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to rescue an old friendship: 17 (1,2) 47

oponopono

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Hi everyone

I wrote a draft for an email to an old friend with whom I had issues, and we avoided each other for the last months. I told him he was more important to me than being right, that I hoped time had been our friend, and that I wish he would reply with some news. Something simple and light, to make amends. Because this friendship made me suffer many times in the past, I had been postponing it. Yesterday I had a sudden urge to send it, but didn't feel fully sure. I am ok with silence being his response, or whatever happens, but today I have been thinking a lot about these answers and the meaning of line 17,2 (58)

this was the dialogue:
What will bring to our communication if I now send this email? 17 (1,2) 47

In what way could this message promote a reconcilement? 15,3 > 2


I actually have to admit I am tense. I was asking myself "why do you leave your comfort zone and put yourself out for more bruising?!" - I have the feeling from this dialogue that I kinna had to do it, for my own sake, but it will lead us nowhere. 47 indicates the communication is exhausted. But both 17,1 and 15,3 show some pertinence in carry my initiative through. Maybe just for the sake of it, with no outcome attached. What do you think?

I shouldn't expect much, right? :duh:

If you have experience with line 17,2 I am a bit puzzled by it. It occurred to me it might depict his reaction. It's very likely that he prefers sitting on his childish tantrum (both of us were being childish...) than take the mature gesture and face my message somehow.
But if it depicts me what would you think the Y is telling me with 17,2?


well, it's sent. let's hope it's for the best...
:confused:

yoana
 

oponopono

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What will bring to our communication if I now send this email? 17 (1,2) 47

In what way could this message promote a reconcilement? 15,3 > 2

I admit I longed for some advice as I saw my post go down the page unanswered. Now Im fine, I come to share what happened. It hopefully puts those answers into perspective.

As he was silent for 3 days (aiks, I see NOW it's not that long!!!)
probably 17,2 was describing me. I gave way to insecurity, turmoil, old memories of previous fights came back, this morning I was very upset, and I was SURE that he would never say anything. So somehow I lost my mature self for my more childish self, does it make sense, 17,2 like this?

47 I don't know. It seems that the friendship is exhausted. But he did call.

He called, an hour ago, I was so surprised, given that I had decided nothing would happen. I babbled my way across the first 5 minutes. He was kind, but nothing big was discussed. Everything at the surface. It felt like two strangers stuck in an elevator trying not to remain awkwardly silent...
But at least he called, I appreciate that.
17,1 and 15,3 make sense, now looking back. But this was just about me, and did not feel he had any need for reconnecting.

During the week, as I was unstable, I also asked (way to many!) questions...
Just for learning purposes, if it serves anyone:

How did he receive this message? 19,1 > 7
Why doesn't he answer? 35 (4,6) 2
I'm suddenly so upset. What is the best I can do for myself? 10,1 > 6
What is here to learn, by returning to this "sense of pattern"? 27,1 > 23

It is clear I lost it a bit, hen? :eek:

I'm not transcribing this for feedback, just for general forum-knowledge. I feel 47 and 23 pretty much describe the outcome this had, but I see now that I had to do it. I did not feel he needs healing, for him it is a friendship from the past. I personally miss it, what we had, and wish we could see each other from time to time, but I did not feel the space in our awkward phone call to suggest that.

Well, I gave it a chance, rains comes and remorse pass :)

Now my next question is
How to move on?

I'll take 10,1 for starters
:)

thanks to all those who read!
y
 

RindaR

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What is your tiger here? what energy moved you so strongly that you re-entered this fraught relationship?

Perhaps what is being suggested (once you understand your motivation clearly), is moving one step at a time in a direction that will help you meet that need.
 

oponopono

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What is your tiger here? what energy moved you so strongly that you re-entered this fraught relationship?

I adore him. He is a selfish, self-centered, careless maniac, who has made me so sad so many times, but in the end nothing beats our conversations, our walks in the park, the traveling we did together, the books he gave me, the feedback he gives to my creative work, and how I feel when I know he is in my life. I miss him. But this feeling was not requited in the person I talked to on the phone today, one can feel those things. He was very polite, but I guess I won't ear from him again soon, and why go on writing to someone who doesn't cherish you? I gave this a chance by writing that email, and now I know better. I'm glad I did it, but it was all about facing an ugly truth. it's 17 > 47, exhaustion. I also could see how fragile I still become regarding this issue, so I won't enter into a battle I already know I'm not able to fight. Makes any sense?

Thanks for asking :)
:bows:
 

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