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I wanna get rid of him for good

cutiecat

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Hey all! Thank you for reading my post. There is this person in my life that I do not really like and surprisingly I find it hard to get rid of him. I do interact with him once in a while, as a former co-worker and just a soul I can talk to, but otherwise he is pretty useless and quite annoying. He wants something with me, but this will never happen. So I asked how about I stop interacting with this weirdo altogether and got 42.3.4 to 13. I truly cannot stand him but he is very very clingy. This reading seems to advise me on how to go about it - bu talking to him? Hmmmmmm. Not sure what I can say to him. He seems to be not all there.
-CC
 

willowfox

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You have two choices, either you pluck up your courage and tell him to "take off", or you can ask a close friend to tell him on your behalf, to "get lost" as you have absolutely no interest in him.
 

cutiecat

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And you think in both cases he will actually take off? 'Cause it did not happen before. It's like he does not get it. Why men (and not attractive, or loosers ) think a woman would be interested in them? I wish that I an attractive woman had the same self-assurance ( or delusions)some men do :)

WF thank you for your advice. I do not have the courage and we do not have any mutual connections we have left.
-CC
 
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willowfox

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There must be someone, a cop would be the ideal solution to frighten him away, anyone with authority over him.
 

cutiecat

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:duh: cop is a good idea for a stalker like himself. I think once I tell him that our relationship is basically a completely platonic one of two unhappy people I hope he will take off. Do you agree? I do not want to hurt anybody either. He is an idiot true, but I do not need more bad karma. :) In our case misery loves company is a good description of the relationship. Also WF i was wondering can you see anything about this man? beyond this reading. Too late now anyways. I emailed him saying that I do not want any contact with him anymore. Hopefully he'll get the message.
 
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cutiecat

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Ok, it's done. I told him to get lost. But that did not stop him before. so my question how probable that he is out of my life forever produced 64.1 to 38. I guess I feel humiliated by even letting him into my life at the first place, he is truly not a person I can respect or relate to. Imagine his wife just waited for him to pay off the morgage and after thats was done divorced him right away and kept the house and now she has a new lover. What an awful man! I was in such a vulnerable state so I allowed him to enter my life. It would have never happened otherwise. When i asked if it was beneficial for me to get rid of him I got 3. Not a good answer I think. But I hope that Universe will fill his place with a person who is more adequate and right for me as a friend or a suitor. I hate to think this guy wnated something with me and yet told me lets go to that reataraunt, it's cheaper. Too bad I told him to get lost only now.
 
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willowfox

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So my question how probable that he is out of my life forever produced 64.1 to 38.

It says that he's not out yet, so don't get out the beer and party hats just yet, as there's more work to be done. You need to block him from accessing your email accounts etc, that's easy. Block his phone number, if he tries knocking on your door don't answer but call the cops and tell them that there is a drunk trying to break into your home.

Total shutdown, and thus separation.
 

cutiecat

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:) Exatemente. Wow WF! Thanks for giving me heads up! He is not all there, but I did not realize that he will be behaving like this...Thank you!
Now the question is will Universe finally remember about humble me and send me the man I want so i can stop being a spinster and start reproducing in the framework of the loving normal family? got 8.1.4 to 17. I felt that I needed to get rid of him to empty a space for a right person for me. He was just taking energy from me and giving nothing in return.
 

willowfox

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Now the question is will Universe finally remember about humble me and send me the man I want so i can stop being a spinster and start reproducing in the framework of the loving normal family? got 8.1.4 to 17.

Change your attitude and outlook, you know, stop being so down and you should attract a much, much better class of man to your door. You can do it, so just raise your standards and look in the right places, obviously not in places like KFC or Burger King.
 

gato

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Now the question is will Universe finally remember about humble me and send me the man I want so i can stop being a spinster and start reproducing in the framework of the loving normal family? got 8.1.4 to 17. I felt that I needed to get rid of him to empty a space for a right person for me. He was just taking energy from me and giving nothing in return.


how well can you cook ?
 

arabella

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Even Worse

Oooooh! Even marginally WORSE than the line about finding a cheaper restaurant. :rolleyes:

So there Cutiecat, that's one off your list. Gato will not be applying for the open position as the man of your dreams.
 

themis

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Cutie,

'The way to a man's heart is through the stomach'.

Well, that definitely helps but in this day and age don't think it's a prerequisite.
Guess it would depend on the part of the world you live in and the guy in question.

As you're cute you're bound to attract lots. Think of the desired criteria and wish ... but
careful what you wish for - a Russian/French colleague told me years ago .. cos it might
materialize ... so be precise in your wish/visualization. A famous English author advises
the same, and it's true ... be precise.
 

gato

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Oooooh! Even marginally WORSE than the line about finding a cheaper restaurant. :rolleyes:

So there Cutiecat, that's one off your list. Gato will not be applying for the open position as the man of your dreams.

ah, arabella you have ruined all my plans... :D .

The way to a man's heart is through the stomach'.

yes, cooking is vital for any relationship. can you imagine all the things that can be done while cooking ? :rant:
 

arabella

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Sorry Gato, but I felt I should be honest with Cutie, men who think first of dinner and who's going to cook it seem to have trouble changing that theme to something more romantic. Obviously she wants the type who, when they want to discuss dinner with you, know how to pick up the phone and make a reservation some place enticing. ;)
 

cutiecat

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Halleluya Arabella!

I also inquired what to do with this person now got 41.3.4 to 14. Why 14 - he will give me money tp cover my debt? I hate being hurt like that. He told me ohh, your boobs are getting smaller, so is your face (meaning thinner)...WHY do I need to hear that? Do I discuss the size of his penis saying it's tiny (just a thought, I do not know anything about this). i guess I feel so hurt by his behaviour towards me. I have no idea how his wife survived. WF, do you think I did a right thing leaving this weirdo? How desperate can one be for even having this person in my life? Do you guys know of any good antidote for the next time I'll be verbally abused? I suddenly realized it happened all the time to me. WHY?
 

willowfox

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WF, do you think I did a right thing leaving this weirdo? How desperate can one be for even having this person in my life? Do you guys know of any good antidote for the next time I'll be verbally abused? I suddenly realized it happened all the time to me. WHY?

You don't need to ask, you know its the right thing to do. The trouble with desperation, is that you attract all the rejects.

Antidote for verbal abuse = a kick to the "eggs". Simple, easy to do, extremely effective and exceedingly painful. They, he, will get the message the first time you score a goal.

So, get cracking and practice kicks using the foot to target and for close up work, knee to target.
 

themis

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@Gato - A scene between Tom Cat n Lil Ms. Jerry, in the kitchen, as Jerry invents yet
another recipe to whet his appetite ... and Tom Cat plays around ... a remake of
Disney's Tom & Jerry cartoon.
 

gato

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Sorry Gato, but I felt I should be honest with Cutie, men who think first of dinner and who's going to cook it seem to have trouble changing that theme to something more romantic. Obviously she wants the type who, when they want to discuss dinner with you, know how to pick up the phone and make a reservation some place enticing. ;)

jeez... you two are too tensed. cheer-up, i'm on the other side of the planet
 

arabella

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You're on then Gato. We are trying to advise here on a productive attitude for Cutie. You're a guy and must be the true expert here -- what's the right way for a good looking woman to dispose of an ignorant bore and attract a winner?
 

gato

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the more she will hurt him the more he will cling on her. only time will do it and as Yi says "It furthers one to abide in what endures. No blame. "

attracting a winner ? that is more complex .... first of all, i think she must learn to recognize them when she see them. yet another Yi wisdom " Take not a maiden who, when she sees a man of bronze, Loses possession of herself."

Now I have to run for cover.... stones are coming .
 

arabella

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Agreeing with Gato that there is a type of man who takes ANY attention as positive, rather than realising he warrants no attention at all. To abide in what endures, you must keep your own counsel, ignore him. That's what he merits and that's honouring what is worthwhile: your own integrity. No blame.

If he's rude to you, walk away, hang up, talk to someone else and look right past him. Do not reinforce bad behavior and most of all, don't put any energy in his direction that magnetises the situation further. I used to know a seer who advised me to actively visualise myself cutting, with a huge sword, every psychic, psychological or practical tie between me and any antagonistic person. Just cease to see them [and i mean that in a literal sense, when they are standing in front of you, don't notice them] or engage at all. That seems apt advice here.
 

cutiecat

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thanks a lot guys! Arabella, what an interesting suggestion about cutting ties. I'll try. Did it work for you? Unfortunately I'm not trained to re-act to rudeness or abuse or just someone not being nice right away, there is a considerable delay before i realize how rude people are or how bad I feel, probably stems from the earlier years..
 

arabella

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Yes, visualisation is a powerful technique and works wonders. You think you have these things "in mind" and then when situations recurr you fall right back into the old pattern. Visualisation is a way to be prepared, in advance, to repell such people. In your spare time sit quietly and get a clear mental image of the "cords" of energy that bind you, even where they may attach, to your shoulders, your arms, your waist, wherever you feel this person believes he has a "hold" on you. Then get out your gigantic scissors, sword, whatever you believe works best and slice through these bonds and watch this guy who has been excised from your realm floating off into the atmosphere until he disappears, or curling into a tiny ball and then POOF! See and feel any attachment you had shatter and fall to the floor, or blow out the door. Imagine anything you want, imagine glass walls coming up around you so that you can't hear them, they can't touch you. Walk on past. Practice this enough that, when this guy calls or shows up, your mental image of him being wiped away outweighs his presence. And, quite literally, don't give him a nod, a look, or the time of day.
 

cutiecat

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Hmmm...Thanks a lot Arabella, I'll certainly try it out. Since WF's proposal to kick person's eggs is way too difficult to me. Now I'm thinking it's like I've never learnt to protect myself from bad people or situations. What a self-defeating attitude I have.
 

arabella

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Well generate POSITIVE from now on Cutiecat. Send out waves of positivity and happiness. Gato is right that some people feed off uncertainty or negativity as though they were draining a battery. Your best "weapons" are clarity about yourself and what you want [as Gato already said, visualise THAT first and foremost]. Knowing you don't want this guy, his attitude, his ignorance, nor anything else about him, stop investing energy in "him" or the idea of him. Cut that. Another thing, when you visualise, talk out loud, put your voice out there to remove or reinforce -- as appropriate. Make it as real to yourself as you can that you are losing that which is useless to you and calling forward what you want.
 
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alev

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Hey arabella, way off topic but just had to throw this out there...your picture of the pup, where did you get that? I ask because years ago I was presented with a small leather evening bag with this exact picture on the front of it as a gift! I believe it was purchased in Dublin. Seeing this puppy again now here brought back some memories, I will have to go digging that little bag out of storage!
 

cutiecat

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Thanks Arabella! I'll start doing it from now on. This idea of sending out hapiness/love/positivity strikes me as a very smart thing to do. I tried it once during the meditation classes I used to take and I felt pretty good about it. Thanks a lot! Oh and I need to learn how to cook too :)
 

arabella

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Hi Alev, it was just a random photo I picked up off the internet when i googled "puppies." I love dogs, used to raise golden retrievers and westies like this little guy. He just lit up the day when I saw him.
 

alev

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I am a "terrier" girl myself :)
I was just curious about this puppy since he must be famous if he is appearing on handbags! Though my bag is several years old now, so he is all grow up by now!
 

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