The way forward

[nks]

Quite by (divine?) accident, I fell into a certain unique collaboration with "A" that has had a huge effect on my spiritual and personal development.

Now, I receive news that circumstances are about to force a radical change to the collaboration. Indeed, unless a door appears that neither of us sees at this point, this appears to be an end to working together, and possibly even of any contact.

It will certainly not be the end for either of us of what we have been able to collaborate on, and, in some ways, it even seems that this parting, though unwanted, may be a part of what will lead each of us to larger, wider places. We are profoundly different people, who move for the most part in vastly separated worlds. But, "we fit," and this collaboration across differences has often seemed to have a life of its own. Can what we do together continue, or is this a time when we must honor the separateness of our destinies?

I do not at this point have all the details of what is causing the change, and I will not get some of them until we discuss the situation in person. I won't know exactly what is or is not in my power to change, nor, beyond what I intuit, the true state of mind of my partner. The timing of this change dovetails with other significant changes in my life, to the point that it seems that for the next few weeks, all my being will be concentrating on seeing my way through the same narrow place, that I am being called to a renewal and a rebirth.

(By way of a little more introduction of myself, I will say that I study astrology, and these new events seem of a piece with hard, unchosen changes arising last summer and last fall -- they feel linked to the ongoing Pluto-Saturn opposition. The theme of this opposition has been explained to me as, "Change or die!")

I gather my thoughts and feelings, seek advice, and prepare to meet A, to find the way forward. I contemplate a question for the I Ching. I come to Clarity, and find that an amazingly diverse group of wise contributors is present.

My question forms, and I ask:

"What is my path,
that I may honor my Work,
and A's being,
and that I may honor A's Work,
and my being?"

The answer I receive is:

60 - Limitation (changing at the 5th place) to

19 - Approach


Any insight will be appreciated.

Thank you,

nks

 

[candid]

Hello and welcome, Nks!

I don?t see any parting of the ways in your reading. Neither do I see a specific great bodily work in the making. I do see a continued collaboration, however. The Ching illustrates the circumstance as a separation of two types of water, separated by firmament. Apparently this is a long distance relationship?

The reading denotes the setting and organizing of limits. This could pertain to either your personal relationship with this person, or your further collaboration of a project separate from the one you both began working on.

It isn?t healthy to be too strict in imposing these limits, either on yourself or this other person. Though you seem to look up to this other person, it appears that you are actually the one who is in a leadership position. As such, your influence will best be demonstrated by applying these limits, first to yourself, demanding little or nothing from this other person. Then, working within these limits and modest means, if you are able to achieve something, you will be recognized and your influence will be emulated to this other person, and possibly beyond.

Further, a favorable time is approaching. ?What becomes great are the two strong lines growing into the hexagram from below; the light-giving power expands with them.? Could these two lines represent you and your partner? It does well to take advantage of this advancement of what is strong. But, also realize that this time won?t last forever. It is well to prepare yourself for further difficulties and challenges down the road.

The council is to continue nurturing this other person and protecting the relationship. A new beginning is approaching.

~Candid

 

[dharma]

Hi Nks,

I am using the tarot to help me with the interpretation of 60/19.

*You* will have to do something to keep this relationship alive (The Chariot Crowns). There is a strong compatibility between you (Temperance as Long-term Influence) that signifies a worthiness of nurturing (Empress as Probable Outcome) the connection to another level.

Outer circumstances are definitely bringing things to a close (The World & The Wheel) and it is up to you to actively DO something. However, you are reluctant to assert yourself (8 of Swords your Self-Center) because you are not certain at all that the desire to maintain contact is mutual (The Sun as the challenge & 9 of Swords in environment).

It is in your best interests to make sure that the restrictions that you are imposing on yourself right now (as you struggle to decide how to handle this) are not re-directed later towards the relationship between you (King of Swords your Illusions) should you find the courage to speak up and find a way to develop things to another level.

I hope this helps.

Dharma

 

[nks]

Thank you both, and I will mull these insights. They are very helpful.

Candid, I find the image of the two types of water separated by a firmament especially helpful. Distance is a factor in the relationship, but more significant is the "different worlds" we are rooted in. I can see the situation as a challenge to the firmament, and a call to redefine what separates and connects us (with an emphasis on the physical and literal in this).

Setting and organizing limits is a message I'm receiving from all directions right now. Likewise the message that I'm reluctant to assert myself or accept the reality of my leadership role in situations. As I've always been someone who has been quite creative at disrupting limits and seeing beyond them, I wonder if this is a call to acknowledge that that itself is a charismatic form of discipline that I must responsibly accept as a gift that has power.

Dharma, I am not well versed in the Tarot, but I am familiar with card-spreads from using Jamie Sams' Animal Medicine Cards. Could you amplify on the meaning of 8-of-Swords as self center?

Also, could you clarify what you mean your last paragraph?

Thank you both again. There is so much more I could say, but this will have to be all for now.

nks

 

[dharma]

Self-Center is in reference to the specific aspect of yourself who is looking out at the world, or perhaps it would be better to say that this is the lens through which you see the issue that confronts you presently.

Since the 8 of Swords is a lack of empowerment and inhibited energy, confidence must be built up to overcome indecision and the fear of exercising your own power.

In regards to the last paragraph, the restrictions that you are imposing on yourself that cause a form of 'paralysis' in you, needs to be completely understood and worked through lest you bring it with you and project it onto your partner at a later time.

In others word, if you manage to overcome your fears and create the conditions for this relationship to evolve onto another level right now but you fail to fully work through the problem that besets you (that 8 of Swords), it will surface again later and very likely as a *projection* onto the other person.

Hope this makes more sense.

Dharma

 

[nks]

Yes, Dharma, it does.

I took your explanation of 8 of Swords and turned it right into a question:

"How can I build confidence to overcome indecision and the fear of exercising my own power?"

The answer was:

57 - the gentle (changing at the 6th place) to

48 - the well


I see this as meaning steadily, gently, and (taking into account the changing line), without penetrating to the n-th degree. (As I read the five not-changing lines, I also noticed how well I know of what they speak!)

The one thing that gave me trouble at first was the admonition to have a goal, for that is the only way that the gentleness can be steadily applied in the same direction.

But when I looked at 48, the well, I noticed how much I resonated with the "wood" imagery there, and that took me back to 60, and the note that it refers to the kind of limitation that one finds in the joints of bamboo -- in other words, segmentation.

What is the purpose of that segmentation? It's simultaneously providing supporting structure and transportation of water across its barrier. It is limitation that can move energy. Limitation as membrane.

And suddenly I realized what it is that A and I have in common: we move energy! That is how we intuitively see aspects of situations (and each other) without the usually necessary material detail.

And, given that I also am strongly disposed to habits of gathering, hoarding, and inhibiting energy, and (yes) often quite fearful of my powers to move energy, it would make sense that I tend to look up to A and miss the fact that I may well be in the leadership position.

Further, I see my fear of moving energies as the fear a circuit has of being fried by too much energy passing through. So the idea of limitations becomes the idea of the circuit breaker: attend to your weakest points as indicators of how much energy your system can handle - to be strengthened, perhaps, but only in concert with the strengthening of the overall system.

So now, I see the I Ching advice as: "Cultivate and honor your sense of yourself as a conduit, as a shaper and mover of energy. Your Work and your Being, are the same thing, and this is also so for A. Honor this in each other, and you will be able to shape an outcome in which you are as the force of two seeds in springtime rising from the ground."

And finally, the admonition in 19 (approach), that at some point all flows reverse, seems to help me to a happier understanding of the concept of the "goal." Because, yes, the living membrane, the conduit for energy, is aware that at some times it has to move things one direction, and at some times the other. That shaping, directing, moving requires a complex dance of inhibiting and encouraging, listening and speaking, in a multilayered language. Complex, yes, but to each of us in our own way, also effortless, "second nature," just like dancing.

I do not see the answer as giving me insight as to whether the outcome will be together or apart, but instead pointing toward the next stage in an intuitive link that seems to regularly connect us without being a bond.

I think it's always been a connexion not a bond because we just accept the knowledge of each other as dancers of the same dance, without ever asking anything of that knowledge, not that it prove anything, give anything, be anything, justify anything, be the same for each of us, or even stay.

We're tired now, both dancers reeling from blows, weary from the effort it's taken to do what it has come to us to do. There's promise ahead, and also likely worse to come.

What the I Ching is helping me to see, as we go through these days, and shape these changes, move this energy, is that, again, we're not going to ask anything of that knowledge that we are dancers of the same dance.

We're just going to show up. We're just going to do what we do. Two magicians, a little bit older, a little bit wiser. Something will happen, some magic.

And then, we'll dance with that.

 

[nks]

Fast forward through a week of many events. My original questions about honoring each other and right conduct in changed circumstances are all answered.

But now it is the circumstances that have come to the fore, and now, for a time there is absolutely nothing I can do but pray that A makes it through this time. I do so, even though it is not something I am accustomed to. Every moment, I am sending my thoughts and support. I find myself drying a glass, and setting it down gently, and that is my prayer. Maybe I now know what you felt Hilary, when you were discussing a situation where you were powerless to affect the outcome.
So I have huge pressing responsibilities at work, and I am so anxious, distracted, and worried that I accomplish nothing. The last time A and I were able to speak, A's last words to me were "Don't work too hard," and mine to A were, "I'll be working really hard, before I'm done."

I ask, "How can I put my energy and attention into what needs to be done at work, while I'm so frantic, anxious, distracted, and worried about A." I get the answer:

17 - Following ... unchanging

I'm away from my book, so I read the Wilhelm here and see indoors, outdoors, clinging, loosing...don't know, it all turns me back to my distraction. I feel it's saying that until there is something I can do, I need to worry less. But when you're watching the distant thunderstorm over the lake, and there is nothing you can do, but one you love is out there, how do you let go? Unchanging, unchanging... Not drawing nearer or dissapating any time soon. How do I turn my attention back to my own house at this time?

 

[dharma]

Nks, allow me to add some insight to your situation with Tarot if I may.

You have a tendency to overloading yourself and taking full responsibility for outcomes and situations that borders on obsessiveness (10 of Wands). You need to develop a better appreciation of your limits. You need to remember that the world will go on turning without you so you don't have to maintain excessive focus and carrying such a heavy load all the time. This is actually counterproductive.

Long-term projects take time and progress slowly (7 of Pentacles) so you really need to cultivate genuine trust and patience with the process. Allowing yourself to *not* think about A does not mean failure, quitting or abandonment of the relationship.

To focus on the turmoil and the limitations (5 of Swords) is to allow negative energy the upper hand and thus to overpower and control you. You must instead be a willing student --see this as an opportunity to learn while it's occuring (not just in hindsight).

There are hidden issues...matters not yet revealed (The High Priestess) and you must plumb the depths for them. Your answers lie within (not without). Some aspect of your current situation deeply touches your unconsious mind and it is time to reflect, meditate, pray and contact your inner self to make the connection.

Meditation, contemplation and becoming centered (The Hermit) are the means of making contact with the Source. Keep to yourself...turn to yourself. There is a need for solitude and introspection. The currents of the Universe flow through you. Remember, deeper truth is only found in the sounds of silence.

I hope this helps.

Dharma

 

[nks]

Thanks Dharma, it does. The turmoil has pulled me off center. It helps to be reminded that becoming centered, turning inward, does not break contact with the outer world, but instead makes clearer the deeper currents of connexion.

 

[hilary]

Hello Nks,

It's hard to know what to call a hexagram with no changing lines. 'Locked' is out (unless it's a hexagram like #12, and this isn't); even 'unchanging' is something of a misnomer. It's just very emphatic, very simple, and all the potential for change and movement is contained within the natural dynamics of a single hexagram. Perhaps it is Yi-language for '!!!!!'

#17 is the opposite of #18, which Dharma is busy living through. That means 'there is something to be done here, things you have to sort out before you can go any further...'; this - well - doesn't. You don't have a river to cross - you're not crossing the flow but going with it.

The basic image of #17 is an irresistible momentum, something that follows as naturally as one footstep follows the next. But there's also a strong tension within this idea. It can be about hunting, pursuing what you desire, the result of your own energy and enthusiasm; it is also about the flow of the time. When these two move together, you have effortlessness, like a superb athlete who is 'in the zone' and finds that perfect response comes without thought. When they don't, you will have to go with the time: there is one current, one direction, and only by according with it do you enjoy energy. I've seen this hexagram occur when people were trying to work or make things happen despite a natural slowing-down: it didn't work; they simply had to wait. There is progress hidden at the heart of this: Gradual Development, Hexagram 53, with the migrating geese gradually drawing nearer to their natural home. In other words, going with present energies might turn out to mean moving steadily towards future personal fulfilment. But that is very much the hidden core.

These two sides are reflected in Judgement and Daxiang, of course. 'Fundamental success, harvest in constancy' - these four characters draw you through from first opening contact with the source, through participating in the flow of energy, finding practical results, seeing your insights through into reality. If you are doing all this, there is no mistake (even when it feels wrong). The Daxiang is clear enough: the thunder which will bring fresh inspiration is hidden quietly in the lake: wise people recognise that there is a time for rest.

How to relate all this to your question? The basic idea is simple: there is only one current. Somehow in your experience there seem to be two - work goes one way, your preoccupation with A goes the other, so whichever way your attention focusses this is 'upstream'. There is one place that is not divided: the present moment.

I really think the answer is that simple - you need to inhabit this moment instead of the torrents of causes (which the Zagua says Following doesn't have...), effects and especially 'might be's.

Yes, this might translate into worrying less and especially feeling less responsible; it might equally mean recognising that from where you are at present, concentrating wholeheartedly on work as if nothing were happening is not realistic. I suspect it has to mean a greatly enhanced moment-to-moment awareness of yourself - I wonder what Supa associates this one with? To me it suggests walking meditation. (Also one of those things that is comically easy to write about...)

I hope this is some help.

 

[nks]

Yes, it's saying, "Ha! You think these two things are separate? Haven't you learned yet that there is only one current!" I think you're right, it's that simple. Now, instead of commenting on about each wonderful insight above (thank you!), I'll go rest and recuperate.

'night
nks

 

[nks]

Dharma,

I've just discovered a remarkable version of the tarot. It's not an oracle I've ever been drawn to, but in the effort to understand your contributions, I've been looking at some. This one is called The Enchanted Tarot (Amy Zerner & Monte Farber).

The illustrations are beautiful and dynamic -- in the words of the introduction: "The images readiate life and love and they manage to evoke the traditional meanings of the cards without ghe garish, violent pictures that frighten many away from the tarot."

The text is divided into three sections: The Dream (describes what the symbols in the image are conveying); The Awakening (a more direct stating of the lesson/significance of the card); and The Enchantment (a little ritual, chant or spell you can use to find a deeper connexion with the meaning of the card).

Have you seen this version?

 

[dharma]

Hello Nks,

I am in the habit of purchasing new Tarot decks simply because I sometimes find the artwork irresistable. Despite my visual attraction to many of them though I am unable to work with most because they simply don't resonate with my personal inner symbology.

I actually have a copy of The Enchanted Tarot deck but not the book itself. I find the imagery quite lovely but this happens to be one of the decks I am unable to really work with in any significant way. But that's just me...there's nothing to stop *you* from getting better acquainted with Tarot if you feel drawn to these particular cards yourself. Let me know how this develops for you.

Dharma