What's the reason?

[hellomoon]

My brother and his g.f. have been together over ten years, they share a one year old beautiful little boy. I thought they would marry but he doesn't want to and left her heart broken. He didn't give her a clear explanation only that he wants to 'find himself' and doesn't want to be with her anymore. I don't understand. Things seemed fine according to her, she never knew he was unhappy. I asked What is the reason he doesn't want to be with her? I got hexagram 14.4.5.6 changing to 5.Line 5 I feel it may be speaking of the relationship being too much for him? Apparently this hex speaks of a good relationship. Hexagram 5 is called waiting; perhaps he will eventually come around if she waits?

 

[hellomoon]

Maybe I am biased but I wonder if this will be sort of a test of their relationship, especially as 5 means waiting. 14 is called Wealth, maybe he will eventually see what he has lost?

 

[Piscean]

I'm not too sure about the lines, but the Waiting part seems to be a good indication for when he said he wants to 'find himself', he may feel the timing is wrong, he doesn't feel like taking decisive actions in his life, he needs room maybe even for something different to come in


With wealth, he could be seeking something that feels more enriching to him, perhaps he feels the need to let go of anything dead set in stone to allow more in

 

[diamanda]

What is the reason he doesn't want to be with her?
14.4.5.6 > 5.

"Find himself" after 10 years and a child together - that's a cheap pathetic excuse.

14.4 says that something is outside one's domain, or, someone who hides their brilliance.
14.5 shows a domineering woman.
14.6 shows bliss.
And 5 shows (among other things) need.
The hidden lines speak of good luck if the pig is castrated (or, in more modern terms, if the man is forced to keep his trousers zipped), and also of the need for the 'wife' to be more obedient.

So, what is the reason he doesn't want to be with her - perhaps your sister should figure out a way to balance her non-assertiveness with her assertiveness? And, she should somehow make him need her, somehow make him wait.

Either this, or he has met a woman who knows exactly how to be half 'submissive' but in essence she is domineering, and he feels he needs her.

 

[hellomoon]

Hi guys. I just saw this. So sorry for not responding. I know it is tragic. There are times he feels he needs her (his g.f. of ten years) but he wants out. I doubt there is another woman, at least in a serious way. I hope my brother comes to his senses, this is absolutely ridiculous. . I am so angry. We all are. I hope the waiting part means with time he will snap out of this funk he is in and does the proper thing and goes back to her. Thanks so much. I will update you guys. I am going back home to Christmas.

 

[equinox]

Hello hellomoon

diamanda and Piscean already gave an interpretation on your request to read the mind of a third party. I think it is also possible that your result tells you how to deal with him in this situation. And so I will try to interpret the answer. This gives you a few perspectives; diamanda's, Piscean's and mine -- which are all quite different from each other -- to think about, if you like.

14.4 - It is not up to you to dominate -- let him go his own way and allow him make his own decisions. Don't be mad at him. This is about his life and not yours. The heart wants, what the heart wants. Even if he has built up a family, it is his right to re-evaluate his life situation.

14.5 -- Even if it is not up to you to dominate: You have a great influence on him, maybe greater than you suspect. So be well-meaning to him and try to be an understanding counselor.

14.6 In the end heaven will help. Whatever that means here -- this is certainly one of the best lines of the I-Ching and suggests a positive outcome.

Of course, it sounds like the most reasonable thing to end these nerve-wracking times of uncertainty and finally come back. But don't try to bring him to "reason". People tend to feel misunderstood then, which may lead to the circumstance, that they get more confused and that the process of introspection lasts even longer.