...life can be translucent

Menu

Work 35.4.6 to 2

Wildgeese

Supporter
Clarity Supporter
Joined
Apr 12, 2014
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
Hello dear online clarity community:
I have a series of readings that have me scratching my head a bit. I'd really love your feedback if you have a moment. My respect in advance.

This last two months have been extra-stressful for me at work. I'm a speech pathologist and of the 5 speech pathologists (SLPs) at my work, my job is to provide services to preschoolers in 13 different classrooms scattered over the rural county. I've been told that mine is the most stressful of the five positions. Still, mine is my second-preferred role of the options, there is only one other role I would prefer day to day and it is part time. With large student loans over my head I couldn't do that job now. While I think I'd do great as a private -sector speech pathologist, I need to stay in the public service sector for another 5-6 years to have my federal loans forgiven by my loan servicer.

It's a rural county and no other public SLP positions are available, except for one at a grade school that I think might prove to be more stressful than the one I'm at. I'm passionate about my work, and a very hard worker, often to my own detriment. I am a person that has to work to think of my own needs. That's something that I continue to make incremental progress with. I see how it can be damaging, and I don't wear it as a badge of pride to be self sacrificing. There's part of the background for my readings.

I asked: what is the nature of my job?

Hexagram 35.4.6<2

Sounds pretty accurate, sharing gifts and scurrying, scurrying about.

I foolishly wished this fall that if I wasn't caring for myself properly, would my body please place limitations on me, possibly a minor illness would jar me into taking my own needs for space, breaks, etc more into consideration. I've been sick a record number of times this year, 5 since September. I'm currently in bed, supposed to be working over the vacation to make up precious missed days, don't know if I'll be able to( Mine is also the only position of the 5 SLP jobs with no " substitute" should I miss services).

The fall was harder than usual due to an extra project I took on. Keep in mind that I work for a school district and there is no hope for "promotion," and very little concern for firing. Doing outstanding work is not expected and not necessarily rewarded, but as my boyfriend puts it, it seems to be fundamental to who I am. It's really hard for me to " dial it back." Usually I meet with parents about 1x/ week. This one week in January, I met with parents 8x during the week on top of other meetings and my usual visits with kids. A parent was intoxicated and was pretty aggressive during a meeting, right afterwards I had an interaction with a new SLP who is quite young and had very little on the job experience where I snipped at her and it turned into an unfriendly conversation. Once I wasn't mad, I felt pretty bad about it. Shes new, and younger than me, so the power balance was in my favor. Not that I really think she's an " innocent," but I'm in a position to help her and that means building a relationship where both of us feel safe. I immediately checked with her mentor saying I had communicated poorly, could he please check on her. I talked to three other trusted colleagues, the response was that I come across as very in control and strong at work ( it's true, but the other part of the truth is that I'm quite sensitive, something they've all learned from working with me through the years). I wrote the gal i'd snipped at a very apologetic card, which she seems to have accepted. My boss and I talked about this and I explained that I knew I'd caused this gal harm, that I want this gal to be successful at work, I'm truly rooting for her success, aside from whatever other feelings I have about her.

I asked, "what are my strengths at this time?" Yi have an answer that I at first interpreted very negatively, probably in part to how frustrated and heavy I feel at this time.

Hexagram 23.2.6<7

Looks like maybe this response was actually specific to work. I don't recall ever getting 23 in years of consulting, directly pertaining to my self. Maybe this is about how my identity with work is being stripped away? Maybe this becomes less of me and how I define myself? Maybe I can choose whether I get a " hut" or a " cart" in all this?

I asked " how did I behave with new gal?" Answer:

Hexagram 56.3.5.6<45

I skillessly attempted to communicate with her when I was having strong feelings, in the moment I (line 3) thought I was doing the right thing, only to realize later that lines 5&6 were outcomes-I was feeling mistrustful of her actions and consequently created a scar in a new relationship where we have no context or much shared experiences together. While I'm far from perfect, and have been snippy before, it's quite uncommon for me. I pride myself on being kind. I'm going to keep practicing keeping my mouth shut when I'm having strong feelings, but this way of acting was sadly really influenced by stress of my work demands. I feel like a whirling dervish! It makes me so mad! There's a lot of good stuff about my job, but stress from overwork makes just about every area of my life harder.

I asked " what will make things easier at work?"

Hexagram 23.1<27

Don't keep living in my idealistic world where everyone is served and everyone has plenty. I need to also look at how I continually nourish myself at work. I started getting sick when I stopped leaving work on time, taking walks, making time to meditate and cook veggies in the evening because I was just too tired. I need to really think closely about where the rubber meets the road and where I can pare it down to basic needs for myself ( and possibly my teachers, families, and children?) I'm being super hard on myself and I think some of this is just out of my control. How about just being with this really strange feeling of groundlessness (as is noted for this line in wikiwing)??

What will help me most right now?

Hexagram 23.6<2
Hope for new inspiration and beginning? That I won't feel this sick or down about work forever? New moments await?!

I asked "What can I do differently at work to feel good there this week? ( On my vacation, grrr)?

Hexagram 23.4<35

Split apart from my own sad story, think of other people that also have troubles at work? Think about what I have to give (35) even in a situation of stripping (23)?
Focus on a bigger picture, as LiSe implies for this line? Maybe even think about ways to communicate with my boss to make next year a little easier? Or, maybe, this feels right, maybe I need to focus on doing the least damage possible to myself at my job??

Finally I asked "what will benefit me most at work?"

Yi answered full circle and I decided it was time to stop asking questions. Right back to the beginning with

Hexagram 35.4.6<2

-which sounds an awful lot like the work I do, sharing the benefits of my specialized training with others, and supporting families, teachers, students. I'm in my car often and go to multiple centers in day. My boyfriend and a colleague who's been at work forever both say " I don't know how you do it", with all the work and relationship building ( I'm an introvert who only seems extroverted). Really, I don't see anything to be too proud of, being like a 5-skills squirrel. Similarly, putting my all (6) into my job seems to be causing me harm. So I'm still scratching my head that while 35 to 2 sounds like what I do, lines 4&6 sound like how I do it, and that doesn't sound positive or useful, yet it's what yi is pointing me back to.

What does anyone, please, make of any or all this? Your thoughts are greatly appreciated.
 

moss elk

visitor
Joined
Jul 22, 2013
Messages
2,320
Reaction score
96
Hi,

You've a lot of readings there and I'll just mention a couple of words that spring to mind about the firstlast reading.

35 Advance/Improvement
2 Help/Assist

So, you Help Improvement.
:)
 

Wildgeese

Supporter
Clarity Supporter
Joined
Apr 12, 2014
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
Help assist

Hi,

You've a lot of readings there and I'll just mention a couple of words that spring to mind about the firstlast reading.

35 Advance/Improvement
2 Help/Assist

So, you Help Improvement.
:)
Thanks Moss Elk, I like reading your posts. In the work I do with wee ones that's actually a very good match-- I don't " fix" or "teach" then do much as give them the skills to do things on their own. As little as they are, I'm still their "assistant."
 

Wildgeese

Supporter
Clarity Supporter
Joined
Apr 12, 2014
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
Hi online folks, I'm hoping to have one more set of eyes and feedback on all of the "sandwich" questions in this reading-- those start with 56 and quite a few for 23, a big run of lines. I really don't know if I have a good grasp of 23, unless it explains how crap I'm feeling about work.??? Thanks.
 

my_key

visitor
Joined
Mar 22, 1971
Messages
1,223
Reaction score
60
So many questions can bring about befuddlement. So to focus on one aspect, here's a bunch of words that might help you explore Hex 23.

Hex 23 - Stripping

Change what is outmoded. Step into the new and leave the old behind which is not always a painless thing - mentally, emotionally or physically. There is nothing you can do about the process of change that's going on right now - it's going to happen whether you like it or not.

As best you can give old habits, ways of thinking and behaviours up that are taking you to a low place and walk forward gladly into the new ways that present themselves to you. Self care is vital at this time so find the great in you that will help to nurture and nourish all those parts of you that are feeling below par or threatened by what is happening in and around you.

It'll all be for the greater good, so hold on and take the ride.

Good luck
 
Last edited:

legume

Supporter
Clarity Supporter
Joined
Jun 26, 2018
Messages
161
Reaction score
33
hello, thanks for taking us on this insightful journey through hex 23. here are my thoughts...

what are my strengths at this time? 23.2.6 > 7

i believe this has to do with the situation you described. line two might pertain to your initial reaction, as you asked about strength, Wilhelm suggests here that „the power of inferior people is growing” - maybe it illustrates that you reacted from the place of „lower feelings” or simply your ego, as that’s what was the strongest in you at the time. line 6 could be an illustration of your strength in splitting with that part of yourself and rising above it by rectifying the situation and apologising in time. hex 7 suggest then to keep the „inferior” part of yourself in check, maybe?

how did I behave with new gal? 56.3.5.6 > 45

i think your interpretation is quite clear, but i wonder if maybe I Ching is also trying to show that we’ve all been noobs once and the wanderer, as much as is referring to you in the situation, might be reflecting also her perspective? maybe the idea here is to remind you that even though you’re more experienced than her, you both are wanderers in this strange land, so the advice (in line 6) is not to keep too sure of yourself, maintain your natural modesty and authenticity. don’t know about keeping your mouth shut though, line 5 seems to me, again, that inbetween the other two lines, you did serve as a great example for her as well by quickly correcting your attitude regarding initial reaction? i’d also understand 45 here as an advice to let things pass, don’t brood over the feelings of insecurity that the work conflicts may stir up (gathering, massing) but rather make space within to let feelings flow freely as that would help gather your confidence and inner strength.

what will make things easier at work? 23.1 > 27

as you mention being overworked, tired and getting sick more often, i think the general advice here is to nourish yourself (by taking enough rest, the right kind of food, nourishing thoughts and everyday impressions - not only at work but also outside of it) to avoid the rise of „inferior people” again.
the 1st line of 23 coming up this time would mean to take better care of yourself and be more proactive rather than reactive - this would be how to avoid getting snippy and losing inner equilibrium (the bed, place of rest is being split at the legs)…

what will help me most right now? 23.6 > 2

trying to let go of your ego, splitting with your insecurities and allowing yourself to be more receptive. maybe let your boyfriend take care of you for a while? :) as your job is mostly to take care of others, i imagine you’re most of the time in control… the advice here could be then, to let go of the idea of control and allow yourself to accept (hex 2 can be also translated as accepting, receptive, receiving).

what can I do differently at work to feel good there this week? 23.4 > 35

not sure if i understand correctly, did you stay home this week as you’re sick? in this case, i think this is what line 4 is referring to, possibly the „misfortune” or lack of inner balance has reached its peak, finally got to you causing the illness… but maybe you needed this time off to take care of yourself, look within, ask I Ching all these questions so that when you’re back at work there will be progress (35) and you will automatically feel better.

what will benefit me most at work? 35.4.6 > 2

i believe the advice here might be against expecting to achieve too much at once (line 4 - progress like a hamster), but instead work steadily on your own attitude (line 6 - Making progress with the horns is permissible / Only for the purpose of punishing one's own city. / To be conscious of danger brings good fortune.) and again the idea of receptivity, acceptance and also giving some focus to receiving rather than that of constantly giving, is what i feel hex 2 is saying here…

hope you're feeling better by now and wish you all the best with finding some rest, nourishment and progress with your work!
 

Clarity,
Office 17622,
PO Box 6945,
London.
W1A 6US
United Kingdom

Phone/ Voicemail:
+44 (0)20 3287 3053 (UK)
+1 (561) 459-4758 (US).

Top