Preparing for a tricky conversation

[Michellez1]

Background: I have been doing a circuit class (maximum of 4) for 8 weeks. I knew the business owner from a business network 10 years ago when he asked for my advice about making videos for his business. He seems to me to be mild-mannered and very methodical and controlled. His service is technically very neat and clear, and he is very focussed on Marketing and his brand and what he offers is expensive. I am in my late 50's and just getting back into exercise, so I can't do some of the exercises in their full form yet, I am not strong enough and my knees are a bit sore though sound. So I have been adapting as I go, to avoid injury. There was another person in the circuit class in their 60's with similar physical limitations and her contract finished on Thursday. Recently a women in their 40s joined the class. That's all of us for now. I was loving the class, getting stronger, it was great for my mental health but to be honest, it was beyond what I could really afford. The owner called me on Friday to suggest I move out of the circuit class to one to one personal trainer sessions which are totally unaffordable for me and not at all what I wanted. At first I was shocked that he would try to upsell to me, (because I can't be sold anything) and then he said "then we can't help you, because we are making too many adjustments for you". I was so shocked. Partly because he was basing his assessment on a junior PT who took the session on Thursday. And there was no space for me to explain my adjustments, which I saw as slowly building up to capacity and I had, had some good progress. The call was very short because I had to go out and I was in shock, like someone had removed all of my agency, someone made a decision that would impact me without having all of the facts. We arranged to talk on Monday and I sent a text to confirm.

The question:

What to I need to learn from J in conversation tomorrow and how should I prepare​

The cast: 44 changing to 50 (sorry I don't know how to write it?)

When I read 44 -
'Coupling, the woman is powerful.
Do not take this woman.'

This feels like a description of me. I don't know if I am being paranoid or intuitive, but I don't think he likes strong women or someone he can't control and I felt the same about the junior PT. I don't mean to be too much but I have a strong authentic energy and it can be hard to contain. I would never allow anyone to push me to lift a weight or do an exercise I wasn't comfortable with. I am very self-directed. I am in charge of me. The other worry is if this was subtle ageism like I was bringing the look and quality of the class down. But maybe these assumptions are not fair at all and he made the suggestion out of genuine care and wanting me to have better support and not risk injury? Whatever he thinks, I won't let it limit me or my path to getting fit, I feel more determined to go elsewhere and continue to progress. But I didn't like the decision being out of my hands. The second hexegram :
'The vessel.
Creating success from the source.
Good fortune.'

Just feels like it's a clean break, I can find something better and more affordable, and mostly I am relieved because I felt like my authenticity and directness was too much for him and I could dominate at times without realising it. Though not really, he did feel controlling in a passive way.

My struggle for the final debrief tomorrow, is working out how much to share, because I don't know if my caution is fear and paranoia-based or if it is based on good intuition. If I shared more, I'd like him to know I had a plan for my fitness, lots of enthusiasm, I was confident I'd get there, I was enjoying and for it be cancelled with out hearing my perspective was really such a shock and upsetting. If I am right and he is controlling, in quiet methodical way, I'd rather keep the conversation short and get out of there. I hat the thought of judging him unfairly because I am carrying fears from the the past.

 

[Hans_K]

Hi Michellez1,

The cast: 44 changing to 50 (sorry I don't know how to write it?)

H44.5 <> H50

H44 is the hexagram of the encounter
H50 is the hexagram of transformation, different elements brought together in a cauldron where they combine and integrate into something new.
So you can see H44<>H50 as change/transformation through an encounter.

The upper trigram Heaven changes to Fire due to the moving line at the 5th position.
This is about giving clarity (Fire) to leadership (Heaven). In other words the owner explaining why he made this suggestion that you leave from the circuit class.

The text of this line says:

A melon wrapped in willow leaves.
Hidden beauty.
Then it falls down from the sky.

Jack Balkin's comment on this line is:
" Like fish, a melon decays easily, and therefore symbolizes the
potential for corruption. But if the melon is preserved properly, “wrapped in willow leaves,” it is healthy and fragrant. In the same way, if a person takes the right steps and exercises patience, beneficial opportunities will fall to him like a ripe fruit from a tree."
The underlined part refers to H50: transformation, something new.

The text of the Judgement of H44

Encounter.
The woman is powerful.
Do not marry her

refers to the yin line at the 1st position. Here a yin line invades 5 yang lines from below and starts an advance upwards here where it expels the yang lines (the sequence H44 - H33 - H12 - H20 - H23 - H2) . Yin is the weak, the dark, the inferieur, hence the text talks about the woman (yin) is powerful. (Sorry the I Ching is incredibly old-fashioned when it comes to man - woman characterisations).
So this text can be seen as a warning not to commit to negative/"dark" thoughts, a negative/"dark" attitude.

The text of the Image shows the opposite, the prince disseminates his commands. He is confident of himself.

My interpretation of the answer would be to go into the conversation with an open mind and, above all, let him explain why he thinks this change of class is necessary.
Trigram Heaven is also about money and finance, so when you are honest about that aspect, I believe there could be a surprising outcome (A melon wrapped in willow leaves...).

This would be my interpretation. As always, take what resonates and leave the rest

 

[my_key]

Hi Michellez1

The question:

What to I need to learn from J in conversation tomorrow and how should I prepare​

The cast: 44 changing to 50 (sorry I don't know how to write it?)

44 <> 50

The background you recount speaks of many things that shape your view of the world and how you behave accordingly. This encounter will offer you opportunities (44) to eat the world and your past in a different way. Of course, provided you remain open to the new and do not step back into the old. Prepare yourself, for the final debrief, in ways that promote your openness to adopting new ways to conduct your business (50).

44.5 - What you will learn are new ways that can underpin how you live going forward. Step out from behind the masks that you wear to control your world and into the jade palace that you have barred yourself from entering.

44 is deeply influenced by the strength and inspiring force of Hex 1. This meeting and its outcomes provides for you opportunities to learn how to climb aboard and ride these waves.

... or there may be other interpretations that resonate with you more strongly.

Good Luck

 

[rosada]

My image for 44.5 is of little boy holding up a puppy and saying, “Please, Mom, he followed me home. Can we keep him?”