How to Project a Fascinating Romantic Image of Me? 22.4>30

[marybluesky]

@Trojina English isn't my mother tongue, nor it's spoken in my country, though it's taught in the schools. Maybe that's a linguistic misunderstanding. I have an equivalent for "how to be fascinating" in my mind that doesn't seem odd or ridiculous if said by someone.

@dfreed to be honest no, I'm not interested in love or real relationship or anything similar at this point. I even can't exactly remember how it feels, as I'm far, far from being the hopeless romantic I was two years ago.

 

[Trojina]

@Trojina English isn't my mother tongue, nor it's spoken in my country, though it's taught in the schools. Maybe that's a linguistic misunderstanding. I have an equivalent for "how to be fascinating" in my mind that doesn't seem odd or ridiculous if said by someone.

I thought so, I thought there was a cultural difference there. For example in the UK if someone said 'how can I be fascinating ?' mostly people would think/say 'get over yourself', and comedy is full of characters who try to be what they are not in order to appear fascinating.

But then I thought about how dress and style is certainly something that is designed, particularly for younger people, to make them fascinating to others. And of course that is what Bradford was talking about, animals and birds displaying their fine feathers and fur, it is a mating thing. In order to mate most species have a physical indicator that they are ready to go for it, and we are just the same. And even if we aren't young or out to be sexually alluring we still generally want to present a physical appearance that shows us at our finest or gives clues to who we are. It's all great fun IMO, a celebration of life.

Rosada said

I think it might be an interesting experiment if you were to take the line 4 literally. For the next week wear something white and elegant, like a white feather boa and tell us what happens

...and I think the reading could well be pointing to physical adornment. I think one feels very different in different clothes, almost like different people. So maybe play around your style, use white, why not. See how different fashions/colours/styles make you feel.

This may seem a superficial aspect but we are in 22 and what's on the outside is there for a reason. Here it could also mean allowing your own beauty to be revealed in different ways. Not through more camouflage but through less. There's a TV show here where a young woman gets a 'make under' not a 'make over' and so looks more beautiful. It's usually someone wearing a lot of add ons, lots of makeup etc etc to the point you can't actually see her face. Though that likely is not you symbolically it might apply where it could mean less coverings to the personality which show more of the true person. I think Hilary writes on this principle for 22.6 in wiki, will look.

I also still think it may be predictive whereby someone offers what seems to good to be true.

 

[marybluesky]

And of course that is what Bradford was talking about, animals and birds displaying their fine feathers and fur, it is a mating thing. In order to mate most species have a physical indicator that they are ready to go for it, and we are just the same.

I think the reading could well be pointing to physical adornment.

This may seem a superficial aspect but we are in 22 and what's on the outside is there for a reason.

That's why I couldn't get why people insisted on being beautiful inside: the line- and the hexagram- clearly talk about the mating dance, appearance, image.

 

[Trojina]

Well I think we/they took that approach possibly because of the idea of someone trying to make herself fascinating implies she doesn't think she's enough, she thinks she's somehow wrong or ill designed when of course she cannot be, she's as much part of the natural world as the trees or the grass, she wasn't made wrong.

The purpose of adornment is also to showcase the beauty or the worth or the meaning of what's inside (as in advertising) but when what is inside is beautiful simply by it's own God given nature then only simple white adornment is needed for it to shine. Probably most of us have grown so many extra skins of personality through being hurt or being misunderstood we're quite covered over to the point where if people knew what was on the inside it might be much sweeter than what is on the outside. For example vulnerability invites love but also pain and so it can be closed down with many layers. There aren't shielding layers advised in your answer, it's more of an answer inviting you to trust in what you see and in what you feel. Howcome it's white horse too ? Powerful and dazzling, it comes to change things.

I've copied this over from wikiwing, some of Hilary's thoughts on white for line 6. Though you didn't cast line 6 the white was in your answer so it may help.

'White beauty.
No mistake.'

White meaning 'undyed', with nothing added. This could mean pure simplicity, a natural display of one's true nature. It might also mean a nature especially ready to take a colour, to be changed by its environment. Like 'writable media' for the computer.

22 zhi Hexagram 36, Brightness Hiding. The idea of expressing the essence, brought into a context of hiding the essence for fear of injury. Some of the motivation behind this line is fear of the consequences of displaying one's true nature, or of appearing too 'bright'. Hexagram 36 can also mean 'lack of appreciation.' We might conceal something about ourselves to avoid seriously displeasing or disappointing others.

'White beauty': not painting yourself in elaborate patterns to fit in, not changing yourself to avoid upsetting people, but also not displaying anything so naturally bright or distinctive that you might not easily 'go with' them. Not compromising the essence in the way you express it, but also not explicitly showing your 'true colours'.

There is a spectrum of meaning, from being ready to take on the colour of any situation (not dyed through with your own colour), through to genuine modesty that reveals a lot of good things.

I suddenly got drawn to wearing white and a white stone recently and realised I found the colour cooling and restful. However I can only wear white for bout 5 minutes before it gets dirty. But this in line 4 cannot be soiled, it's the kind of white an angel might emanate, from the inside.

Perhaps you could look out for images of winged white horses to carry with you start to feel what they are, what they bring.

What does white do to you ? I sometimes get visions given to me of white snow falling softly when I an very stressed and it's really soothing. There's nothing extra, just the white and the coolness. These are my associations to white, not linked to the white horse which is dynamic as well as pure.

I ask what does white do to you as I think colours do things to you. Pink in my experience is not just a colour it's a whole experience, it's like a whole way of being on it's own, I love it. White ...what does it do ?

 

[marybluesky]

White?
I like it but rarely wear white clothes. Looks nice as a piece of outfit, however somehow dull if overused. It doesn't have any special affect on me.

 

[becalm]

I suddenly got drawn to wearing white and a white stone recently and realised I found the colour cooling

I ask what does white do to you as I think colours do things to you. Pink in my experience is not just a colour it's a whole experience, it's like a whole way of being on it's own, I love it. White ...what does it do ?

White is a colour I wear quite a bit but Pink is my most favourite colour and people can always pick I love it!

 

[rosada]

Dull? Google "Jennifer Hudson White Dress"!

 

[dfreed]

honest no, I'm not interested in love or real relationship or anything similar at this point.

Well okay, this certainly challenges my assumptions about what you are looking for / asking about. Sorry for my mistaken assumptions. D.

 

[becalm]

Well okay, this certainly challenges my assumptions about what you are looking for / asking about. Sorry for my mistaken assumptions here. D.

I've the same assumption as you D.
Why are you asking about projecting a Romantic image if your just after a sexual encounter. Why not just ask about how you're sexually projecting yourself???

 

[marybluesky]

I've the same assumption as you D.
Why are you asking about projecting a Romantic image if your just after a sexual encounter. Why not just ask about how you're sexually projecting yourself???

Does a romantic relationship need to be lasting or "real" love? Can't one enjoy it more light-heartedly?

That aside, I find being attractive, having charisma fluttering by itself: think of Rockstars. I can't exactly say if their charisma is social/sexual/romantic/ etc- I guess that's a combination of all. The fans fancy them, still they don't have any relationship with (the majority of?) fans.

 

[becalm]

Does a romantic relationship need to be lasting or "real" love? Can't one enjoy it more light-heartedly?

That aside, I find being attractive, having charisma fluttering by itself: think of Rockstars. I can't exactly say if their charisma is social/sexual/romantic/ etc- I guess that's a combination of all. The fans fancy them, still they don't have any relationship with (the majority of?) fans.

So you want to be mens fantasy - maybe a simple Onlyfans page? Or less(clothing) is more alluring - no ornamentation needed. White is the colour of a Virgin. An untouched colour. Pure.

 

[diamant]

22.4 is make-believe, a fake fairy-tale.
White usually shows 'pure', but in this line we have:
"bright white, bright snowy white, bandits bandits marry copulate"
Bright white dazzles and blinds, and we're in bandit territory.

@marybluesky you're a sensitive loving soul, and it looks like every time you get involved in such scenarios you get heart-broken. So I don't know how you consider this light-hearted. It sounds to me like, because you've lost so many times to those players, and your self esteem is dented, you're intent on re-entering that field so as to (this time) win.

 

[marybluesky]

@diamant I believe that's because I've had wrong perceptions & methods.

The most successful people in attracting others are the ones who know how to build a persona, how to trigger the minds, how to push the buttons.
When you're loving & vulnerable, people may count on you and respect you, but that doesn't inspire romantic feelings.

 

[diamant]

The most successful people in attracting others are the ones who know how to build a persona, how to trigger the minds, how to push the buttons.

I agree. But you're forgetting an important detail: they also don't have a heart.

This is why they can carry out this strategical and manipulative performance without being affected themselves. They can feel some things (lust, anger, envy, hate) but love is not something this type of person is capable of. Hence they build a fake persona and look for weaknesses in others so that they can overpower them. I don't see how someone with a heart can do this.

 

[rosada]

More thoughts...

I was thinking about this reading while out walking. I was in the middle of a crosswalk when suddenly a car whizzed through the stop sign and right past me. When I looked to see the driver she wasn't even looking at the road but digging around looking at something on the seat next to her. IOW, I was thinking about you and your feeling you aren't seen when suddenly I experience not being seen! Made me have much more empathy for your plight!

Anyway, I think 22.4 - 30 is saying what you are looking for is a way to strengthen your inner vibration so it will be felt, so you will be seen, and ultimately your vibration will attract your energy match. 30 is more of a friendship, buddies energy match so perhaps that is why you are feeling drawn to a connection that is more of a friendship, something closer to the truth than the whole Cinderella myth.

So perhaps the advice is to do what ever you can do to strengthen your vibration - exercise, diet, art, music, clothes - enhance whatever makes you feel more alive!

 

[dfreed]

So I asked "How to project a fascinating romantic image of me" and got 22.4>30.

Hex. 22 is called 'adornment' or 'bedight' by Rutt (an older way of talking about adorment).

Rutt's translation of 22.4: bedight (adorned) and bright, plumed horses white. Not with raiders allied, but fetching a bride.

The lower trigram of 22 is Li, Flame, and with the 4th line moving the upper trigram changes from Mountain to Flame.

So this is showing your inner desire to shine (to project a romantic image), but outwardly you are perhaps keeping yourself apart (mountain-like) which makes you appear - or come across - as less than 'romantic'.

The advice then is to shine both inwardly and outwardly - 'as within, so without'. Line 22.4 suggests how to do this - but in broad (less than specific) strokes: maybe you can try adorning yourself (dressing up) brightly, perhaps wearing white or light-colored clothes, bright-colored scarves; or you can let your hair down, and weave it with bright ribbons (your plumage) - or more simply, just make yourself like a fine, white horse!

There is also a caution here: if you do adorn yourself - and become like a fine, white horse - this may attract 'raiders' who see you more as plunder; though others may see you as a potential bride (in a romantic way).

And ... is it possible you want to shine brightly (be attractive) on the outside, but this is in conflict with your desire (or need) to stay apart and safe in your mountain fortress? And if so, could this conflict be what's making you project a less-than romantic image - and the situation may not just be about how you 'adorn' yourself ?

Best, D.

 

[Trojina]

This kept popping up on my youtube and it's quite amusing/interesting and it made me think of this thread though I guess not directly relevant perhaps

White is a colour I wear quite a bit but Pink is my most favourite colour and people can always pick I love it!

If I lived in Australia we'd go out for a drink or something both of us dressed head to toe in pink

 

[becalm]

If I lived in Australia we'd go out for a drink or something both of us dressed head to toe in pink

Hahaha Absolutely!!

 

[redoleander]

I think it's so funny that so many of us are big pink wearers. I am too!! Red has also been a major seduction color for me

 

[redoleander]

And as for the idea of embodying a goddess or mythical being in relation to this line... I rather enjoy this type of thing. A few past partners (even a few of the actual good ones! ha) first saw me on stage or teaching in front of a room. I definitely am still me then, but I'm also channeling something else. It happens naturally. This other power. And it is magnetic! I think we all have this in some way, it's just kind of what flavor of energy it is.

 

[marybluesky]

In line with the advice of 22.4>30, I asked: where do I begin? and got 22.3.5.6> 3.

Again the hexagram 22 & its lines. 22 to 3 sounds to me like: just start the beautifying process.

Let's look at Bradford's translation of lines & my idea of them:
22.2: So elegant looking, as though dripping With enduring persistence, promising. Keep up being elegant;
22.5: Dressed up amidst hills and gardens One’s gift bundle of silk is but a shabby remnant Embarrassing But in the end, promising. Dress up; use a bit of silky, shiny objects;
22.6: Plain white elegance No mistake. Be simple, without any adornment. It contradicts the advice of 22.5, however, it makes sense if seen as dressing up in white.

The I Ching insists on 22, which seems completely relevant to my query.

 

[marybluesky]

I started to wear a white plain cotton shirt I had taken from my grandparents' house a few years ago as it was too small for my grandfather. I set it with denim jeans or cotton pants & colorful accessories. I almost always wear comfortable cloths, mostly on the loosie side, with natural material: cotton, denim, hemp. I avoid close-fitting, elastic fabrics as I don't like the way they feel on the skin and prevent the air from touching it.

Our secretary in the language institute came to me the first day she saw me on this shirt to say that I looked very sexy and ask where she could find such tunics. I went on to buy a lilac men's shirt the same day & added it to my wardrobe soon.

My new style attracts different looks from people, I'd say more admiring ones. Yes, I do sense the difference.

I didn't know where to put on the white shirt when I took it, as I couldn't imagine a proper style to use it, specially in outdoors. I was even hesitant as I started wearing it this summer, plus I wasn't sure it would be a good choice for the workplace.

Anyway, white seems to work magic for me.

 

[rosada]

Love this example of delaying trying the white shirt but finally giving it a chance and this leading to the lilac shirt and then the lilac shirt inspiring even more new possibilities.
22 > 3 "Don't let worry that your vision isn't all that clear hold you back, just get started!"

 

[marybluesky]

then the lilac shirt inspiring even more new possibilities.

Of course! I've started to buy, exchange, consider and use light/bright colored shirts, pants & accessories, and all in all, to adapt a totally new style, different from anything I've worn up to now.

I hadn't bought summer outdoor cloths for more than three years, by the way.