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Troubled love with ex boyfriend not returning my things: hex 64.4>4

Colours

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Hi. First post here. Sorry, I'm Italian, my English is so-so. Hello everybody.

Ok: me and this guy met a couple of years ago, and it was love at first sight. No doubt about it. The first 3 months we were in paradise. I had never been so happy in my whole life. And neither had he. Huge love, great sex, mutual care, wonderful conversations, sharing a lot, big projects.
I live in the South-West, he lives in the North-East (it resembles an hexagram doesn't it...?), so we started a long distance relationship, meeting every week and very joyfully. After a while things turned out pretty bad: too much attatchment on my side - due to my personal story, I needed a father rather than a partner - and on his side he was probably not ready for a full committment: moving all his life down here, change job, sell the car, rent the house, to take care of me and my daughter... Maybe it was just too much. Plus, he's had a very controlling mother, so I guess I was fascinating him, but at the same time too controlling and demanding for his taste. So after 15 months - that is, last December - he broke up with me. On the phone. «I don't believe in this relationship anymore». I broke down, of course. Which turned out to be really beneficial for my personal growth, because I finally had the occasion to take a long deep look inside my inner self and see what was lacking. I realized I was lacking a lot. So I began my «hex 18» phase - fixing things up - and «27» phase, nourishing myself rather than asking for nourishment from the outside. We stopped emailing, stopped talking on the phone, communication totally blocked. He needed silence. He's always been doing what other people expected him to do; so now, for the first time, he was finally meeting his own needs: silence.
The only thing I asked him was a meeting, and he said yes.
But he didn't say when nor where.
Of course, since communication was obstructed, I asked Yi about 2,000 questions a day, in the meantime. I got a lot of 38 and a lot of 29. God, so many 29 in those two months. I didn't think I could survive. But I did.
We finally met, in February. We met half-way between his city and my city. I looked beautiful, easy and full of love. He looked devastated. Not taken care of, at all. Tired. And he was crying. «I'm here to say goodbye». He didn't have much to say; he just said that «It didn't work». He could barely look at me. He was mourning. We didn't discuss anything. And then, after an hour of silence or so, he left. He left like «58» people leave, wind over wind, gone. He left to reach his «20» tower, to get to a place to take a long, silent look to his existence. He left and it was hexagram 19 unchanging. A funeral.
So, of course, I got back to my Yi to ask a zillion daily questions. Which didn't help. Then I joined a meditation group, which helped. But I'm still pretty obsessed.
I sent him a beautiful, reasonable email to ask him to keep in touch in this mourning period. No answer.
Then, a few days later, I got myself together and packed all his things up. Clothes, shoes, shaving foam and all that kind of stuff that guys keep around you when they claim they love you INFINITELY and they're supposed to marry you pretty soon. He is a physician, so he's supposed to know how much an INFINITE is.
I had no anger at all, while packing. My heart was broken, but, as Sting sings, «If you love somebody, set him free», or something like that. I felt it was the right choice. I Ching agreed on that.

The point is: he hasn't sent me MY things back yet. Even though I thoroughfully sent him a list of the things I need back. It's been two months now, and these things of mine don't seem to be on their way. He isn't playing his part in the ceremony. Which obviously does not help me to claim this relationship over. I still love him. I still miss him. A lot. Infinitely. I'm doing my best to stand clear of the coins, but it's tough.

In fact... Is he going to return?
Hex 53 unchanging. Seems so.
Not a good answer, because it builds up expectations. And I don't need expectations. I know what I need. I need to dwell in my 37 (my family), in my 59 (unselfishness, let go, relax the grip), in my 24 (find my own source - I'm getting that 24 a lot!), in my 39 (accept the hardship), in my 16 (easy, baby...) and so on. I don't need to wait for him. Hell no.

So, why hasn't he sent me my stuff yet?

Hex 64.4.
Not Yet Across.
It changes to 4, Not Knowing.

And by the way: What's the potential in this relationship?

8.3.5 to 15.

Your kind help would be much appriciated. Thanks.

(At least I'm talking to actual human beings... That's some improvement!).


Love love love,

Colours
 

steve

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Hi
Break ups are the worst and if you are chinger its nearly impossible not to keep casting, but you need to, when you look back you will say " what was I thinking".
I know , when first joined the forum i drove everyone crazy about this one girl, i think somebody even said come on enough already? In fact it was the break up that brought me here, then i started drinking online, it was quite a performance, so i was doing the same thing with the casting however i did learn allot about the hexgrams i must say.
64.4 I think is saying clothes or no clothes you need to move on with this, like you are saying you shouldnt wait because you are wasting your life and time is gold. You need to finalise this in your own mind then you can have good future sooner as the line says you will.
8.3 is saying he is not the one , i think deep down you may know that and 8.5 is well i thinkis saying stop putting your heart out there only to be squashed again.
The line talks about an ancient hunting sport where the animals were given a chance to escape only the ones that put themselves in harms way or line of sight were shot, do you want to be that animal?
8 is an indication of what was or the union that you had, thats how i see the reading.

So like many of us before you and many after you you need to get on with it, just what you wanted to hear (not) but in hindsight it will be best.
Just a note on why he may not have returned your stuff, it could be he doesnt want to deal with it or cant be bothered or maybe planning to.
If you really want your stuff then maybe just give it sometime and say hey look i need my stuff back it costs money, then he will see there is no other motive.
Dont go into the mild stalking phase any form of it , he has made it clear to be honest it probably got nothing to with you, it could be he just wants to be in his home town or something else.
If you met him then you can meet someone else, ask the Yi how do i get through this ? then hopefully you will be back on track to meet the right person.

just a note on that girl i was so hung up on, i am so grateful now she broke up with me

Steve
 

Colours

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Thanks Steve. Thanks for sharing.

I see hex 8 as: I'm badly looking for a connection with him. Now.

8.3: he's not the one. Either: he's not ready now. Either: thinking he's the one is not the right attitude at the moment.

8.5: I do not have to force people to come to me. Who is meant to be with me will come on his own. Eventually.

15: lessen passionate involvement and increase a quiet inner strenght to find some peace of mind.

64: he hasn't made the crossing yet. He hasn't taken the leap.
6.4: ?
4: he doesn't know what to do. I don't know what's coming next. But hey, we don't have to know. Not knowing is ok. Destiny will unfold.

Hugs. Thanks.
 

Sixth Relative

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Hi Colours (Nice nickname, btw)

In fact... Is he going to return?
Hex 53 unchanging.

I've found that Wen Wang Gua is more accurate for predictive questions.

From WWG perspective, it seems not, he's not going back to the relationship. Sorry
a) When asking if something is going to happen, an unchanging hexagram means "no action", therefore, is not going to happen. There is one exception: if the earthly branch of the day when you got the answer clashes with the earthly branch of any of the 6 lines, and that line being in the Strong or Associated stage in the seasson. So, it seems like he won't return, but to be sure it would be neccesary to know the date and hour when you tossed the coins.
b) When an woman ask about a man for romantic issues, the Host line represents the woman, the Official/Husband relative represents the man and the Guest Line represent his feelings. In 35, the Host line is Shen (metal) and the Official/Husband is the same line than the Guest line, it is Mao (wood). The Official/Husband relative in the Guest line means he does love you. But since fire controls metal, even if he loves you the relation is not good for him, somehow it hurts him. To know if there is a chance for him to overcome this obstacle it would be necessary to know the day and hour when you tossed the coins.


So, why hasn't he sent me my stuff yet?

Hex 64.4.
From a text-based perspective, he hasn't close the mourning cycle. He's not ready yet.


And by the way: What's the potential in this relationship?

8.3.5 to 15.
From a text-based perspective, it doesn't seem to have potential for a romantic one; at most, there is a potential for friendship but most probably the potential is for you letting him go away.

It's never easy to give bad news; hopefully you'll continue to nourish yourself and get brighter days in your horizon

Wish you all the best
 
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D

diamanda

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Hi Colours,
In my experience 53 unchanging shows that a process which has already started, steadily continues in the same manner, and takes long to complete. So sadly I don't think he will turn back / return.
 

Colours

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Hi guys,
thanks for your support.

I think everything happens for a good reason, so basically I don't believe in bad news. Any news is good news. Of course, dealing with the news can be very hard at times.

A few days ago I asked Yi how this relationship looks to him and I got 61.2.6>3.

So I thought: he's really, deeply thinking about it (61); he has genuine, loving and tender feelings for me (line 2); but can't make such a high-level committment (line 6). [Or maybe line 6 is talking to me: I'm carried away with enthusiasm while there's no real substance in this relationship (but why do lines talk to somebody else all of a sudden? I asked about HIM so I assume this line is about HIM. Right?).]
Hex 3: He thinks our relationship will sprout again, afresh, one day, somehow, through hardship.

53 unchanging: ok, got it. No action.
But why 53?
If he's not coming back, why didn't I get a 6 unchanging? a 38 unchanging? a 59 unchanging? a 29 unchanging? An anything-else unchanging? I mean, why did I get a «gradually achieving a desired marriage» hexagram?

And yes, I will continue to nourish myself. With or without him. Definitely.
Thank you, guys <3

C.
 

Colours

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P.S.
The «Wen Wang Gua» system is far beyond my possibilities :)
 

Colours

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Whoops - I did it again.
I casted one more question.
«Why isn't he giving this relationship a second chance?».
I got 30.4>22.
Hexagram 30, to me, means contact. Passion. Clarity. Fire over fire. A burning fire that represents the central place of the person or situation you're asking of. A fire that brings about light and clarity and warmth. Without this wood, your life would dwindle. So you are submitted to that fire. It's the pivotal point you have built part of your personal story around. You can't do without. And that is very clear.
Line 4: sometimes we live wonderful situations that don't stay that way very long. It looks like he was consumed by my fire. In fact, by the end of the relationship he looked exhausted. Literally burnt down. He only needed silence, peace, solitude. He now has to understand what in this relationship was really giving him nourishment and pleasure, and what was wearing him out, then choose a long-term destination to go. Decisions must be made.

22: Semplicity. Make things beauiful and graceful. He's a very calm, patient man, so his life has to reflect the simple expression of his nature.

Sleep tight everybody.
 

Sixth Relative

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Hi Colours

53 unchanging: ok, got it. No action.
But why 53?

Please, keep in mind this interpretation "unchanging = no action" is from a WWG perspective. With a text-based interpretation could be different.

For instance, in Ricardo Andree's teachings, an unchanging hexagram doesn't mean "no action" but an "objective change": there is change, there is action, but in a way that your free will doesn't has much room to direct where the situation is going to. Things are going this way regardless what you do.

Now, again with a WWG perspective, a 29 unchanging also means no action, but without the "he does love you" nuance; in 29, he won't get back because there is an open clash, there are fights, quarrels; and in 29, in the Guest line (his feelings) instead of Husband relative there is a Wife relative, meaning he has feelings for another woman. In 38 unchanging, it also means no, and it also has the "he does love you" because The Husband relative is in the Guest line; but in 38 the Guest line is fire and the Host line is metal (just the inverse than in 53), so instead of the relation hurting him, in 38 the relation hurts her.

Yes, I know WWG is strange for people used to the text-based method; and it is quite complex and difficult. But then again, I've found the text-based method can easily be misleading when the question is a predictive one (it is far better than WWG for questions asking for insight or for questions asking for advice or strategy). I've seen a lot of 1 unchanging and 2 unchanging predicting a divorce in WWG while with the text-based method you can read it as a good sign for a couple; and 3 to 4 months latter, the couple actually divorce.

With a text-based method, you can say as diamanda: the situation will continue to evolve as it has been (so, no coming back) but it can easily be read as 53 is about achieving marriage, then this is a good sign for coming back together. So, how would you know which metaphore is right between those 2?

Best wishes
 

Colours

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Thanks, Sixth Relative. You're very nice.

Talking about second chances, I will give the WWG method a second chance. Or should I say, a first chance. It just seemed very complicated. I also want to understand the Guest Line-Host Line practice better, too, because I have no clue about it and the whole thing sounds very interesting. (I never studied I Ching. I get the sense of castings through intuition. But a flood of emotions would totally overbalance my intuition, sometimes, so methods turn out very valuable there).
I think sometimes it's good not to know what's going on. That way we can grow into that situation we don't know much about. Truly grow. We learn to develop trust, acceptance. And most importantly, we get in touch with our inner source. The inner self, the source of pleasure. Not knowing, we train ourselves to respond joyously to any situation. We're compelled to open our heart more and more. Once more.
The lesson I'm learning here is to feel ok with myself regardless this guy. If I knew he's coming back, the lesson wouldn't be as effective. Plus, I think everything can change - and must change - as long as we allow a change of heart. Otherwise, why would it be called 'The Book of Changes'?

Good night. Thanks to all for your kindness.
 

Sixth Relative

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Hi Colours

It just seemed very complicated.
It is!!!! :deadhorse: :rofl:
I start learning WWG decades ago; I studied and tried for 2 or 3 years and drop it :brickwall: I went back to it more than 10 years latter

I also want to understand the Guest Line-Host Line practice better, too, because I have no clue about it and the whole thing sounds very interesting.
Yeah, it is quite interesting.

This comes (IMO) from Qimen Dunjia [another complex yet amazing tool for divinations] and helps to asses the relation between 2 parts (either persons, countries, political parties in elections, teams in sports, etc).

From militar imaginery, the Host is the army in defensive strategy and Guest is the invading army (what a rude Guest, right? :D ). Then you compare their strength and mutual relation with the 5 elements (productive, destructive or reductive).

In Weng Wang Gua, every hexagram has a Subject line, also known as Self line or Host line and 2 lines away their respective Object line or Other line or Guest. Every book on Wen Wang Gua has a table to identify them.

I think sometimes it's good not to know what's going on.
You bet!!! Mainly because of the risk to adopt a fatalistic attitude towards your own life. It is my understanding that the Yijing is a tool to use our free will in a responsible and effective way, not an excuse
to avoid taking responsibility for our own life. If/when using the Yijing leads you to a fatalistic mindset, drop it!!! :deadhorse:

The lesson I'm learning here is to feel ok with myself regardless this guy.
:bows:

Good night!
 

canislulu

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What stands out to me in my first consideration of this thread is that you perhaps made an error. Colours, you said:

He left like «58» people leave, wind over wind, gone.

Isn't Hexagram 58 Lake over Lake and not wind over wind ?

I know that you did not cast 58, but somehow it washed up onto the shore of your consciousness.

Why not imagine what it would be like to already have what you want and live as if that were true even though it isn't? I know it sounds like New Age Advise, but honestly, it is simply that interpretation I have of what Yi is telling you based on what stands out in this thread.

Lake over Lake ---- leaving like being swallowed by a whale to be spit up where he belongs. And what belongs to you will come your way. What would it be like to live in the certainty of that?
 
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rosada

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If you really want your stuff back I think 64.4 is telling you it's going to take more effort on your part. Like the I Ching telling the Young Fool of hexagram 4 that he's already received his answer, I believe your friend feels he's already given you his final goodbye (maybe even already disposed of your things?), and if you are going to get any belongings back you'll have to go to his house (64.4 go to the Demon Country) to get them.
 

rosada

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Thinking about this some more -

Interesting that 64.4 leads to 4.
Hexagram 4 is the first hexagram to describe the person going off on a real life experience. I mean, hex1 and 2 are sort of about planing the life, and hex 3 is about getting it all set up and then hex 4 is you step into it, you're launched for better or worse.
So having 64.4 lead to 4 (Before Completion and then the New Fool) is like 64.4 is some sort of final exam that determines where the Young Fool will enter the next lifetime. What skeletons, what unfinished business/lessons does he bring with him? Did the Fool learn anything new this last lifetime? Like, to take care of those final boring chores like writing thank you notes and returning stuff? Cause if he didn't, if he is stuck in old habit patterns, if he didn't demonstrate any learning, then he'll just be reborn into the same situation again, fall in love with the same type, be fated to re-enact the play yet again (ie. in your case the fellow has an overly possessive mother and then falls in love with an over-possessive girlfriend - and yet in the final moment HE is the one who is "over possessive"! Will he get it or will he have to do it all again?) On the other hand if he can battle his old habits, his inertia, is oblivious lack of good manners, and blaze new trails (return the stuff!!!) his next experience with love will reflect his new understanding.

So... Why is he hanging on to your stuff? Who knows but I think the IC is advising you to have the attitude that he's not hanging on to it for sentimental reasons. He's just got some bad habits and thus you can either go there and get it yourself or not but YOU need to complete this in your own head so you can move on.
And NOW, not in three years!
 
V

Vissino

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Hex 53 unchanging is really weird. When I had a relationship with my ex I asked how our relationship is going to develop.. I received 53 unchanging and after some period of time we broke up. I'm really confused about it.
 

rosada

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Well maybe consider 53uc comes after 52.Keeping Still. Indeed, 52.6 sounds pretty self contained and content. So maybe after 52.Keeping still, 53. unchanging means there's no motivation to make further Progress? Or maybe when a hexagram is unchanging we shouldn't look at the lines at all but just at the Judgement and the Image. The Image of 53. doesn't seem to describe partnership, but rather someone who is complete within themselves.
 

rosada

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New thought!
Maybe 53. unchanging emphasizes that moment when a person considers who they are going to partner with. Like 52.6 Keeping Still could mean that point where you realize you are content with yourself AND THEN the next consideration is, "Well, as I've gotten as close to perfection as I can go on my own, now the next step is to consider a partner." So 53. uc is that point where you are conscious that to make further Progress, you'll need a partner. In fact the Image suggests someone consciously considering "Who should I couple with in order to improve the gene pool (the mores)?"

So I speculate 53uc it doesn't necessarily mean the partnership you are in is going to progress - only that your soul is now at a choice point of weighing whether you're a good fit. Are we made for each other? If not this hex unchanging could indicate no progress.
 

Colours

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I wrote a long reply to everbody but it looks like it's lost. What a shame. I'm not very skilled with this chatroom yet. Sorry.

If you really want your stuff back I think 64.4 is telling you it's going to take more effort on your part. Like the I Ching telling the Young Fool of hexagram 4 that he's already received his answer, I believe your friend feels he's already given you his final goodbye (maybe even already disposed of your things?), and if you are going to get any belongings back you'll have to go to his house (64.4 go to the Demon Country) to get them.

No, I don't think so. I don't feel like I have to make a move. He has to. It's his ceremony. I want to show some respect here.
But thanks for your insight, it was interesting to read.

Thanks everybody!
Have a beautiful day.

Colours
 

rosada

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I hope you'll let us know!
 

long yi

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April 5th, 2016, 08:22 PM (Time of the reading)

起卦时间:2016年04月05日02时22分
起卦农历:丙申年二月廿八日丑时
神煞:天乙—酉亥 福星—酉 日禄—午 羊刃—巳 驿马—亥 桃花—午 华盖—丑
干支:丙申年 壬辰月 丁巳日 辛丑时
旬空:辰巳  午未  子丑  辰巳

六神  伏神    坤宫:水地比(归魂) 8    兑宫:地山谦 15
         【本 卦】           【变 卦】
青龙       ▅▅ ▅▅ 妻财戊子水 应   ▅▅ ▅▅ 子孙癸酉金  
玄武       ▅▅▅▅▅ 兄弟戊戌土  ○→ ▅▅ ▅▅ 妻财癸亥水 世
白虎       ▅▅ ▅▅ 子孙戊申金     ▅▅ ▅▅ 兄弟癸丑土  
滕蛇       ▅▅ ▅▅ 官鬼乙卯木 世×→  ▅▅▅▅▅ 子孙丙申金  
勾陈       ▅▅ ▅▅ 父母乙巳火     ▅▅ ▅▅ 父母丙午火 应
朱雀       ▅▅ ▅▅ 兄弟乙未土     ▅▅ ▅▅ 兄弟丙辰土  

Without looking into the details.
Hexagram 29 is six strike hexagram kan water.
This type of hexagram is bad for relationship meaning that the relationship will not become a long term partnership because the six line (1/4, 2/5/, 3/6) are in conflict.

Heaxgram 15 is a hexagram with five yin lines and one yang line at line 3 of hexagram 15. The image is that the male has many female friends (five yin lines). Line 15.3 is the male and line 3 is body secret part sex organ. Thus other females may see him the possible target of pursuit.

line 8.2 parent si fire and 15.2 is wu fire is the relationship line (marriage line). Si fire is the empty element under the year 2016 and wu fire is the empty element under the month April 2016. When used in combination, the relationship has no hope of being real with any level of success at this time and also in 2016.

8.3 officer mao wood is the officer line (him or any male being considered) changes into child line shen metal. The analysis is as follows: The man pursues someone younger (female) or has a connection to a child.

The young female shen metal (if I assume it is a younger female) merges with your house of spouse which is the day of the reading si fire. This means the man you are interested in has a direct connection to a younger female. This is where he is heading or already in such situation.

Since 8.3 is a change line, this matter is in progress. Since he is mao wood, the event started in March (mao wood month) 2016.

The officer line cannot be found in hexagram 15. He is not in the picture (ending part). line 8.2 parent si fire and 15.2 is wu fire is the relationship line (marriage line). From si fire to wu fire is a step forward. Wu fire is connected to word "fling". Therefore such relationship is turning into a short term fling between you two.

8.3 is the host line; 8.6 is the guest line. You have him in mind (officer host line). He has female zi water in mind. The female may not be you (his mom or other female).He is in line 6 with the female in mind which means that he is located far away from you.

8.5 is sibling xu earth which changes into female hai water. Hai water has the movement associated with it. Sibling can be a rival who pushes a female aside. This rival also has a fling star attached to it.
15.6 is a child line you metal which couples with your host of marriage (month of the reading chen earth). The younger female took the spot in your house of marriage.

8.3 and 8.6 are both yin line, meaning that you and he are very pessimistic about this relationship.
From the various indicator, you will not be chosen one for him if he is looking for a spouse. It also implies that life moves on for you because you have never place high hope on the relationship given the various parameters.

Hexagram 29 means dispute inside a family. Both of you also have secrets that each party cannot share with the other party. You cannot tell him how you feel about it and so is he. There may be good sexual compatibility, but from the perspective of both sex and materialistic issues, problems start to emerge. It is painful situation for both without a marriage in sight. Money and financial security are also serious issues.

You should consider moving on and let matter slowly collapse and be forgotten.
Hexagram 15 also has the hidden meaning of 8 of swords in Tarot cards.

Quote:
She stands rigid, her mind a racing nightmare of imaginings and delusions. Inside, a hysteria is building and she is close to panic. She can’t think straight. She feels helpless and powerless. If she could just let her mind calm a bit and begin to think rationally then she could start to form a plan of escape. If she could just see what we see, just for a moment, she would probably have a good laugh. Yes, yes, she is blindfolded and bound, that is true, but what of her feet, they are not tied. She can move her feet and because they are so close to the Water (her emotions), she can feel her way slowly and sense what is around her.

With regards to relationships, the presence of The Eight of Swords does not bode well. This card speaks of feeling trapped in a relationship and not knowing what to do about it. You may feel you want to leave but that there are too many restrictions or obstacles standing in your way. Deep unhappiness comes with this Card and a feeling of being totally stifled. if you really want out that bad, then you do have the freedom to go even if you have to leave everything behind.
Unquote

You are free to get out of it. Although your action moves out, the mind is still trapped. It will take time to understand that you are dealing with a male with many female friends and there are younger female rivals. He does not care where it ends.
 

Colours

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Hi, you are so sweet dedicating time and energy to my casting. Thank you.
I feel trapped, it's true. The «child» he could have in mind might be my daughter. He's actually - geographically - far away from me (700 kilometres or so) and he might have many female friends, ok, but I sense he's still thinking of me, yet with a pessimistic overview on the whole thing. He's keeping my stuff, holding onto some memory or kind of presence of mine. I'm sure this was a significant relationship for the both of us. Well, fair enough. The point is, I have to move on. I have to «feel my way slowly and sense what is around me». I like that line.
My Dad abandoned me when I was a child and didn't recognize my love and worth, so this (abandonment, blocked communication) is a big issue for me. Guilt and loss and desperation are involved in the process.
I guess I have to work it out inside my inner self. It's always like that, isn't it.
Thanks everybody for your time and warmth.
Really.

Love and joy to you all,

Colours
 

steve

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Hey
I just wanted to say I can see you are hurt in the way you write but at the same time you are still quite grounded in the reality of the situation, so from outside perspective you appear quite strong for someone not feeling so well, if you can focus on the moving on, the reading did give a positive outcome initally.
At least the breakup brought you here to the forum or your first post, you seem to have a good grasp of the Iching and this is a great place to learn more, its good you have came.

Steve
 

Colours

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Thanks Steve.

Well, the point is: «dropping» people is just not my habit. Expecially the loved ones. It's not my style to throw them down the toilet, judging them, hating them, disrespecting them, putting them down in order to feel OK. Not that anybody suggested this; but we all agree that an exit strategy is required, and I don't know how to figure it out. It just doesn't sound ok to just forget and let go, so I need to try something different. When communication is obstructed, there's nothing much you can do except working on what's under your control, resolving your pain, staying humble, until you have a greater control. Seeking after people who want to be on their own is never a good idea, so here I stay, hexagram 52, stilling. And waiting. I've always been obsessed over other people's thoughts and feelings, and I usually do my very best to patch things up, so it's very painful to feel cut off. That's probably a good lesson to learn here. Moving on... how? How can I leave behind a relationship that I don't feel is over yet? But that's my problem. Maybe one day I will call it over, no matter if my stuff was returned or not. My goal is to treasure these deep, true feelings for this guy without being obsessed over his moves, or thinking about him every freaking minute, or doubting the truth of what we shared. I don't want to get rid of memories and feelings. Feelings have to find their place. What place? Time will tell.

Thanks for welcoming me in this community so nicely.
Sleep tight.

Colours
 

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