...life can be translucent

Menu

How is he paying for the pain he's caused me?

ginnie

Supporter
Clarity Supporter
Joined
Dec 2, 2008
Messages
4,342
Reaction score
12
Well, this is a loaded question indeed.

You have gotten line 64.3, which is a line that has puzzled many people. In one sentence it says not to advance, but to cross the great river. So, what could be the meaning of that? It is certainly contradictory. I think it means that whatever is done will have to be done over later, because something is not right.

You have also gotten line 64.6, which is a general warning against behaving in an immoderate way.

:)
 

kincadefoster

visitor
Joined
Dec 14, 2013
Messages
180
Reaction score
0
I've never really understood 64. But I've gotten it a few times before and it seems to mean, the future is not set, things haven't fully formed, nothing is everything and everything is nothing.

Line 3 talks about finishing one thing(relationship?) before starting another, and 6 seems to say it's fun to get together and have fun/party/drink/laugh but some people need to be careful not to get too drunk because they can't hold their sh** and either act in a shameful way or get angry or something like that. It may refer to a figurative drunkenness rather than an actual drunkenness.

It changes to 32, which can either mean an enduring union(the planets align) or things stay as they are.

My gut tells me right now to ask, are you sure this "pain he caused you" was onesided? You don't have to answer on here, but look within and ask yourself. I don't know anything of your story except what I have been given: that someone caused you pain, so I may be wrong?
 

fatequeen

visitor
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
61
Reaction score
0
I'll try to be as brief as possible. I met him online where I had stated in my profile I was looking for a relationship, no booty calls. We really hit it off and started seeing quite a bit of each other. After the second time we slept together he asked me if I ever had a threesome and later when I told him I lived with a female roommate asked if she was as cute as me. I was taken aback. I told him I hadnt and wasn't interseted. He brought it up 2 more times and also married friends he has that have an open marriage to which I kinda lost my **** the last time. He said "OK OK I'll never bring it up again! God its just sex!" I told him I didnt think we were on the same page and broke it off the next day. He sounded very upset and said "I cant believe youre dumping me because I talked about a sexual fantasy!" I said "Look I want a relationship but it doesnt sound like you do." He said "I never said that... I am open to one and if I really wanted a 3-way I would have had one by now. I'm not even resubscribing my dating account."

I took him back. He hadnt been on the dating site for about 10 days prior to this conversation but 2 days later I logged in to show a friend his pic and saw he had been online that day. I logged in the next day and he had been on again. I was down the next night and he asked what was wrong. I told him I had seen him on the site. He said he had gotten notification of a message followed with "Look you dont own me and I dont own you" I said "I dont want to OWN anyone.. I thought we had an agreement" He said "Checking messages on a dating site is not cheating!"

We continued to date a while more but one day discussing when we would get together next he texted me what seemed to me to be a response to someone else about a different night. I freaked and asked what he meant. There was a more than usual text pause in his next few texts and he indicated he meant the night we were getting together into the next said day (but that could have meant just the next morning as we said I would stay over and he had to work the next day).

We saw each other the next night. He didnt text me at all the next day of the questionable night which was very out of character for him. I freaked and ended up driving by his place after when I know he gets home to see if he was going out right after (he gets home around 8:00pm). He texted me he just got home and had forgotten his phone at home that day. I didnt respond for 30 mins to see if he would leave soon. The he called. I picked and he asked what I was up to. I lied and said I was doing some errangs... I didnt know he had seen me. He said he saw me and was pissed and told me it was over and said I would have never seen him leave no matter how late I drove by.

The next day I told him I was very sorry and asked him to forgive me not even expecting a response. He responded “I do. But I cant do a relationship with you anymore.. at least not for a while. No more sleepovers. If you want to do just sex I can do that and maybe someday we can revisit the relationship idea again. Honestly I dont want to look for sex with anyone else and I guess I will just be spending the little free time I have by myself if you're not interested” (he works full-time and is going to school for his masters)

I finally agreed thinking at least we would still be monogamous. We saw each other again but the very next day I saw him logged into the dating site for hours and then again the next few nights. I texted him one day shortly after “I cant do the sex only thing anymore. If you dont think you can pursue a relationship with me ever again, can you please let me know so I can let this go” He responded “Sorry I cant do a relationship with you at this time. I cant have a relationship with someone who doesnt trust me. It will suck not to see you anymore but I understand your position.” I asked him to please give me another chance like I had given him another chance. He said “when? When I opened up to you about a fantasy?? I was not bullshitting you. You on the other hand invaded my privacy and lied to me. You dont trust me” I told him he was not the most reassuring guy on the planet and said I wasnt even sure he hadnt lied to me and mentioned questionable text and times he had been on dating site after saying he would be monogamous and asked why if he knew he couldnt ever trust me again why he kept saying he couldnt be in a realtionship with me AT THIS TIME. He never responded.

I am devistated.
 
Last edited:

kincadefoster

visitor
Joined
Dec 14, 2013
Messages
180
Reaction score
0
First of all, I know it's tempting to check up on people when they are acting suspicious. However, going to his house, not a good idea. Checking leads to more checking and then we end up in a mental state and it's better to trust on principle even if it means later you will find out something happened. Because in the end, someone can cheat and you will never know, so it's up to them to be honest with you, and there's no point in thinking about it way too much. And sometimes when you feel you can't trust someone, it's really because they're not trustworthy.

Second, If he really liked you, he wouldn't want a threesome, you would be special to him and he would want to be selfish with you.

I suspect you will hear from him again, and you need to be strong. Know who you are and what you want and don't settle for anything less! Clearly for you sex and monogamy/exclusivity go together so no sex without it. I recommend you find a man who isn't dishonest about being on a dating site, though.
 

Trojina

Supporter
Clarity Supporter
Joined
May 29, 2006
Messages
19,974
Reaction score
234
This is just a really bad question

How is he paying for the pain he's caused me?



I got 64:3,6
How he's paying for whatever he did isn't something you can know. You can't view another person's karma and also it is irrelevant to you because what you need to know is how to look after you, never mind him. I suggest making your questions about yourself...but the question you asked IMO won't get any kind of straight answer anyone could understand ,....and afterall what is the point of asking that since you'll never know how he's 'paying for it'. How he is 'paying for it' isn't your business, it is way out of the realm of your control. Why would you ask this question...are you hoping for some full on vengeance or something ? Wrong oracle for that.
 

Trojina

Supporter
Clarity Supporter
Joined
May 29, 2006
Messages
19,974
Reaction score
234
Also it isn't even clear what answer you got ? You wrote 64.3>6 well 64.3 changes to 50 so did you mean you got 64.3.6>32 ?

No point giving input if no one knows what answer you got.

Always apply your answer to yourself before anyone else as IMO Yi's answers will always be primarily for you. So how do you think the answer applies to you ? You've said nothing about the answer...and we don't even know what it is anyway .
 
G

goddessliss

Guest
Fatequeen, I've had a lot of experience with online dating - two things are going on here.
He's a player, no doubt about that and where is your self esteem?
Why on earth would you put up with such behaviour, you're better than that - aren't you.

Work on upping your vibration and stop expending your energy on a person who's vibration is in the looooooooow, low category.

Work on your Sacral Chakra cause right now you're living in fear, not sure of what.... - Liss
 

bostonian

visitor
Joined
Apr 28, 2009
Messages
120
Reaction score
0
Your question implies that you believe he should pay for what he did. You seem to be holding a grievance against him, and that anger will hold you back from achieving peace in your life. The hexagram may be saying that this experience has the potential to help you grow in spirit, but it also warns of pitfalls, which will make forward movement impossible. I'm afraid you may be the fox who has gotten its tail very wet, and it might be best to turn around, dry off, and start again. Forgive this person (in your mind -- that has nothing to do with behavior) and in the light of forgiveness and peace, decide what you want to do in the relationship. Looking at what you write, it seems to me that he would not be a good match for you. But this is something you have to decide, and the only way to make a good decision is to first forgive the situation and try to rid yourself of anger and fear.
 

fatequeen

visitor
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
61
Reaction score
0
The reading I got was: 64, changing lines 3 and 6

I asked the question because I believe in karma and I suppose I am just feeling quite angry right now and wondering how or what karma may be dealing this guy that I thought after some very long phone conversations turned out to be such a ass.

Trojina: "How he's paying for whatever he did isn't something you can know"

Not sure I agree with that.

Self-esteem... its not that I dont have any (I did break it off finally). I just like everything about the guy... until the threesome talk but was already pretty emtionally wrapped up by then.
 

fatequeen

visitor
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
61
Reaction score
0
Thanks for the input goddessliss ... listening to some sacral chakra music
 
G

goddessliss

Guest
Thanks for the input goddessliss ... listening to some sacral chakra music
Oh that's good chicky.
If you read some of my past threads maybe 2009/2010 you will see I did the same sort of thing as you and I always blamed myself and got my emotions all messed up because of similar reasons to you.
There's a couple of threads about a truck driver I was interested in feeling heartache etc. about it all. As it turns out this guy ended up chasing me off and on and the most recent time about 6 months ago - OMG! I have no interest in him anymore because I have upped my vibration and self esteem. He's a lovely man, 14 years younger than me but no I wouldn't even consider dating him now I've grown so much in myself.

New Years Eve I met someone he showed interest then backed off, he again showed interest then backed off - so I just thought nope move on and consequently forgot about him.
These days I do my best to find them on facebook before even considering meeting them - oh despite the fact that a lot of people bs on facebook you can really find out the truth about them if you dig deep enough saves all the heartache and stuff you speak about. - Liss
 

Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom

Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).

Top