I dont want to know the future! :) 55 (1,4) 15

[oponopono]

What do I need to work on in myself before im ready to do X?

55 (1,4) > 15

X is a bold beautiful life decision, a trip. Which can also turn out to be emotional kamikaze, if im not prepared and in my center.

I have the wish to do it. But Im afraid Im not ready. Therefore,

55 : 15 - Go to the peaks of your humbleness, and willingness to accept what life brings back.

55.1 - accept you had your time together and its gone? or accept u can go there and just spend some time together and thats it

( btw, 62.1 is a flying bird on the way to misfortune, and X implies flying somewhere... to be considered? )

i can also just read 55.4 as what would happen if I do X (fly there) - I would find the hidden companion (very literally...)


but it seems I have a futurology answer - what would happen if i do X and I dont find the answer to my question - how can i best prepare?

thank u
(back to the book!)
yoana

 

[elias]

Well. 55. Be like the sun at midday!

To my mind 55.4 (highest yang to yin) rules this. Hard to get a consistent reading on this one -- either you're at the peak of your personal power or you're over-estimating what you can accomplish. Given the lack of details in your post, only you can answer this one. The fact that you're asking suggests you're approaching this with a sense of your own limitations.

15 -- that humility thing again... coming into a place where you can balance the issues involved here.

Time to see that great man.

 

[oponopono]

Sorry Elias, I didnt mean to sound secretive, its just that my posts are often too long and I was trying to keep it concise

X is a trip somewhere. Very important for me. One I know I want to do, just dont know when.
almost 2y ago the man I was with just left, and for one year I had no idea of his whereabouts. Now I know where he lives, and its a 2h plain ride. I have a long intertwined story with this city I would need to see again, and this is still The Guy, despite everything.

Rationally I know that I can only do this if I surrender myself to ANYTHING that happens, absolutely NO EXPECTATIONS. But this reading - and my intuition - tell me i might just be bullshitting myself. And then it becomes as I said on my post "emotional kamikaze".

By telling What happens if I go there? and not How can I best prepare before I go there?
maybe the Y was trying to show me that 55.1 and 55.4 still would brake my heart...
I thought,
Wow, if this is what happens when I go there than I might as well not go

...and with thinking like this.... I might as well not go...



This man is again coming up because I regularly cast on our situation, and lately a lot of 24 and 46 are popping up (46 recommends traveling south!) and 53 for me, unchanging, as how to be conduct this process. I feel like starting step by step to address this issue again. Ultimately this will lead to X, going there.

Can you still figure out how 55 : 15 could be helping me prepare, beyond what I said above?

On the early readings I also ask if we meet again this year at some point and got 8.5 > 2, which for me indicates yes.
I dont see him moving so it must be me, who at some point, feels brave enough for... X.



(that was the long background I omitted)
looking fwd,
Yoana