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Goodbye's and bitter people

kdedeaux4

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(...Big sigh...) Again I'm here asking for interpretation advice...:blush: and I apologize in advance for my lengthy description surrounding this reading!!

I have attempted a final resolution on all issues surrounding a relationship which is very dear to my heart. I've said goodbye in as peaceful and loving way as I know how while still maintaining my truth and sincerity: a card and letter filled with gratitude for all things beautiful and encouragement, while also setting firm boundaries (unfortunately, the boundaries part was NOT my favorite part, but very necessary in these circumstances). Wishing I could feel content with that and not worry and fret needlessly over whether it was the correct choice/action. Action done. Choice made. Boundary set. Right?:confused:

Sensing all sorts of negative energies. Overwhelming actually.... and I'm frustrated that even my kindest and most sincere attempts at establishing peaceful acceptance feels surrounded by others in bitterness and hateful intention. As though nothing I do at this point will be considered anything positive, no matter how sincere my emotions. It's beyond my control and it shouldn't matter, but this situation was sabotaged by others (not he nor I, but "others" altogether) from the very beginning. After everything, it's painful to try to just accept that no amount of pure intent or sincerity might overcome the senseless and hateful negativity others have submerged this entire situation in! Anyway... looking for hope and encouragement regarding my choices, I asked IC:

What energies currently surround the letter I sent? Hexagram 45, lines 2 and 6 changing to hexagram 6. Yes, this makes sense of the gut feelings I've been getting and fighting. Not encouraging, no, but validating, YES...

So, this situation being so very close to my heart, I then asked, What is beyond this negativity? Hexagram 58, lines 4 and 5, changing to 19.
Well, it seems this is some encouragement that my sincerity might not be totally lost in this situation. Or am I just reading into it what I want to see?

I would be ever grateful for as much insight and interpretation with these two readings as the kindness of those wiser (and more subjective!) are willing to offer:)

As always, I'm so grateful for the kindness you all offer in taking your time to read, help, and respond. Gosh, life's big lessons and experiences sure can be difficult and overwhelming! The guidance I've received through IC and the wonderfully wise people here has been such a blessing through this painful struggle.
:bows:
 

willowfox

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The lines talk about the attraction that exists between the two of you, and therefore there is no need to say too much but your letter may cause him to see the situation differently and to realize what has happened. Yes, the letter will cause him conflict and inner turmoil.

Hexagram 58, lines 4 and 5, changing to 19. The lines suggests that once you understand that any passionate cravings that you have for this person only will continue to cause you pain and suffering, then you can find peace by releasing those feelings. Also, you have mistakenly associated with the wrong people who have messed everything up for you, so now that you see them for what they are, protect yourself against them and then they can't harm you anymore. Then you can look forward to a fruitful and successful period ahead.
 

kdedeaux4

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Willowfox:)
As always, your insight is impeccable! This has been a long, painful lesson/experience for me in "associating with the wrong people", as well as a harsh lesson in blind optimism and loyalty to not-very-nice people, and an innocent (childish?) faith in "love can conquer all". I have cleaned house per se of those people, but the effects of their damage and ill-will have lingered longer than I ever could have imagined possible!! It's been an uphill battle with knives and the most vicious of lies and sheer ugliness I have ever experienced. At this point, I think lessons in the nature of people are often the most painful of all:-( I pray that they are also the most enduring, as another one like this might just do me in!

Anyway, you are such a dear to be helpful to so many looking for insight on here and I always look forward (and hope for) your wise and intuitive wisdom. You are a precious and valuable soul:)
Thank you so very much!!
 

em ching

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Hi, I just want to say i can totally relate to how you feel here...
I don't know the gravity of the situation or how bad the people you came into contact with were, but I can completely relate to the 'blind optimism' you have - I find it very hard to see the bad in people until there's a final show that I can't deny...

What I have found helpful in dealing with not so nice people, is to ignore those aspects of them and remain true to your conviction to be good and not fall in with them... bullies are just cowards who need to stick together and pick on those who they are threatened by, and once you see that and ignore it, or at least Not let them make you feel you have brought it on yourself, it seems to magially dissappear... Your reaction to the bullies, or showing them your vulnerabitiy and hurt opens yourself up to more, so just rise yourself to a level above them where you know you belong, and seek and encourage good people more... though I think I have been guilty of letting people get away with stuff before - definitely important to Stand up for yourself.. But I think if you don't let bullies affect your pride, they'll let you be..

I hope that comes across helpfully, I know this is all well and good in theory but difficult when your in the midst of bad feeling - but rising above it has worked for me - just bear in mind that the massess can be stupid (especially if you let them be)!
 
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kdedeaux4

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Thank you!

Hi Em Ching,

Although I'd never wish my experience on any other person, it's sure nice to know I'm not the only one naive enough to make this kind of mistake. It's nice to hear someone might actually understand this type of situation and how harmful it can be.
I can truly say these people's influence has drastically altered the path of my life and adversely affected the relationships which were most dear to me. It's been awhile now since the worst of it happened, but I'm learning that some people never stop hating (is that even what it is?) when you choose to walk away from them. They must want to try to ensure I suffer forever. A few years isn't long enough I suppose.

Yes, I've chosen to completely disassociate myself from them at all cost and the lingering effects are coming from the man I still somewhat have kept in my life who still chooses to be strongly influenced by the others. I'm learning to accept that maybe that association has to go too. He is a good person and it's hard to accept their influence and bitterness has lasted this long, not to mention that he still chooses to allow them to BE an influence. Painful and sad.... but I'm trying to keep the faith that things have to eventually clear up!!
Your kind words are very encouraging and I'm grateful for your compassion and understanding.
Thank you! ~Namaste~
Krista
 

em ching

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Namaste! Tapailai casto cha? :)

Well from the answers it seems to be saying that you do have a positive connection with one of them which should be maintained - perhaps if they sense he is nicer and has integrity, and so different from the others, they might start picking on him... so perhaps you should continually support him...

In my experience this kind of bullying happens in groups, with a strong atmosphere of I will only show you respect and acceptance if you 'up' my status in return in some way... they obviously feel themselves inadequate and are putting you down to elevate themselves... classic... but one day this group won't be able to hide behind each other... It's also sad that good people do get sucked in, and by association it's hard to trust them if they keep compnay with idiots, but I think they are probably just more passive and also want to see the good and get along with everyone... though if he were joining in on the bullying, or laughing along, then any integrity and goodness goes out the window - that is being cowardly...

So if you suspect that of him then maybe you should dissasociate yourself, but if he seems to genuinely care about you then he shoud realise it too and perhaps start moving away from the bad crowd... hopefully :)

But make sure you keep in mind that you are showing bravery by not conforming to their ways... Independence and self-belief :) and there are pleanty of good people out there you don't need them in any way shape or form! Let them have the last laugh... ultimately, it is on them anyway.
Hope you can put them behind you very soon!

Namaste
:bows:
 

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