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Contact? 3.2.6>61

mythos

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Well, hello OnlineClarity,

I thought I'd post a reading I did today, simply because there isn't any discussion on it yet.

So, the question was "whether to plan to make contact with an individual?"

The past was messy but things have cleared up, for me, and I've made a reconciliation gesture that was received well (a birthday message). It would be great to start fresh.

This was a romantic liaison of a short duration (3 months) but I'm not one to forget people who have altered my perspective dramatically, even if the experience was bitter and sweet, salty and sour, all at once. It forced me to recognise my purpose and meaning (in going deep inside myself and coming to understand how little I knew about anything or anyone), despite being one of those possibly annoying people who always had an opinion. Expression, not communication, was my thing.

I've since talked to people, old friends and heard and listened, to learn what I had no idea I didn't know. I've got many of my male friends and family to lend insight into how my own attitudes, presentation and behaviour affected the man I ask about here. :) I return favour!

I know the question today could be a yes/no question but it's more, meant to indicate how and if the thought of making contact should be entertained.

3: Pushing upward..."Blofeld: Difficulty followed by sublime success! Persistence in a righteous course brings reward; but do not seek some new goal (or destination); it is highly advantageous to consolidate the present position. [The fundamental idea of this hexagram is that of birth and growth amidst difficulty, as with a sprouting seed becoming a young plant and forcing its way through the earth. Our affairs, being still in their early stages, are vulnerable; we must not wander forth, but attend to them until they ripen; then, with proper care, the seed will bring forth a splendid tree. The upper trigram, a pit, suggests a need for caution; but, if we heed these omens, our success is assured.] "

and "Anthony: This hexagram means that we have not yet found the correct path.It also means confusion: too many possibilities. Nothing is clear. This lack of clarity is the “hindrance” referred to in the first line of the hexagram. In the second line, the remedies that come forth are inappropriate. In the first stages of dealing with a problem, we are tempted to grasp at solutions, whereas we should wait until the proper actions become clear."

This symbolizes, to me, that nothing is yet fully settled. That though it feels clear, it's actually still not clear. So, to wait.


Line 2: "Legge: Advance is even more difficult for the second line than for line one. She is magnetic, and pressed by the dynamic line below her. Above, in the fifth line is the ruler with whom union should be properly sought. All these circumstances suggest the idea of a young lady sought in marriage by a strong suitor with whom marriage was unsuitable. She rejects him, and after ten years marries the only suitable match for her. "Things resume their regular course" means that she is now at liberty to seek a union with line five."

This is to say, that while feelings linger (of any kind, like the twinge that led me to ask the question today) it is best to allow them to clear, naturally. Then what is meant to occur, will. To make contact now, would be to be grasping at straws, confusing what will soon flow, without my pushing anything.

Line 6: "Wing: You have lost your perspective. You can no longer see your initial difficulties realistically, nor can you find your way out. This is disgraceful and will cause you much regret. It is best to begin again."

To contact would be to mire the clarity completely and just cause a disaster. Don't even begin to think about it lol

Hexagram 61: "Legge: Inner Truth denotes the highest quality of man, giving its possessor the power to prevail with spiritual beings, with other men and with lower creatures. There are two magnetic lines in the center and two dynamic lines above and below them. The magnetic lines represent the heart and mind free from all preoccupation, without any consciousness of self. The two dynamic lines immediately above and below them are each in the center of their respective trigram, and denote the solid virtue of one so free from selfishness."

In the Difficulty of Pushing Through in hexagram 3, there lies an Inner Truth (hexagram 61) that mustn't be disturbed by my thinking or planning. So, let it be and carry on with processing to get to 61.

Anyway, thought I'd share and please feel free to share your views, in reply.

Thanks!
 
S

sooo

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My view is that your view looks quite thorough. Pushing upward is more often associated with 46 but I think it's an interesting and appropriate name for 3 as well, only I'd include the difficulty of a new beginning to this upward movement. If you consider a sprout, born of a seed, using all of the chi it possesses to push up through the soil, encountering possible hostile environmental obstacles: rain, wind, drought, being trodden upon by any number of things - it's no easy accomplishment, and the first hours are often the most critical. It stands a chance of new life but it's no cake walk, and there's surely no guarantees.

Even 61, in the light or shadow of 3, shows the innate connection is jeopardized by the challenges it faces. However, in spite of this, line 6 offers encouragement through a sort of boo-hoo mockery, and line 2 assures that you are attuned to one another. That's hopeful. Just remember that budding relationships require nurturing.
 

mythos

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Thank you sooo, I probably had never respected the fragility of relationship dynamics (friendship, lovers, SOs, family) quite so much until this experience. Yes, the difficulty of pushing through into life and truth. It reminds me of a wildlife documentary I saw once where thousands of turtles are hatched on a beach each year and they race for the water as birds circle and crabs run at them. In pushing through 3, the difficulties, you are always nearer or further from inner truth. In pushing too hard, you risk the process of getting to Inner Truth. Here, in this reading, I take it to mean keep pushing through but make no great movements, don't alter the course (that currently means pushing through the process of something that feels like inner truth but my own or the truth of the story - like the 'purity of the story')

Thank you for your thoughts Sooo :)
 
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S

sooo

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Love the hatchling sea turtle imagery for this reading.

Roger_leguen_wwf-canon.jpg


It's estimated that only 1 in 1,000 hatchlings will survive to adulthood. Talk about a difficult beginning. Plus 61 is said to be the image of an egg, and the potential truth of life which lives within.

An egg is hollow. The light-giving power must work to *quicken it from outside, but there must be a germ of life within, if life is to be awakened. - Wilhelm

Another interesting fact, the gender of the turtle is determined by the surrounding temperature while in the egg. Warmer temperatures produce females, colder produces males. *So even the exact proximity to the water and sun's warmth upon the nest play a critical role in the fate of the turtle.

Thanks for that wonderful association!
 

mythos

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Sooo, love the accompanying image. How cool you made the egg connection. 3>61 henceforth will be, for me, the Turtle's Perseverance for Life

The heat of the sun determining sex is an epigenetics at its best but also, a great example of the Iching itself, as a book of Changes.

Whatever happens, whatever we do or don't do, as a reading lives out its day, like the intensity of the sun on the still egg, something is doing within and around us, to change and form us.

Next time, the day seems long and the terrain of life, difficult, I'll remember the turtle and that whatever I think I'm doing, something is always changing and forming me, invisibly. :)
 

pocossin

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Whether to plan to make contact with an individual?
3.2.6>61


Yes, the casting is auspicious for union. Don't just plan, do it. But don't have a messy future. Make it clear to Individual what you want. You know enough about Individual to know whether or not he is permanant partnership material. Make clear to him the future you envision.
 

mythos

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Thanks Pocossin,

I think though, because I asked about making contact, the lines, taken to 6, indicate following what feels right and being honest about that, pushing through the fog to the truth, or making my way to the sea, as a hatchling turtle.

Making contact now doesn't feel right or honest. I don't have any reason and I don't feel any pull to :) And I gather, by following this, the truth of the situation is revealed anyway.

Also, I have no partiality. Like, whether the union is with this person or with another person, it's just important to follow the feelings honestly. I know what I am and what I value.

I think feelings for someone can become overly intense and that's not a healthy basis for a relationship/union.

Asking the Yi generally suggests that feelings are intense or out of balance and the journey becomes to sift through those feelings and understand what they reveal. I think experiences of intense feeling for another person hide the greatest secrets to our personal release/liberation from what blocks us if we observe the experience of them as they move through us, compelling us to compulsion and eventually, through to release.

In this, these feelings uncloud me enough to see my truth of what is healthiest for me in all things. :) I value this experience and appreciate the delicacy of pushing through without the expectation of romance... it is purely to flow with what feels true.

Of course, following reading your post, I asked what my feelings are about this person and received 3.2>60

This is probably accurate. I carry around the mulch of the feelings and probably also, with this, the hope that his development has been like mine and we'll reunite with celebration of our respective journeys and all that we've learned. Then, decide we love each other deeply and marry, have babies and live happily in adventures til the end. It is a hope that I strand through, every day, as I meet new people and build older relationships. Who can tell where these concepts come from that we carry, sometimes. But often, it's just a matter of waiting for that answer to reveal itself... or for the totally unexpected to appear.
 
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pocossin

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If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them (Walden, 18.5).
 

Trojina

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I've not read the whole thread...just the question ....but no I don't think the time is right to connect. I have known the 10 years in 3.2 to be quite literal . One just isn't ready, time not right...I think some translations say the bride is too young. 3.6 I've seen refer to miscarriages of all kinds and there was one thread here where someone asked whether to carry to term or abort a pregnancy, got 3.6 for both option but miscarried anyway...just saying that was quite a literal answer. With these 2 lines I'm thinking if one did try to 'mate' with a bride that was too young (3.2) a miscarriage might result(3.6).

But you have 61 as the relating hexagram so my feeling is there is something true there that is not ready to be fulfilled yet. So you'd need neither to force it to fruition nor to completely cast it from your heart. Just let it be there in your heart and go on with other relationships and so on....and who knows in some long time...maybe even ten years, there may be a relationship.

I think if you tried to go ahead a metaphorical miscarriage might occur. Also the yang change pattern is 4 and the yin is 50. There is still so much to be cooking...things are just not ready.


I think you have said this is pretty much how it is in your last post ?

What does 3.2 say minus commentaries

'Now sprouting, now hesitating, now driving a team of horses.
Not robbers at all but marital allies.
The child-woman's constancy - no children.
Ten years go by, then there are children'

From Hilary's book.


Child woman's constancy ? Something is true but not yet developed enough to bear children/fruit. As I say I have seen this literally as something taking ten years to flower.
 
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mythos, congratulations for the excellent exposition about your reading and context.

I just got the same reading (!) within a similar context and your post as well as other's collaborations are really enlightening.
 

mythos

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In not contacting this person, I've been carrying something wonderful to term and it's, I guess, alive and well.

In every sense, by allowing it to stay inside of me, giving it the time it's needed, I have learned more than I could have ever imagined - that's the great thing about learning - you can't ever imagine it - you find it and it fills you :)

Thank you Fern_of_the_woods, Pocassin, Trojina and sooo

The truth is discovered in time!! Line 2

And line 6? Well, it usually is like the friend who just shakes their head when you ask something you've asked 18 times only because you're in 'that' place. It's like "You already know this" - It reminds you just why you knew what you were asking about would be a pretty silly idea to follow through on. But it's kind because it stays with you and reminds you, there is a wedding, there is truth, there is time.
 
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thanks for the update

Your words are full of beauty but I can't be sure how it actually developed...
You did not contact and kept being alone?
Or not contacting brought you together with that person?

If you like , it would be enriching to know some more about your findings, your learnings
 

mythos

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Thank you Fern_of_the_woods

Well, I continued alone.

I learned something that I suppose many people might find sad.

Before I'd met this person, I'd engaged in relationships where my behaviours were pandered to or I was too wrapped up in my own head to recognize that I needed to change anything. Generally, I avoided relationships altogether and only had them with people I found difficult and almost repelling. I was already so vulnerable that I identified very much with my behaviours and the idea of anything being wrong was very threatening especially as, in a way, for a long time, all I really had going for me, was how well I came across. I was very driven to be a warrior, to rise above my childhood and in so doing, I adopted ‘characters’ that seemed to represent this.

This person engaged me on my behaviours, subtly questioned or provoked and didn't pander or enable enmeshment. And eventually it ended.

Afterwards I was left with trauma - not because of him but because in being with him and having real feelings and opening up - when he was gone, there was just this tangled, hungry mess.

Rather than 'forget him’, blame him (although I’m not going to lie, this happened plenty in passive aggression) or pretend to not see what was exposed, I gave value to the tangled hungry mess, even though I had no idea what it was.

Sadly my own emotions were always very alien to me so at the time of all this happening, I didn’t even know I liked him. I’d come from a very messed up childhood and my approach was to create and to be a warrior, to intellectualize. The last thing I wanted to do was be vulnerable as I saw this as a huge weakness. I saw romance and love as weak. I'd claimed that my interest had been due to conditioning, because it was some extension of a story, because it was a game I was playing, it was a divine tale and he was gate keeper, it was a lesson etc.

For the year, while I explored the mess and learned to listen, researched every book and blog about psychology, opened up to just not having a clue, I also chose not to engage in any deeper romantic relationships, to be honest with everyone and especially myself (knowing my honesty was flawed), as the year passed. For one, it was really important for me to distance from being sexualized and to find new ways of relating.

So, what came to term? Well, sadly, as I say, I’d never admitted what I’d come from. I was more interested in being a pirate that bad sh*t had happened to but who lived against all odds to ride the high seas in glory. I saw in myself, narcissism, no boundaries, degrees of bi-polar behaviour, enmeshment, codependency and living exclusively to serve the ideals and dreams of others. I face the reality of my childhood sexual abuse, enmeshment and neglect and the reality that being a pirate was a way of avoiding forming intimate relationships that were far more terrifying than navigating violent criminals (something that I tended to do, non-sexually, for the adrenaline kicks) . Even liking someone was insane and I didn't date people I liked. I realized in all my life, I'd felt horrendously selfish for ever even thinking of having my own family. This man was the first man that I liked, I just couldn't admit I actually liked him. I know that's messed up and I know, for most people, to come together, it is as simple as two people liking each other but for me, this feeling this was like poking at a rattlesnake.

Perhaps I approach a time in my life where I can have a healthy relationship with someone. I hope so. I work at balance and structure, am going into therapy and anonymous meetings and have developed a level of honesty in my relationships, including with my siblings that would have seemed inconceivable to me a year ago because my trust abilities were so badly damaged. I've come a long long way this last year.

I finally acknowledge that I, myself, me, as an individual, liked and like him, genuinely. That these were my real feelings and that I'm a real person allowed to have feelings for a man in a romantic context. Of course, it is semi-bitter-sweet to recognize that I did like him and that he's probably a perfectly decent person. As am I.

Anyway, I hope that gives some insight.

3>61 Seems fairly apt :bows:
 
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sooo

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You made contact, enjoyed a season together, and the season moved on as seasons do.

As a friend said to me recently, nobody's perfect.

I recognize something in you with which I'm familiar (61?): transparency. It's not a trait people, well most, care to get too close to. Or, you could call it candor. Whichever we call it, it tends to not be well understood, nor tolerated for long. Turning inward for refuge, we find ourselves alone. Being alone, we find fault, because we are candid with ourselves. Don't overlook the good, or you turn against yourself. Nobody's perfect.

b0ebebb3d04d80b019e4c16d737f987d.jpg
 
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I have no words... Thank you so much for sharing this

The work you are doing is excellent and the way you express it is a real gift for anyone reading it.

I have no words... in english at least
 

mythos

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Well, before this I found fault and couldn't address it because it went too deep so I didn't have access to all the energy it was using up. In turning myself inside out, it is hard to find fault because I see how they aren't faults, they're just energy awaiting action and because I understand what sort of action I'd like to take the action can be something that I feel, finally, balanced about.

Mostly it was stabilizing :)

As for the seasons, yes, I suppose sooo lol

But anyway, I respect my feelings much more now I've met them!

In so far as transparency goes, I think turning my sh*t to fertilizer and growing healthy nutritious thoughts in good soil enables people who also are on a path of, I don't know, greater self, to feel release with me. Each time I venture forth I meet someone who releases and as they do, they teach me.

When I first started, though, there were so many misunderstandings and I had no idea how to control THhe SouND OOOOOFFFF mY OwN VOIice. I was learning boundaries and how to speak about feelings. I hadn't always said the gentlest things or possibly even anything that other people found accurate about themselves. So, lol, sooo, yes, I lost many semi-friends I'd wanted to be rid of and those that came back are pretty excellent as are those new friends I make where everything is happening in awkward human honesty, humour and real time. Also, in learning my voice, I guess I'm learning that I do come across more clearly, more often and I can finally say things I had no idea how to say a year ago. It's a practice and learn and listen process!

Thanks for the positive reinforcement :)

Your comment came through as I was replying... Thank you, Fern_of_the_woods, I value your encouragement, very much :bows: And also, thank you very much for asking for clarity. It has been very cleansing and healing to share this here, tonight. And it is because of you that I have had this honour.
 
W

weaver

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I also thought your answer was very detailed, and very honest. Please have compassion for yourself too - you see so clearly, and are so fearless in your search, but please be kind to yourself also. You are doing so well!
 

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