Checking in about my qi gong practice with nature. Hexagram 12 lines 5 and 6 potentialy changing

[Daeluin]

Nine years ago I attended some classes with a different teacher. One of the teachings related to taking energy from nature that didn't belong to us, for those who do qi gong and martial arts. It was described in terms of stealing, and that it would make the spirits of nature mad among other things.

Certainly, I know that there have been large numbers of people in groups doing qi gong that took energy from trees in China, and those trees died.

Certainly, I also know that forms of sending bad energy out of the body and off somewhere into the distance, can also have negative affects. Damo Mitchel wrote that his mother's dog died when he was careless with some specific dao yin exercises, and he gives these exercises the description of "purging stagnant qi from the body".

However the way I have been taught to do qigong does not as far as I know try to steal energy, and the only form of dao yin we do is a gentle cleansing that presses any stagnant energy down deep into the earth to be burned away. I don't feel this cleansing is all that powerful, at least not the way I do it. Mostly the way I work is by rooting to heaven and earth and allowing the yin and the yang to merge within me.

This energy seems to come from heaven and earth, though what sources exactly I don't know. The third eye may be related to some extent as well.

When I am unrefined, I can do qigong and notice the winds stirring far away. And as I gradually become more refined, the energy is subtle and pure and the winds to not stir.

Clearly I am aware that my field is affecting a large area, but I have the sense that this affect is more one of harmonizing with many spiraling movements that lead to refinement within and without. As I work to refine the energy, I feel I am also extending far from me to harmonize and refine whatever is reached in whatever way it needs. Even when I am unrefined after days of not practicing (as I was before I resumed my daily work a few weeks ago), I sense that the more abrupt changes my energy facilitates are sent to reach the places where they can have the appropriate change within the city I cultivate in.

I do cultivate next to a big oak tree every morning now, and yet I feel that we are in relationship with each other. At least this is my intent, and I thank the tree and offer it my blessings and hugs and compassion. When I first began working in this spot, I sent my feelings out to see if it was OK for me to work here like this, and I continue to set the intention to check in and hope there is some sign if I am not welcome to do this work here, or if the tree is disappointed about it in some way.

But the more refined my energy becomes, the more I feel that I cannot do but help with this sort of work. As they say, giving and receiving are one.

So this is just to spell all that out and then check in and see what sort of nuances I am navigating here, if there are any red flags on this path like those I have been warned of, if I am avoiding them, etc, whatever is most appropriate for me to navigate with.

888799

Interesting - makes a lot of sense. Thank you.

Hexagram 12, Obstruction, Lines 5 and 6 active.

Hexagram 12's first 3 yin line's represent compounding conditioning:

• The first line's conditioning is like weeds, where they may be pulled out by the roots so easily that other weeds are pulled up too.
• The second line's conditioning represents the stage where something is rotting on the inside, but still appears sound on the outside. In the case of fermentation, we can make alcohol. Alcohol is a poison, but many of us like it for how it makes us feel inside. With this sort of energy, it may be false, but we do not care if we are people without integrity. For the person walking the higher path however this energy prevents reaching the true, just like one who is inebriated cannot think as clearly as they might think they do.
• The third line's conditioning represents the culmination that becomes the clog, the blockage, or obstruction. The compulsory behaviors, the addictions, the corruption through and through.
  
  A good analogy is hair in the drain. At first it is easy to deal with. After time one may notice that the water drains more slowly, but there is still drainage, so here the lazy person might allow it, while the integral person might face it now before it becomes worse. For if left, it becomes a clog that might be hard to deal with, and nasty too!

The last three lines represent the sorting out of the blockage, the cleansing of conditioning:

• When yin culminates, yang is born. Line 4 appears next to the culminated yin in line 3, and associates with the first yin in line 1 as well. So it can see the problem, and the solution, however it cannot rely on either line 1 or line 3 for accomplishing the work. It is also next to the ruler, line 5, and so if it is able to gain the favor / mandate of line 5, then all of the yangs can work together to resolve the obstruction. Alas, given the momentum of conditioning, this line may not always have a voice strong enough to be heard.
• Line 5 is the ruler of the hexagram, and from its position between the two other yangs, can rest in the center and work with them to facilitate many solutions. However it also associates with line 2 and its unpredictability. So it needs to create contingency plans to ensure that even if conditioning does lead to corruption, that it may still be addressed and resolved without obstruction.
• Line 6 associates with line 3's corruption, but from a distance. It has direct and clear access to line 5, and benefits from line the previous work of line's 4 and 5, thus it has the leverage to overturn the corruption completely. Notably overturning hexagram 12 results in hexagram 11, tranquility. This is a dynamic in a few hexagrams, like 43-44.

For my reading, this is interesting, as both lines relate to a process of correction and refining that lead to the complete end of any issues. Just like the principle where giving and receiving are one, here my internal obstruction and the external obstructions found within nature may be resolved simultaneously. However, with line 5 there is still the need to have discipline to ensure the work is carried out in operation that is correct and not false. And with line 6, when the work gets to that point, there is no issue, as inside and outside are one.

---

Now to muse on what is changing, and what is advised to change or not change.

The Forest of Changes, in my experience so far, helps reveal what is changing, making it clear when this contradicts from the advice of the yijing's line statements.

However, this particular hexagram is not at all straight forward, and the Forest reflects this.

I'll take Lars Bo Christensen's translation with notes for fielding this as I think it best captures the nuances the Forest is speaking to. It is also more true to the original ZhouYi, but also more readable than the likes of Field/Rutt.

Perhaps the best perspective on what is changing here can be summed up in the hexagram statement "The Great depart, the small come." The great here are not the ones who go along with these changes, but withdraw from these changes. The small who go along with these changes end up in unfortunate circumstances, for the most part.

Christensen: Refrain from this. There is no one that does not want gain, but the wise person act correctly when he lets great things go away and settles with the smaller.

For changed line 1, hexagram 12 changes to 25:

Yin reaches its apogee and fades,
Yang's virtuous power is established.
Treading on fire and bearing the light,
All are illuminated.
But the merit cannot last,
A toad replaces the king on the throne.

Christensen: When pulling out grass roots make the whole network of roots [come out]. If you correct this good [then crops can grow [with success].

This can get tricky, but it is logical. The yin is represented by the grass roots. They are what is representing conditioning here. Removing them, withdraws their change. Not removing them allows them to usurp the crops. This is what the poem is talking about - allowing yin to change to yang and allowing the grass roots' power to become established, spreading rapidly, seen by all - and yet despite the glory of their growth, when they rise above the surface they still manifest as grass stalks and not the desired crops.

So the line statement here is speaking about how to withdraw the yin.

For changed line 2, hexagram 12 changes to 6:

Gui, Bi, Cong, Zhang,
Precious objects used for audiences with the king.
Bai Li Xi and Ning Qi,
Employed by Qi and Qin.

Christensen: To shelter and support small people is good. [However,] by refraining from doing so the great man [actually] makes things go well.

Bai Li Xi and Ning Qi are ministers known for coming from poverty and rising to prominent positions.
And the precious objects used for audiences with the king... what are they in relation to true and false?

I think "Employed" here is a key word, suggesting that what is great here are Bai Li Xi and Ning Qi. Bai Li Xi's wikipedia page describes someone not often recognized for his talent, and indeed imprisoned, until his skills were put in use to put in power one who became known as one of the Five Great Hegemons of the Spring and Autumn period.

In light of this, what is false stands out as the jade objects used by the kings and their desire for power. If these poor but 'great men' did not support these rulers, perhaps things would have turned out better. Rulers that only have the ability to amass great power with the aid of great men need not be more than overly ambitious small people. It is wisdom and sagacity that makes greatness in this canon.

Again, the line statement is advising to not go with the change.


For changed line 3, hexagram 12 changes to 33:

Losing the confidence of family and friends,
Spouse gone out the door,
Hesitant as a rabbit,
Dejected as an old cur.

Christensen: Conceal what is shameful.

Simpler. The line statement is advising to not to with the change. And the Forest reveals the consequences of going with the change.


For changed line 4, hexagram 12 changes to 20:

A niche in the southwest corner,
There Yao and Shun dwell.
Preserving lives,
Safeguarding the nation.

Christensen: If you have an assignment leaving your farmland is not a mistake but in fact, a blessing.

Here, we seem to get our first approval to go along with change. Other translations note "A pair of lia-birds." Field notes that this is a sign foretelling the rise to the throne of a new emperor.

But remember, here our change can be ineffective if it does not have the mandate / assignment. As we can see later on, the mandate may refer none other than to the mandate of heaven, and thus taking up the mantle of the emperor or at least winning his approval. They need to leave the farmland to go to the leader (line 5) and be heard, or to take his place successfully. So it is wise to withdraw (perhaps?) if there is no way to move forward, but wise to expend the energy if there is a chance of success.

For changed line 5, hexagram 12 changes to 35:

Two ducks flying together,
Returning to the rice paddy to seek food.
Wounded by arrows as they pass through the reeds,
The sigh of it harrows the heart.

Here I'll break from Christensen and go with Field. He describes how the last Shang King was so bad that after his death the people proclaimed "No More! No More!" and this is why we create our contingency plan.

Our pair of birds likely represents those from line 4 (people translate them as lots of different types of birds I notice), rejected and then shot - they didn't receive the mandate/assignment and weren't able to change. Thus this line's change is not positive and not advised without line 4's change. Line 5 representing a leader, is best served by a yang line. This line should not use up his energy fully and change to yin, but use his energy flexibly to preserve the position. This line's change is what is represented by the lure of the association to line 2, and this is why the contingency plan is important - to keep it from changing, and in this way there can be 'cessation from wrongdoing' and 'good fortune for the great one.'


For changed line 6, hexagram 12 changes to 45:

The square baskets are broken,
The round baskets worn through,
They lie abandoned in the road.
Crushed and collapsed, pierced and ruined,
Never again to hold treasures.

This is the line of overturning the obstruction. It seems to need its yang leverage and not to use up its strength, in order to accomplish the task. Otherwise the corruption goes on until the state of the kingdom deteriorates. The bit about first obstruction, and then happiness, suggests that there is a process here at work. We aren't given a lot to go on about the operation. However later on we can see that withdrawing this line's change might indicate what is good for the great man. Or perhaps changing this line, might also indicate a personal overturning, but one that does not address the blockage in the world. And that this line's true overturning needs to accomplish more change than just its own.

What is interesting here is the readings for if any combination of the 3 yangs change.

If lines 4 and 5 change, we have ripening fruit growing more delicious.
If lines 5 and 6 change, we have the true man appear
But if lines 4 and 6 change, we have 12-8:

Officials and nobles guard one another,
Protecting one another to remain without blame.
Chasing the hare and not catching it,
The elder is sad and troubled.

Chasing the hare here represents seeking the throne. Officials and nobles are represented by lines 4 and 6, protecting each other even though the king remains in power. This suggests that the king's corruption is able to be in force even if it doesn't fully capitulate.


So perhaps the 5th line changing from yang to yin represents two things. Changing by itself represents the strength of the leadership caving to corrupt practices in association with line 2, but perhaps more strongly than usual, going fully into 'ruin'. However, Changing with line 4 represents the likes of Shao and Yun (sage kings) liberating the corruption and replacing the king on his seat, thus being the other reason that yang is removed. And the reason for the ripening fruit growing more delicious.

With lines 5 and 6 changing to 16:

The precipitous heights of the mountain's southern peak,
This is where the true man dwells.
Though ones virtuous power is that of a Yao or Shun,
It is following heaven's mandate that makes a son of heaven.
The libation receives the blessing,
But it is the person himself whom the people favor.

Notably here the true man (zhen ren, a daoist immortal) is not on the throne, but on the mountain peak. Though they have the power of a sage-king, it is following heaven's mandate that fulfills their role. It is their offering that receives the blessing of heaven, though the people favor the person not their conduct, because much of it is likely invisible to them.

Perhaps in this case line 6's change influences line 5's change in the sense that its actions are able to neutralize line 5's power without usurping the throne like line 4 does. However note the importance of this influence - one cannot just go cultivate on a mountain, that only changes line six. The cultivation has to be far reaching enough to accomplish the mandate of heaven in order to change line five and overturn the obstruction. First obstruction, then happiness.

In any case, it seems safe for these two lines to change together like this, and the result is 'broadcasting', which is notable because there is an energy rippling outward that is carrying something positive with it. Perhaps that is part of the meaning of the reading, or part of the highest potential of the change that could be here.

---

Processing this line's changes has been a lot of fun. This line represents virgo, and the 6th house where we regulate ease and dis-ease: our health. It can be perhaps understood how navigating these sorts of affairs is a comlicated and compartmentalized undertaking. It is only in a multi-faceted process that we are able to put things in their correct places and re-assert balance following obstruction.

 

[Daeluin]

It turns out I am getting some validation on how this works as well.

I've been waking up earlier and earlier the past two weeks to do my cultivation work across the street. And the work has become more and more refined.

And now I am flowing into a synchronicity that involves others around me. Like I said, the work extends far and wide, as we allow it to and have the capacity for.

So yesterday morning, after cultivation I shower and drive to work. I walk the 3 blocks to my building, and right as I am about to cross the street in front of it, there is a voice that calls my name. Oh look, it's an old friend from my cultivation class who I later shared massage school with. We exchange cordial greetings and move on. She reflects that I appear to be glowing, and I say the same to her.

Then, I leave work, pause on a stool to respond to a text while listening to an incredible busker that started setting up in this spot after the restaurant I love moved from two blocks down to right underneath where I work. And that done, I cross the street and walk back toward my car.

Then I hear my name again. This time it is another old friend I haven't seen in over 18 months, and when I did I forgot a scarf there that has sentimental meaning to me. We exchange greetings and then she walks me back to my car to get it. This is a friend who lives over an hour drive away and makes fairly infrequent trips to town. Quite a lovely surprise! All just unfolding along my path.

This morning, I did my cultivation work, and then am walking back to my house, and a man pushing a baby carriage out for a walk comments on my bare feet, wondering something about people who walk barefoot all the time and callouses. I frankly explain I do not know, as I do not walk barefoot all that often. He then takes a moment to own his projection, and we cordially exchange chit chat for a little bit, discover resonance with what the cities around the country are becoming, and I simply explain my path to him.

Rather than trying to make sense of right or wrong, I try to just show up and do my work. When I do my work, the synchronistic unfoldings around me show if I am on my path or not. As long at it seems like I am on my path, then I don't need to worry as much about right and wrong, as the timing of things is unfolding the way it needs to.

He seems to consider this, and then asks me how I would design a city that works better. I mention something about needing to figure out the issue of roads. And we talk about houses integrating with nature better. He has some specific ideas and I say that there are lots of creative things people are already doing all over the place to integrate, we just need to follow the principle of integrating more with nature, and we will find our way from there.

Then his little one start fussing and he jogs back home.

Again, not doing anything except what shows up on my path, but also allowing my path to flow organically. And even though I am just working on my own inner work, I cannot help but be aware that I am also doing a great deal of invisible outer work. For as the saying goes, when one part moves, all parts move. Perhaps this is how the mandate of heaven may be accomplished, even without rulers.

And if many people walk a path like this, how can corruption remain in this realm? And none of it requires fighting corruption. This also resonates with hexagram 13, as well as the idea of apoptosis and how it is induced by exposure to powerful innocence.

Next, needed to get back to my friend about potentially hanging out today. She suggested a park last night. Today I felt like driving up to a mountain top and reading, since I have a book that is part of a different part of my healing I need to be digesting. I also remembered that she has two copies of Zhuangzi. One that I let her borrow, which she then thought was lost and ordered a second and then found again. She said she intended to give one back to me, but it has been a while. So I suggested she can bring both copies and I'll bring the pie I have left over from a potluck last night for us to share.

I left the timing up to her - and it turns out she has an appointment, so we'll go after that. But I've been getting this feeling that there is something awaiting me up there. Who knows, we shall see!

 

[Daeluin]

Today at 12:14 AM
As foreseen, the trip into the mountains was indeed eventful.

I have been helping my friend with healing work that involves massage and spiritual guidance, staying in my scope of practice carefully, as they navigates a issues in their body related to a difficult relationship that is challenging their ability to make choices for themself. This is a classic manifestation of stagnation in the Gall Bladder meridian.

I was only part of my friend's healing work, and they did eventually get surgery. Our friendship unfolded more after massage stopped due to surgery and we started hanging out more.

That was 4 weeks ago. The recovery has been going well, however there is still some pain. We were both aware that there would still be emotional work needed after the surgery.

I previously questioned the yi in regards to ensuring I was not falsely enabling this person and taking away from their potential healing, and received a positive omen that the support of someone's aid was needed and beneficial. So I simply do my best to support and join them where they are at on their journey, and I try to not tell them what they need to do. It is more powerful for them to connect it all on their own. And if I do over-speak, they do not understand. So this is the way.

However, I once read something about an astrological configuation I carry, that said I worked like a shaman, wearing a headdress and charging at someone with a spear, to scare the evil spirits out of them. That really hasn't ever been me, although I do like working creatively from many perspectives, using what comes.

---

So Yesterday, I get prepared to journey into the mountains. I add some oil to my car. Bring pie. A hat. A book.

And go off to pick up my friend.

The route I travel to hops off the interstate and traverses a windy road from beginning to end.

Along the beginning, I mention how the winding of this road is very much like the long and winding Gall Bladder meridian. Because of how it twists and turns, representing our ability to twist and turn upon our paths as they change, and change, and change. A linear mindset does not serve.

It is quite beautiful. Up somewhere near the top of the ridge, a field opens up and we see a big black bear in the field.

I pull over so we can look and get a picture. It is far off, to my eyes. I get out and get a picture.

Then several things happen that create compounding fear and anxiety in my friend.

The hood is steaming, so the radiator is boiling over. There is a bear in the field. The car is really hot. My friend gets out and steps in a little poison ivy.

All at once, my friend is stuck with nowhere to turn, unsure what to do. Afraid of the car exploding, afraid the bear, which they feels is rather close. Heating up and having trouble making clear headed decisions.

Meanwhile I am very calm. Unperturbed. Equanimous.

I explain that there isn't much we can do here about the car, but this has happened before and I know what to do. We just need to get somewhere good to pull over, let the water stop boiling, then add some more water to top the radiator off. That is all.

But my friend is now escalating quickly. We do get back in the car and travel about half a mile further on, where there is a well known local overlook spot that tourists don't know about.

The road there is covered in graffiti, as are the rock outcroppings. But it is good energy. The inner dark soul of teenagers growing up in a healthy town. Much more thoughtful emblems than most graffiti, meanings not slangs, and so on.

There are rocks overlooking a vast valley, with another ridgeline on the opposite side, a mile away, covered in dark storm clouds.

There is rain over there, coming down as we gingerly make our way through more poison ivy to stand and watch. My friend asked for some time to process, and I give it to them.

Another person is present on some rocks out of our sight, but we can hear their music playing. I do some qi gong and watch the rain pouring down far away on the other side of the distant ridgeline. Then another song comes on and it has a nice beat to it, and I dance a little.

I hear my friend laughing.

We reconnect, and my friend reveals all the dots that had just connected for them. Somehow the song had some special memories related to their relationship, and connecting that lead to cascading epiphany.

So now my friend relaxes a little more, but this road is still part of some sort of Shamanic journey we are both on together.

The distant storm has aroused fear again, since we don't have a way out right away and need to wait for the car to cool down before I can add more water to the radiator.

There is shelter in the car, but not for someone who doesn't feel safe around a car that had recently been steaming. The storm won't blow over that distant mountain ridge, but someone not used to the mountains won't understand this. My words are inadequate.

So I take care of myself and get comfortable. I lay out a mat for us both to sit on, anchor it with rocks. I'm as calm and cozy as can be, loving our front row seats for the epic downpour that is now unfolding a mile away. The rain falling just looks solid gray now, the same as the clouds. They're getting some amazing rain over there.

I pull out the pie and offer it to my friend, who, without other options, finally begins to operate with change again, beginning to become unstuck.

We eat and watch and then I get up to check on the car. As predicted, just needed some water. What is left in the trunk and my water bottle is the exact perfect amount to fill it up.

I return and let my friend know the car is fine and ready.

We linger a bit to admire the graffiti, then get back in the car and I let them know, several times at this point, that I am happy to take them where-ever they feel comfortable.

They want to proceed on with our journey.

So we do, taking the GB road further and further, until it goes up into a cloud.

Now my friend becomes nervous again, of the unknown.

I explain how much I love being in clouds, and how long it has been since I've had this opportunity. It makes everything more mystical.

It isn't much further. The cloud isn't all that thick either, good visibility on the road, just a new experience for my friend.

We park at the trail head and now there are steps. Nice solid stone steps, for about half a mile up.

More good GB work, for both of us. Steps and choices, twists and turns. But solid footing.

The medicinal plants around us are vibrant healthy. There is no poison ivy in these woods. They are opening energetically to absorb the mist as their nourishment. We feel in awe.

The mist of the cloud feels lovely and cool, a nice transition from the journey's previously overbearing heat.

Before long we arrive at the overlook spot, where no view can be seen, but we have it all to ourselves - to be shared with the beautiful endangered micro-biome existing all around us.

We sit down and relax and get comfortable. My friend draws, I read. We talk. We meet some people. We relax.

It finally rains. Big sporadic drops. Not enough to get us wet.

At this point, what can we do? My friend seems calm.

And then the rain goes away, barely ten drops having touched my person.

We talk, and my friend opens up about things I've never heard them mention before. There is a depth and a realness that is more authentic and less posturing. We talk about relationships and troubles.

The winds begin to blow and it gets chilly and we leave.

All along the drive home (no more problems from my car), my friend opens up more in a way that feels like some good work is being done in processing latent emotions.

And that's that. I drop them off and we'll see what unfolds next time.

So no intentions other than to read a book on a mountain top.... neither of us was prepared for what the journey had in store. But it was powerful, likely more than I can know.

Perhaps I'll get that radiator fixed now. And I wonder what would have happened had it not been a problem yesterday, of all day. It is a fairly rare occurrence. In the end, some things happen the way they need to.

I read a little more in my book and went to bed.

---

I woke up early, replied to someone on reddit, and did more qi gong by my tree across the street.

It is hard. According to the Cantong Qi, the monthly cycle of hexagrams for yesterday was Waiting during the day, then Contention at night. A bunch of yang not flowing together well. Fading into the Army as the sun rose.

It is hard. There is stiffness in my spine I haven't felt in two weeks, and an emptiness to the energy, but a heaviness within it. Perhaps this is the lead found within water, and now the water, of the water under earth hexagram is active.

I do my work and eventually my energy clears and lightens and I feel I have worked through something that previously might have led me to give up.

Now I'm making progress again, and I can feel the magnitude of my field.

A couple hours in, a circle forms on the other side of the grassy field. Mothers and their children, gathering to connect and play some interactive games together. I recalled that last week I showed up later in the day, right as they were leaving. Last time they had been in the spot I am in, by the big tree, and now they are across the field in another shady spot.

I'm getting really into my work at this point, and some good energy is moving around. I feel called to continue working here as long as they are here, so I move on into some forms I haven't tried in a while, and make some very unexpected progress with them. The energy moving through me makes it much clearer how to work with these movements now.

Then I meditate and empty out, and then step into some circle walking qi gong that empties and refines, and I can feel the sweeping motions of my fingers and arms cleansing and refining the qi delicately, invisibly, in a vast radius around me as I circle. Maybe half a mile away. I notice their circle is almost finished dissipating happily right as I finish my work.

And then I wander home.

---

Who can say, what change was influenced here today. Certainly not my ego.

And yet I can see in all of this more evidence of how the operation is able to unfold.

---

In a few hours I will go to work and give a massage.

I work on the same block that also houses the classroom where I learned my qi gong.

And during the time I am giving my massage, my teacher will be hosting a lecture on using weapons in internal martial arts.

I do not normally work on Thursdays, and it is even rarer to only cover a partial shift for a coworker. Let alone one that means I can't attend the lecture that I otherwise might have gone to. I have not yet rejoined the school again, but this lecture was opened to the public. So my dao had already arranged for me to be unable to attend, well before I even knew about the plans for the lecture.

As my previous reading revealed, when I asked about the lecture, I will not be doing weapon work any longer, internal or otherwise.

I shared this reading with my teacher via text, so they could understand my decision, and linked them to that thread. Very unusually, I received no reply. But I felt them present during the reading. And especially after the text, when a strong wave of yang qi washed over my head as I meditated in stillness.

That day, just so happened to be the day I had a long time massage client return from spending 6 months in Europe, where they were unable to get a good massage.

They had booked a 2.5 hour session with me, and after my teachers energy washed over me I was in a deeply spiritual place.

This allowed me to finally put into practice the teaching I had bee taught. To not use my own energy in the massage work, but to simply allow what came through the top of my head down through my arms into the person. Only allow what they were able to draw in.

Given my refining of late, that massage also taught me that I can't use too much pressure otherwise I can't avoid giving my own energy, even if I just keep things physical. So I had the opportunity to work slowly and carefully, and during this work the top of my head opened and opened, for even if they weren't able to receive, I was connected.

I learned so much from that massage. And the person I was working on was very much on their path and able to receive. It was all very aligned. Afterward they were so much more out of it than I had ever seen them before, and I sat them on the couch and we conversed and went over the experience together, until I was sure they were safe to drive and so on. They probably weren't feeling it quite like I was, and they absolutely loved it.

Then they rebooked for 4 more 2 hour sessions during the month they are back in town, before they go home to their birth town to pick up and finish part of their work that they realized remains there for them. It felt so good to work with and empower someone who is so tuned into their path and what needs to be done.

So whatever is happening with my teacher and I, seems fairly mysterious to me. I let them know I will be nearby in spirit, though I cannot attend. But I don't yet know what that means, and doubt I will be sensitive enough to notice any thing from half a block away. I'll just be focused on my massage and working through the top of my head, and nothing else.

Intro to methodologies I work with.
Navigating the Forest of Changes
How I cast the yarrow stalks.

 

[Daeluin]

I'll try to be more brief. (Hah!)

I am noticing that I am finally pick up on the Cantong Qi's 60 hexagram recipe for the moon cycle, and this did start with the beginning of that cycle. So perhaps I will continue to explore, if that is acceptable. It is a ... different type of shared reading in that.

Yesterday's Army continued on fairly uneventful and empty, according with the yin.

As I discovered in my recent reading, the upper lines of the Army require a fair amount of restraint.

I had some anxiety when leaving, as my housemate proferred an exit agreement that did not account for the final day I might need in leaving, so I requested that modification... right as he came home. He didn't seem to check his phone right away, so I felt uncertain at first and then drawn to leave for work a few minutes early, in 'retreat' if you will.

Walking up the couple of blocks from my parking spot to work, an interesting synchronicity unfolds before my eyes. A thumb sized black spider scurries out from the grass into the sidewalk, and at almost at the exact same moment a bird laying in wait swoops down to get it, but now I'm there, and it quickly updates the flight plans. The spider pauses for a split second to take what happened and scurries back into the grass. I don't think it was me it was taking respite from.

I realized too now why my teacher didn't reply. The reply was always just two emojis. for stillness and to return things to the dao. I included them at the end of my reply already. What reply is needed? And I'm doing the work.

For me, the work continues with my massage. My cultivation has become more refined, and I no longer have the energy from my teacher to pull through. That was a synchronous gift for my previous client. And as the new moon has passed, the emptiness is filling up with more substance. I can still tap in, but it is more subtle.

And this client, in their own words, 'needs a lot of clearing'. Which I don't do.

So as I try to pull through from the top of my head into my hands, I can't get much. If I use more pressure I can, but at that point I realize it is vibration coming out of their tissues and pushing up my arms into my head. So I start to be able to determine the balance between the two sides, and understand how I can only use more pressure if it is going in the other direction, into the person and not out of them.

But even then, there are some movements that seem to draw it in. Like some polarity therapy I did at the end, that opened the joints and then it came through. I could tell my client wanted it. Wanted the qi, was sensitive to it. But despite the huge diamond earrings, they seemed to think they could pay for the clearing of their qi and not do their own energy work. Still very satisfied at the end.

And essentially more work retreating. This massage was very much hexagram 7 line 5. Tapping into the communion between the general of line two (the energy at the top of my head) and the work that needs to be done only in coordination with that general, and not allowed to take its own liberties.

---

I slept an hour after sunset, after a 5m meditation. Relaxing, calm. Woke after some pleasant dreams, just before sunrise. Felt very much like a harmonious night.

See a thread about salt being good for the kidneys on r/chinesemedicine. Pull out the Su Wen and share from several chapters explaining that this is not the case, and what is actually going on here. How salt sedates the kidneys and releases their essence, but to help them consolidate essence bitter is used, and to prevent them from drying pungent flavors are used to circulate fluids back to them.

We are already into line one of hexagram 9, nurturance by the small, which begins with Returning to the path -- how could that be blameworthy?

As a whole, nurturance of the small is about "making the small one's nourishment".

And so, in my qi gong, I find that - perhaps because of all the yin from yesterday, largely inactive and closed - today there isn't much qi. But I do happily realize that my work is really paying off. As my spiraling and silk reeling unfold, I realize that muscles are becoming more supple and the tension from 18 months of physical massage work is becoming transformed. As I work I still have trouble accessing the top of my head (until later in standing meditation), but there is definitely still qi, just very refined and subtle.

The routine becomes about using the exercises to lean into where the tension remains, in my deltoids, behind my scapula, my pecs. My quads are getting slowly more limber from daily stretching and breathing through them, and I feel more connected with the ground.

Now I begin my taijiquan forms - as children come from the community center to play dodgeball, and I get distracted and kick a couple stray balls back to them. It's fun! - and the energy starts to build and develop again. Still working with little bits here and there, but I persevere. I am able to gather some wind occasionally, and the subtlety and smallness of it all is developmental.

By the time I am sitting, after about 3 hours, I feel pretty good.

I remember now that yesterday I saw that the rains are coming. It looked like several days of rain in the afternoons, building from today. But today the chances look lower. And the yi says that Dense clouds do not rain. Liu Yiming notes that: Yin energy coalesces as clouds, yang energy arrives as rain. As long as clouds do not rain, the yin energy is prevalent while the yang energy is weak, and the living potential is on the verge of cessation; that which is near, in oneself, is not even taken care of, so how could one seek that which is afar, in the other? ...

Which applies to what I feel in the energy of my cultivation as well as the likelihood of it raining today.

 

[Daeluin]

Phew, things have been busy.

Yesterday all I set out to do was do my training and go to work.

I knew something was up about the energy healing path, so I made those inquiries to the yi and got some good answers. And at work I asked a few people about their approach too, which I wrote about in that thread, along with those session experiences.

It was very timely though. I'm discovering that there's no time for anything but showing up. Haven't watched a show in a couple weeks, and barely get time to read the book that is helping me to tap into past life stuff.

Indeed, by the end of work, it is POURING. Torrential. Downpour. About an hour before sunset.

I feel good, accomplished, and proud of my efforts. I remember my friend had mentioned something about wanting to see a show tonight, so I look into it and realize A) it is right around the corner and B) it is sold out.

I text my friend (same from the GB road) about it and apparently they forgot too. I wander over there to see if there is a chance to get a ticket, and sure enough at the door someone is handing out two free tickets they can't use. I'm able to get one of them and let my friend know they can come!

Turns out there are speakers out front, in the enclave sheltered from the rain. So I figure I'll come back after getting some food nearby. And I do! My friend comes and gets the ticket, points out the nearby rainbow to me, goes inside, and I eat happily watching the rain outside while I listen to a great show.

It's the kind of show that draws out the children of the earth. So I keep seeing amazing people and among many of them people I haven't seen in a long while, including while I'm getting food to go before heading back. While I'm there, lightning strikes right on top of us, or what feels like it.

I remember mentioning something about the storm not breaking unless there is enough yang? Well that second massage I gave pulled in a lot of yang, if nothing else did, and the restaurant is right below where I work. Who knows. Odd though as most of our storms don't have much lightning if any.

Back at my private venue out front (aside from the smokers coming out from time to time), it has become dark and I'm really enjoying the music. Hopped up on a bench in full lotus, meditating. I hear lyrics about following the north star home, wow. So daoist. And at the end of the song an old housemate hops up next to me and we reconnect.

I feel like I'm there to ground the space a bit, or something. I don't know. But I'm taking it all in. The stage is right behind me, on the other side of the wall, facing a big crowd of amazing people. Someone offers to sell me a ticket and I almost do it, but then realize that would be overwhelming and I like my space out here.

A bit later it gets a bit more chaotic in my space out here, and there's starting to be too much smoke and altered people for keeping comfortable, though I've been super grounded all throughout, and don't feel much different even by the time I take my friend home.

Definitely absorbed a bit of ... stuff, don't think as much from the massage as from the concert. Do a bit of horse stance qi gong and circle walking before bed. Feel great and clear again. Nice night.

---

Wake shortly before my alarm, at 5am, to the sound of a cat freaking out about something, in an altercation, I don't know. Seems like time to get up.

Start by reading up on the Cantong Qi monthly sequence, which I realize I'm not sure which ordering feels right to me. midnight to noon, or sunrise to sunset.

It clearly says at dawn, and then at sunset, but then it also clearly lays out the boundaries of the 6 stems from zi to chen, and from wu to hai.

Book I Section 3:

In one month there are six nodes of five days;
warp and weft abide by the command of the Sun.
Altogether they are sixty:
the firm is external, the yielding internal.

At dawn of the month's first day, Zhun ䷂ is on duty;
when sunset comes, Meng ䷃ duly takes charge.
One hexagram for each day and each night:
their operation follows the Sequence.

With Jiji ䷾ and Weiji ䷿ comes the clear light of the month's last day;
after the end there is another beginning.
The Sun and the Moon set periods and measures;
movement precedes, quiescence follows.

Spring and summer accord with the innor core,
from zi to chen and si;
autumn and winter match the outer function.,
from wu to xu and hai.

Reward and punishment respond to spring and autumn;
dimness and light comply with cold and heat.
The Statements on the Lines contain humanity and righteousness,
and issue joy or anger in accordance with the time.

Thus by responding to the four seasons,
the five agents attain their principle.

I figure that a day like today might make some sense of it.

Morning energy of nature seems very tranquil and peaceful, though in my cultivation I'm definitely clearing a bit... and I realize that if the previous day's energy felt like earth from hexagram 7 and 8, that today's feels rather metal, from all that heaven and lake energy of 9 and 10. Metal is dry, and my qi feels dry.

But as usual, persistence pays off. Same as before, by the time I'm getting into the forms after the exercises, I feel like the qi is coming.

Next I need to take my housemate to the airport, and my car has been acting up so I go get my radiator and oil topped off, grab a sealant for my real main seal leak, and a pan to place under my car to catch the leak now that I'm not running on basically no oil. Great. Car purrs a bit more.

As expected from my last trip to the airport a few weeks ago (housemate makes a lot of trips I guess), the interstate is backed up, and this time I make sure to have clear directions for my alternate route before we set off and he is amenable. But radiator still overheats, there and back again.

Not fluids this time, but when stopping. Fans aren't coming I realize later. Check fuses before headed out again, seem fine, not sure about relay, but this car has had some funky electrical stuff. Had to disable the alarm system creatively because it would go off randomly. Same with headlights.

Work is good, though I'll update about those massages in the healing thread. Except to say that my last client's were high and a little off. My coworker seemed to love them though, and then later opened up to me about their past shao lin training, with a teacher that was oddly withholding information about lineage and tradition from students for some reason.

Night is definitely feeling off. Earlier it kinda started after my first sessions, when the second one had noted (in the wrong place) that they preferred a female therapist, but somehow we gave them two male therapists. And sure enough he was a hard pass on working with a guy. I found a solution by swapping with my other coworker, who showed up just in the nick of time. To make it work I needed to swap both next sessions with her, and the person running the front desk couldn't figure out how to do that for a while because they blocked each other, until they found the override and fixed it. Then we learned that they followed their intuition to call the next couple, who also passed on having a male therapist. But then 2 minutes later the session filled with my high couple.

Pretty odd though, as I've never actually been turned down before for being a male therapist at this location, but then it happens twice in one night! Definitely starting to feel like the yin of the hexagram 12, obstruction, but it could also be the last three lines of hexagram 11, tranquility. I'm not as familiar with those yet.

Anyway, after work, out in town, grabbing food to go... yikes. People everywhere, to be expected for 4th of July weekend, but it's off. I am followed for a full 2 blocks by a guy who can't stop coughing and hacking up phelgm, clearly he's got something going on and it quickens my step a bit, but he's walking fast too! And lots of people just kinda seem to be well into their conditioning. There's less of a excited innocent feel to the air and more of a aimless falling off the path feel to the air.

While waiting for food, I look up the cafe my friend texted me. It's nearby, looks amazing online, friend wants to set a time to go. I walk past it on my way back to the car, and double back, as I didn't see it... find the number, and it has got a different name now. Could be the same business though, but just that kinda night.

Sure enough my car's brake lights are on (from the rain again tonight I think, remember weird wiring), and the oil pan I tucked underneath has been stolen! No worries, jump start it up with the battery pack (so useful, this is a thing, saves me every time), but of course it'd happen tonight.

Hope over the the grocery and get stuff I need like probiotics, shampoo and conditioner, and I see a cheap plastic tray I can replace the oil pan with, and it might not get stolen. It's dark now, so possibly we're in 12 line 4, not sure. But at home hop on ebay and order a cooling fan switch. Take a pic of my housemates VIN number they requested (oooh, a mandate!) Then eat and write this, catching up, as we move into line 5?

Thinking back to that cat cry this morning.

For me, if 11 starts at Zi, that's half past Zi, at true midnight. So 79 minutes before sunrise in the middle of the summer would be beginning of 3.

Or, beginning of line 6, of hexagram 10.

Definitely seems like hexagram 11 though. Yiming notes: At this time it is mandatory to know when to advance and when to withdraw. If one remains upright in difficulty, forestalling danger, wary of perils, only then can one be free from the fault of losing what has been gained.

And just a bit before that: The three yangs full, as yang culminates it must shift to yin; when tranquility ends there must be misfortune. ...

So I'd guess that cat chose a wrong time to advance or withdraw.

Then, 6 yins for the daylight hours. With lots of challenges and conditioning. Is it always like this? My day sure was full of evidence of it. And now basically right at the end of hexagram 12 line 5. How curious that I used it to carefully reconcile how to calculate this, to avoid making an error of judgment.

I had a nice dinner while I wrote (brown rice and curry), and I suppose I'll do more training work before sleep, though I hope to get to bed earlier. But hard to pass up the opportunity to explore using line 6 to overturn line 5. Maybe in this case that is using qigong to empty what I just filled my mind with!

 

[Daeluin]

Erm... Goodmorning. YAwn.

Woke after abour 4 hours to a stone falling off a shelf. First thought was that I'd waken my housemate, but no he's gone. Next was that it was unusual, as it isn't the two stones I have with me in bed, it is something else that I didn't touch or move to make fall. Curious. I look at the time. We're in hexagram 13 line 2.

Sleep my last hour and wake in mid line 3.

In that time I dreamed of walking with a friend, and uh... they get eaten by an alligator.

We come upon a marshy area and go forward, but then there is an alligator in front of us. It isn't big or anything, and isn't fast. I close its mouth with my hands, lift its head back up over its neck and toss it aside. But more come, from all sides, and my friend is more dainty than me. I deal with another 2 and then turn to my friend, but they are gone. I dig into the marsh and pull up... their clothes, no body. Dig deeper, and body (now with clothes on again?!) comes up, with no head.

Oddly this doesn't wake me, though I am clear enough that I remember ever detail. Is very strange too as I have no grief with my friend, but a great working relationship.

Awake I see I have emails and look, and there is the link to the well gathering, where we are to discuss hexagram 4. Yay, incubation! Gestation! (Abortion!) We are to bring a reading if we have one. And I do. Of this very same friend - who hired me for another workplace at the end of 2020 and we both ended up being fired there and moving where we are now, which is becoming a healing collective of sorts. I had asked uh... What will _____ be looking for from me in my interview with her tomorrow for the massage therapist job at ___________? And I got hexagram 4 line 2. I have written: Taking in darkness is good, taking a wife is good; the heir ably takes over the family affairs. And I recall thinking that I am being incubated here to mature into a deeper role. Which is exactly what happened. Especially now that I am walking a more healing path.

I recall a dream about a burning car and my friends who had been traveling in it standing outside watching it. That dream actually recurred years later in massage school, and I looked it up and found it to be a positive omen. Sure enough the place where it indicated was a space of wonderful celebration out in the country.

So I look up this one. I see that it is not necessarily a bad omen either.

In Aztec cosmology, the crocodile, known as the Cipactli, symbolized the earth floating in the primeval waters, and appears as the symbol of the first calendar day of the Aztec calendar. The Cipactli symbolized the beginning of the earth and the beginning of all things that are created in the physical realm.

The Cipactli represented psychic powers, wisdom and the power of manifestation. The most powerful manifesting tool that we have is the power of the mind, and it is the source of where our reality is created.

Apparently it represents resolution of karma. Perhaps a balancing of sorts on a primeval level.

This person and I are on a karmic path. Just this week they first voiced the idea of no longer being just our manager, but going to massage school themself to start getting in on the healing work. Previously in a reading a while back they'd been told they would be helping to lead a collective of healers. Lately I've been saying that a collective is exactly what I feel I am a part of now.

Almost everyone this person has hired since I've been there is on a daoist path of some sort. It is uncanny. Three staff in acupuncture school, one goes by a daoist name, one does a form of trauma balancing massage based on chinese medicine, one is at the school my teacher is at, down the block, one has their own training in womb sovereignty based on a daoist path that works deeply with jing/vitality, and the person I worked with last night has a background in shaolin.

In any case I start to wonder if I am pushing this person. I happened to share this idea of their becoming a massage therapist with our front desk staff, just being all excited, and I guess I was only the second person to know. She walk by at that moment and I realized what I'd done and apologized for outting the secret and told them I wouldn't say it to anyone else.... then paused and mentioned but maybe you're on the hook now. To which she laughed and owned it a bit, but did seem to have anxiety. I let them know that when I was in the same place, very surprising to me, doors just started flying open and 4 months later I was in school. So that if it was meant to be, that they would be supported by the universe.

Between my hints at being in the collective they were prophecized to be a part of, and nudging them forward on their plans for massage school unintentionally, I think I am now the source of a push for them, and that is the source of the manifestation of this dream.

(During my cultivation I also remembered that yesterday I'd been thinking for the first time of how my super sensitive light working friend would ever approach a deep tissue massage, as it might be expected for them to encounter the same issue with stagnant qi being released into their field that I am now. I think this might've been another solid reason for the dream, perhaps a good chunk of the idea of them becoming consumed. After all, the whole thing about taking on other people's energy is related to the karmic exchange. Given that the alligator represents karmic balancing, perhaps I was seeing my friend becoming swallowed by karma? In this I can see it in a different light - one of a warning to share with my friend rather than an apology. But both sound good to me.)

But what does the yi have to say about this?

It could be line 2 or 3.

Line 2 is Sameness with people in the clan is regrettable. This is sort of pointing to racism, being only able to resonate with those who are like us, but unable to resonate with those not like us. Thus when we develop, we develop biases to these people and this keeps us small minded.

With line 3: Subduing fighters in the bush, climbing up a high hill, even in three years there will be no flourishing. Yiming notes: When one is too strong and bright and honors and aggrandizes oneself sometimes assimilation to others is forced and unnatural. ... Sameness on a high hill is being able to be the same as those who accord with oneself but unable to be the same as those opposite to oneself. ...

Line 3 seems more apt (or did before my other revelation - now sameness together but the challenge in working with those who are different makes so much more sense), in some sense. Interesting all around. This person actively practices sameness with others, to a fault. I think sometimes they get exhausted by trying so hard to stay positive. It is commendable. So we are same, but also different. I'm more bottom up, they are more top down. Our paths have resonance, but we are different.

Different enough that I might want to create a little more space for them and enable them more supportively in a way other than I have been doing when I just resonate with their own efforts.

Something to ponder on, now that I realize they might be feeling a little burdened.

Also after a day like yesterday, with all that yin obstruction to navigate, perhaps it had accumulated a little.

I finally wonder about that stone that fell this morning.

Like I said, it wasn't from around my bed, I didn't move it or hit something to make it fall.

I found it, and oh wow. It was a lovely single terminated quartz that had fallen from its perch over my bedroom door, to point right at where I was sleeping before I had the dream, and was a stone I had purchased from the friend I had the dream about.

Can't make this stuff up. And without following the yi cycle like I am, I wouldn't have ever probably remembered the dream or caught any of this syncrhonicity. Like I said, universe isn't allowing me much time for extracurricular activity, not even all that much sleep. Grumbling about 5 hours being technically enough and a shaman who mentioned that his students should strive to never get more than that. Like I said, different kind of shared reading.

OK, Sunrise is here and we enter the upper trigram with line 4 Mounting the wall, unable to attack. This is auspicious.

Off to do my morning routine across the street and prepare for the day. I have a Line 5 or 6 brunch planned with my client returned from Europe, and then a 14 line 1 or 2 massage planned with my GB road friend. Oh and a well gathering I might attend!

 

[Daeluin]

Cultivation work in line 4 is indeed unable to break through.

Again I feel the stiffness, but again, deeper within than before. I realize that the past three days I've really gone deeper layer by later. And the stiffness I take on at work goes to that layer too, making it harder to get too without deep sincere work. It is easy to let the surface be supple and not reach to the depths.

So that is what I do, I root deeper, more powerfully sinking into the yin of the earth. But it is hard. I am tired. Sleepy. Try to make the training into a nourishment like sleep. Deeply focused and engaged, but also barely present. Yet my mind is still pretty much present, not letting go.

Taijiquan is better, but it is in the horse stance qi gongs that I break through.

I almost don't.

We're in line 5 of hexagram 13 now, where the magic happens.

I'm still tired. Things become subtly more peaceful. I just want to stop and go in and update some posts with info that came through. Fortunately the momentum of doing this sequence 4 days in a row (the ~3 hour sequence of silk reeling, preheaven standing, stance training, tao qi gongs - earth water metal fire wood - into bagua into circle walking into sitting, opening to heaven, returning to mountain, then emptying myself of everything where giving and receiving are one.) So I persist, utilizing the momentum.

Yiming: When firm strength is in proper balance and correct orientation, the path is completed and one is full of virtue; before there was no one who was the same, but afterward there will surely be those who will emulate.

My breakthrough key is sinking my mind into my hips, into the rooted hip, and then the next rooted hip, always grounded. That lets me sink into the yin rooting into the earth better, and draws my mind away from obstructing the qi.

I start to get comfortable with the operation and it is nice. I'm drawing qi from the top of my head now but in a different way, more from the upper parts of my field, effortlessly connecting with the celestial.

Circle walking though is the real treat. It really lets me root into my hips, and connect with the alternating motion, to the point where I almost feel invisible.

Sitting is nice. At the end, arms in a circle with palms pressed out, round, emptying, giving, receiving, and opening out to the sides to connect in all directions, well... well I feel aware that there are so many people in this city for the holiday weekend, and wondering how this may reach them, intending nothing but what the dao needs.

This is the first time I feel in my own training like I used to feel sometimes by the end of cultivation class.

And the first time I've been able to connect what I feel in the cultivation class and forms to the more martial forms.

No mistake this is part of the magic of the timing and working in operation with hexagram 13 line 5. Which is still in operation for my longitude now btw.

Oh how I long for an epsom salt bath...

 

[Daeluin]

@moss elk - In reply to your deleted post just now Have you always been a loner?

I respond with this: https://www.reddit.com/r/taoism/comments/84jpij
It is a good question, really. In daoist cultivation we don't seek emotional states. And the state I am right now is a wonderful example of why.... I feel so absolutely content and at peace within myself. And I feel incredibly connected to everything around me, as my path unfolds with great synchronicity.

Even as I allow my path to unfold the way it needs to without attachments or expectations other than to the lessons I am being given to transform and heal and grow, I am amazed by the level of human connection I am interacting with, including meeting many past friends.

Like the friend I'm about to go have brunch with, who sought me out for massage after spending 6 months in europe. I had previously worked with them for a full year, multiple sessions every month. As we got to know each other we realized we both had resonance and followed a path. And when they returned, the timing of my path and my cultivation work allowed them to receive a beautiful healing. It felt so incredible to be able to connect with someone on this level, and to know that it could've only happened had I been doing my work and reached out to my teacher at the right timing to receive their energy that day.

It is really hard for me to comprehend this concept called 'loneliness'...

 

[Daeluin]

@moss elk said:
Daeluin said:
It is a good question, really.
I think so too, that's why I asked it. :]

However, The question you answered is not the one I asked.
So, that begs another question:

Did you intentionally avoid it?

Being a loner and being lonely are not one and the same.

I hear that you don't see the answer.

I suppose I can also elaborate more. I'm not sure what a 'loner' is - a label of some kind? I think that many people carry a lot of trauma with them that influences their path and how they integrate with the world. Others may project labels onto them because of their behaviors, but really in the end this just adds to their burdens, so I personally don't think in those sorts of ways. Each person's path has its own merits and struggles, and I don't think any of us are free from them.

Let they who have not sinned cast the first stone. And so forth.

 

[Daeluin]

Wow, what a weird afternoon.

Brunch with my friend is great, I get to hear what it was like to be in France during the elections after the relative peace in Italy, etc.

Line 5 is being in the world and being out of the world at the same time.

I did not live up to this much. Events conspired oddly and I didn't navigate the solutions as well as I could have. But it is very much like the GB road story, and turns out it involves that friend too.

First my phone charger died, though back then I thought it was a problem with dust in the port. I spent a bit of time trying to clean the port with a sharp object, but it put off my epsom salt bath. And then I just go to my brunch. But in the rush I lock my keys in the car. I'm not bothered by that and go to enjoy a great conversation and meal.

It was so nice catching up with someone who is also on a path unfolding with synchronicity like mine!

Forest of Changes 13 - 49

Huge mountains in each of the four directions,
The path is blocked.
Wanting to move forward,
But turning back for home.

There were a lot of blockages that held me back, but I didn't turn back for home so I guess I didn't let the line change.

• My phone wouldn't charge and I sacrificed my bath soak to figure it out, but still left on time.
• I locked my keys in the car with the brake lights on but simply left it for later.
• There was a long line to get into the restaurant, as there were actually no tables for a while and the door was blocked, but we just chatted and waited.
  
  And then the conversation and the food were all fantastic, as we were serenaded by live saxophone music.

---

Afterward we are about to navigate toward getting my car unlocked together, and while I wait for my friend in the bathroom, I get drawn into an odd political conversation about the structure of control in the country, and I end up dropping some seeds about how rule by principle helps us go from rule by law to self-so rule. But really we are are just dancing back and forth. What is really the point?

Then my friend helps me grab some tools from another friend's house, and is there with me while we spend 10 minutes trying to get my car unlocked with a aluminum wire passed through the corner of the door held cracked by a screwdriver while the passenger side back door is unlocked because that is where my housemate got his things yesterday and somehow I didn't lock it again at work yesterday. The aluminum wire keeps bending around the lock because it is softer than the steel hanger I had used last time this happened.

Eventually I figure out that the back door is unlocked and we laugh and talk about the lessons.

We're clearly in hexagram 14 line 1 now, starting at least as early as the conversation with that guy:

Forest of Changes 14 - 33:

Stepping in mud, getting the feet dirty,
Bringing shame to your name and exhausting your body.
Two enemies are evenly matched,
Both suffer alike.

What is interesting is that these lessons lead to two very significant outcomes.

1. It leads my two friends to potentially connect.
2. And because of all the exhaustion, the massage I have scheduled with my GB friend can't work out.
   
   Not only can it not work out, it is a situation where they all of a sudden have no car, are exhausted, and where I all of a sudden am unable to drive for two hours, expecting them to be here.
   
   My phone finally died, and I didn't see their text.
   My battery was dead.
   My battery charger, which gets a lot of use, was drained.
   
   So I couldn't even give them a ride. But also the communication is very off. So it all feels very not meant to be.

So that was pretty odd, and very much in line with the timing.

I myself am hardly exhausted, but this is also a line I just got in regards to the healing work. This is the line I am learning to operate with in massage, to avoid giving too much of myself, but to struggle to hold back until eventually I am able to strike the proper balance, which can lead to Great Possession. Pretty hard to accumulate Great Possession when starting from a foundation that is exhausted!

All in all, a lot to learn from in navigating the lines like this.

It becomes very clear how educational this might become if one lives each lunar cycle like this. I imagine one would really start to master the lines and understand the traps hidden within their changes.

Indeed:

To set up righteousness, establish the punishments;
when humanity is in order, let virtue come forth.
"Those who transgress this have ill fortune;
those who comply with it have good fortune."

Thoroughly consider the laws and the ordinances,
with utter sincerity and concerted attention;
cautiously watch the markers of time,
attentively inspect the ebb and flow.
Even with the smallest of errors,
regret and remorse would possess you.

 

[Daeluin]

I'm not sure what a 'loner' is - a label of some kind?

I'd been musing on this and realizing it could unfold into a nice explanation, even before some other stuff unfolded. It can also explain what I'm doing here a bit.

Essentially I find that labels tend to close doors and write things off. Discernment can keep doors open.

It's like the old saying "there are only stupid actions and choices, not stupid people". No one benefits from carrying around a Scarlet Letter.

So just like thrown stones, labels are a kind of projection, and well, I think it is understandable that people use them, but they confuse me a little. After all, we are always changing. How can a label be very accurate for long?

So what is a loner?

There may be lonelieness in a person, that comes and goes. Loneliness is a state of attachment. One may be happily alone without being lonely. Like I hinted at, is one ever really alone, if they are aware of all the connections they are surrounded by? Is there really a state where someone is permanently lonely, for good, all said and done, without their own self-so choice to block other things out? Is this a loner?

But such a choice is not possible. By the nature of the oneness of the universe, we are all connected, and therefore never alone. Even Pluto is connected. So how could a person living on a planet not be connected? Such a total closing out of everything around them would result in the inability to exist.

And yet, the question of being apart from others can indeed be constructive here:

I had spoken about trauma being a heavy burden. It is also a burden that those who struggle through it discover creates a lot of change.

For myself, the more effort I took at changing some of the deep trauma I carried, the more people who had been in my life previously, would be naturally replaced by new people, with new lessons.

When we have roommates who don't clean up after themselves and set a boundary around it, we stop getting those kinds of roommates and get new ones with new lessons for us to learn.

Sometimes old friends simply can't connect with us when we have changed, and find their expectations of us betrayed by the new people we have become.

I found that when I posted in Shared Readings answering other people's questions to the yi, that others met me with contention over our interpretations. Despite the invitation for debate on these forums, I felt there was insistence, that there was a right or wrong and that my perspective could be damaging to others.

Therefore I changed, and began writing my own threads and answering my own questions. I did this because it seems we speak a different language when it comes to the yi and I'm not sure if others find my interpretations welcome.

Despite that, this is a public community where a plethora of perspectives are embraced, so I chose to share in my own way to avoid contention with those who have an agenda here and need things to fit into the boxes they are comfortable with.

In this way, others are allowed access to my interpretations, and this information may still be shared in the community for those who come for it and are in resonance with it, while those who are not may ignore it, or ignore me.

I am not alone, for I am part of the whole, and when one part moves, all parts move. Yet I am still able to try to be humble and also be myself, without stepping on other people's toes here.

 

[Daeluin]

So today was another very on point and educational set of events.

Woke before sunrise and did some meditation. 15 line 3, the one yang line that uses the power of its humility to turn yin into yang in the other lines. In my meditation, my solar plexus was demanding attention and I worked with it. It occurred to me that the solar plexus, on the front channel, the yin receptive vessel, is similar in concept to line 5 in the sea of yins, right down to its placement.

I was denied my autonomy for 18 years growing up, so it has taken some time to do that healing work, but it is finally kicking in. The last time it kicked in, early in the year, I made a discovery about how it can blaze up and want to control things forcefully, and yet... if we study the principles of the Vishnu Granthi, we learn that navigating this knot between the solar plexus and the heart requires forgiving all betrayals.

The parallel to line 5's humility is striking. When I was able to surrender to seeing from many perspectives last time, instead of being a concentrated fire of conviction in one place, it became unblocked and the energy was able to move up and down. It was the humility that made this possible.

Cultivation was lovely - I meditated a bit with line 3 before going outside and doing my training during line 4 and 5.

I was able to pick up where I left off and sink into my hips, and that lead to a whole different level of energy work. Very nice.

Around the beginning of line 5, I had an idea come to mind, and stopped training to write an email. There is a business in town that maintains a living wage certification standard for other businesses - so that people can patronize businesses that pay their employees a certified living wage.

However there are also lots of great places that don't pay a certified living wage before tips. I'm getting tired of being expected to tip at places I frequent, despite being in the service industry myself, for service that deserves no tipping to begin with. I make an order and pick up my food, then self bus my own table that doesn't even get wiped down.

So I had a thought about a punch card - every time I tip it gets punched until I tip $100. Then I can turn the card in and ask them to take it to their owner. And it can say something like - in good faith I have helped you pay your employees $100 toward a living wage with my tipping. That is my limit, please pay your workers a certified living wage, for I cannot continue to pay their salaries for you.

I can make this myself, but it would be received better, and spread much further, if the business that sets the standard provides cards like this.

So I sent the email on the spot. It seemed like a very hexagram 15 line 5 thing to do.

---

After cultivation, I cam back and ran into some issues where I posted a user's private message as a way to hold them accountable, but this created backlash for it is against the rules to share private messages with third parties, in principle.

In the moment, it resulted in a conversation that allowed an understanding to be arrived at between me and this forum member, and yet I see that it was not humble to post the private message without understanding the rules.

Understanding this has lead me to realize how challenging true humility can be. For the moment we have conviction about moving forward with something, we can so easily overlook something else that is not appropriate.

This also lead me to some revelations around how hexagram 15 line 6 operates. Some interpretations suggest that it can be used to conquer enemies, and yet the Forest suggests that if this line changes, it is slovenly.

In any case, both yesterday and today's line 6 and line 1 have been very potent.

I also made some revelations about the sequence so far.



Outside of the red lines is night, inside is day.

The first two days were double water. Then double earth every other day.

In experiencing it in real life, it's kinda a lot to have 6 yin lines every other day, during the daylight hours. Feels like a bit of a roller coaster. Especially the last three days, with the obstruction, followed by all that yang, and so on. It is curious how this sequence seemingly fits the waxing and waning of the moon. I'm sure confirmation bias can be a thing, and I've experienced it before with yi sequences. But this feels a little too accurate so far.

As far as broadcasting / excitement goes.... well guess what happens in the US after sunset on the 4th of July? I'm not partaking, but there are a lot of fireworks.

Of course it'd have to line up with THIS lunar cycle. Like... that's once a year, and doesn't really count. But sure is uncanny. Like really?

After that I happened upon a housing ad that seemed resonant and sent a query / intro, but the next morning when I consulted the yi about it, it gave 56 lines 3 and 4 active. Too strongly on my path to harmonize and accomplished, but unable to carry forward the path to any great extent. In hind sight this was probably an ad discovered and replied to during 16 line 5, the one where something could be possible but is pretty unlikely.

 

[Daeluin]

Three hexagrams to cover...

Following was very pleasant and harmonious. Simple easy morning. Woke early, an hour of light cultivation before headed to grab a bite and then to morning shift. All couples massages, all went pretty well, all loved my work. Healing work became more refined.

First client was just glowing after, no issues with stiffness. Second client was hard to deal with the stiffness in, I did a bit of cleansing. I also noticed that my solar plexus would activate a bit more when I was sinking into my hips and not leaning forward as much. The solar plexus helped me to keep my boundaries a bit and burn up the energy through my cleansing instead of sending it into the center of the earth to be burned away.

But I still had issues with the stiffness. After the massage I realized that it was mental energy and was associating with my mind. The more I was in my mind the more it could find me. So I needed to empty my mind. Then I realized that when my teacher does push hands, people can't feel that they are touching them. They can see it but not feel it. If I ever get that far, I suppose it would be interesting giving massages that people can't feel. But that's just amusing, as by then I would have changed the type of person I am working on and the type of work I do.

I get to put this into practice a little with my last client. This person does a lot of self-care, and I only have issues with stiffness around their mid-back. Otherwise I'm actually able to do deepish pressure, even though I'm not being pulled through the top of my head, and probably not quite clear enough for that today. It is also faster, but I meditate with eyes closed to keep my mind from being very present at all for a good bit of the work. They rave.

I'd guess the work today is using more of my own energy than from the top of my head, even though I'm just using my own energy to keep theirs at bay a bit and not trying to use it to transform anything. So I need to get better at that.

---

After work it is now hexagram 18. Before I leave, I end up having a chat with our new front desk therapist, who is about to start 4th year in acupuncture school. We end up discussing flavors and their organ associations, which modern convention gets completely wrong, because of one chart in the Su Wen despite another chapter that spells it out. Very line 1.

I get some food and come back home to eat and do a write up on the flavors from a different translation. Yeah they don't match the five phase cycle.

I also go back and forth a bit more with someone on reddit who acts like they know something about daoist philosophy, but seem to be missing the mystery, or the importance of it.

The issue with my GB friend and the obstacle around the massage from last week comes up again and I make some boundaries.

Yesterday I planned to do some work on my tiny house to prepare it for showing. The main work is clearing out all the poison ivy that has grown in a thicket around the back and two sides. So I got to the hardware store and get a tyvek suit and a bunch of protective gear (If I get poison Ivy I can't work).

I drive over, and then I stop and take care of some things with my car. First I've had a long standing issue with my brake light not registering off, and I figure out that it is the pad the button presses into that is all soft and indented. I order a new one on the spot. This is one of the main reasons my battery will die, even though I religiously check to see if my brake lights are on. ($300 car saved from being crushed btw, it is OK to have some quirks.) Next, there is one tail light that fills up with water when it rains and then leaks into the trunk when I open it, and in so doing, gets water into its wiring. So I just knock a hole in the bottom of it and it drains out. Easy and not worth wasting time on. Both of these issues were very frustrating and so easily resolved.

Then I don the gear from head to toe and go at it, clearing an overgrown path, pulling some weeds, and finally getting at the ivy. Some people call it sister ivy to be nice, but to me it is an old friend even with poison in the name. We have a good relationship, and it is beautiful. I'm sad it needs to go, but I do what needs to be done. I know it will just come back.

Two hours in it thunders and pours. Torrential. I move some bamboo that was leaning against the side, wander out to the trash cans and shed my protective layer straight into it and drive home.

It sure fit the theme well. I knew it did going in, but had already gotten a message from the yi that I needed to make this a priority to turn yin to yang, and this was the first opportunity.

At home I get a reply back from my GB friend about boundaries, and there is still some murkiness, so I explain why I'm setting boundaries. It was not a fun situation to be in, and it felt like the universe was conspiring to not let that session happen.

It is a firm but clear text, and somewhat in the model of my teacher's example. When people around my teacher don't change, they repeat themselves a second time, and allow the behavior for a while. Then my teacher does what they call weeding their garden, by pressing a little harder to see if people are sincere. A lot of people will just leave, freeing the class up for new students. I'm not exactly trying to weed my friend out, but there is something not connecting about the part of the dual relationship that involves massage and it feels uncomfortable to me.

I make some food and eat. Just about half of what I used too, showing good temperance and discipline. I've always been a bottomless pit, but this new 5-6 hour sleep cycle and going to be early somehow is helping me make better decisions. And at some level I think I was tapping into the mountain energy containing the pressure of the wind. It was subtle but I felt pressed to make the correct choices.

Order a new phone charger since my old one got fried somehow. Lightning surge?

At the end I text the reddit guy some more. I'd opened up a little in following, but in correction I closed up gain - asking a key question to see if they really knew what they were talking about, and saying that if they knew about this, then they could understand what I meant. And that if they didn't I wouldn't deny them the opportunity of self discovery. I guess that had a bit of its own pressure.

---

Morning, I wake at 4:30, thirty minutes before my alarm. End of nineteen line 2. I look at my phone and see I have a new reply from the reddit person, just a one liner. I see that it goes into the classic reclaim destiny and shed the shell and abandon nature dogma, which I don't agree with, because it leaves behind the recipe of balance and I'm pretty sure I've been on the other side before and have been the Bodhisattva before. This time I know what the balance is and it involve anchoring the three realms together and healing the universe, not just the self. This ends a bit into line 3, which is interesting. Here I am actually withdrawing the persumption of others rather than making my own, which according to Liu Yiming is overseeing that rejects the false and returns to the true.

Then I am feeling calm and restful, and meditate for the rest of line 3. Then cast the tarot. Loss. King of Swords. VII. I read about them. I think I know what the loss is.

In line 4 I consult the yi about my housing options, as I see last night that I have a reply from the ad I inquired about, inviting a connection tonight. I ask about the blockage in this one place and receive 14 lines 2, 3 and 6, which combined with my other reading is now all yang lines for hexagram 14. But these make sense of that blockage. The teacher I think is working with the people running this little community requires impeccability. So the answer seems to be in line with that. I need to follow through on the work I am doing, and then maybe something will open up.

But I also ask about the invitation to connect about this new one, despite the lack of potential resonance with me being firmly on my path and possibly not being a good fit for a more light-hearted household. I get 7 unchanging. Another 7 for a housing situation. I already know that I need to be looking for resonance, not trying to operate under constraints or tread lightly in the midst of danger. So I send my no email and cordially thank them, and suggest that person we can connect again in another way since they seem nice.

I ask about how I might know what my next right spot is for me. 33 line 2. Thanks, sigh. Yep, I get it. This is a Leo operation, fully containing the pride/qi such that the stillness is without question and impenetrable / tying the ox hide. (Speaking of containing, the clouds unleahsed a big downpout just now.)

I ask about waiting to see what shows up next and get 16 unchanging. Seems positive. The Forest:

The snow and ice is about to melt,
The wild goose is heard.
At year's end the eldest son marries the maiden,
Their union can be formed,
A sagely is man among their descendants.

The reddit reply comes, different this time. Respectful and asking if I would make any recommendations. So I do. It takes a little longer. Still line 4. Consummate Overseeing is blameless.

I get out to my cultivation a little later, just into line 5, half past Chen.

However, it is very nice, very transformative, very emptying. My hip is struggling to open much (been a work in progress all along, seems the daily work really helps train it to be open), but I am able to connect back with my hips enough to root and practice being empty of my mind, and I start to connect and feel energy up my spine. By last bit of silk reeling, I manage to part the clouds very nicely and my third eye opens up and I've "emptied my mind to fill the belly." In wuji posture with feet together hands by the sides, the top of my head opens up very strongly.

I continue into the forms and tried to maintain this stillness and emptiness within movement. At the end of taijiquan I am in wuji again, connecting again, and the kids come out to play nearby. One starts goading me. "He's so still. .... He sucks! ..." and something else before a teacher pulls them away. I manage to stay centered for the most part, aside from being a little amused and wanting to laugh. A little later they are explaining a game that involves wizards, elves, and giants. It's a rock paper scissors tag. I sense my mind wanting to listen and understand, but instead I am able to practice observation of hearing the words without understanding them. I still don't know what wins over what. But I did crack up at one point. It was fun, I felt it come and allowed it, then used the distraction to recenter. It was good practice.

I go through the full routine, is is very developmental. I end half into line 6 and come back.

I have a response from the housing situation. The person replying is a fan of tai chi, acupuncture, chinese medicine, but respects my decision... It's funny, I knew the Loss card would be about this before I pulled the plug on it. And the Army unchanging can be OK to work with. I feel regret but at this point I'm getting clear answers from the yi, and all of the timing, however synchronous, was not in alignment with either the monthly cycle or the advice from the questions I asked, not to a great enough extent. So I'm trusting that I can follow the yi to something more resonant. It is just kind of unusual to find a place with a 12x12 bedroom a 10 minute walk from my work, with a yard I can practice in, for an actual decent price that isn't highway robbery like so much in this town. T_T

They do say they are interested in meeting up sometime and I reply that would be great, just let me know when!

Things develop more with my GB friend around boundaries. We are navigating something here together that is burdened by the dual relationship of friendship and massage.

And so Aquarius ䷒ transitions to Libra ䷓. Yay another day with all yin lines.

---

The conversation continues and I explain that my massage now is very different, and not likely to be helpful if they show up super stressed out. I explain that I can work best with them if they are doing a lot of self care and that my work then is more likely to reward their own work.

So far the past 24 hours is really on point. I especially like how I aligned with hexagram 19's overseeing almost to the line. At the time I couldn't really remember what it was about and didn't process it until now / line 6.

Now I'm hungry. Is eating food a small thing? I suppose so... after all the more spiritual we become the less food we need. I'm reminded of the Monkey King's first years and how all the light shining out that distracted the deities in heaven was said to be due to his eating and thus leaking. Original sin!

I'm still going to eat. But maybe some more cultivation first. Well a little. Now I think it's the perfect time to visit the discount food store... I'm still human!

 

[Trojina]

First client was pregnant, was just glowing after, not issues with stiffness. Second client was hard to deal with the stiffness in, I did a bit of cleansing. I also noticed that my solar plexus would activate a bit more when I was sinking into my hips and not leaning forward as much. The solar plexus helped me to keep my boundaries a bit and burn up the energy through my cleansing instead of sending it into the center of the earth to be burned away

It's just occurred to me that you identified yourself when you posted a video here recently. You are now describing your clients and so potentially people may know who your clients are and what they're going through which is a bit of a risk re confidentiality between you and the client isn't it?

That is if someone sees your video here and knows you/knows of you/sees you in the local grocery store and in the park etc they also now know about the pregnant lady and the gall bladder person etc etc. It's not such a big deal I guess if you only speak about them very vaguely. Also I suppose this may be something some therapists do - go online, reveal who they are then write about their clients but generally it's kept very vague and distant.

I'm just thinking supposing I were treating people for health issues then posted a video of myself here and then talked about their current treatment would I feel uneasy? I think I would unless I had the client's permission.

I'm just wondering if that's an issue for you?

I get to put this into practice a little with my last client, who is a modern ballet dancer whose mother is a massage therapist. This person does self-care, and I only have issues with stiffness around their mid-back.

So there's a lot of information there you're giving away about this ballet dancer. Her profession, her stiff back and what her mother does and the fact she sees you.

I'm seeing my osteopath tomorrow and I would be very unhappy - indeed I would finish with her if I found she was writing about me on some forum that she had worked with me that day and what my problem was and what my profession was and what my mother did. To start with how much do you need to share those details about your clients? What about client confidentiality? Did you ask the ballerina if you could write about her and her back and her mum? These aren't the most intimate details but they certainly are not what most therapists would think of sharing the very same day are they?

Sure Yi being a minority interest it isn't especially likely the ballet dancer's husband (for example) visits this site, recognises the dancer is his wife and so on. But supposing she has not told him she spends money on you, supposing she doesn't want him to know about her stiffness etc etc

 

[Daeluin]

Thanks for your concern @Trojina.

Yes, confidentiality is important. And we are also allowed to talked about experiences, in person, write case studies, etc. It is the details of case studies that provide the information necessary to learn from. We don't use names and don't need to conceal our identities. BTW the youtube channel doesn't have my name, though it can be found, but only my first name. I don't say where I live. I'm not publicizing this but hiding it in plain sight. The people who will be interested are not likely to be concerned with who anyone is, but about the details provided about changing circumstances and how synchronicity unfolds.

Identifying information is important to think about too, you're right. I can change the one about the dancer, it isn't very important, though I only included it because it conveys the context of the type of self-care they got.

I've written a lot about my GB friend. And though I've concealed even their gender, you're right if you think it is personal.

I'd like to conceal more, maybe I can do that. At this point the story is resolved, so I think I can clean it up. The important parts are about the synchronicities and how change is operating.

To update, I received a response about what I communicated about how my massage has changed to my friend, and they chose to go with different healing options, but we are still friends. That resolves the issue of the dual relationship and also resolves the issue related to hexagram 14. If they had been interested in working together I would have loved that, but they didn't seem interested any more. It fits perfectly with how my teacher weeds the garden. Now the friendship can just be simple and it isn't part of my path any more. Whatever changes they make are their own, and whatever we do together is just friendship, and not bound by the karmic responsibility it was when I had been in the role of sharing in their healing work.

I'd like to preserve the parts that allow this ending to be understood, which will require some detail, esp in regards to Sunday, but I will do my best to make it more vague.

 

[Daeluin]

Hexagram 20 line 3, it turns out has an interesting operation. Observing personal growth, promoting and repelling.

I notice that at the end of it now I feel like I've done a few re-evaluations of my path, and also re-evaluated who I am now vs who I've been in the previous weeks. A change is maturing within me and allowing me to see lack of refinement in my previous self, and this leads to a desire to change to become more refined.

Line 2 I spent shopping and eating and reading. I was reading about the Intrinsic Energies of Tai Chi Ch'uan, which go into the skills of Sticking, Listening, Intepreting, etc that are developed in push/sense hands. I've not done a lot of push/sense hands work, as my teacher had reasons for preferring some set two person short forms and considered free flow two person work to be more advanced.

But with massage I can see how to practice these components. I guess this is me peeking into a certain direction and realizing how much I have to grow to be able to apply it correctly.

All this week I've felt proud of my taijiquan form, and yet now, traversing line 3, I feel I have so much more to practice within it to even build a proper foundation. I feel in a lot of ways I have a lot of growth work to do. I feel regret about the housing situation I just lost again (two housing situations lost, 2 army readings, two loss cards (3 of swords)). But within that loss is the feeling of surrendering to the path and knowing that I am changing. I've been reflecting on the morning reading as well around the changes I need to accomplish to get past the blockage in the healing community I would like to possibly at least visit and the yi says I have good resonance with, and how the teacher I think is involved with some of those people sets a very high standard, and wondering this past hour or so if I can work harder to uphold those standards even better. Reflecting on what it means to be impeccable, though I also am not a fan of extremes. I also realize how readily I was willing to modify my posts to ensure anything personal involving others was removed when Trojina asked.

The commentary fits perfectly (Yiming):

On the boundary of upper and lower observation, this is observing whether one's personal growth is good of bad, and promoting the good while repelling the bad. Observing one's own growth, if it is actually good, one promotes it, and also observes the good in others to increase one's own good where it is deficient. Observing something that is not good in one's growth, one withdraws from it and repels it, but does not immediately observe the good in others, first getting rid of what is not good in oneself. This is observation knowing when to advance and when to withdraw.

I hadn't read it until I posted this either. But it just felt unusual, like I was doing a lot of second guessing about what I was doing. So I came up and checked it out and wow that really fits.

---

In line 5...

I also notice that it is harder to empty my mind. There is a constant mental energy present, unlike with overseeing. I suppose this makes sense given the Libran association. That was also present with Virgo / 12, and both are associated with mental energy and both start with 3 yin lines. Leo Starts with two, but is able to lock it down, and hold onto some of the power. Virgo has 3 and works on the balance of obstruction. Libra has 4, and is taking it all in. But with Scorpio, like Leo, the operation now changes. Leo had lost the central line 2 and was holding on tight to preserve its energy. Scorpio has lost the central line 5, and is also hanging on tight, but without much left to preserve. So there is a different type of intensity, but both are intense. By the time we get to all 6 yins, the operation has changed again and Sagittarians embrace the openness available to explore, not knowing of the loss that came before.

 

[Daeluin]

21 is true to its name.

I wake in line 3 and don't remember much. Did a bit online, did more laundry.

By line 4 I'm studying again, now about the 8 energies of Chen style tajiquan. Peng, Lu, Ji, An, Cai, Lie, Zhou, Kao. I want to understand how they fit into my form better and shape up my energetic integrity before my first returning lesson on Monday. I get a sense of them and look up some videos, but they aren't really connecting, too much too fast.

But in the back of my head I'm thinking about what I read in Intrinsic Energies... about working with the lower dan tien, which I still haven't figured out. It mentions the lower abdomen needs to be Song, or relaxed-and-alert. We don't have a good translation. It's kind of like standby, or ready at a moment's notice. Like a cat able to be fully relaxed, then tense all of its muscles all at once and then immediately relax them again, which is how they jump so high.

Before the end of 4 I'm out cultivating. I can even feel the energy shift from 4 to 5. There is a softening and a clarity settling from the previous more yang forcefulness to the energy.

I'm focusing on my lower abdomen in the front, my soft tissues. It is developmental, and I notice my solar plexus is pretty active as well. I try to exercise the vishnu granthi to ensure the energy is not stuck and can move up and down without blocking. But still don't really have much happen in lower abdomen other than a distance awareness of holding space.

Now my third eye awareness that is inward focused, has a home to focus on, more or less.

However now, with focus on the lower abdomen, I'm not able to focus as much on my hips and alternating roots. I try to focus on both but there is a disconnection clearly.

At some point in my tajiquan form I finally break through. I know from past experience that line 5 is the best for this, so I try to make the most of it. I've done so much work on opening and sinking into my hips, and now I've focused on the lower abdomen... but my pelvic tilt is still off and my scarum and coccyx are still sticking out rather than being tucked in.

So I work on this, though it is frustrating. It helps that in line 5 last night I was observing my neutral stance posture in the mirror, so it is nice how that hexagram supports this one. I work out that it is when my hips are open but also more rounded, using more of my Vastus Lateralus / IT band, that my posture shifts forward a little and allows room for my lower back to tuck in a little. It feels weird and uncomfortable because now things are more compressed and my lower belly is more contained.

As I move with this and try to keep the posture connected, I have this sensation that my lower abdomen's front and back are now connecting better, and I am reminded of the lower abdomens of bee's and wasps and how they undulate. That feels like what I'm doing as I keep it all together through the movements.

And the achievement happens when I start to feel energy rising up my back. The first time it goes up one side to about my kidneys, and clearly seems to be clearing some space out. After that it is consistent when I maintain the posture, feeling some sensation from time to time, but more in my coccyx and sacrum.

This is huge! I finally get how the posture needs to be shaped in order to support energy in the lower dan tien. And how my rooting through the hips now connects to my lower back. And even an awareness that the LDT is further back than people tend to say, wondering if this is another interpretation for the classical saying the qi rises from the legs up the back and fills the lower dan tien, instead of the interpretation that it needs to orbit over the head and down the front to enter the LDT. I don't really know, but the connection is there none the less.

Now I have something to practice and develop more that can get me somewhere to access some of the other things need to develop. But without this none of that is possible. And, I understand better now how it all connects, so I can focus on the lower abdomen's front and back while also rooting to the legs if I practice more, I think.

In sitting the energy gathers and there is so much light this time. Curious. Maybe from doing it a little later in the day? Middle of Li? And maybe that time I felt more qi that compressed into jing in my sitting was more from an earlier practice before the wood turned to earth then to fire.

I'm curious what punishment/reward line 6 will offer. I come in and make some food, a nice stir fry with greens and alumes before I come up and see that it is just about to change.

Looks like I have an invite to share an upcoming lecture with someone. We'd talked about it before but didn't plan things out. I try to join their discord server but the invite link is expired. (Now that sounds like line 6 lol.) My posts with personal info are edited with Trojina's help, but two are swapped, so we get them swapped back.

Going to wait for the line to finish and then spend 22 working on the inside of my tiny house. I need to take off the trim, tape over the floor, spackle some holes, sand some rough edges, and paint. Sounds perfect for 22.

If I hadn't been following the cycle I might've done this yesterday. But when I looked it seemed like not the right energy with observing. Today is spot on, and the last day I have for a while.

Maybe I'll clean out my car while I wait.

 

[Daeluin]

Synchronicities are unfolding nicely. And not getting time to post. We'll see if I can find some later. Things are converging as we approach the full moon... which is still so far away, gosh.

 

[Daeluin]

So... currently in 28 line 3. And left off at 22.

22 works out pretty well. Line 1 is a bit of shopping and checking in with the property owner.

Line 2 I get busy cleaning and preparing what needs to be done, sanding down some nail holes, etc. I also uncover some the only water damage in the spot where I had a salt lamp that sweat excessively. I get that spot uncovered and set a fan on it to dry out over the next few days.

By line 3 I am ready to make some progress, and also exhausted and hungry. I note that: perpetual rectitude is auspicious. And go to get a quick bite to eat before returning to focus on what needs to be done.

Some of the drywalling was originally not done well enough to conceal the tape, and I didn't know what nailers were so some of the corners were affected by not having supports. So the work of this line ends up being taking the time and patience to screw metal joiners into the re-wall (a mold resistant tetrapack drywall alternative that is also structurally sound).

This is the bit that I was concerned about and not sure how to resolve. But with some resolve from the yi's line statement, I persevere and actually make great headway at adding to the structual integrity of the walls and creating a foundation for a nicer looking place for the next potential owner.

Line 4 rolls around with sunset, and I move into filling the holes with spackle. and shoring up the bad spots. This progresses nicely as well, and I suppose the white spackle is my white horse, hah!

I'm not able to paint yet because of the time it will take things to set, and I need to dry out that wet spot.

But now I can actually start to see how worth it creating these structural changes was.

---

With hexagram 23 I have another nice cultivation morning. I do a bit of reflecting on Scorpio and Stripping away. However I come to realize that there are positive and negative lines, and that it isn't surrendering to death after all that causes the Scorpion to be reborn as the Phoenix, but instead learning to accept fate and turn it around to become the return.

I come in after cultivation right on time for my (forgotten about) seminar with on healing society in times of crisis with the eight extraordinary vessels.

It is amazing. Our teacher is revealing a lot of stuff that hits home. And a lot that can be applicable to my own inner healing as well as my unfolding healing journey at work.

Lunch break comes, feeling very over-downloaded, and I realize we're in 24 line 1. I still have an hour before work so I do qi gong cultivation, curious what the energy will be like. I am not disappointed. Who knew what was hidden in this timing.

With a big energy I didn't remember to ground adequately, I go to work and try to operate my healing in a big field with my first client. My coworker sees my big field and says I'm giving away free energy, not that that is a bad thing. They ask if I am a generator...

My next session is more challenging and I still feel the stiffness I absorbed from the first session in exchange for my field. I notice I am cranky and bothering my coworker.

I text my teacher and ask about training to work with this energy exchange, related to some instructions I was given. Since I have an appointment on Monday I'm asked to check with the assistant, which makes sense.

At home in line 4-5 I do my cultivation work again to help deal with the stiffness, and it does release and refine and I am feeling much lighter again. I don't reach that nice energy again, though the principle of returning again and again becomes clear in how I have been working. It keeps drawing me back to rectitude.

---

25 - Fidelity. This is a nice progression from the earlier rectitude, as I am set up already for working with integrity.

I wake early and consult the yi about my healing work. I get some very good perspectives, and understanding how I can work becomes more clear.

I learn that if I only sink low and ground to the earth, I still draw the vibration into me. 18 line 4.

But that if I root not just to earth but become empty between heaven and earth, allow my fingers to be moved by my feet, and balance the pressure between these three poles, I can navigate without the stiffness finding a home in me. 42 lines 5 and 6.

I also learn that if I apply the right principle, I can also clear acupuncture points without releasing vibration. Hexagram 34 lines 1 and 4.

Training is nice and I am making slow progress.

More lecture on healing meridians today. I learn that the heart is cultivated from the central channel, and it comes from the development of following our path. Spirit likes stillness is something my teacher said a lot. I associated shen with the top of the head a bit, but now I see that is more yang, this is more fire that can become yang, and is also related to the third eye, in terms of what is missing from the inside. But the work of retrieving it back comes from following our path and working on our destiny. The satisfaction of that work creates the home within.

This is big for me, as in my childhood trauma my heart was rather beaten down and not given options to self-regulate, so after I was wide open for a while, then I just became drained and defeated, my power lost. Now I understand better how to cultivate the shen back into my heart and reclaim that power, and where it comes from. And how this is different from the cultivation work, even though that is also satisfying the need for accomplishing growth on my path.

Nice bit of wisdom to absorb for this hexagram.

26 is a favorite of mine. The massage at line 1-2 goes pretty well, and I manage to navigate the principle of emptiness between heaven and earth with moderate success. I don't feel stiff.

I have a break during line 2, which I planned on cultivating in, but instead a coworker and I exchange lessons in some stance postures. It is just as good if not better. As the work of concentrating insight is done, but there is also an exchange.

In line 3, this time instead of working with an open field, I close my field and work more with what is present and manage to accomplish emptiness between heaven and earth, to a lesser extent than before. My client also doesn't want deep pressure, and finds what I offered to be just perfect. So far all of my clients have been pretty satisfied, even if I feel drained sometimes.

Then I have a return client who came back because my previous deep tissue massage was really good. This person is young and big and strong. With a gentleness, and their tissues are supple seeming. But the stiffness comes out of them in a way that is hard to work with. It wants to go straight to the top of my head and down my spine, which is nothing new, but it makes being empty between heaven and earth very difficult.

During the last half I try a new tactic, using taiji closing energy to close the energy before it can open into me. It seems to work very well at first. But then the energy gets harder to control, and I can tell it is sealing itself around my entire skull.

Client is very happy.

I leave work and am expecting to pick up my housemate from the airport, but plans change and I now need to drive 80 minutes instead of 25 one way.

It ends up putting me back home after traversing lines 4 and 5, right at line 6, where I can see what is really going on tonight and process it.

But... the whole drive there I am feeling that vice clamped around my skull. My energy is much more alert and locked in, like I've had a coffee. But I can also tell how people get tension headaches. It's a lot, and I won't work like this again.

The line 5 drive back from the airport is full of the rain storm that had been building, and there are some spots where it is coming down so hard I need hazards on and have trouble seeing the road. The conversation is good until the end when I need to defend a boundary / judgment, and we do our dance and heal and make up. Still overall making progress, though I'm kinda done being vulnerable when it has only lead to righteous judgements so far. The person likes authentic connection so I open up but I can see they don't really have enough tools to relate to my experiences.

At home with line 6 I see my estranged parent has reached out again, and is pushing for meeting, has already arranged a therapist to see us both and can I confirm which date. Alas, there are good reasons for why I am estranged. Manipulation and gaslighting and not taking no for an answer do not make a good combination in relationships, and this person goes to extremes. Already they have violated my boundaries by moving forward without my consent, by misinterpreting something I said to suit their own needs.

So I re-establish my boundaries and the meaning that I had intended, and remind them that the counseling was for the work they need to do. I make it clear that I'm not negotiating about these things.

Then I reach out to their higher self and explain that I am sorry that things have come to this, and several other things, and invite them to send a message to me through the yi. I don't have any intent for this message, but the answer that comes is 44 line 4. Liu Yiming's description suits the issue exactly, and it is very validating to receive this from their higher self, whom they do not seem interested in working to connect with.

I also reach out to the Queen Mother of the West and ask if they would like to add anything. I receive hexagram 49 lines 1 and 6. Also spot on.

Alas, the decisions we make to feed into conditioning to the point of compulsion, and then face with consequences from those actions. Then try to manipulate our way to positive outcomes. It just cannot end well. Who would think so?

All of this resonates very nicely with line 6.

But in the change of plans with the airport, I missed an ebay auction on some white jade beads. Somewhat fitting for the theme of justice here, especially with the Queen Mother's involvement.

---

Still with a vice around my head I'm not feeling especially tired. (Haven't had caffeine in a month now.)

Even though it is after 1:30. Some big energy today, and my heart is finally being upset and struggling to follow the path.

So I lose the spiritual tortoise and search ebay for another set of white jade beads (that are actually jade). I finally find something that feels good and order it, spending perhaps more than I need to. But I also feel I deserve something to reward my epic efforts tonight. Three separate difficult issues navigated and learned from.

And by 27 line 2 I am asleep.

And awake at line 4, sunrise. A good three hours.

Tarot: Two of Cups. Four of Stones. Nine of Swords.

I write about my encounter with my parent in my support group, still feeling locked in from that tight energy. But it feels good to be accountable for my actions. This is part of my path. And the work I do to navigate and understand these challenging situations can be beneficial for those many who carry similar trauma to my own.

I reward myself with another purchase, a bronze Statue of the Metal Mother, whom I realize why I am working with now. I look up the signs I was requested to, the flowered shang headdress and the belt with numinous tools, to find the right one.

Then for lines 5-6 I go do my work.

Wow. It takes a lot to work free this tightness. Very metal energy. Mental. But it is also developmental. My energy is no longer refined like the past few days, but I am able to empty out. The stiff energy keeps leaving and returning to my field and refines more bit by bit. But I am able to do it.

I make some progress too. The wind is blowing in one stance, but when I do the left side it doesn't. I remember this happening once before, so I go back to the right side and the wind blows again. I take note of what I am doing and repeat it on the left side. The tissues are tighter but I am able to open the posture and the wind responds. I start to understand better how this mechanism works. And I realize how I really need to address my own stiffness along my spine before I can reach the next level of progress in my own work and in my healing work.

For 28 line 1 I meet a friend for a craft fair in town, but it seems that after I stopped cultivating the rain really unleashed. It had been overcast and drizzling, but I had stayed dry for the most part.

But it ends up being a support session for both of us as we sit in the car in town and watch the rain. We realize we are each going through a very similar type of dynamic with people who gaslight us and deny us our voices and reality. It is good to be able to support each other mutually like this, and I am happy to see my friend making progress.

Line 2 involves me replying to the email I saw just before I left with my friend. From my parent. Really I would like to hold the boundary firmly shut here. It is very trying to deal with an emotionally abusive family member. Not very different from a physically abusive one. The actions of both inflict wounds upon the soul. But I am doing my part to ensure they have options to do their work, and if they work within my boundaries I am willing to meet. So I do the work to figure out a potential conclusion and reply again with clear and firm boundaries around what needs to happen, but still allowing for the flexibility instead of just shutting things down. There is a path for them to follow. Using yin to balance yang when it is too excessive, not letting excess go too far.

And now I imagine the ridgepole of line 3 is bending with the weight of this post, though I myself am taking the opportunity to avoid its action by catching up on something (relatively) small and relax a bit. What a relief.

Not quite sure what to do next. Perhaps a little food, and epsom salt bath, and then more cultivation in line 4, to prepare for my lesson tomorrow, and some gentleness to ease the soul. Ah, I have more of the lecture to watch, and sleep soon I hope. Plenty of excesses already. . .

 

[Daeluin]

31, Sensitivity.

My morning goes pretty well, and I can feel a delicate balance to things. Refinement seems easily operated.

The sky is fully overcast, and I notice after cultivating a bit, especially when I am rooting better to my poles, that a bit of blue sky appears overhead, though it doesn't seem to open up anywhere else. I lose my roots a bit and the clouds gather more, and then gain them back and they dissipate a bit again... until it seems the Sun is finally making headway in scattering them a bit wider.

It sort of feels like my airport drive and subsequent emotional issues contributed to this cloud cover, and here I am working to re-order the weather patterns again.

I finally feel a bit more free of the tension from Saturday night.

Though I do still need to traverse more negotiation emails and boundaries. I make it clear my parent and I can schedule a meeting as soon as we complete and sign the agreement and not before, send a PDF of our working agreement, exchange back and forth a bit, and then head off to my lesson and work, and a work meeting.

My lesson is between 31 - 6 and 32 1. Nothing too poignant. The changes to the form I needed to learn before returning to class are satisfying and refined, help things to reach a deeper root. I learn about how the school has evolved in the ~4 years I missed, and am pleased and excited over all. There is clearly a lot more cultivation work in the advanced classes now, which I had long felt was missing. Old students who were too stubborn have left.

And I get some nice answers about my issues with stiffness in massage coming into my field and body. As I was thinking, it seems likely I need to clear my spine to not give it a place to call home. I need to strengthen my core roots above and below. And water! So good for absorbing vibration. Showers after work. Smudging. And I get validation for how I've been working in massage with my roots. They will ask our teacher about what I now realize are a bit more advanced techniques than I am ready for now, that had been shared in the past.

We also connect the healing issues and need for my own clearing, with my familial problems, and there is an acknowledgement of how that bond and the attachments to it (despite my distance) can strongly influence my qi. So I need to do a lot of clearing, and it seems I am moving forward into this internally and externally simultaneously.

Next is a couples massage, rolling right into line 2. Regret disappears. Am able to use deeper pressure with no problems. Doesn't open my bai hui but seems like their vibrations are pretty contained. I also wrap a wet towel around my neck, and it feels good. Go off to enjoy lunch with my coworker before our meeting. They are in acupuncture school and ask me a lot of questions. It is nice to connect and I am able to share some good resources with them.

Line three is our staff meeting. We learn we will be able offer our own services, which is great because we are an incredibly talented group with diverse offerings. My 'spa' is becoming a healing collective of sorts. I suppose the shame comes for all of us when, we stumble over the idea of whether to let couples in couples massages choose their person to work on despite that opening a window for an awkward pause, or to choose for them to avoid it but potenially have an awkward 90 minutes with someone who didn't get a chance to choose. Our boss wasn't feeling well so couldn't be here, but has always been very vocal on the subject in the past in regards to why we allow choice, so it is interesting to see this come up in his absence.

I come home and line 3 is almost over. I see my agreement has been agreed to (I am allowed to record the conversation - and therefor have accountability vs he said she said), and they just want to ensure they get a copy. Great. I setup the contract to be signed online and have the invite email go out.

Now I need to practice what I learned in my lesson, before I forget. But first I am curious what line 4 is about.

Fields, no game. When strength is in the body of action, the time is for doing -- this is like having fields to plow. If one then dwells in a position of weakness, the will inactive, constantly embracing the Tao but unable to put it into practice, that is like empty fields with no game to watch for. This is constancy without any action.

How curious. Well I certainly have something to do.

But I wonder what it looks like when this line changes, for it seems it is not inclined to.

Three leopard cats have trapped a rat,
Feinting left and right they trap it in.
Its time has come,
No path of escape.

Hard not to think of the agreement I just sent off to be signed to a person in the same time zone. Satisfying. Why is a signed agreement even needed? Because when dealing with people who always make up their own rules as they go and whom are not willing to live in a consensual reality, but also whom insist on constantly controlling the reality of others, well... it is a rare occasion. And too I see in this and so much else, how showing up for this sort of timing allows for things to fall into place the way they need to, and prevent those who try to control things from having timing that is as likely to succeed. Which generally doesn't anyway, hence all the conflict and control. But nice to discover an unforeseen ally.

I practice my revised form 7 or 8 times. I'm pretty empty of energy, and it is a form that does a lot of releasing. So I feel pretty cleared, but also a bit depleted, like after a long day in the sun. I mull on how this relates to the hexagram line change.

Come in and try to meditate in line 5, and just fall asleep. Big day tomorrow.

---

I set my alarm for beginning of 34 line 2, so I can feel the energy, but, again sleep before I can taste it much. But I do remember the alert crispness of my dreaming.

Wake in line 3 instead and now I meditate for almost an how, and I do some 8 seated brocades exercises, as I can tell my tissue are stiff. I realize these are good for clearing my spine too.

Get an hour of cultivation in, prepared for work. See I have the agreement signed and let them know I am happy to schedule now, and then off I go. Not feeling deeply connected or anything, but I'm still on the path. Today I have 3 sessions, including a 2 hour and 2 regulars. All three sessions are spread out over 33 lines 5, 6, and 34 line 1.

The first is a stranger and no problems with stiffness. Notably hexagram 33 is all about preventing yin from subduing yang, but subduing yin with yang. Yay full moon energy. And lines 5 and 6 are the mature stages of it, where not much doing is needed. Happy client and for the first time in a while I felt like I gave one of my old massages, more confident and with a hint of energy work.

Second is my brunch friend. This is our third session since they've been back. The first I was full of my teacher's energy, and gave them too much, didn't understand the balance. The second I was rooting to the earth too much and worked very gently, but didn't position myself well enough to allow them to draw much through. This time it is just right. I open up pretty nicely and am also sensitive enough to go slow and not push into the stiffness before the energy comes to meet it. I really start to get what my teacher was talking about. I almost go into a trance a bit, and my client falls asleep a couple times, which is rare for this client. At the end they say 'that was amazing' and tell me about seeing yellow light coming up their center line, and then going away when I grounded them at the end. I remember in that grounding I also felt completely reset and like any stiffness I'd taken on was completely dissolved. It felt like such a complete session. This client even at my last work place has always been a teacher in a way, for I am able to learn so much from my work with them, and we benefit each other's paths so mutually.

Third client is another regular who liked my deep work. But now we're in line 1. To advance far with the strength one has in the feet alone would be to retreat quickly. I can feel that this client cannot pull me through, and I cannot work deeply with them. So I don't. I give my best massage possible with more gentle work, and it is a nice session and they feel good at the end but don't seem interested in chatting much. I'm not wanting to jump to conclusions too much, so just am proud of myself for managing to exercise restraint according to the time. Funny how the timing seems unrelated and yet entirely related. I guess that's how it works.

Before leaving I powow with my manager who tells me to look at the James Webb images that are out. We talk about someone from another work place we knew... and then I go home but stop randomly to grab some prepared food at the health food store, and on my way out see the person we were talking about. I'm able to relieve them of some karma, which seems the whole point. I call up my manager and let them know how amazing that was.

I get home and start recording the lecture videos I need to study in line 3. Going pretty well but is pretty mental. I see the date suggested for meeting and look up the hexagram lines... 50 lines 3 and 4, not particularly good for what I think my parent wants, but they seem to think it is auspicious according to western astrology. Alas.

A few hours in we hit line 3 and I decide to do surgery on my phone to replace the charging port that just arrived in the mail. Too bad I didn't read about line 3 first.

The replacement part came with its own screwdrivers, etc. But poorly made as can be expected. The torx screwdriver bit strips to being ineffective by the ~20th and last screw. So my phone is apart in pieces. And I need a replacement.

I find one on a big box electronics store on their website, and purchase for in store pickup. But when I get there apparently there was an inventory mess up and their warehouse didn't have it either. They offer to sell me one double the cost and I hold out a bit. The guy I'm now working with checks some computers and realizes there was a truck last nigh so maybe it is in the back. Then I see him coming up and checking boxes that need to get unpacked on floor. I wander over while he checks them all. Eventually he's done and goes over to where the product would have been hanging. Sure enough it is right there. Only now they've cancelled my online order and I need to pay again. But when I get home I see the order wasn't really cancelled, and I need to cancel it myself.

A lot of hoops to jump through, but well in line with the line statement: A ram butting the fence gets its horns stuck.

With line 4 the thunderstorm breaks wide open. And there is a LOT of thunder. I get to hear it both outside my window and at the home of my friend through the microphone as I record their video stream. So nice. And very much in line with line 4.

I finish repairing my phone and the charging port works again, yay!

I chat with my other friend who has agreed to meet my parent with me about the date selected, and it works for both of us so I just go ahead and agree to it. Sounds like a pretty unpleasant time for all of us, but I guess that just goes back to the issue of bad timing. Perhaps it is helpful to have a little foresight, but what the lines say is what I thought was going to happen anyway. It probably won't work out all that well. Which is why I'm no contact with them in the first place. So a test. Great.

I write this in lines 5 and 6 I guess, and now I need to pass out. Wow that was pretty great day.

 

[Trojina]

Fields, no game. When strength is in the body of action, the time is for doing -- this is like having fields to plow. If one then dwells in a position of weakness, the will inactive, constantly embracing the Tao but unable to put it into practice, that is like empty fields with no game to watch for. This is constancy without any action.

It's an interesting way to think of 32.4 especially given the usual interpretation of 'there's nothing here for you' rarely fits in my own experience. It's in italics so I assume it's a quote but from who?

 

[Daeluin]

It's an interesting way to think of 32.4 especially given the usual interpretation of 'there's nothing here for you' rarely fits in my own experience. It's in italics so I assume it's a quote but from who?

All of the translation and commentary in this thread are from Cleary/Liming in The Taoist I-Ching, or Forest of Changes. Many of them were attributed and at this point I'll just continue on assuming that is clear for this thread, and make notes if I use other sources, which doesn't seem likely.

It is an interesting line. My interpretation of the experience of it is that there is something to do, but doing it leaves one trapped, so it is hard to move forward without a sense of loss. This is the no game aspect - like going out hunting but coming home with no food, and being more tired than when one set out to boot.

It does not mean that nothing can be accomplished. I was able to accomplish something rather well (learning the lessons thoroughly so I would not forget). But there is a trade-off, or price to pay. In return for my efforts I was pretty depleted of qi and woke up the next day with a charley horse, something that hasn't happened in years.

In my cast it sounds most resonant with the (paraphrasing) "striving for dao but unable to put it into practice". I'm not sure if the This is constancy without any action. is an acurate translation - perhaps action here means something more like consummation.

 

[Daeluin]

So this morning I wake in line 3, still really tired. I try to meditate, but cannot summon the focus.

They say in Chinese Medicine that on the new moon the wei qi (surface level / aura qi, qi in the muscles) is the strongest, and as the full moon waxes the ying qi (nutrative qi the body uses to restore vitality, build blood, circulate through organs etc) grows until culminating at the full moon. The wei qi is just simple and pure, but the ying qi has many types of variances and differentiations. So part of it I feel is that now there is just a lot more going on preventing clarity within, especially as I don't have a strong established stillness practice.

Also the energy is advancing with hexagram 35 today. Inside I feel like advancing. It is hard to stay in place.

My thoughts go to the home I still looking for. And the community of healers I wish to join but am waiting to hear back from. I think I mentioned that I did finally hear back 4 or 5 days ago, and that things were amenable and I could come for a tour. But it was also mentioned that it is more of a temporary living situation, and I asked if that is because people move on before long, or if people are allowed to stay longer if there is resonance? The topic of building a private practice on the land had come up, and it was suggested that such did not exist now but could in the future. I had mentioned that this was all fine, that I did not have a private practice built up yet anyway. But that I would be interested in participating in events... which later felt presumptive of me. So I updated my reply to share that I do a lot of outdoor qi gong that generates a lot of energy. And that I find that people seem to be drawn to this energy, and the places I go to and the businesses that I support cause people to come. So it is important to me that I am able to find a place to do my work where the people who come have a place to land that deeply resonates with the work that I do.

But the other thing is that this group has an intent to help people design their paths forward, each of them offering specific, more yogic centered philosophy on how to design their unique approach to navigating their destiny. Which is interesting to me, because I essentially have been creating my own path for this revolving around daoist tools, like the I Ching astrology, this cycle of monthly i ching hexagrams, dabblings into Evolutionary Astrology, Moon Phase Astrology, and then as well as the spiritual curriculum, navigating the DNA based curriculum as well that involves our traumas and our relationship with the world and deep inner healing that is able to open us up to have the ability to work on some of these larger goals. Part of this work is going from the personal small shapings of who we are and what we want out of life, toward stepping into a more multidimensional aspect of ourselves and our path.

So as I think about this I realize there is a bigger reason I am being drawn to this group. And yet they don't know this about me.

I set up to consult the yi, and write it out in story fashion, and add my intent to share about my own design work in case that helps fill the person in on what I am about, since they have been silent for so long. I am worried that they think I am pushing too far and just don't want anything to do with me.

But before I consult, I look at where I am in the monthly sequence. Right between 35 lines 3 and 4.

I quickly realize that I have no need to cast, for my answer is right in front of me. And oh how clear it is.

Line 3 is where I spent the time focused on writing out my story and reflecting on what is blocking me from moving forward, and wondering if I overstepped with what I had already shared and wondering how what I added and clarified had been taken.

Line 3: The group concurs, regret vanishes. Unable to humble oneself and obey, instead raising oneself to obey, seems to be incorrect and productive of regret; but when one's nature is flexible while one's will is firm, one does not follow yin but follows yang, borrowing the other's illumination to cure one's own ignorance. You go along with the other, and the other goes along with you. Therefore the group concurs in advancing, so where there was regret it can vanish. This is following the illumination of another when one is not illumined oneself.

This makes some sense. Then what of the next part, where I am curious about sharing more? Is that part of the raising oneself to obey, seems to be incorrect?

Line 4: Advancing like a squirrel, even if correct it is dangerous. In the body of light, one has made progress in illumination, but being inside two yins, the light is concealed within darkness, and it also is in correspondence with the first yin; there is illumination, yet it is in some way not impersonal -- false and true are not clearly separated, right and wrong are mixed. If one goes forward in this way, it is like a squirrel, active at night - the vision is not great, the action not far-reaching. Even if illumination is applied properly, after all there is danger. This is illumination that is strong but not entirely impersonal.

I get an immediate recognition that indeed what I have to offer this group is concealed within darkness, and that it is dangerous to proceed. The image of the squirrel trying to rush forward in the dark is spot on.

With this I feel very clear about what to do. At least for now, it seems that perhaps what I offered in 'raising myself up' to this group in terms of the energy I generate and drawing people, might be allowing me to work with them at some level, and we can help each other. I think I will need to wait and see when the right timing is going to invite my sharing of my personal design work. I don't want to walk on their toes and I see that they have the ball beginning to roll with something here, so I want to support and harmonize with it. And my inner energy work on the land and in the area is my first focus. As I told them, everything else falls into place with resonance.

Given the nature of line 4, I choose to go back to bed, for the first time this cycle. I give myself an hour and a half, and have two dreams.

The first dream is observing a chat room of sorts, or radio station, where a member of some sort of daoist community is showing up to reach out to others outside of the community, to reveal some of what their work is like. It seems like people have trouble connecting with this person, so I send a couple of my own replies affirming the wisdom of this person and witnessing the great work they are doing. (I suppose I can see line 4 in this, reaching out into the darkness and for the most part not being heard.)

Then it transitions into another dream, where I am in a cafeteria, I suppose coming back to retrieve a backpack and books I had left where I had been sitting. Only there appears to now be a ceremony set up there with tablecloths and flowers. Is it a wake? But my stuff is still there, covered with cloth napkins but just where I left it. As I come up the family present is very humble and according, and a seemingly strong but autistic young man eagerly greets me and asks me some questions. I don't remember the first ones, but there is a clear resonance between us, and something spiritual about him that perhaps isn't understood by many, but he sees that I see it. In any case, he then asks me, with a bit of build up to show how important it is to him, what are five things I like the most.

I reflect on this, and we go outside to chat, and I say that I don't really know if I am able to answer, because liking things comes from the ego and not my true self. But then I reflect more deeply, and come up with inner peace, observing natural balance.... and then I wake up.

This morning's work has been good for me. So good. For my heart, for my shen (spirit). The family work has been challenging emotionally, and classically it is what causes me to shut down and become focused on my boundaries and where I am not able to support the opening of my heart. Which is a big part of why I can't let it do that any more and why I have gone no contact, and why I am needing to keep most of my focus on moving forward on my path rather than being about this meeting with boundaries.

It is becoming more clear that I have a choice between two versions of myself. The me who wavers and is unable to move forward, pulled back by emotions and childhood trauma I am unable to fully heal from, unable to develop stability on my path, because I continue to allow external influences to derail the progress I make.
Or the me who moves forward with conviction and owns the progress I make, stepping forward bit by bit until I am able to share the gifts I have worked hard with the world. Which are deep gifts related to healing work I can share with people like myself. I don't mean massage, I mean the tools of self-healing and self-discovery, the tools that helps us climb the mountain that take into account our unique gifts and unique path forward.

I see that I am on the verge of being able to step into a community where all of this can unfold for me, or I can allow the malignant parental influence to derail me again. The time is all but set for that parental meeting, and the yi has foretold how it will go. I need not do anything about that.

There is no need to struggle. My lesson in this is to show up and practice equanimity. I will avoid confrontations, will change the subject to light and happy things, I will not abide an agenda but will not try to control what the other wants to do, or get upset when they try to push my buttons and get under my skin, or bemoan how horrible a son I am to their audience. There is no need to worry about any of it. My intent remains to simply meet and share how I am in the moment, the happy things, the sad things - if sharing is allowed that is - and to hear the same from the other. There is no agenda other than meeting with an old friend, and the agreement clearly states that this does not change anything about my being 'no contact' with this person. The boundaries are entirely present to put the things that don't work for us in the light and to help shape a container where we can be lighthearted and pleasant together, without attachments, expectations or judgments put onto the other person. So I will move forward with that intent and will no participate in anything negative. I know full well the other is very capable of being negative all on their own, and so I see this simply becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy for them. Perhaps they will be able to learn from the recording. Perhaps not. It is my gift to therm, if they wish to do their work. If they will not do their work then I wish them well.

And so this is my path through the obstacle and on toward fulfilling my destiny. The obstacle is present because it takes a lot of will to navigate such challenges, and that will is what is requried for me take up the mantle of my power. They say our deepest wound is the source of our greatest power. And my wound is not just from this lifetime - this lifetime's wounds were but necessary for me to tap into who I had become in the past. A warrior of peace.

The warrior's power comes from past trauma. The peace comes from this as well. The warrior of peace does not contend, and therefore no one can contend with them. There is no fighting, for there is no need to take up oppositional perspectives when things can be seen from multiple perspectives to great satisfaction. This is the work of the vishnu granthi, the healing of the knot between the solar plexus and the heart that allows the energy of our aroused power to not invest in attacking and defending, but allow it to be used to navigate upwards and downwards between the heart and the lower dan tien, in this way becoming a source of power regulation.

It seems I have had need to exercise strong will, in the manifestation of clear and strong boundaries, to navigate some of this healing. The parallel to the Ukrainian-Russian war is powerful. For this all began when I confronted the leader of a community in February for their unsafe handling of the community in the name of being a protector. It was then I learned of my mistake. I do not need project my power for it to be effective, and it was not my place to act as a hand of justice in this person's community, despite their running the community for 25 years and thus far not having a single member who has not fled after a year or so. But the 3 hour window of my choice to make a stand that night on the 23rd of February, was the same 3 hour window that Russia first attacked Ukraine. After realizing this the next morning, I knew I had to change and grow from this. I atoned and apologized and took in the perspectives of the others, and after doing this my energy began to move up and down again. Alas, the consequences moved me off my path for a time. And in this I learned the importance of a steady hand and clear boundaries that do not allow things to either escalate, or capitulate. Great power comes of being able to navigate with composure in such situations. Слава Україні! And too in this can be seen the need for careful restraint in maintaining the balance in this global situation. We defend our own without escalating too far beyond standing our ground - we do not become the hand of justice, but allow justice to take its own course. There is great power in this.

I suppose this all is related to line 5: Regret vanishes. Loss or gain, don't worry. It is good to go: Everything will benefit. In the middle of two yangs, having understood one's own nonillumination, and also understood the illumination of others, one borrows strength to cure weakness. Thus where there was originally regret, regret can vanish. Regret come from the mind not being open. If one knows how to empty and open the mind, one can thus seek from others, and so be able to fill the belly. Once one has filled the belly, fortune, misfortune, and stopping at sufficiency are all in the palm of one's hand. One can thereby be free from worry about loss or gain, and go straight ahead without doubt, going ahead in advancing the fire and working, with good results beneficial in every way. This is the illumination of becoming empty to bring on fulfillment.

Ahh, and too, line 6 demonstrates the path of going too far. Advancing the horns; this requires conquering one's domain. There is danger, but it bodes well, so there will be no blame. But even though correct it is humiliating. Adamant strength overcoming oneself, only knowing how to advance illumination but not how to empty illumination, this therefore calls for conquering one's own domain. One's domain means one's personal domain; conquering one's own domain means the work of overcoming oneself. The work of overcoming oneself is emptying the human mind. If one does not empty the mind and relies on adamant strength alone, strength must overcome strength -- there is bound to be danger before gaining good results and becoming blameless. Using illumination in this way, even though one conquers oneself and attains correctness, it is still in the province of striving and does not come about spontaneously, so one does not avoid humiliation before the wise. This is illumination in which one is strong but too proud.

This reminds me of the lessons of hexagram 15 lines 5 and 6. We can think we are correct, but it is so easy to step just a little too far and become humbled before the wise. When the wise are those whom one depends upon (the group I wish to become a part of, the EU and NATO in regards to Ukraine), it seems this navigation can indeed lead to the result of one walking with others or one walking alone. Exquisite balance is ever a fine art.

Speaking of which, next comes hexagram 36. Hexagram 36 line 6 is my parent's I Ching Astrology (he luo li shu) hexagram. This is a more challenging hexagram for me, so I look forward to see how it unfolds and how I may learn from it.

These hexagrams all resonate so well with the energy of the full moon. And with 36 we internalize all the fire and begin to withdraw the yin response - the invitations into conditioning that are not necessary to our path. We preserve our energy so that we may use it where it is most beneficial.

The full moon lands at hexagram 36 lines 1-2 in this particular cycle, though it will always be different. And it is in here that the energy of hexagram's 29 and 30 may be found most potently. For the moon is opposite the sun. Within the moon is the one yang of the sun's fullest light, taken from the sun, leaving it separated from that light. And thus we have water and fire, kan ☵ and li ☲. Here, the earth is in the middle, so the kan of the moon and the kan of the earth are present, and the li of the sun and the li of its energy upon the earth is present, so they are doubled: ䷜䷝.

 

[Daeluin]

Training in line 6 was good. I could understand the dynamic of using too much strength. When strength is used, spirit is disconnected from. However, in this line, today, spirit was abundant, and if I could connect with it, I could cultivate more softly than strongly.

I did use some strength initially, as I was trying to re-train how my hips work using my muscles, strengthening my muscles. But it made me heavier. So over time I used more lightness and connected with spirit more. I wanted to stop several times, but I made it through my silk reeling and tai chi forms, and then needed to be back for plans to finish recording. I think the trouble with moving forward is because just like all the ying qi on the inside, the earth's ying qi is abundant as well, perhaps in the form of a lot of spiritual energy.

Now in line 1 hexagram 36, it becomes more clear what sort of illumination we are concealing. Why we put the fire out. That was all from the previous work, and now we are stopping the operation to allow it to incubate, hidden within, and to avoid damaging it. The damage as well comes from the human mentality, so it is best to avoid getting mixed up in mundane affairs, which are likely to be abundant with all the energy out there.

So a good time for some stillness practice and... gosh I guess a trip into nature would be good. Nice relaxing day observing nature by a mountain stream.

Alas, I need to finish recording these videos. But, I can simply do the recording. I don't have to open my mind to them, don't have to fill it up.

 

[Daeluin]

Welp, the "human mentality" sure has been active. Starting with how it began to be hard to focus the past two days, and then with hexagram 36.... I can tell I'm trying to do too much, and it is affecting my ability to have the time for stillness and movement practice, which is needed more than ever during this 'fullness'.

Beginning of line 1, I go to get lunch, after doing a couple castings about something that I've been reflecting on related to weapons. But the answers confuse me.

Then I meet my friend online to finish recording the videos, and we only need a few bits and pieces, so it doesn't take long. End of line 1 ... straight off I get a call from my landlord about the oil marks on the street. He is thankful I am not parking in the driveway, but the neighbor complained to him about the oil spot and where I park.

It is more than fair. I have been putting a pan to collect it lately, but the spot remains.

So up till nearly sunset I work on the video editing. And then before line 3 is over I get baking soda from the grocers and scrub the oil up a bit. I figure this is another way of withdrawing, though I don't know how well it will work. I also park my car back further.

After sunset, with line 4 in operation, the human mentality really wants to come forth. It's the 'scrolling facebook' mentality.

I study my yi readings more, and gain more insight, but still confused. I do another reading for clarification on something, but I get 4 lines active and I'm not sure... I think I'm not asking very good questions. I go to bed.

---

37 is pretty OK. I've been encoding the videos now, and the plan for them is coming together. I need to get another tool to cut part of the beginning off where the cropping isn't taking effect correctly, and that works well. Liu Yiming talks a lot about balancing firmness and flexibility for this one, so makes sense.

I share some information online, but it isn't taken well so I take it down and ask clarifying questions. It is for a sensitive community so I understand. I also note that I seem to be overstepping the balance of things.

Cultivation in the rest of line 5 is excellent. I go a little faster to save time, but my hips and lower back are finally getting into the alignment I've been looking for, and I'm getting more comfortable with dropping my lower back naturally. By the end of the session I'm feeling like I've replenished a bit of jing/vitality.

Today is my painting day. 38 line 1 is where I spend the time sanding the spackle, washing, gathering stuff in the middle of the room so all walls are exposed, and taping up all the edges. Regret disappears. When you lose the horse, don't chase it -- it will return on its own. Seeing an evil person, there is no blame. I wasn't sure about this hexagram for this task, but it's my only timing. And line 1 at least resonated with feeling like regret disappears. It felt good to do this work and there were no impediments.

Then I want lunch, so at the beginning of line 2 I drive over to the place I like to go, and while I'm in line I look at my phone. Oh, wow, I just got a text - my phone was so low volume I couldn't hear, and I had pulled it out to look up the hexagrams while I waited, but then saw I had a text from 1 minute ago.

It is my friend asking if I can take them to an appointment that begins shortly, sorry for the short notice, they lost access to their car. Pretty odd synchronicity. I have exactly enough time to take 10 minutes to eat, 10 minutes to go get them, and 15 minutes to get them to their appointment.

It delays my project but that's OK. The timing works out great and I drop them off 2 minutes late, which is pretty good considering the short notice. And also that I've learned to put boundaries around not dropping everything I'm doing for someone - I took care of my needs to eat first, even if I did wolf it down. Because it can all work out I don't stress and just enjoy the experience and don't worry about the rest. There is some clear syncrhonicity with the timing so let's see what happens.

I need to wait 40 minutes for my friend, so I wander over to the shops... I was going to get vegan ice cream, but then decided against all the sugar, and went into the... metaphysical / witchcraft shop instead. I wander around a bit and see some tarot decks, and spend a bit of time looking at them. The Arthurian tarot I've been using for some time is lovely, but I've misplaced the booklet and have been reading from Tarot 101 instead... perhaps I'm here to get a new deck.

I all but give up, but then one spots my eye - called the "Linestrider" deck, which certainly fits with what I've been doing. It seems to be about walking a balanced path between dimensions, and I like the sound of that and the art.

Then a lady walks up and lets me know that she is the tarot reader and to let her know if I would like any help regarding the deck. I let her know that my path lead me here, and I'm not quite sure why, maybe I need a reading? She tells me her prices. I tell her I'll think about it. I'm trying not to rush into it but to see if it feels right. I buy my new deck and see that there is a flyer about her work next to the cash register, and I realize I could use some guidance on finding my next living situation.

So I go back for a 15 minute reading, and it is pretty great. It validates a lot of what I've been doing - focusing on my inner growth rather than externally seeking, but she suggests that several communities will be opening up to me in the next couple of weeks, and that my inner work is bearing fruit. And some other stuff.

Right at the end my phone rings and I wander out to find my friend done with their appointment next door and walking right up, guessing I was getting a reading. They look for a tarot deck as well, and I set my things down to open up my new deck. Then they're done and ready to go, we leave.

After dropping my friend off I realize I left my water bottle back at the shop, so I go back and get it. Curious why I've been drawn back, I look around the shop again and find they have some purification sprays and sage, so great, more tools for helping with the energy I've been taking on in my massages. I was recommended to do sage smudging after work as well.

I finally get back to my paint job and look up the line statements for lines 2 and 3. Oh.

Line 2: Meeting the master in an alley, there is no blame.
Hah. Wilhelm has "narrow street", but with both I see that there is a chance encounter that is easy to stumble upon if one allows circumstances to guide one.

Line 3 started right when I dropped my friend off. One sees the vehicle dragged back, the ox halted; the person's hair and nose are cut off. There is no beginning, but there is an end.

Hah.... the vehicle dragged back indeed. I suppose even back when there were wagons people would forget things and need to turn back around. I swear I hadn't looked at these lines before hand.

Despite this impasse, I start painting with no problems and get about half of it done by the end of line 3, and feel it is time to go home. Need a ladder for the rest anyway, and time for things to dry out.

I come home and line 4 is active. Disharmony in solitude; meeting good people, associate sincerely, and though it be trying, there will be no fault.

I check facebook to see if I have any messages, but nope. Instead I see that the community I've been looking for an invite to tour has posted a new ad looking for people, so maybe I turned them off after all. I feel a pang of regret, but I can also tell that the human mentality is active and allow it to pass and am thankful for the reading earlier. For it is helping me to realign with my own path and call out to what is right for me, whatever that might be.

I suppose y'all are the good people I am associating sincerely with.

I realized that showing my tiny house to a potential buyer on Sunday will occur during what looks like hexagram 44 line 2. Meeting, for the purposes of making a major acquisition, does seem appropriate. I guess we'll see if they like it. It is not advantageous to be the visitor. I wonder if that means there will be temptation. We shall see.

 

[Daeluin]

39, Halting/Trouble/Obstruction

So I wake up at 5 before my alarm, feeling refreshed. I meditate a bit, then explore the new tarot deck, not sure what I think yet. Despite the mysterious intention, the booklet follows quite a worldly path so far. The Arthurian is much more mysterious.

My white nephrite jade necklace arrived last night, so in line 3 I finally get it clasped and go out to cultivate. Going leads to trouble, come back. Well, cultivation is a return after all. And with the white jade around my neck I feel suddenly quite aware of my own stiffness, which is being called out to be purified. That is basically how this session goes. By the end I feel pretty heavy, but also more deeply cleared if that makes sense. I fully tune into the metal associations with grief and acceptance, and the heavy comprehension that purification requires loss.

Good session, a little overwhelmed, not connecting to roots but both heavier and lighter now. I can't really tell if the jade is turning my qi into metal or bring up my own metal to be processed. Time will tell, can't get this thing off easily. Hah, my own version of Sun Wu Kong's circlet.

Coming in shortly after line 5 starts, check facebook. I see that the person I've been communicating with about the community situation is online. I compose and send a new message.

Great trouble; a companion comes. Yang is fallen into yin, the mind of Tao is covered by the human mind -- this is called great trouble. However, if strength is balanced correctly, when one uses the human mind temporarily to cultivate the mind of Tao, once the mind of Tao comes, the human mind is transformed: Strength and flexibility combine, and the primordial energy congeals from nothingness to form the elixir. So in great trouble, one is capable of a great soluti9on. This is strength and flexibility being one energy, with no trouble.

My message asks if it is possible to tour sometime within the next two weeks. Then I say that the resonance the I Ching told me about was in regards to withdrawing to do deep spiritual work, and explain that I had hoped I would be able to share mutually, explain briefly about the karmic design I follow based on the daoist tradition, interest in reconnecting to land, laughter, and service. And explain some of the heaviness I've been going through in relation to my parental situation, as well as working on selling my tiny house, so I may do the work to let go of what is not serving and prepare for what is next.

Then I do some deep full body breathing work using my arms and legs, expanding and contracting to the lower dan tien. It is actually very good at refining this dense metal energy. And some circle walking. I feel lighter, a little.

I slip on an amber necklace to help some wood balance the metal, and go off to work on my tiny house. On the way out the door my neighbor is outside so I apologize about the oil and they thank me for saying something, and mention something about having a pressure washer, and I mention something about making cookies.

On the way I stop to eat quickly, and check out the bazi - oh. We're in a Xin hour, yin metal celestial stem. Meaning before was a yang metal celestial stem. In addition to the metal necklace, I was cultivating through metal energy. No wonder there was so much heaviness.

At my tiny house I'm able to get my loft ladder screwed back in, sand down the now patched salt-lamp spot, bring a ladder down from the main house, and get things taped up for the upper part of the pain job.

Only I forgot to bring the paint tray, roller, and brush with me from home where I had cleaned them last night.

It is just hitting line 6. Going is trouble, coming is great. For good results, it is beneficial to see a great person.

I walk back to my car, but see I'm blocked in. The children are getting picked up for an adventure. I bring up a tool I was using and return it to the basement, and walk back.... now there is a fire truck blocking the way. Only momentarily it seems, as it just uses our driveway to make a 3 point turn and heads back the other way. The children are off, I'm unblocked, and I chat with my long time friend who owns the house my tiny house is on for a bit. Catch them up on the plans to show the tiny house and meet with my parent this week.

Then I come back, do some quick cleaning, etc, and check fb - oh, I have a message, and I am now being asked how soon I can move, and when is the soonest I can come out for a tour. I guess the tiny house I saw listed is a possibility for me. It is similar to my old tiny house, but slightly bigger. I think this could actually work for me.

I reply and let them know my available times and wait - they're offline now.

I see now this is likely why my tarot reading yesterday advised I try to make arrangements to visit within a certain time frame.

The past two hexagrams seem to have involved a bit of dancing. Things are seemingly out of place and misaligned, and require a certain operation. But perhaps if we are able to be in the right places at the right times, things can work out?

Or perhaps my going and missing the reply message means a delay that leads to a missed opportunity. We shall see!

I note that I have a 2.5 hour massage scheduled with a new client I know nothing about, for the duration of hexagram 40 line 2.

Catching three foxes on a hunt, having golden arrows, correctness brings good fortune. With one yang between two yins, one is firm yet can be flexible. Precise and singleminded, keeping to the center, one doesn't let the human mind do evil, like catching foxes in the fields and not letting the foxes run wild; yet neither does one seek forced extinction of the human mind, like having golden arrows and not hurting the foxes. Not indulging, not injuring, going along with its desires to gradually guide it, one causes it to naturally dissolve, so one is liberated without trying to be liberated. This is the most fortunate liberation. This is being strong and using flexibility to be released from danger.

Curious. Sounds like more work to learn from. Working with the energy and not fighting to change it, but not letting it run wild either, using 'golden arrows' to dissolve it. Golden arrows seems like the energy from the top of my head, but also from the third eye.

I'll get to learn more about how this necklace works too.

Ah, out of my shower I see there are plans being made to see if meeting up tomorrow morning will work between all of us. "Trouble" - what an odd hexagram for things to move forward in. And yet despite that, I guess this is the magic to be found within trouble.

 

[Daeluin]

Hexagram 40 line 1 was uneventful, and I realized that my long massage actually had an hour in this window. This was the most active window for my working through the top of my head with this client, who was clearly energy aware and trauma aware. After the first hour not much changed, at least for me. At the end they were very pleased, and incredibly relaxed. They were also interested in qi gong and at a place in their path where they felt they wanted to learn more, so I directed them to the school I am returning to, at the end of the block. Then they rebooked for another 2.5 hour in two weeks.

I felt really really content with how this unfolded. Somehow I am starting to draw in the clients who want the work I do, and are the clients who need the work I do, and I am also able to help them find the school, which has always been hidden in plain sight. To me this is evidence that my path is merging with something bigger, and that is a major step along the way of achieving the work that the opening reading this thread speaks about.

I wander off to get some food, and look to see what line 3 is about... Riding bearing a burden causes enemies to arrive. Even being righteous one is humiliated. It is a busy day downtown, lots of events, lots of tourists. I take down my topknot and tie my hair behind so I don't stand out and attract unwanted attention.

I get home and see I have a time slot for visiting the community tomorrow between 10-12, so hexagram 41 lines 5 and 6. I read these and see they are very auspicious. But who knows, it may just be me walking my path.

I replied that this time is great (before I read about it), and I pretty much know how to get there, though I've never been given directions. I think about asking if I just go straight at the bend (because that's what it looks like), but consider the hexagram line, and figure that presuming nothing and being patient is the right call here. Allow the time to be confirmed and directions to be proferred, for the true invitation to arrive.

My usb drives arrived so I can set those up with the videos I recorded, which I said I'd turn over to my coworker tomorrow. There were several of us sharing the class, so I thought I would make several copies on usb drives and give them as gifts. To make them more memorable I thought of adding several beads to them.

The tasks are all starting to find their way to completion now, it feels good.

 

[Daeluin]

The proper invitation arrived soon after. And I to bed I went.

A lovely morning routine, early. Misty. The past two days have felt more nourishing, are a recovering from the full moon's fire and danger. Connecting with roots a little more. In sitting comes giving and recieving with arms and palms out, and I feel the equal exchange of energy for emptiness, a different kind of energy. Instead of just giving, I allow myself to become full in mutual exchange.

Clean out my car, long over due.

A lot of this seems resonant with the correcting and curing of the last three lines of this hexagram. Reduction that leads to the medicine. Liu Yiming speaks elusively of the southwest, where there mystery may be discovered for those who blend innocence and emptiness and stillness.

I'm not there yet, and have my own mysterious to uncover.

The drive is pleasant. Lots of misty mountains and valleys and lush summer forests. I arrive 10 minutes early and connect with the earth before wandering toward the main house.

There are flowers blossoming all around. Everything feels clean and in order.

I meet my hosts and the journey commences. . .

The tiny house is an upgrade for me - more space. And is in a very commanding feng shui placement on the land. The land is full of spring fed water ways and creeks and grassy spots to do taijiquan, and fruit trees and everything I love.

I am welcomed by all, cooked lunch, conversed with in ways that only serve to reveal further resonance, and it is all everything I've ever wanted.

But there are sacrifices of course. To be here I need to remain in alignment with how my path has unfolded. I leave behind the coping mechanisms of the past for good. I leave behind the need to watch tv shows or dilly dally in anything other than my path forward. Which I have too much to focus on anyway, between chinese medicine, the i ching, taijiquan, my stone work. And now land and community to contribute toward.

We go over the agreements and I need to leave for work. It appears as though I am welcomed for moving forward, and yet we have not signed anything, so I shall need to come again. We have laid out the potential plan of easing myself into this space over the next two weeks, allowing for a gradual transition for all.

Then I'm off for work. Haven't had time to look at 42 yet, but essentially I am landing for a 2 hour couples massage mid-line 1, and into line 2. I've worked with them before but don't remember. It is more deep work requested, but there is openness to the way I work, and at the end the person asks to hug me. I managed OK with the stiff energy, only the white jade and a wet towel around my neck this time, no amber. They said that even though it wasn't deep they could feel things being worked out. I wonder if I try so hard to make up for the lack of physically deep work that I do more than I really need to. The stiffness is mostly settling around my head now, and I think it goes there because I how much I'm trying to draw from the top of my head. I can do better at that once I strengthen my core channel.

I stop by a crystal shop on my way out and see they have some good discounts on a couple of large quartz. Then I realize I don't have my debit card... oh, I left it at the place I grabbed dinner last night during that that line that warned about loss. Hah. I go back, they have it for me. I realize I forgot a crystal under my massage table, eat dinner, go back, get the crystal, go home.

Reading through the rest of the agreement, I am humbled that my path has lead me here, and that I have been able to follow it true, to this point at least. This all began when I left my own tiny home in January I now realize, as that is when the idea for the next one began to become manifest. I needed to embark on this journey. Needed to become aware of the community first (just a few people really, with good hearts and a vision) in February, so I could learn the lessons I needed to first here, while this space started to become available. In a way I called it in, but had to change to find my way there.

And I am changing still.

 

[Daeluin]

43 - Cultivation was very good. I began focusing more on breathing very deeply into my lower abdomen. Creating pressure there and a storage place for the energy, and it went very well. It felt like I was re-claiming my own abdomen. And as I progressed with the work, the hip and lower back work I have been doing felt very much tied in together with supporting the pressure within the lower abdominal tissues.

I went through the full routine again, and started around the beginning of line 4, right after sunrise. This line doesn't seem to make progress, and I suppose that was true in some sense. I was not as meditative as usual, and was approaching things differently. The power of it however did allow me to make progress.

When walking back I first thought of the hexagram I was in, and the work I did seemed to make sense. Now reading the line I can consider it more, and see that it was another step back to prepare the foundation for moving forward, but not fully moving forward on its own.

For line 5 I met my friend who is coming to meet with my parent on Wednesday. I treated them to brunch and we had to go to 2 different places before we found a non-crowded spot. Somehow there are more tourists here this weekend than ever before.

It was a good discussion, getting on the same page about my boundary agreement with my parent and the reasons for the boundaries. My friend was very supportive, and compassionate, having their own trauma come from similar situations. I'm glad that we can support each other with strength in this mutual way. The GB road trip seems like forever ago to me now. But to my friend it just feels like a week ago. I guess that's fair. Who navigates like I am now without getting stressed out and needing down time?

In line 6 we adjourn, but we carpooled, so I invite them over to see my tiny house before I finish painting it. I also notice that both before we leave, and on the way back, that my friend spots some fliers about events happening now, and is interested. I only mention it because of the line. In my experience it draws us into things that we don't need to do. It seems more productive to enjoy the moment than try to get stuff done just yet, so I just allow life to unfold.

At home (to change into painting clothes) I see I have a response, and that I am accepted officially into the community, and may consider my cabin reserved. We still haven't signed anything yet, but I feel so much gratitude. And so humbled and blessed. I say so in return, and start to make some plans for going there, say Tuesday afternoon... (hmm... that'd be 48 - ah, lovely).

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Now it is changing into line 1 of hexagram 44. Just like 23 and 24, these two (43 and 44) seem two have that dual operation where they meet. It is the same opperation in some sense, but as one transitions to the next, the reason for that operation changes. One is to complete, the other is to preserve completion.

Impulsively perhaps, I get excited about the line and think to inform my housemate and landlord. I'm a little nervous, as our verbal agreement all along has been that I may leave without paying for August (I was even given July to potentially help finding a new tenant easier), but having until September 1st.

Dropping the news now would indeed activate line 1. I write the email, but I hesitate, uncertain.

So I consult the yi. 40 line 4 and 6. Liberation. I get from these line activations that the time to release the arrow is not when one first spies the target, but after one has had time and clarity to ensure one's aim is true.

I delete the email and wait to see what is next. It would be good to have the paperwork in order and payment made first, before I commit to giving up August.

I do happen to get a reply email from my housemate during this time (about something else) and it is positive, and connecting, and I am able to connect back with positivity. I am glad I chose to wait.

All this time I've been continuing to send awareness into my lower abdomen to maintain a semblance of pressure there, and to work it with my breathing to help self-regulate the five phases. I realize developing this is key.

Well, I chose to update this now in line 1, because moving forward and activating line 1 stuff doesn't seem super wise. It limits my time on painting, but I think things will work out how they are meant to in the end. Technically I still have an hour left of it though, gosh these summer hours are long. So I'm headed off to do the work. I need to do some cleanup in the yard still, perhaps that is a good line 1 task. I did some cleanup in my room last night as well, felt very good.

On to the next!

Edit - oh. It's pouring rain now. So after that.

Edit 2 - it looks like it will go on for a while, at least until the meet. So time to go paint. I'll just work on reversing the operation of this line and holding things together. The meet may get cancelled, but I won't invite it to be. The scheduled meet is now squarely in line 3 as well. I'm not trying to game for advantage here, just trying to operate in the flow without upsetting the balance. So we'll see what is intended to unfold!

 

[Daeluin]

I ended up just getting straight to the painting. After driving over through the pouring rain, even hydroplaning a couple times.

Got some nice work done, and then I hear a notification noise from my phone right around the time the rain seems to be letting up. I know that line 2 has activated, and am guessing it is my appointment being cancelled. Yup! Even as it just stopped raining here, it started raining there, so we rescheduled for hexagram 49 line 5, which sound pretty nice. (They suggested Wednesday, I said I had something in the evening, so perhaps morning? And they set the time.) Seems like things are converging on Wednesday. Especially if I give my notice then too, assuming I might be able to sign paperwork on Tuesday night, when I'm planning on revisiting my new land.

Line two goes well... finish all of the upstairs painting and start on the second color. I'll need to come back tomorrow and finish. Really I don't know what I was going to do if they had decided to meet tonight. It is nice out now too. Thank you universe.

Three. Interesting line. I start exchanging texts with my friend, who invites me out hiking. Nope. Painting. And I do. And I finish up what I'd planned for tonight and head over to get some dinner. (I really wish I had more time to cook at home.) I end up eating a bit more than I realized I was hungry for, which is great. I don't feel quite overfull, all that lower abdomen work might've summoned up an appetite I think.

But all around me things are crazy. The staff where I am are clearly drunk and high. Shouting improvised slogans to the tune of Y.M.C.A. to keep themselves going as more and more people surge in. Busy weekend. And fire trucks drive by twice, 15 minutes apart. I'm scrolling reddit and seeing all kinds of stuff going on in the world. Seems 44 all right.

Off for home just after sunset. Pretty sky. Shower. Now laundry and more training. Not gonna let these hexagrams derail my work!

Though I'm wondering how I am going to have time to finish up this online continuing education course I have a good 20 hours of videos to watch before I lose access in two weeks. Maybe I can squeeze an hour in tonight.