live with him etc
 

mudpie

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He asked you to move in with him out of pure honorable intentions and my take is that he is probably in love with you....he wants to be with you - pure and simple (30 is the synergy of being together) This response is very encouraging for anyone wondering whether they can trust a person's motives.
 

rosada

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The idea of separateness comes from the image for 30 being two suns. Think of 29 as having been this great challenge - shooting the rapids - that one emerges from strong and self assured. And if one is strong and self assured, one attracts those who are also strong and self assured = hexagram 30, two strong self assured independant types. As such they cannot be forced or manipulated. So to move forward they will evolve a relationship, a routine that ALLOWS one to Influence the other - 31.
Your friend wants the relationship because he fantasizes it will be the actuality of his beautiful vision. But he is not so clear of his ability to bring this vision into reality or even exactly exactly what the vision is. If he were clear he would make you an offer you couldn't refuse. But he hasn't gotten clear about it yet, but he's heading in that direction. So you can be assured "He will woo when the time comes."
Meanwhile, as Trojan says you need to know what it is YOU want. Questions that come to my mind right off is how long are you committing to? If it's till death do you part, why aren't you getting married? If it's only for a trial period how long is the trial? If it's for a year and you decide to call it quits before 12 months, is he obligated to help you with moving expenses? What are willing to give up for this man? What is non-negotiable? Hee-hee, he should just propose marrage, it's whole lot easier. But of course, marrage may not be what you want. Anyway, I think he has this fantasy/vision of life if you move in and it may not be your vision at all and you need to share with him your vision so you can make plans/compromises now while he's so eager to promise you the moon ;-)
 

jte

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Interesting take on 29/30, Rosada. I'd rather thought of the contrast more in terms of nature/natural metaphors. Like 29 is the days it's raining cats and dogs, whereas 30 is a day of brilliant sunshine, where the world is open to you (but it's still important not to let the freedom go to your head, hence the emphasis on correctness, etc). Still, I like your take because I think *in the life of a person*, the periods corresponding to each Hex can "feel" as you describe.

Just my two cents...

- Jeff
 

willowfox

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Hi sparkler,

22 line 4 says that you are in a situation that raises doubts, it also states that you find peace of mind in a true relationship with a friend that courts you. Keep everything simple and then you won't confuse your self. This line also says that the self willed man is not a robber ( has no ulterior motives on his mind), he is simply a suitor who seeks marriage (relationship).

Hex 30 It is a matter of bringing together what belongs together and success will follow. Wilhem calls this hex "Clinging", ie cling to your friend if you feel that it is the right thing for you to do. It also mentions that to care for the cow brings success. A cow is female and I would say that it refers to you in this context. Your boyfriend wants to look after you, as man and wife.
 

bradford

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It's mating season. We must be excused our excesses, our funny looking dances and our too- whte outfits.
 

rosada

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Interesting you are posting this Bradford, just as I am takng up hexagram 4 on the memorizing thread. Yes! Let The Youthful Follies begin!
 

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