Burnout and how to heal

[Lodestar]

Hi I'd really appreciate any feedback on the following readings for a back/right hip problem.


What is the imbalance, pain, emotion at the core of this physical problem? 2 receptivity

What can I do to create further healing? 20.2-59
Move beyond personal boundaries (get out and mingle?)

What progress have I made in my healing so far? 14.3.5-10
Pulling back my energies and being more discriminating about friendships etc?
Changing my habit of too much giving, too much concern for others and so little for myself?

What do I need to change right now in my feeling/thinking? 46 pushing upward

The problem with 46 is that I feel I can't commit to anything as I'm dealing with regular fatigue and back-pain and I'm genuinely afraid that if I set any goal I will lose my delicate balance and lose the progress I have made from burnout to at least being able to pay my bills and keep my life afloat. Oh I've just seen another translation as Gentle Persuasion..that would suit me so much better than any pushing..

How long more will it take to heal?!!!
3.5-24

 

[Tohpol]

I've tried physio, massage, counselling accessing repressed trauma, changing jobs, yoga, meditation, resting, swimming. Basically a lot, a lot of rest. Reading extensively. Avoiding compulsive goal setting and more living in the now. Focusing on self-care, nutrition, getting in touch with my basic needs. Next I'm going to try energy healing. I do think all of this has been highly productive and informative, I know myself so much better, I've changed for the better, but I still have this problem.

Well, you've covered a lot of bases there. But just to add to your extensive reading list I have to recommend one book which stands out for me for sheer depth and insight and that is When the Body Says No by Dr. Gabor Maté. I think you may find some further useful nuggets of practical help there.

What is the imbalance, pain, emotion at the core of this physical problem? 2 receptivity

This might refer to the idea of being more receptive rather than the go-getting of the H.1 the creative. Or, it may signal that you are letting too much in i.e. you're too receptive without enough shielding. The latter can operate at quite a subtle level especially if you find yourself constantly exhausted. This may indicate a propensity for absorbing others' negative energy due to your nervous system being too charged and ungrounded.

What can I do to create further healing? 20.2-59
Move beyond personal boundaries (get out and mingle?)

More contemplation needed. This might mean that there is too much rigidity and preconceived ideas as to how things should develop - too much anticipation, and insular thinking. A broader viewpoint is required. This can also be quite unconscious. We can all spend inordinate amounts of time on inner mental chatter, constantly seeking ways to be more than we are, since we subconsciously feel we are not good enough whatever we do. And so the relentless activity keeps on until we, well burn out, as you've discovered. Yes, get out and mingle but be mindful of how you mingle. Be open but not so open you absorb and give away energy to your detriment. Giving all is not what's required either. Limits are needed a la H.60.

What progress have I made in my healing so far? 14.3.5-10
Pulling back my energies and being more discriminating about friendships etc?
Changing my habit of too much giving, too much concern for others and so little for myself?

You assets are safe. Looks like the healing is going well as long as you maintain moderation in all things.
Pulling back and re-evaluating how you mingle with others. What is the driving force behind this giving? If you give too much than that is just as bad as giving to little (as is giving to get something in return). There is such a thing as pathological altrusim : ) No wonder your body-mind is screaming TIME OUT.

What do I need to change right now in my feeling/thinking? 46 pushing upward

The Yi seems to be saying that actually you are on the right track but a bit of tweaking is needed. H.46 is the often hard slog of realising your highest potential. That climb up the mountain can't be done overnight. Rather it takes a great deal of poise, attention to your environment and senses attuned to what your body is telling you as you ascend. Your back pain, fatigue and the consequent burn out is surely telling you that you need to be gentle with yourself. Stop trying so hard? And make sure you nourish yourself without pressing on too hard up that mountain despite all those folks waving at you from various ledges!

The problem with 46 is that I feel I can't commit to anything as I'm dealing with regular fatigue and back-pain and I'm genuinely afraid that if I set any goal I will lose my delicate balance and lose the progress I have made from burnout to at least being able to pay my bills and keep my life afloat. Oh I've just seen another translation as Gentle Persuasion..that would suit me so much better than any pushing..

Yes. The only commitment required here, I would say, is to nurture yourself. I know that is sometimes very difficult when we all have obligations and responsibilities. But I think the Yi is saying generally, ease up. It's okay, you won't lose anything you have gained, provided you push less, and slow down the pace - especially in your thinking and fretting.

I've known quite a few women who had back problems like yours which didn't have an obvious cause. Very often it was related to blocked emotional issues, sometimes from many years before. No surprise there. (Louise Hay etc.) What seemed to help the healing along for many of these individuals was to go deep into nature where you can wander alone. If you are an urbanite try to take a bus, or drive out to a suitably peaceful place to which you particularly like. Find a large, old venerable tree (the larger the better) or a big ancient rock that you really feel drawn to or that you like aesthetically, and sit next to it, preferably with your back against it. Ask for a bit of psychic protection in your own way and then place your attention gently at the place where the pain is sharpest - don't try to visualise or intellectualise anything - just be with it and see what comes up. Be very aware of your tree / rock while you do this. Some folks have just said "let it go," with a simple intent. I have found that many women (almost all) burst into tears quite quickly. There is something very grounding and healing about this simple process. If not curing the ailment, it does go a long way in loosening things up so that healing can take place more quickly. Try it and see. Obviously take a friend with you if you feel a bit vulnerable and whom you can trust.

How long more will it take to heal?!!!
3.5-24

Reiterates the idea of nourishing yourself and not expecting to make the leap in the shortest amount of time. (?!!!) We humans are complex beings. Precision bio-chemical machinery laid over gossamer-like energy bodies that are constantly processing incoming/outgoing messages. Give your mind and body a break! : )

 

[ginnie]

As an adjunct to the excellent suggestions offered above, I'd like to recommend the Lose the Back Pain program put together by Jesse Cannone: www.losethebackpain.com. This addresses how imbalances in our various muscle systems gradually bring about pain, often because of too much sitting.

 

[Lodestar]

And beneath, money & survival.. 36.1.3.4.6-35

Thank-you Ginnie, I'll look into that!

Hi Topal, thank you so much for your time and feedback. Greatly appreciated!

Brought up catholic meant pathological altruism was my default setting! Also living by simplistic empty aphorisms like 'treat others as you wish to be treated' & 'forgive, forgive, forgive' (but no accountability) & give with no expectation of reward' (or even basic politeness or respect) has just meant a lifetime of no boundaries & misdirected love and effort.. That book looks excellent, I'll certainly add it to my library.

Interestingly, after posting this, I came across a course on 'shielding for empaths' and signed up!
Your advice about going into nature made me cry, just the thought of it brings up a massive longing!!

My impatience and anticipation I realise is mostly based on financial fear.
Health issues mean time off work and loss of income which increases anxiety and impatience!

- that alone is an excellent lesson, can I put my needs even before my fears about money?!...
Money, the major symbol of survival and safety - though very often friendship, being in the right place, doing the right thing for you, looking after physical and emotional needs are far more powerful and reliable sources of security, especially in the long term.

How should I think about money at this point of transition in my life? i.e. How can I feel safe enough to put my physical and emotional needs ahead of everything else, including work? 36.1.3.4.6-35

Any thoughts?

I know I attract stressful and unsupportive work environments because I don't put my core needs first, so I end up in a draining spiral.. I feel if I could just nail this self-nurturance, shielding and putting myself first, I could radically alter the situations I attract, even though that seems distant right now!

Once again thank-you so much for your very accurate and helpful reply Topal!

 

[Tohpol]

How should I think about money at this point of transition in my life? i.e. How can I feel safe enough to put my physical and emotional needs ahead of everything else, including work? 36.1.3.4.6-35

Your learning curve resonates with me I have to say. I went through pretty much the same thing for many years until I got SO sick of it I knew I had to re-enchant the situation. And that meant dispensing with rationalizations about the past and gaining perspective about who I was, and could be in the present.

In other words, I got gained a constructively angry and channeled it accordingly i.e. against all the useless outmoded **** which I had collected within. It's all very well being an empath, sensitive, caring and "nice" but sometimes you have to be the Goddess Kali and breathe some f***ing fire so that you can coalesce all that dissipated energy. Get firm with yourself. (Perhaps this is especially true for women with this type of body-mind.

36 is Hiding the light has the trigrams of the receptive (earth) and sitting below it is The Clinging (fire). So, here we have the same themes of hiding your true value drawn from the correct quality of receptivity and the dynamic fire, the latter which needs a steady centre to make sure that a) the fire /nourishment has a proper source, and where the earth element is scorched by its often natural disequilibrium.

So, we have within 36 the following:

Difficulty/dark night of the soul encasing the nature of receiving/giving and your sources of nourishment/creativity and soul work.

and further simplified:

hiding soul potential < quality of receiving > core soul dynamic

The Yi has given you an accurate rendition of your current learning curve.

36 is always both a hexagram of hardship yet enormous potential in my view. I've had this a lot over the last several years and provided you are true to the teachings, the creativity it bestows can be liberating and powerful. Keep that in mind as you go forward. You have "illumination" within you, now you have to protect it and nurture it for it to grow into the fire that liberates and naturally fuel others.

Line 1: describes a state of deprivation and difficulties which can lead to faulty reasoning and excessive worry around - in your case - the subject of money. The more you obsess about this the bigger it becomes. This is clearly a major lesson in your life with one of the key challenges for you is to stop measuring your intrinsic self-worth through monetary value as you've stated. It's becoming a distorted symbol of energy potential within. So, this line is saying "yes, there's difficulties in your thinking on this but it can change, as the other lines in this hexagram show.

Line 3: Shows you that you have isolated the challenge, the shadow that is teaching you. Theory is one thing but application is another eh? (This used to be a line to which I used to meet again and again). Now is the time to tackle this line of thinking. Which connects to ...

Line 4: ... which tells you how to go about tackling this shadow: not confronting it head on or suppressing anything but by not giving it the oxygen of identification. In other words, cut off the incessant, circular thinking and emotional charge. AVOID it rather than attempt to eradicate it. Your challenge is to do this while having daily triggers in your face asking you to fall back into the familiar pattern.

Line 6: shows that these challenges are well within your grasp to conquer. It may even be inevitable provided your perception is absolutely clear as to what you have to do and how you see this period of your life. It may leave you spent but paradoxically, it may require much less energy than you think to come through this. By economising on all that stress and worry and by degaussing the notion of survival - even if there is a realistic component to this - you can reach the other side and let your light shine.

The background to this is fittingly, H.35 "progress". Redefine what this progress is to you. Live up to your name of "Lodestar" and fix that star within and KNOW it. Feel it there amid all your worries and each time you experience the triggers that demand a reaction, place your attention there and fill your vision with that sun inside, symbolic of your core needs. It has always been there. Ya just gotta develop within while attending to the nuts and bolts of our world. You are not alone in that respect as you know.

You can do it! Keep us updated.

P.S. If the nature aspect did create that yearning for you then get out into it at the earliest opportunity if at all possible.

 

[Lodestar]

Topal you totally understand the territory! Amazing, your understanding is so reassuring during this time.

Re-enchantment
Kali!! :demon: Constructive anger channelling lost/misguided/stolen energy..

Line 4 - stop the fight with the shadow, the confrontation is not productive but draining..eyes to the horizon..

So I need to fight to unite and protect my energy - and then not lose that energy through fighting what can't be beaten through confrontation - the shadow. (This is excellent, like many I've had that in reverse)

'Fix the star within and know it' - ah the greatest koan of all..how to do this? 23.3-52

I've got to admit to the necessity of the path, that the need to do this will never go away, so I might as well get on with it and work on the courage and skill to walk it.

Again, I greatly appreciate your time in answering my query. :bows:

 

[anemos]

This might refer to the idea of being more receptive rather than the go-getting of the H.1 the creative. Or, it may signal that you are letting too much in i.e. you're too receptive without enough shielding. The latter can operate at quite a subtle level especially if you find yourself constantly exhausted. This may indicate a propensity for absorbing others' negative energy due to your nervous system being too charged and ungrounded.

Topal,

I agree with the embolden one. That has been my experience in some occasions and if my memory serves me well there were a couple of members had the same experience with hex 2. This is an aspect of hex 2 not usually mentioned here .