Clarity on relationship - Hex 8.4 to 45

[Lionheart]

Hello Everyone

I'm hoping you can help provide me with some clarity in relation to my reading. Basically my bf of 8 months started pulling back his affections 4 months ago, yet stayed in contact and continues to see me. (we're in a long distance relationship) I've asked him about it and all he told me was, "yes I've pulled back" but nothing more and I didn't ask as I should've. So I did a reading on it.

My question: "Why did he really pull back his affections from me, what is hidden beneath the surface? How does he really feel about me?"

I got Hex. 8 Holding Together/Union - 4th line changing and going into Hex. 45 Gathering Together
I take this to mean staying together but having common interests and have places and occasions to make sure to continually renew the connection. The 4th line changing tells me that maybe he pulled back because I lost who I was or seemed to forget who I am when with him? Also that maybe my indecision with not knowing whether to jump into the relationship completely or not is being picked up on his end so he pulled back. But I don't know this to be the case 100% or if his pulling back is being caused by something else. Is this showing me he is resisting getting close to me?

Hex. 45 confuses me a little and this is where I'm really seeking clarity as it's what's to come. This again refers to uniting through common goals and shared bonds (maybe he feels there's not enough of this?), but also of danger. Being forearmed to ward off the unexpected things that can crop up in relationship to others. But it does reference working toward a common goal will make the relationship thrive. Is this ultimately what the reading is saying between these 2 hexagrams? That perhaps we haven't been having enough shared goals? I also wonder if he is or was emotionally cheating on me.

He does want me to move to where he is and has talked about moving in and marriage (his student visa expired and I want to go slow to make sure he isn't using me for that and I've told him as much!). But that feels too soon for me because I keep feeling something isn't solid with him or there's a disconnect on some level where I can't connect as deep as I want to with him. Again, I'm not sure if it's because both of us have been riding the fence, not sure whether to jump in wholeheartedly or not. I am more then willing to jump in once I feel like he is pursuing me the way he was in the beginning and making me feel like he really wants to be with me more. I just think it's weird that some of his affections dropped off, yet he stays in touch everyday like clockwork. When I've asked him if he's still attracted he says yes and that he's still here so this leaves me confused. I do love him, I just want to make sure he's as ready as I am for this relationship. Is this reading asking me to be more full on into the relationship instead of being indecisive and also that he needs to be more loyal to it as well?

Am I interpreting this correctly?
Thank you for any help with this.

 

[moss elk]

8.4 : Has he taken up with a new group of people,
religious organization, or some snobby peers that are advising him to pull back?

 

[innertruth]

I am sorry for how it may sound to you. But here is how I see it:
8.4 line talks about outward union with something above (exemplary).

He might have found someone he thinks of higher than of you. It might be qualities he finds more attractive (be it wits, personality or else)
He realised his worth (45) and is aiming for someone who would suit him according to his gathered
opinion about himself.

8.4 is not 8.5 (where there is union and complete harmony with the object).
8.4 is only striving to achieve such union.
In other words, he may not be satisfied with what he has with you

in 45.4 (talking about humility and self-worth without being over-confident) - it seems like
he would better be alone than with somebody he doesn't feel to be with..

 

[Tim K]

I see 8.4 as wanting to be in a relationship and being able to show it to others. I mean not some private skype sessions but something more tangible and real.
I don't quite understand where he lives and have you went on an actual physical date yet?

He wants to be close to you and really united. So I guess he got tired of waiting and now makes less effort, still hoping for you to show some initiative.

 

[Lionheart]

I appreciate everyone's reply.

@Moss elk - Not that I know of. Just the same people he's always been friends with. I have my suspicions that maybe he likes one of his female friends here and there but other then a sneaking suspicion, not much has changed that I know of.

@innertruth - This is possible. However there was no changing line in the 45th Hex. The changing line only applied to Hex. 8

@ashteroid - This makes a lot of sense to me. He has asked me more then once when I think I will be there (where he is). I was supposed to be there in June, now it's been pushed back to Nov/Dec.

He lives 1 state away from me and is a 6 hour drive. I used to live in the state he lived in (Im from U.S.) but have seen him many times in person and stayed with him since we first got together at the end of January of this year. I do think maybe he is getting impatient however. Seems I need to put a move on it. But I know part of me wants to know he is invested in me as much as I am in him, otherwise I don't have to rush to move as fast.