Hexagram 8 to 29 help please !!

[Celeryeatscucumber]

Hi

I have asked the question. "If I work on myself, Is there a chance that me and my expartner can reunite and create a beautiful longlasting relationship"

We were together 4 years and are currently on a break, meeting again in few months to see how we feel.
I am deeply in love with him, and don't know whether to let it go or to work on myself in preperation for trying again.

This reading is confusing, as the 29 is clearly not a good sign, but the changing line is positive. some help would be greatly appreciated !! Thankyou so much xxxx

 

[Celeryeatscucumber]

I should add for clarity that the changing line of hexagram 8 is two

 

[rosada]

8.2 Hold to him inwardly.
This certainly sounds to me like you are being encouraged to maintain your inner connection with your friend.
As to whether this will lead to the relationship you envision I think 29 warns you should anticipate a long stretch of treading lightly, like walking on water. Perhaps this refers to the work you plan to do on yourself. 29 talks about the need for a wise teacher. Perhaps working on yourself means more than just doing a few things you think would be helpful. Perhaps you are being encouraged to take a class, find a guru, really engage in a process of evolving to your best self. whether this ultimately brings the two of you back together it sounds like it's still worth doing it for you.

 

[Celeryeatscucumber]

Thankyou very much for your interpretation. It is very helpful ! It is a strange reading isn't it !

 

[Celeryeatscucumber]

If anyone else has an interpretation for this I would greatly appreciate it xx

 

[diamanda]

If I work on myself, Is there a chance that me and my expartner can reunite and create a beautiful longlasting relationship? 8.2 > 29

29 means repeated danger. What was it that broke you up in the first place?
Whatever it was, 29 says that it will come back.
In this light, I can see three possible interpretations:

a) If the break-up was due to a fault in yourself, then "holding to him inwardly" only will not solve the issue. So by all means don't just rely on love, work on yourself and change what the fault was - because if you rely on love alone, the problem will come back.

or b) You do have real love for him, so the fault doesn't lie within yourself. The problem then lies with him, hence it will come back no matter what you do.

or c) The problem was that you two stayed indoors too much, so if you continue to do that, the original problem will resurface. (a bit far-fetched I know, but I thought I'd cover all 'linguistic' possibilities)

 

[Celeryeatscucumber]

Thanks so much Diamanda !! We broke up because I was very insecure throughout our relationship, causing stress between us. In the last year he began to grow distant and non commital, saying he was tired of issues all the time. I have faults to heal for sure, I guess i don't know that if I heal those insecurities whether his dstance and non commitedness would go away....

 

[Celeryeatscucumber]

We still love eachother, but he grew tired. So yes indeed, it could be a) or b) ....not sure about c) !x

 

[diamanda]

I agree, insecurity is not good, mainly because it clouds your judgement and makes you blame yourself for everything. I Ching and love apart, I would suggest that you take a good and clear look at all the episodes that made you feel insecure in the past with him. For example, did he show any signs that he's flirty with other ladies? Did he show at any point disrespect, or indifference, or whatever else negative? Nevermind what he said, words are easy - think back at his actions, and assign blame where blame really belongs.

If his actions were impeccable and consistently loving, with no trace of anything suspicious, then your insecurity is based on illusory paranoia of some sort. In which case it would be good to address this and find what is the root cause of it.

And back to the I Ching: if you simply just love him, the problem will come back.

 

[Celeryeatscucumber]

Yes, I hear you. He was impeccable though, which is the painful part. I was carrying paranoia from a past relationship.
So do you think, the reading suggests there is a chance, if what is the reoccuring problem is dealt with?

 

[diamanda]

Your question was about improving yourself, and the reading mentioned nothing about improving yourself or correcting your faults or being at fault.

On top of that, 29 advises that when a danger re-occurs, we need to act with sincerity, do what our heart tells us to do. Not only the answer doesn't say "you were paranoid and imagining things", I think it actually says the opposite. There was a danger there, you felt it, you reacted sincerely and out of love. I do hear what you said, that it was paranoia on your part, but I just can't see that anywhere in the answer.

 

[SHONNA_D]

Any update?