What if I transition?

[Jescilito]

Hello all. Thanks for taking the time to look at my Iching reading. I'm a biological male, considering transitioning into living as a female.I asked "what if I transition?"I got 4, 6 in the 1, changing to 41.Both these figures are a little ambiguous.I've heard 4 usually comes up when you shouldn't be asking the question.My interpretation of these figures left me questioning my morals and sincerity. It did however leave me with the feeling that I should proceed.6 in the 1st seems to be saying I have a long way to go and I need to make a lot of other changes first.41 seems to be saying that in the end by losing something I'll gain much fortune.Thoughts are appreciated. Iching still leaves me scratching my head sometimes until I follow it's advice and see it unfold.

 

[Trojina]

Hello all. Thanks for taking the time to look at my Iching reading. I'm a biological male, considering transitioning into living as a female.I asked "what if I transition?"I got 4, 6 in the 1, changing to 41.Both these figures are a little ambiguous.I've heard 4 usually comes up when you shouldn't be asking the question.My interpretation of these figures left me questioning my morals and sincerity. It did however leave me with the feeling that I should proceed.6 in the 1st seems to be saying I have a long way to go and I need to make a lot of other changes first.41 seems to be saying that in the end by losing something I'll gain much fortune.Thoughts are appreciated. Iching still leaves me scratching my head sometimes until I follow it's advice and see it unfold.

4 doesn't only show up when you shouldn't be asking the question - it's simply Not Knowing.

You ask 'what if I transition ?' and well what does 'what if' mean here really ? How do you mean 'what if' ? I guess you know what you mean or do you ?

I mean 4 shows this really isn't something you can know about now in advance - you can't see, you need to find out as much as you can and yet even finding out you can't know now how it will be.

The line says from Hilary's translation in wiki

‘Sending out the ignoramus,
Harvest in making use of punishing people,
In making use of loosening fetters and handcuffs.
Going on in this way is shameful.’

I agree with your take on line 1 and thank you for including your take on your reading. You said

.6 in the 1st seems to be saying I have a long way to go and I need to make a lot of other changes first

Yes you need to drive out the ignoramus by looking into this more but what you don't want this to include is anything that hampers you in expressing your ignorance. You must feel free, unshackled to go and explore this as much as you need to prior to making any decisions. What do you think the fetters and the handcuffs are here ? You are quite aware you don't have enough information or awareness, you are ready to sort of discipline or teach that part of you but perhaps your understanding at this point is hindered by self judgement, which might be even restricting your exploration of this area.

I don't know exactly what the fetters are, you will likely have a clearer idea of what these might be.

Not sure about how 4.1 connects to 41 in meaning so I will hop over to wikiwing where I see Hilary usually has a comment on it.

 

[Trojina]

Ah Hilary says it could be line 1 is connected to 41 in the sense of being willing to offer up one's ignorance.

One can be shackled by not being willing or able to offer up the full extent of one's not knowing. I think practically maybe you really need to feel far more free to explore what this might be like for you. Don't be afraid to go and talk or write to others who have transitioned - don't mind the sacrifice(41) of fully sharing the extent to which you are in the dark about what this means for people and about what it could mean for you. You aren't obliged to take this step when you need to be sharing so much more and learning about the implications of the decision.

I notice myself how often if I don't know something I shackle myself by not expressing I don't know and asking. Often after asking I'm glad I asked and am aware of the heaviness of those shackles once they are cast off. I can think of so many instances where not knowing felt heavy and for some reason -usually something connected to shame- I felt it would be better not to ask/admit/share ignorance. I think the nature of shackles can be their weight feels so familiar one hesitates to cast them off.

Reminds me of being with a group of people talking about something I have no idea about but rather than say 'I really have no idea what you are referring to' I might sit and nod and say 'yes' wisely whereas the whole exchange could be enriched if I made the sacrifice of saying I didn't know. That's a small example of course and your situation is far bigger so can you identify what those shackles are you need to lose so this youth in you can go ahead and be free to learn ?

 

[rosada]

I see hex. 4 as indicating a situation where a person cannot learn anything more about a situation by asking questions, they must get out there and experience it. It's like hex.3 Difficulty at the beginning is all about finding partners and role models to discuss things with, to exchange knowledge and experience, but ultimately at 3.6 Bloody tears flow, one reaches the recognition that neither you nor the person you consult with knows the answer and the only way to find the answer is to take the question out of the theoretical zone and come down to earth and learn the answer not from consulting others but from one's own experience.

The first line of any hexagram represents how conditions are at the beginning or even before one gets into the situation. So 4.1 is that time before you've taken any major step and are asking for guidance but in this situation you can't receive any guidance from others. One can only learn so much from those who would have us stay at home or in school till we're "older" or "know more". (I think it's kind of a repeat of hex1.3 leading to 1.4, the lines that has the person furiously studying round the clock and the tentatively starting out on his own, wavering over the depths.)

Anyway, I think you are being advised that you can learn a lot from talking to others but nothing will compare to the real experience.
HOWEVER... I sure wouldn't take this to mean you should take this step. I see this as simply saying you can ask all the questions you want but you can't really know until you do it. Perhaps it is an encouragement to take small steps and see what happens next. Perhaps the change line 41. Decrease means that making this change will release the shackles mentioned in 4.1. Perhaps you will feel free to be who you really are. Or could it mean living as a female will "decrease" the opportunities and privileges that come with being male, and that you should consider these ramifications as you consider the possibilities?

 

[Jescilito]

Thanks for all the help. Your points are all well laid out and not unlike what I thought from my little research.I Guess to reiterate when asking "what if I transition?" it was in a context of being successful and content with my decision.As far as the shackles go, there is a lot that stands in my way. Right now actually typing this just made me thing of the changing lines shackles and the figure changing into decrease.Basically, I would lose what little bit of family and friends I have left. My SO is already mortified that I might be transgender. So to carry it out in my current situation would be humiliating.Really the only way I could approach it was if I were to be completely willing to risk losing everything. If I'm looking at 41 correctly it could mean the things I'd gain would be worth it.Ultimately I feel like the oracle was trying to tell me if course I'd be successful at it, it's just that I'm not ready. I have to prepare myself by doing small things in the moment instead of making big plans for the future.Maybe little by little I can find myself the right moment, free of restraints.If I do decide to go through with it I guess I stand to lose a lot, but perhaps the benefit wins in the long run because the although the figure stands for loss it seems positive.

 

[pooja123]

I have a lot of friends whom transitioned chemically but didn't opt for sex change. The question is are you willing to have a sex change or just be a Lady boy? In order to be happy with yourself, you may need to be away from your family for awhile until they have learnt to accept you for who you are. It is good to seek counselling and find out what you really need in order to be happy with the inner you and the outer you. Many whom have had transitioned also lost their libido and the sense of fulfillment too. They felt , the change didn't match what they wanted. So try transitioning via hormones first. Live as a female for few years and then decide how you want to live your life permanently. Ask yourself if this really is a gender disphoria or just the need to cross dress and live like a female regardless of what sexual orientation you are leaning towards? I have several transitioned ladies who didn't go for sex change because they felt that their genitals need not that change. Some felt that they are women whom are attracted to women and therefor, they felt they shouldn't change their genitals. They still went for hormones. The definition of gender has definitely changed. It includes all sort of possibilities. The same goes with sexual orientation. When you are aware of these things , you are able to tell your significant other and she or he will understand you and support your decision.

 

[sylvia1ching]

Jescilito

HEX 4 is about learning a lesson and asking for a mentor. HEX 4.1 gives the impression that you are not asking the question you need to ask. You are not asking for what you want to know. You get to be more disciplined in what you want. I interpret it as saying you are not being strong in your question. What is it that you really want to know? Coy is for virgins... I heard that in a movie one time.

What is the "what if" .. so if you do transitions, what are you afraid of? What is behind the what if for you?

 

[Trojina]

When you are aware of these things , you are able to tell your significant other and she or he will understand you and support your decision.

Well not necessarily. I mean it can't be presumed the significant other will support the decision. I guess some will and some won't.