friendship question?

[kdedeaux4]

A dear friend of mine really confused me this weekend. We have spent lots of time together lately and I really think highly of her as a person and felt we were developing a really nice friendship... We had plans for this weekend to spend time together and it just seemed strange. I felt like she was continuously putting me down in subtle ways. She has never behaved like this toward me before, so the first few side comments that jabbed, my initial though was, "gosh, I'm just being too sensitive" and of course, I just ignored them and let them pass by. After this continued for sometime, I finally realized it couldn't possibly be happening so often and be my imagination entirely...but I just continued to ignore them.... and just wondering why this was happening. Tried to discuss with her and *really* regretted that, as it felt as though she just turned the whole thing around on me and I actually ended up apologizing to her for reasons I still don't really know why, but for the sake of keeping peace and valuing a friendship, I figured I should pick my battles... So Saturday while we were together, it started happening again and I was just too frustrated to deal with it anymore, so I called her out on it and stood my ground. Well, she doesn't see that she's done anything and I'm not going to apologize again for not wanting to take jabs at my friends trivial enjoyment (?? )... really, just don't get it at all, as she has never treated me like this before and I am hurt and sad...and confused.... we haven't spoken since Sat. evening....
Asked IC what's going on with my friend and for insight into why she was treating me like that...
Response: hex 56.1.3.6 to hex 51.
Some of these lines seem to directly relate to this. Trivial concerns...I did try to ignore it hoping it would cease...but one can only take that for so long before thinking something deeper is prompting this out of the blue like that...
Any thoughts on this? I'd very much like to understand better and now how to handle this !
Namaste':bows:

 

[patro]

hi kdedeaux4,
I experienced in the past that when I make a question that is composed by 2 parts like yours where the second is depending from the first part.... the IC is answering you with the first hex for the first part of the question and with the second hex for the second part of the question.
try to get the answer only reading the meaning of hexagrams and do not read the moving lines.
try this method, if you need help I'm here.
Patro

 

[willowfox]

Asked IC what's going on with my friend and for insight into why she was treating me like that...
Response: hex 56.1.3.6 to hex 51.

The lines do show her attempts at sarcasm, jabs or whatever you call it, and line 56.3 shows that you are fed up and backing off, but don't worry about it as it suggests that she will soon realize that she's gone too far.

I sense a touch of spitefulness in her actions, as she probably directly blames you for the "fight" a few weeks ago and this seems to be her childish response, the tit for tat thing. You hurt me so I'm going to poke you, sort of stuff.

Personally, i think you need to call her and tell her that this sort of silly behaviour is counterproductive, as you are trying to mend fences and she is only trying to seek revenge because she feels hurt by what happened in the past. Ask her, does she want to remain friends or not, and clearly point out to her what she was doing/saying.

 

[kdedeaux4]

Thank you for the advice on how to look at the hexagrams Patro! I very much appreciate new ways to interpret and perceive I's responses...I'm definitely still learning the basics in this wonderful method of reflection and insight!

Willowfox...you are right on here..it is sarcasm and hurtful little jabs...things I can ignore for quite awhile, but am realizing that ignoring them only served to bring them more, harder and more frequently, so that clearly wasn't a way to resolution
I have attempted another honest disclosure and addressing of this sudden occurrence and am hoping for the best, although I'm not feeling very confident that it's resolvable. I'm hoping WF that as is often the case, that you are correct about this and she might be willing to look at this honestly enough to see her behavior and maybe our friendship can survive and perhaps even grow because of this.... These kinds of difficult situations make me so very sad and terribly uncomfortable, as I see no reason to ever belittle or condescend a genuine friend. It's such a passive aggressive form of expressing resentments and impossible to resolve when the resentments aren't acknowledged or even understood
Thank you so much...I am hoping and praying this friendship grows from this unfortunate twist.
:bows::bows:

 

[patro]

hi,
I think about the 2 hexs and I have no good news for you!!!
I'm sorry...
is it possible that she might be jealous or envious about a mutual friend? new friends..work etc..? or is she linking to other?

hex 56: You must be cautious and discreet: to live well at the moment means not giving too much
confidence to people, while remaining available to the approaches of other.

hex 51: This hexagram stay also for gossip and litigation matters.

well if the answer to any of above questions is yes... well that' the answer why is going so.

Patro

 

[kdedeaux4]

jealousy

Patro,
I hate to think this, but truly the only logical explanation i can arrive at for her sudden change in attitude toward me is some type of jealousy.... and that's very sad because i don't know how to fix her jealousy. Maybe sometimes we just can't be too close with certain people?

"You must be cautious and discreet: to live well at the moment means
not giving too much confidence to people, while remaining available
to the approaches of other."

I really think you are absolutely right with this!! It's a very strong feeling I've been having lately that I need to learn to protect myself a bit more and be less open and giving of my heart to people... and still find the ability/balance to still remain somewhat open for positive friendships and people to come into my life.
I think you are very insightful and accurate about this situation and I thank you for your insight and reflection!
Namaste':bows: