When?

[cutiecat]

In my childhood I shared something with my dad - about my wants - and his reply back gave me an idea that I'm not good enough to get what I want - looks, brains whatever. Since then i never ever got I wanted in life. I got things - but I do not want them, wrong boyfriends, wrong though high payed job. I've been waiting and waiting t fot things to change but the Universe keeps offering me things and people that have nothing to do with me or not my equals ( not my words). I can not wait any longer so I said When will I get what I want and need? Naturally got 39.3.4 to 45.
I have absolutely no idea on how to interperet it. Obviosuly some diffulties are there. Hopefully someone can provide their perspetive on that?

I ching is way over my head. I need the date.

Sincerely,
-CC

 

[steve]

hello there

The lines say to me that you need to think carefully in future about the choices you make, in relation to people and paths you take in general. You need not to rush into situations, just because it maybe feels good at the time, dont get swept away in the moment, do the pros & cons if you think it could be a life changing situation such as a relationship or a job that pays well but you may not like.

Look at it as a puzzle and think if this person or situation may fit in within your over all happiness.

These things are easily said but harder done so you really need to beconcious of these influences.

Its like with my firends that say come on lets go to the pub and I jump in the car like a puppy dog going for fun even tho I know i shouldnt, then the next day when i have a hangover and have spent too much money and cant function who's fault is that, them for influencing me or mine for getting in the car? Its mine no-one forced me.

I am just trying to simplify this for you. These are your choices not matter what.

The good news is if you create this path now then the end result will be that you will be surrounded by your own kind of people. If you dont you will remain where you are now unhappy with the situation.

The hex 39 is about being obstructed and 45 is i think in this case being surrounded by the right people and not feeling like a stranger in a strange land.

Good luck

Steve

 

[gato]

When will I get what I want and need?

39.3.4 -> looks to me that you don't need what you want. to be more explicit, what you want and what you really need are two different things.

 

[willowfox]

Cravings and obsessions lead to unhappiness and sadness, therefore the lines are advising you to just stop lusting after the "things" that you think you need, as you have shelter, food, a job, money etc. You are not a millionaire but then neither am I, and it doesn't concern me as I make do with what I have and what people give me, I don't lust after dreams. I wanted many "things" as well but I never got them and never will but c'est le vie.

If you are standing permanently on the fringes of society, many opportunities will pass you by, therefore it suggests a need to integrate into society, meet people, make friends, get well known then your universe will flower.

The time is down to you, as you need to change your outlook and that can take months or years, its up to you to realize you having been going the wrong way in life.

 

[rosada]

Very interesting response.
39. Obstruction is made up of the Mountain trigram below, suggesting some sort of limit or obstruction, and the Water trigram above, suggesting a fast hurtling river so the feeling is of being held back so one doesn't get swept away by these fast moving energies. I think of a person standing on a street corner waiting for a break in the traffic so they might safely cross. It's obviously not healthy to rush forward blindly in such circumstances, yet one does wonder, "When will the traffic slow down, when is it going to be MY TURN?"

The Image specifically advises the superior man does not put the blame on others - father, fate, bad traffic signals, whatever - but rather "seeks the error within himself, and through this introspection the external obstacle becomes for him an occasion for inner enrichment and education."

The first error within yourself is detailed in
39.3:
Going leads to obstruction;
Hence he comes back.

Your reckless behavior in the past caused your father to say things which squelched your inner child so throughly that rather than helping you to become more realistic he caused you to doubt yourself completely. It is time now for you to cease blaming your father like some pouty little kid and to re-evaluate what he said through the eyes of an adult. "Going leads to obstruction" suggests something he said was actually sensible even though at the time you didn't want to hear it. If you had gone on the way you were headed you would indeed have met with obstruction. Review now and see if you can spot any truth in your father's statements. Even if he actually said, "You'll never amount to anything," try to "come back" and review why you needed to hear such a thing. Perhaps there really was something you were doing that needed changing or perhaps now you can recognize it was his own unhappiness being projected on to you. The point is, quit telling yourself, "My father destroyed me." Instead say, "I was heading in directions where my father felt he could not guide or protect me. I will 'come back,' and reconnect with my family."
Recognizing now that you are not going to inherit the wrath of God should you forge ahead and actually become successful, the next step is outlined in

39.4:
Going leads to obstructions,
Coming leads to union.

Okay, this tells us there definitely are obstructions to you having the life you want, but the obstructions are not insurmountable. The solution involves joining with others. Perhaps your goals require having a degree or credential so the next step would be to join others in a class. Or maybe a support group of some sort or volunteering for a group cause you believe in.
Anyway, joining with others who are likewise working to improve their skills seems to be what's needed next.

45.
Gathering Together.
It furthers one to undertake something. The superior man renews his weapons.

Rather than worrying that you are with the "wrong" job or "wrong" people, be cautious but do join in with the folks around you. If they can't give you what you want or need perhaps you can give to them.
rosada

 

[cutiecat]

Steve, Gato, WF, Rosada - thank you for spending time and effort to help me out here. These are amazing thougts and ideas that you gave me. I need some time to process and I've re-reading your posts several days now trying to soak the wisdom on the website. Thanks again!