9.2.5 to 22

[jadefalls]

My question was Please help me understand why X does not want me.

Do I want him back, I don't know, but if I somehow did not act in the proper way, I want to know, so that I won't make the same mistake again.

So I am going to take a stab at it.
9 He did not feel I could be tamed? I was too aggressive?

line 2 Could it be that the woman he is with now was someone he was seeing before me and more in line with what he wanted, and so he returned to her?

line 5 Ya got me, I have no idea what this applies to.
22 I did not seem authentic to him, but she did?

This is embarrassing for me so please be gentle...

 

[long yi]

6 line layout

起卦时间：2012年07月17日14时17分
起卦农历：壬辰年五月廿九日未时

神煞：天乙—子申　福星—未　日禄—午　羊刃—巳　驿马—巳　桃花—子　华盖—未
干支：壬辰年　丁未月　己卯日　辛未时
旬空：午未　　寅卯　　申酉　　戌亥

六神　 伏神 　　　巽宫：风天小畜　　　　　　　　艮宫：山火贲（六合）
　　　　　　　　　【本　卦】　　　　　　　　　　　【变　卦】
勾陈　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟辛卯木　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟丙寅木　　
朱雀　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　子孙辛巳火　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　父母丙子水　　
青龙　　　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财辛未土　应　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财丙戌土　应
玄武　官鬼辛酉金　▅▅▅▅▅　妻财甲辰土　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　父母己亥水　　
白虎　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟甲寅木　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　妻财己丑土　　
滕蛇　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　父母甲子水　世　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟己卯木　世


Line 1 = you, line 4 = him
He still thinks of you. You think of a relationship that is only temporary.
Line 3 is another woman with a man hidden behind.
The man is with another female. You feel hopeless because the man sits empty under your house of spouse.

Line 2: the man moves towards another woman who is in conflict with your house of marriage and the woman in this man's mind.

Line 5: sounds like you are still interested in having a temporary relationship with him. The man is moving backwards in line 6.

Two female in hexagram 22: line 1 & 4 have a connection (man and her, probably may not be you). Line 2 and 5 have a yin-yin connection. That connections is not real (a female and a short term relationship).

There is another female (line 3 of hexagram 9). He does not think that you are serious... just a fling. You may be the one that push him towards the other female (just a guess).

 

[jadefalls]

QUOTE=long yi;162381]6 line layout

起卦时间：2012年07月17日14时17分
起卦农历：壬辰年五月廿九日未时

神煞：天乙—子申　福星—未　日禄—午　羊刃—巳　驿马—巳　桃花—子　华盖—未
干支：壬辰年　丁未月　己卯日　辛未时
旬空：午未　　寅卯　　申酉　　戌亥

六神　 伏神 　　　巽宫：风天小畜　　　　　　　　艮宫：山火贲（六合）
　　　　　　　　　【本　卦】　　　　　　　　　　　【变　卦】
勾陈　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟辛卯木　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟丙寅木　　
朱雀　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　子孙辛巳火　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　父母丙子水　　
青龙　　　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财辛未土　应　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财丙戌土　应
玄武　官鬼辛酉金　▅▅▅▅▅　妻财甲辰土　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　父母己亥水　　
白虎　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟甲寅木　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　妻财己丑土　　
滕蛇　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　父母甲子水　世　　　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟己卯木　世


Line 1 = you, line 4 = him
He still thinks of you. You think of a relationship that is only temporary.
Line 3 is another woman with a man hidden behind.
The man is with another female. You feel hopeless because the man sits empty under your house of spouse.

Line 2: the man moves towards another woman who is in conflict with your house of marriage and the woman in this man's mind.

Line 5: sounds like you are still interested in having a temporary relationship with him. The man is moving backwards in line 6.
a guess).[/QUOTE]

No disrespect intended long yi but Why do you think I am only interested in a temporary relationship, if I am having all these marriage and spouse lines? Personally I can say that If I get into a relationship I want it to be permanent, I don't take these things lightly. There were so many factors that made it difficult. Where he lives, and his neighbors. He always seemed to be in trouble. I did not feel he could be serious. It reflected in our interactions. I was nervous, I had doubts. I want to believe he is a good man, and would eventually grow up. My God he is 50 years old, and he was acting like he was in his 20's and immature 20 at that. What surprised me was the woman that he is with, she is a lot older, and I am wondering if there is even a romantic involvement there. I have been getting readings suggesting that I am not seeing things as they are, that he is not my enemy.

 

[pocossin]

Please help me understand why X does not want me.
9.2.5 > 22

Xun over Qian (the breath of heaven: ancestral influence) to Beauty. You don't remind him enough of his mother.

 

[jadefalls]

Please help me understand why X does not want me.
9.2.5 > 22

Xun over Qian (the breath of heaven: ancestral influence) to Beauty. You don't remind him enough of his mother.

Oh my...I think you nailed it. His mother passed away, but I have seen photos of her. She was a playboy bunny, when she was younger. This woman did look like her, the older version, not the playboy bunny. I even commented about that to my friend. I said if I did not know better, I would think that is his Mother.
If that is the reason, then I will never see him again... I look nothing like his mother, and I probably do not act like most mothers from that time. I do remember him saying that I do not act like a Sagittarius, because I filed a grievance at work. I have had to work and provide for my 2 daughters. I may never find a man who is strong enough, and secure enough to have a relationship with.

 

[long yi]

I only analyzed based on the theory.

父母丙子水 (marriage papers) line 5 is 桃花 romance encounter. In Chinese, this comes with the explanation that a romance encounter is not long lasting. That line refers to your interaction with this man only, and not any other man because you inquire only about him. Of course, the marriage document line refers to marriage, but if 桃花 romance encounter is associated with it. Encounter is then restricted to a time period. At least one party involved may not be interested in evolving it into a permanent marriage spousal relationship.

Do not mean to offend anyone. I read by the theory. It cannot be always accurate. You are the best judge when you re-read all aspects of the hexagram.

There is a catch to hexagram 22. Grace is hollow, and lack substance. Things look good on the outside. Is it really good in the long term? According to Ma's Iching theory, it cannot lead to a long term stable relationship. According to Rosemary Barr, don't be misled by outward appearances. This relationship may be fun, but it probably lacks the vital ingredients for long term commitment.

My conclusion is in line with theory above.

 

[jadefalls]

I see, it's not that I want a temporary relationship, it's that the relationship that I wanted is temporary, no matter what I do.

The question is, Why? Am I the hollow grace? Do I lack substance? That is what I wanted to know. Your answer seems to indicate that I am without grace and substance.

 

[long yi]

The meaning of Hexagram 22:

Quote
Your relationship with Friend is based on beauty you perceive in each other. There is a kind of intermediary between you, an aesthetic ether, that transforms what each of you are to yourselves into a symbol meaningful to the other. You worship Friend's physical form or enjoy the form of Friend's communication with you (as opposed to its content) or you delight in the form of your sexual congress or you thrill to the form of the tension between you; you don't worship, enjoy, delight in, or thrill to Friend. If this aesthetic appreciation is mutual and if the relationship remains on that plane, you will be a beautiful and tranquil couple. If the aesthetic appreciation is one-sided, then each of you will feel wronged and misunderstood.
Unquote

Teaching here:
1. Important matters require other approaches and deeper considerations.
2. Some individuals may display characteristics which will hide their internal merits.
3. Most will have a clear insight because the trigram Li is in the lower position.
4. Quiet and firm is the key to the situation.
5. There is a possbility that you may be cheated, tricked or slandered.

Hollow does not mean that you lack substance, but it suggests that you are distracted by the ornaments on the person giving grace than the actual person's true intent or character.

You have been seeing things the wrong way, trying to place blame on yourself or sometimes others in this whole picture.

If you take a few steps backwards and rethink logically, you will get a clear image of the big picture.

Are you the one with the ornament or is that him? Are you attracted by what he got and what he offer, instead of who he really is. Or both of you have ornaments, masking the true self. Then everything is hollow, not you or him, but the overall picture.

No one know that answer except you. Sit still and think, solve the puzzle yourself. Do not place blame on anyone, including yourself.

Too many change lines mean the situation is unstable and you do not know what to do because you do not stop a moment to sort things out in your mind. You consult the Oracle. I Ching tells you to look within: your head or your heart. Relationship is a balance of affordability and desirability.

 

[jadefalls]

I asked What will happen if I take long yi advice? 17.5 to 51 Good

I asked what will happen if I ignore long yi advice? 22.1.2 to 18 Bad