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Decision, and whether there is another question to ask

flashlight

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There is someone I would like to have come to my haven, who has never been here. The person is important to me and would be involved in settling my affairs should my health fail (that's another thread - oddly, preparing for the worst gives me peace of mind to focus on the best). My haven is the most important thing to me on the material plane (and has a huge positive impact on my spirit). I feel it is important this person know this place in order to be able to act in my place if that becomes necessary.

I asked the Yi "what do you think about my inviting this person here?". I know I am not supposed to, but I asked this question twice - once while I was multitasking (but still intent on the question) and later (several hours), when I was no longer multitasking and the question was still on my mind.

The first time, the Yi answered 19.4 to 54. The second time, Yi answered 49 unchanging.

Then I asked "how would it be best to invite X by phone?" - 64.6 to 40
And "how would it be best to invite X by email?" - 42.1.5 to 23.

I am too close to the topic to venture a translation, the whole context is too loaded for me. I'd be grateful for your takes on this, or whether there are other questions I should be asking about this.

:bows:
 

Trojina

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There is someone I would like to have come to my haven, who has never been here. The person is important to me and would be involved in settling my affairs should my health fail (that's another thread - oddly, preparing for the worst gives me peace of mind to focus on the best). My haven is the most important thing to me on the material plane (and has a huge positive impact on my spirit). I feel it is important this person know this place in order to be able to act in my place if that becomes necessary.

I asked the Yi "what do you think about my inviting this person here?". I know I am not supposed to, but I asked this question twice - once while I was multitasking (but still intent on the question) and later (several hours), when I was no longer multitasking and the question was still on my mind.

The first time, the Yi answered 19.4 to 54. The second time, Yi answered 49 unchanging.

Then I asked "how would it be best to invite X by phone?" - 64.6 to 40
And "how would it be best to invite X by email?" - 42.1.5 to 23.

I am too close to the topic to venture a translation, the whole context is too loaded for me. I'd be grateful for your takes on this, or whether there are other questions I should be asking about this.

:bows:
You mean is it best by phone or email ? Phone I'd think and sooner rather than later. To me it looks as if the answer will be a 'yes' and you will feel happy and released. I think s/he will also say yes by email but they will find it harder to understand your feelings about it that way...seeing the 23. I also wonder if they may be more upset for you by email. Remember you being so ill will make others sad and so on...not that this should be your problem, but I think you can make it easier for the person by talking to them. That way they experience you as you are right now...in writing we can kind of become objectified so to speak, be less real...people may not get what we mean and so on. Speaking is more reassuring.

19.4 is a lovely answer and 49uc too. If you feel this is right then have confidence , I think you can afford confidence anyway.


Of course I may be wrong...but I hope not

PS one caution in 64.6 is that in joy we can go a little OTT in some way...so if you feel really happy that's great but keep expectations grounded and so on. I even wonder, given the 64.6 if this person has already had the same thought as you about this and is expecting you to ask ? 19.4 makes me think s/he has already thought of this or at least that you should not delay and need to fully express your feelings/needs here.
 

flashlight

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Thanks Trojina (euh, double check, Trojan??), that's a wonderful answer - to a delicate question for me. I raised both the phone and email option because the person is near impossible to get on the phone and I am not keen on leaving messages which may or may not be listened to. Responded to or not, I know emails are received and read.
I do feel this is right, whether it comes to pass or not, and don't really have anything to lose in making the offer...
Anyone else want to chime in?? :)
 

flashlight

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Addendum Trojina... the advantage of email too is that no one is put on the spot... should the invite not be welcomed or perceived as a good idea, the person has leisure to punt. By phone, lest the idea is heralded as nifty as I think it is, the possibility exists that both parties might end up feeling awkward...
 

flashlight

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OK, I slept on it and sent the email this morning.

Then I asked Yi: I sent the message, what happens now?

I don't like its answer at all: 36.2.5.6 to 9....
 

Trojina

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Two questions

1. if you had already decided phoning was a bad idea why did you ask about it. I thought phoning was best because of the 23 as relating in the email option.

2. You sound nervous of this person, like you don't know or trust them very well. I'd imagined this was someone fairly close since you are asking them into a very personal area at this time.

I can't see what you are afraid of ?

Oh hang on just read your phone worries...well you could get around putting her on the spot by prefacing the request/invitation with "you don't have to answer me now but this is something to think about, let me know when you are ready". Email communication is dire for promoting misunderstanding IMO.

Anyway


OK, I slept on it and sent the email this morning.

Then I asked Yi: I sent the message, what happens now?

I don't like its answer at all: 36.2.5.6 to 9....
Why don't you like it ? It describes your action doesn't it. You are in a 36 place, you are injured and taking measures to rescue yourself (36.2), you are masking your feelings to some degree (36.5) and it won't be long till things reverse themselves...till you can 'come out' so to speak (36.6) Er didn't you get 36 also in you question about the prognosis and what to do for your health ....and so on. Relate that answer to this one....it's where you are. I think the 9 here just shows you waiting.

This is not a worrying answer IMO...but it does reflect the injured place you find yourself in, as anyone would with such illness. Does this action constitute a kind of 'coming out' for you in that you have sort of done a fair bit of concealing of the situation ?

The yang change pattern is 59 and the yin pattern 55. This confirms to me it is time to take action, to ask.
In which case you have done the right thing.
 

flashlight

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Trojan (argh, sorry Trojina) you are amazing. I had not made the 36 connection. In fact, I wouldn't have thought, had it dawned on me, that it would be an insightful thing to do (different question, different moment etc.). You are spot on. It resonates with me fully.

You make good arguments for phone rather than email. I had asked about phoning because I can be a spontaneous person, and when I have an idea, I like to get going with it. Sometimes that's good, sometimes not. But the person is really impossible to reach, which is frustrating, and I tend to express myself better through the written word. In any event, done deal.

No, not nervous of this person. Feeling fragile overall (sometimes about the stupidest things!), which is not great surprise. A bit apprehensive, in case the response were no (for whatever reason - timing, other plans, or not keen on the responsibility - it's not like this is a situation where one can guess the reaction based on passed behavior - can't and don't want to make assumptions).

Either way, the response will be useful.

Time to go do some weeding. That reconnects with the Earth real fast!

Thanks Trojina :hug:
 

Trojina

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Oh no ! That's awful...surely no one would just not respond ! I wonder if it's worth checking s/he got it ?

I mean you would have to be a pretty horrible person not to answer at all, not even to say "sorry I'm too busy" and I assume this person isn't such a low life as that, so what's happened I wonder.

I'm so sorry to hear this and sorry I thought it boded well. Is it like this person just to ignore you ? Do you think it's worth phoning ?
 

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Flashlight, you should have a will and an executor of your estate. The law does not repect informal arrangements. You have personalized your haven and cannot expect others to continue it as you have. I have made such decisions and arrangements for myself.
 

flashlight

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@Trojina - yeah, it stinks. Won't speculate as to why/whether the mail was received/read or not. Don't feel like trying to call (which is pot luck anyway). Will either ignore it wholly or deal with it at some point in the future in person when I've gained distance from it. Does kind of dovetail with the 36 to 9 I'd gotten though it seems.

@Pocossin. All that is long settled and done. Here, I was/am dealing with the interim when one can be in a situation where others have to act on your behalf if you can't yourself. Not the role of lawyers and their ilk.
 

pocossin

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@Pocossin. All that is long settled and done. Here, I was/am dealing with the interim when one can be in a situation where others have to act on your behalf if you can't yourself. Not the role of lawyers and their ilk.
I have already made an irrevocable power of attorney, perhaps prematurely, but my health was so bad four years ago that I did not expect to be here now. Once you are no longer in control, in my opinion you should gracefully relinquish control of your affairs. Do what you can now, and let the future take care of itself. There is no one who will take care of yard and garden as I have. I have a substantial collection of books. When my prospective executor asked what it to with them, I replied, "Take them to the dump." I have intellectual property and genetic improvement to plants that will go to waste on my passing. So be it. How can you expect anyone who is so difficult to contact to act on your behalf should you become incapacitated?
 

flashlight

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Do what you can now, and let the future take care of itself.
That is what I am doing. And overall, I'm doing pretty darn well!:stir:

How can you expect anyone who is so difficult to contact to act on your behalf should you become incapacitated?
That's a wise and logical point. However, in my experience, it is not necessarily the ones who are easy to reach/always soliciting/seemingly present who are the ones who follow through when the going really gets tough or there is a real emergency (which this was not). Sometimes they are. Sometimes it is those who, for whatever reason or in various ways, are more on the periphery. One example is a childhood friend I've rarely been in touch with in the past 3 or 4 decades. We live on opposite ends of the globe. Who is super mega present and helpful these days? That very pal who had always been unreliable, flaky but lovable nevertheless. So I'm suspending judgment, keeping a neutral mind and benefit of the doubt even if this non-response feels like crap.
 

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