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Hexagram 48-Unchanging

cristal

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I asked what was the insigh for me and the man I love. He deals with huge emotional issues, now we just fought because he had another person in his life ,a close friend. But not anymore. But he does not talk to me now. He needs therapy before relating to anybody, I am wondering if its right for me to try to push him to go to Therapy whilst every says I should leave him as he is. but I see him unhappy and misleading everybody including himself in hi search of what he misses insight,

I got Hexagram 48 no changing lines when I asked about insight, what does it means?

Thank you
 
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Trojina

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I asked what was the insigh for me and the man I love. He deals with huge emotional issues, now we just fought because he had another person in his life ,a close friend. But not anymore. But he does not talk to me now. He needs therapy before relating to anybody, I am wondering if its right for me to try to push him to go to Therapy whilst every says I should leave him as he is. but I see him unhappy and misleading everybody including himself in hi search of what he misses insight,

I got Hexagram 48 no changing lines when I asked about insight, what does it means?

Thank you

I don't know about the reading but how can you decide if he needs therapy...or even if he had it that it would help your relationship ? It may just as easily make him realise he needs to be alone...or withthe other person or whatever.

My opinion is you are better off taking your attention away from thinking you can get him 'fixed' .....(therapy won't fix him so hes the person you want him to be) and pay more attention to yourself and why you are continuing on in this relationship that doesn't give you what you want.


You can only fix you you can't fix him nor decide if he should have therapy

48 shows a continuous resource that all can come to get what is needed but if we don't have the means, the rope is too short or the pitcher is broken we won't get what we need we can't access it.


Could see it as the love and good relationship you need is always there but you have no means of accessing it with this person, hes not available to you, you say hes not talking to you.

In short its just not your decision if he has therapy or not so you can only focus on what you want to do for yourself here.
 

cristal

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Thank you, I do not understand very much the relationship of the hexagram to my question, I thought it could be, I should nourish him till he gets the courage/strenght to understand he needs a professional.

In regard to his therapy, I am a psychologist, so I know he needs therapy.
I know that aloneness is the first step, but he is unable to be alone, he runs away from aloneness, he feels a terrible depression when is alone, then he cant start with aloneness .

The why I am with him? Because I love him. And we fell in love at first sigh, that means you do not have idea who is the person towards who you feel that lucky feeling that is love. That kind of feeling does not go when you find out the person is ill, for me love towards my partner it has the same strenght than the one towards my dad or my kids. I would not leave them because they can't treat me how I want., knowing they do that because they are emotionally ill, I would try them to go to somebody that help them professionally and hoping that help our relationship to grow.

I wish , when you love somebody , would be so easy to leave him because he does not give me what I want. It is not and it does not depend on self esteem, it is love, you cant leave behind somebody you love even if they dont love you in same healthy way you do.

What I cant do, is giving him a therapy, it must be somebody that is not related to him, and the only I can is to push him but I feel that because our connection, doing like this I hurt his self esteem and thats why he searches for other women that flatter him and then after a short period of time, he leaves them.

However I just knew he is not anymore with this woman.

I decided I will read the iching morning and night, to see how the situation is evolving.

Thank you for your kind post, that hexagram seem so beautiful that I was tempted to believe that maybe something could be solved if I keep nourishing him trying him to see the need for him to take care of himself, and yes when we relate with somebody unhealthy we become at least a bit unhealthy ourselves, then we need to be more aware of how we are dealing with our own self.

I will read the Iching again, to see how is evolving my relationship with him

Thank you
 

Trojina

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What I cant do, is giving him a therapy, it must be somebody that is not related to him, and the only I can is to push him but I feel that because our connection, doing like this I hurt his self esteem and thats why he searches for other women that flatter him and then after a short period of time, he leaves them.

However I just knew he is not anymore with this woman.

I decided I will read the iching morning and night, to see how the situation is evolving.

Thank you for your kind post, that hexagram seem so beautiful that I was tempted to believe that maybe something could be solved if I keep nourishing him trying him to see the need for him to take care of himself, and yes when we relate with somebody unhealthy we become at least a bit unhealthy ourselves, then we need to be more aware of how we are dealing with our own self.

I will read the Iching again, to see how is evolving my relationship with him

Thank you

My answer was much influenced by my opinion, only my opinion so I can't claim the I Ching says this or this with 48 unchanging for sure because it may be interpreted a number of ways including yours

Though I don't think the answer says you should keep nourishing him because from my limited perspective you are fostering something quite unhealthy for yourself by telling yourself he goes with other women because he is ill . Oh and I would expect hexagram 27 more for nourishment though I guess it could also be 48 yes

However I don't really know how it is so I'm only responding to how it seems.

I don't think anyone should have therapy if they don't want it..
 

cristal

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Thank you, I wasnt sure where I have to put the next reading so I put it in another thread.

Yes, I am also confused about insisting if he does not want it. But unfortunately the need it is, I am afraid for him.

I dont want to describe things, it is a real need.

Yes, I probably should leave him alone. Because he is a mature man.


About going with other women because he is emotionally ill, it is a reality. It is also hard to explain here. Too difficult to explain beyond that because it is quite private. What I can say, it is not something I am making it up to myself.
 
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louie

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The Well

I would like to know how this progressed. I am in a very similar situation at the moment.

My intuitive feelings interprets this as : we are the place where people gather and find nourishment. The well does not sacrifice itself when it gives of it's water. It also does not move. Sometimes maybe we just need to love someone - without any expectation or attachment and in that, find our worth and they, their healing. Without feeling "love", we may not even be aware that we need to do it.

Without attachment, is the hardest part. Staying healthy, clear and still, makes this hard.
 

cornucopia

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I would like to know how this progressed. I am in a very similar situation at the moment.

My intuitive feelings interprets this as : we are the place where people gather and find nourishment. The well does not sacrifice itself when it gives of it's water. It also does not move. Sometimes maybe we just need to love someone - without any expectation or attachment and in that, find our worth and they, their healing. Without feeling "love", we may not even be aware that we need to do it.

Without attachment, is the hardest part. Staying healthy, clear and still, makes this hard.

The message is very clear. If you want to benefit from this source of love, inspiration energy whatever this person means for you....he/she must be accessible and in good working order. Only then can you draw the benefits you both want from each other and be an unlmited source of nourishment for each other. In both cases the person in question cannot fulfill your needs. You can only reach out so far (if the bucket rope breaks or cannot reach the bottom to get to the source of nourishment or breaks it is misfortune for both.)
 
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louie

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Thank you. That resonates accurately for me at the moment.
 

ariel13

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Cristal,
I know I am really late on this reading...and don't know how it transpired or if you are still around. But I have to say that I understand what you are saying when you say that he is sick, so he does certain things.. And because you are a psychologist, you understand those things to be a result of his illness. But I think you have to take a step back (if you haven't already). I have a close family member who has passed but was mentally ill. I loved her with all my heart but at some point had to recognize that I needed to take care of myself– that I couldn't heal her. I'm sure this is more complicated with you b/c you make a living as a healer, but then comes the real question– don't you deserve unconditional love also? And isn't it fair for you to protect yourself and leave your healing to your profession? There is likely something inside of you that needs healing– otherwise you would not seek out someone who hurts you so. My suggestion would be to use some of your professional training and knowledge to look inward (but don't overthink it) just nourish yourself and give him a referral. I know it's tough. I was very close to the family member of mine that was ill, but at some point you have to do what is best for you.

Hope everything turned out well.

All the best,
Jen
 

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