pregnant - hex 3 unchanging

[dancingfox]

Hi all,

I have been a regular silent visitor to Online Clarity for a while now. I love this site and the way everyone shares there insights, knowledge and intuition with each other. I am still new to the Yi, mostly I get the answers I am looking for by skimming this website or Lises website, oracle of the Sun. I also have a copy of the book of changes at home. These sources usually suffice in my search for guidance.

The question I asked the Yi today is such a difficult one for me on a personal level, making it a challenge to remain objective. Which is why I thought that this would be an ideal question to share on this forum, I am hoping to find the guidance I seek on this matter through other peoples input about my reading, because I feel completely lost on the subject at this moment.

Yesterday I went to the doctor because I wasn't feeling well, I had been nauseous all day and couldn't get any food down. She took some blood samples from me, just in case; Today I got my blood test results, with the shocking news that I am pregnant :bag:
This was completely unexpected news for me, and very emotional to. I am 33 years old and I have been a steady relationship for 4 years now and I feel like I might be ready for a child... But my partner isn't ready at all, He has always been very clear on that matter. I have always used protection (the pill) so this news came to me like a thunderclap. When I was seventeen I had to have an abortion, as I wasn't ready for my own kid, being a kid myself back then and all... It was a horrible experience and the idea to go through all that again truly horrifies me.

This evening me and my partner are going take the time to talk about my (or our) pregnancy, I feel so anxious about all of this...

So I asked this question to the Yi
What course of action should I take regarding my pregnancy?
I got Hex 3 unchanging
'A difficult beginning' for sure. The spark of life.
Perhaps the Yi is simply telling me that if we adjust to this new little spark of life it will have room to grow?

All input would be welcome!

 

[mezzamare]

Hi,

What a fascinating reading! Hex 3, of course, is all about sprouting, the tentative beginnings of life. It's obviously a very poetic reflection of your pregnancy.

On a deeper level (and more appropriate to your question) it feels like Yi is suggesting that you give this news time to take root in your own heart and mind. Imagine the emergent knowledge of this new life development unfolding toward the light of your own understanding.

There is struggle and difficulty as it gets established, as you wrap your mind and perhaps life around this change. But you have to give this tender growth time to get rooted. You have to give both yourself and your partner time to let your own truths around this issue develop and grow. You might be surprised at how what starts as a fragile idea blooms into something very strong and vibrant.

So my take is that Yi says, for the time being, "No action quite yet. Just sit for a moment with this new growth and watch it unfold for a bit." Even the judgment in Wilhelm says "Nothing should be undertaken."

 

[pocossin]

What course of action should I take regarding my pregnancy?
3 unchanging

If you ever want children, do not abort this child unless medical tests show the fetus to be unhealthy. You are now 33, and time flies. Do not think your partner will stay with you if you remain childless. That's not the way the world works, as other members of Clarity could perhaps testify.

Hatcher:

3.X
Clouds and thunder
Rallying
The noble young one, accordingly, sorts warp from weft

-- Decide on fundamental importance.

3.0
Rallying
Supreme fulfillment
Worthwhile to be persistent
Not at all useful to have somewhere to go
Worthwhile to enlist delegates

I think you will find support for having this child if you ask for it.

 

[dancingfox]

Hi Mezzamare

That's a wonderful take on this reading. We talked earlier this evening and nothing is decided yet. He understands my point of view as I understand his. We agreed it would be best to take things as they come for now. My heart tells me to keep the baby but I want so much to have him believing in us as a family a 100%... He doesn't want to see me suffer through another abortion and at the same time is scared shitless at the prospect of becoming a dad. My heart and my personal experience with him tells me he would make a great dad but right now he is full of self-doubt.
We will visit the gynecologist together next week and then we'll decide. Yes indeed, we will sit together for a moment, watching this new growth unfold. No sense in worrying, there 's nothing I can do but to watch everything unfold. It's odd, but for now I feel at peace with myself.

 

[dancingfox]

Hi Pocossin

I really don't think he would leave me for not having children. As I know my man, he's about as loyal and true as they come. If I would choose to keep the baby he might go through a horrible phase, but he'd never leave me.
I might be wrong, but we do have a strong, lasting chemistry between us, it has kept us close together from the moment we fell in love with each other. With love came mutual respect, and even though I dread the idea of a possible abortion, out of respect for his opinion I would listen to what he has to say on the matter. But it is ultimately my decision, not his to make. As mentioned in my reply to Mezzamare before, we will wait for the visit to the gynecologist and then we will decide. I hope to find the support from my partner for the baby, eventually.

 

[mirian]

Hi Mezzamare

That's a wonderful take on this reading. We talked earlier this evening and nothing is decided yet. He understands my point of view as I understand his. We agreed it would be best to take things as they come for now. My heart tells me to keep the baby but I want so much to have him believing in us as a family a 100%... He doesn't want to see me suffer through another abortion and at the same time is scared shitless at the prospect of becoming a dad. My heart and my personal experience with him tells me he would make a great dad but right now he is full of self-doubt.
We will visit the gynecologist together next week and then we'll decide. Yes indeed, we will sit together for a moment, watching this new growth unfold. No sense in worrying, there 's nothing I can do but to watch everything unfold. It's odd, but for now I feel at peace with myself.

Dear dancing fox,

I believe that this is exactly what Hex 3 is about. The hexagram itself talks about things that are still taking form, not only as the baby that is still growing at early stages, but also as you and your partner coming to grips with this new situation. With Hex 3 things are still neither resolved nor completely clear. Some translations describe Hex 3 as a bit of a chaos, because all the elements involved in the situation are still not in their place. So, you have bits of information coming from different directions, you have decisions not made yet because things have not been completely thought through. Everything is still evolving up to the point when eventually things will fall into place, things will make sense, decisions will be made easy.

In my view, Hex 3 is saying that eventually you will make the decision to keep the baby. The reason why I think so is because the hexagram represents growth, with all the difficulties that it implies, the effort involved, the time that it takes for something to come to fruition. That is the reason why I think that you got Hex 3 from the Yi, instead of other hexagrams in answer to your question. Very clever

 

[dancingfox]

Dear Miriam,

I would like nothing better then to keep the baby. Tomorrow I will go the gynecologist, alone. Today my partner made it clear to me he doesn't want anything to do with my pregnancy. I just hope and pray he will rethink his point of view eventually.

 

[Trojina]

When I saw hex 3 and heard you got pregnant though on the pill it made me see how life will find it's way whatever....like when a plant appeared coming through my mothers bathroom floor....through concrete....somehow. That is such a great answer for you, hexagram 3.

In your first post I 'heard' you as joyful and excited...and I felt amongst that burgeoning life your boyfriend's ideas about 'not being ready' were kind of irrelevant, especially given the circumstances. I mean you are in a stable relationship, you are a nice age to have a baby, not too young, not too old....and you sound like you want it...and it sure as hell seems to want you and want to get born by the sound of it...(getting around the pill takes some doing) ! So amongst this picture I am afraid your boyfriends refusal just sounds like an irrelevance....by which I mean who is actually ever ready for life or death ? Who is ever ready ? In my experience both catch us unawares...we don't dictate.

There's a thread on 3 unchanging I will link to....I think the processes of 3 unchanging are a law unto themselves....


I am all for free choice and so on but here I truly hope you will have this baby if you want it. This answer does not speak of endings to me. I am very sorry that your boyfriend has taken this attitude that he wants nothing to do with your pregnancy ?


Eh ? Too late he has already had something to do with it ! Does he really think life is going to happen just when he wants it ? You know I think his attitude is rough on you. If he loves you surely he should be supporting your decision.


To sum up you are a healthy 33 year old woman who doesn't want another abortion and you have been in a stable relationship for some time and you sound happy if shocked about our news and you cast 3uc. My first thought in reading your first post was 'congratulations' because you sound happy....Also I don't think he'd be able to hold back from loving the baby once it's born. You stress you want him to have a choice, but I think he already made it actually. He made that life too

 

[dancingfox]

Hi people

Thanks for all of your input. Sadly, this Monday I had a miscarriage. We did indeed decide to keep the baby, and we were only just beginning to adjust to our new situation and be actually happy about it.

A difficult beginning, yes. A difficult ending to... The one positive thing we got from this experience is that we now know that yes, we are ready for kids. It made us think of what already we have together and what could be... in the future;