Growth potential for relationship

[snowglobed]

I would like some help interpreting a reading. I asked what would happen if I move in with a close friend. I like my current housing situation but the couple I live with is pregnant and could really use the space. When I told my friend I thought I should offer to move out, she mentioned the room in her house that will soon be available. Here is the background of our relationship: we initially met in a romantic context but have been friends for several years, sometimes close, other times distant. This year it felt like we were more dating than anything but I was a bit afraid to go anywhere with it (she was not). I shine so brightly in her eyes and that self is still a bit scary to me, and I wonder if she mistakes my reserve for rejection. Well, this friend is getting older and she would really like to have someone to settle down and have kids with (like 5 years ago), but her relationships don't work out. Last year she almost out of the blue asked me if I would raise a kid with her, and I demurred. Now she is actively trying to conceive on her own. I would enjoy living with her, but I don't know if I necessarily want to rent out a room in her house, to bring the element of money into our relationship (also it's quite a bit more expensive than my current situation for quite a bit less). IDK anything about the romantic or longevity potential of our relationship at this point, but I do care about her.

The hexagram I cast was 28.1.5 > 34. 28 seems to say that the situation is flawed, and it is best to move. The fifth line is interesting! "An old woman gets a young husband. No blame, no praise." I am certainly not young (or male), but I am several years younger than my friend and she has hinted at wanting a wife.

A couple months ago I asked about this relationship and received 48.2.5 > 15. 48 is The Well, it says that we are not taking advantage of the depth that is available. I feel like I have always been searching and searching for something, undetermined (e.g. should I pursue this or that career, schooling, location, etc.). Around the time I received this reading I realized it could be so much easier if I just eased into being myself, if I stopped struggling and wanting so much and started being happy with everything I have. And that relaxation brought such immense happiness to my life and things felt like they were falling right into place. But I feel myself slipping into my old habits, wasting time not drawing on the depth of love and wisdom that is available to me. My relationship with my friend has always been a bit superficial because I'm just not diving into it.

So, woo, that is a lot! Any insight?

 

[rosada]

28.1 accentuates the importance of being extremely careful. Sounds like a great deal of sensitivity will be required as there is a lot more going on here than simply coming to a rental agreement.
28.5 is very positive for a good partnership but there is the thought that this "marriage" does not produce children. I wonder if there is a reference here to the fact your friend would like to have a child? Perhaps the lines are saying that the arrangement would work out if your friend does not have a child but that if she continues to try to conceive and if she does bring a child into this world, this might cause your arrangement to Collapse. Certainly living in a home with a newborn makes you a part of this little one's "family" and thus - like it or not - you will be raising a child together.

 

[Trojina]

The hexagram I cast was 28.1.5 > 34. 28 seems to say that the situation is flawed, and it is best to move. The fifth line is interesting! "An old woman gets a young husband. No blame, no praise." I am certainly not young (or male), but I am several years younger than my friend and she has hinted at wanting a wife.

So to clarify that was the answer to this question

I would like some help interpreting a reading. I asked what would happen if I move in with a close friend.

I don't think it says the situation is flawed. 28 would indicate there is a real pressure for you to take action, which there is, you need to move out. I think 28 here might also indicate the weight of the decision or maybe the weight of the relationship, it needs to morph into something else becasue it's become top heavy so to speak. Looking at the 2 hexagrams as a sentence 'Great Exceeding's Great Strength' that's a pretty robust combination. I think this relationship is something that is pretty solidly there (34) if you try to push it over it won't fall down and yet 28 shows a roof about to break. It looks to me like a picture of a person about to cave in, but not in a bad way. You have to move and possibly may have to formalize the relationship or decide what it is ? If deciding what it is forces you out on a limb somewhat (28) I don't think that will hurt you (34)

A couple months ago I asked about this relationship and received 48.2.5 > 15. 48 is The Well, it says that we are not taking advantage of the depth that is available. I feel like I have always been searching and searching for something, undetermined (e.g. should I pursue this or that career, schooling, location, etc.). Around the time I received this reading I realized it could be so much easier if I just eased into being myself, if I stopped struggling and wanting so much and started being happy with everything I have. And that relaxation brought such immense happiness to my life and things felt like they were falling right into place.

Yes I think that is best kept secret to happiness and why older people are often happier than young people. When time runs shorter one realizes every single experience is unique, there won't ever be another today and also, you are right, as soon as you become happy, apreciate what is there then life just becomes a lot better. I think one feature of youth is being tortured by the idea that things could really be so much better if only things were different. What you say about this fits perfectly with 15. In 15 we work with the reality of what is there. I think the lines in 48 probably show a progression here. In line 2 there's no solid container or form for the relationship and this means a lot is wasted. By line 5 the water of the well is easily reached.

But I feel myself slipping into my old habits, wasting time not drawing on the depth of love and wisdom that is available to me. My relationship with my friend has always been a bit superficial because I'm just not diving into it.

So, woo, that is a lot! Any insight?

I think you have answered your own questions. I have the sense the more you commit to the relationship the less 'waste' as in 48.2 you experience.

Going back to 28. I think line 1 would show taking very great care over the arrangements of living together. Line 5, since it actually says there are flowers but no new shoots, ie no children could well be literal. Perhaps she will change her mind about having a baby. This is a line where you enjoy things for what they are, you aren't looking to have children the relationship is enough. However it may not be literal.

If you don't want to get closer to her disregard what i said about making the relationship more formal. I did feel a lot of ambiguity in your post as if you wanted more with her yet didn't quite say it.

I think these are both reasonable casts for moving in with her.