Roommate Drama - Advice Needed

[openheartsf]

Wow. So I'm having major conflict with my current housemate. I have told her I'm moving and she is now being VERY nasty and verbally abusive to me through note-writing. She has called me a "selfish bi***" and other things that are not so nice.

I gave her the standard 30-days notice but she thinks I have wronged her because I gave notice on the 7th and not the 1st. I realize many people give notice on the 1st but I did not think I HAD to give notice on the 1st.

I feel so tense going to the house. I have not seen her since she started leaving the nasty notes but I have nowhere else to go and I will eventually have to see her.

I asked the Yi what should I do?

I received 52.3 moving to 23

Keeping the back unmoving so that one no longer feels one’s body, and walking out into the courtyard without noticing the people there brings no blame.

I suppose I just need to continue to take the moral high ground and avoid her. 52 seems to say keep my distance and stay centered.

I am not at all good with confrontation. I wonder if I should try to find a friend to stay with for the next 3 weeks. Does anyone have any advice about line 3? It refers to sexual desire which really doesn't make a lot of sense in regards to my situation???

I know in my heart I have done nothing wrong. But she is mad at me and also her sister is mad at me too.

My heart is heavy even though I did what I had to do because it was a toxic living situation for me.

 

[rodaki]

Ouch!!!

oh my . . . always so sad when people give way to their lower desires . .
I think you are reading this straight, but I would see fury as the feeling you should not give in to -do not give in either to your own, or to others' . . and do not run away no, this seems to be a case where you have to stand your stand. Noone has the right to push you out of your house, you are still paying rent for god's sake!!
You can find some very good interpretations here
http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/hexresults.php?nr=52&lines=0001000
(minus some nasty comments floating around - I guess it goes with the territory of the line )

really wish you the best with this Openheartsf!!

rodaki

 

[diamanda]

"My heart is heavy even though I did what I had to do because it was
a toxic living situation for me" - this is exactly the meaning of 52:3.

The answer is telling you two things.

First, how this came about. By keeping your heart suffocating, for so
long, in a toxic situation as you put it, "The dissatisfaction increases
to an angry heat", as Legge puts it, and then what results is Splitting
Apart.

Second, it shows you what to do, as you asked, or rather, what not to
do in this case. In 52:3 the upper and the lower parts of the body are
divided. Perhaps the lower part of the body (legs) wants to go, leave,
however the heart feels so sick that they cannot coordinate and act
properly. Hence Splitting Apart, hence the advice of 23 'it does not
further one to go anywhere'.

Both 52 and 23 are about not going anywhere. Stay where you are.
Perhaps tell your room-mate and her sister that you all need a couple
of days to think about the whole thing in calmness? It's never wise to
decide anything while you are at a 52:3 situation.

 

[Trojina]

I think 52.3 sitting still with things is not the healthiest way - forcing calmness here chokes you, 'smothers the heart'. You have to let off some steam here one way or another or the pressure gets too much. How can you let off pressure in the situation ? There seems two ways i can think of. One way is to leave, the other way is to confront. Usually the third way is to do nothing but in 52.3 it doesn't seems a good option.

 

[bamboo]

i can also see that 52.3 means not to tiptoe around in fear of running into her, and maybe if/when you do see her, it wouldnt hurt to speak up. YOu did nothing wrong. she is obviously trying to guilt you for the fact that she now has to find a new roommate. Hold your tongue if you must, but if she continues to be abusive to you, I would really be straight with her and tell her to back off and leave you alone.

 

[openheartsf]

Thanks everyone. I will stand my ground. I decided to say my peace to the sister and I will say it to my roommate too if needed. I'm going to lay low this weekend because I am tired and emotionally drained and need a rest, but when next I see her I will not tiptoe around her and if she wants to be immature that's fine but I won't stoop to that level.

Her sister has come around and emailed me that she understood and wished me well. So at least I can know that someone is on my side (sort of).

I hate bullies! It's a challenge for me to stand up for myself but I will do it if I have to and know that I've done nothing wrong.

Thanks for all of the support!

OHSF