Dragons flying- 1 to 2.

[yellowknife]

Crumbs, just unexpectedly got 1 changing into 2.
I was trying to figure out whether to ring someone or not or whether to wait for them to ring me. The above was the answer to what if I ring tomorrow. Certainly didn't expect all the lines to turn red. An almost visceral shock. I wanted to post here in case there's any special 1 to 2 wise words anyone's got...

It's a strange one as well.
At the moment I'm investigating my own life. I'm a detective sifting through old clues and half cold trails about...me.

Thirteen years ago I left a dysfunctional family with a much older man. To cut the book length story I increasingly feel I must write, short, we were separated, he ended up in prison for gun running, I stayed in love with him for years but went on to university and only saw him once more when he visited me saying he was on the run and I asked him never to contact me again. (I'd chosen stability and normality...but also, in choosing not to ask him more about what actually happened..denial. Which I'm now trying to overturn)

There's lots of things about my destructive family I half know but aren't sure of. After I left home accusations and counter acusations meant I didn't know what was real. My sister got in touch with me after thirteen years last year and we now are building a relationship. She confirmed that many of the things I thought were true. Somehow this has given me the confidence (and need) to tell my story. But first I need to uncover it.

I had a vivid dream about J, the man I left home with the other night. Now I've re read old diaries (and relived some of the feelings I had for him) and am wondering how much of what I intuited about him was real. How he became the person he did. I'm not wanting to track him down, I think he's probably dead, but it feels like I need to find out about him as one of the starting points for my book.

I have a number for a man I think he spent some of his crucial teen years with. I spoke to his colleague who said she'd get him to ring me back but so far..nothing. Though I am asking about someone he may not have seen for over forty years so he may think he has nothing to tell me.

Dragons flying...

 

[yellowknife]

Small update.
The man has now rung me back..wanted to be helpful but can't offhand remember who I'm talking about. Says he'll ring back if anything does come to mind.

So presumably the dragons might be referring more to the whole situation, the quest for information?

Food for thought.

 

[jerryd]

Picking up the pieces, place them into the pattern of a past life spent, the mosaic of time, memories clouded by loves unexplained lament.

Oh the moments of glory and the agony of fearful wondering, to what end? Today older and a bit wiser, I look at the road I have tred, not to find my way back but to see what is ahead.

Dare I who left these tracks scattered throughout valleys and mountains indulge my self in retevial just to weigh there value in todays economy? My fears swell and my mouth dries.

Yes I did find the need and the way but not without leaving a part of me alone, in today, isolated by my search and friendless in the dust of confusion I stur up.

I put my story into prows to see and saddened my life to some degree, enlightened my self to my ignorance, indulged in the happiness of a life ill spent.

Retrieved some answers to my reasoning then and applied it to now and some events. For me it changed nothing you see/ as what is my past is the person the me.


Here is the result of the meal(food) this served up for me. Just a few lines at randomtime.

time line/1980 to 1994

 

[dobro p]

"Crumbs, just unexpectedly got 1 changing into 2.
I was trying to figure out whether to ring someone or not or whether to wait for them to ring me. The above was the answer to what if I ring tomorrow."

Aw, c'mon - how often do you get Hex 1 morphing into Hex 2? Phone him and report back.

(BTW, you know about the seventh line for Hex 1 when you get all nines, right? The valuation for the situation is 'fortunate'.)

 

[jte]

I don't have special insight into 1 to 2 to share, Wolverine, but it sounds like you're reaching a major turning point in your project and/or life in some way.

The significance of it could be due to the fact that this is a family-related issue/project. After all family is, for good or ill, such a fundamental part of who we are.

- Jeff

 

[candid]

A few nights ago I received hex. 1 w/ 1 through 5 changing. It was a night of intense creative energy, and I was goin nuts figuring a way to deal with it. Fortunately my neighbors live a fair distance and so I cranked up my amp and took it out on my poor Strat. The relating hex. was 23, so I was able to let go of the excess energy this way.

I suppose if the 6th line changed too, I wouldn?t have known what to do about it, having no head/mind to guide me. So 1 w/all lines changing is a bit like a dragon eating its tail, consuming himself. Once that cycle plays itself out, there?s no mind left. Which is kinda nice, being 2.

 

[heylise]

I got 1 changing to 2 once, when I wanted to know how to deal with a very creative man. I wanted to accomplish something, which needed his approval, and at that moment I could not figure out what 1 to 2 meant. Later, looking back, it was simple: "this man is way too creative for the very normal, very common, sensible thing I wanted. Forget it. If I can accept things the way they are, I will learn the valuable lesson of moving along with the flow of the time, to accept, to submit to the way nature makes things happen".
I did learn that lesson, but if I had understood 1 to 2 back then, I would have had less trouble to.

So I think it means to forget about finding out things of the past: live your life the way it is, accept it the way it naturally grows. Then you will create the most valuable and most natural life possible. Creating is done towards the future, not from out the past.

The combination of highest creativity and deepest yielding is incredibly strong. Together they are Life itself.

LiSe

 

[yellowknife]

Thanks so much all.

I decided to sit with this one a little, since the situation changed not long after the throw because the man rang me back, and your words have really made me think.

I love your poem Jerryd. The idea of leaving yourSelf lonely while searching out a past Self is a powerful image.

Candid's and Lise's thoughts on intense creativity hit home. Particularly Lise as you described how it wasn't was needed in your situation at the time.

I realised that in looking at J's past, although I'd no doubt make all sorts of exciting connections and creative parallels, I'd be losing the point of what I'm doing, by getting embroiled in a fertile creative process (the reconstruction of his life) which isn't actually relevant to me.

The point of what I'm starting now is actually to tell my story. To have my story heard. Something I've realised in counselling and creative processes (and difficulties) over the last year is an increasingly important urge, for all sorts of reasons. Not in order to go back and wallow in the past, but to help towards building a congruent, whole, integrated Self for the future.

I asked what I needed to bear in mind while writing my story and got 44 unchanging. Hmm. Gently penetrating the Creative.

I also asked how I would benefit from telling my story and got 16 unchanging.

I had been trying to think of the right questions to ask about this process and think those might be useful..once I've got my head round them!

Blessings
Wolverine

 

[candid]

Sounds like you've got your dragon head back, Wolverine, and squarely on your shoulders. I also like your comment on 44: "Gently penetrating the Creative." Although more correctly it is the creative that penetrates and impregnates the maiden. Same result though, the creative made manifest through the maiden, or as LiSe puts it: to beget an heir.

 

[Arosban]

And again, though not so in my face, I am inclined to believe that I have been the undeserved victim of a joke of which I appear to be hub to. My last posted reply, should suitably cover the matter with greater passion and distress. Thanks anyway. Hope you meet with compassion more appropriate to a future of normal human expectancies if u ever ha e the misfortune to encounter a world that is not unlike the one which I presently exist.