HElp with 60 relating 27

[lilylotus]

I love somebody that I have felt for years he is my soul mate, he had serious problems , we never were able to relate because he runs away when we get together and he realizes he feels love. I am a balanced person but got completely lost with this, I cant get him out of my mind and less from my heart, and he cant get close to me. We tried to get closer some months ago, just because I was living his city to be thousand miles away from where he lives, but then he felt he was losing me and tried to get close to me , he wrote me that he loves me but as soon as he said it, he realized he was feeling love and run away again. Everybody tells me, I deserve a better person, i have to find other person, needs to fullfill etc..but I am not a machine, i cant just erase that man from my heart, specially because I know that whatever he does he does it because he is emotionally sick..I also cant be his nurse..I would like to be a friend because I am far away and would be possible to connect by email and talk sometimes , without expectations..but last time I was so upset with him that I was really offensive even if what I told him was true, I told him with very bad thousand words..he does not write or answer my emails or calls, but I feel him, and I just dont know what to do..I think all time about him..when I work, walk all time..I know he is sick, but we dont stop loving somebody because he is sick. I ask " where is going this love. situation between him and me" and I got 60 related 27 not changing lines..can somebody please help me? tks:bag:

 

[em ching]

hi lilylotus,

I can relate to your expression of wasted feelings here.
It seems a limit has been set. He or his issues are depriving you of basic nourishment which is not fair to you. I think it is a shame when you clearly just want to be his friend - but he may realise deep down he should give you more than that. But at the moment, he cannot.

60.2 suggests to me (as you have been the one being sincere and open in your approach to him) that he has made a mistake in his hesitation : 'anxious hesitation brings disaster'.
So maybe he wants to come closer to you but he's sabotaging himself. Or maybe he's just being selfish - because he knows you care about him and so is being lazy. I don't know that may be too personal as I don't know him or you.

60.5 suggsests it is a good thing to retreat when the situation demands it. As it would bring rewards in the future. So try and distract yourself with your own interests - despite him always being in your mind. I know you can't block him - but be strong and Don't act on your emotions.

60.6 also reiterates that though imposing hesitation on yourself is hard - it must be endured for a good result: 'In such situtations (where action is not possible) ruthlessness towards oneself is the only way of saving one's soul, which would otherwise succumb to irresolution and temptation'.

So I think you need to be strict with yourself and try and find nourishment from another source - not him. Just believe there are other things out there that can bring comfort - such as getting absorbed in a book or film, going shopping, friends. I know it's hard, but you cannot go on being starved by him. You need to look for other sources of nourishment.

If you limit how much attention you pay to him - perhaps he will realise.
Look after yourself and hold on
I hope your feelings get easier.

:bows:

 

[lilylotus]

That was lovely thanks! in fact he said many times " I am my worst enemy", I guess I am acting as my worst enemy also and if I would not know how emotionally stable I am I would think I am obsessed. I do many other things, I moved many thousands miles away from where he is, still he does not move away from my mind and heart. Yes, I have to retreat. Do you think I can keep asking to the iching? Or should I also stop doing that? I feel so extremely sad and I do not understand the why I feel so much. Thank you really much!

 

[willowfox]

I ask " where is going this love. situation between him and me" and I got 60.2,5,6 related 27

Unfortunately, either you or him, or both of you have hesitated and messed around for far too long, and now the opportunity seems to have passed both of you. It suggests that you demanded too much from him and failed to restrain your own desires, and that led to the email which totally upset him.
Hex 60 is about limitations and you are guilty of being too pushy, him and you being too hesitant, and then you trying to force him to do something and of course you pushed him even further away.

Hex 27 advises you to becareful in how you talk with him as words can bite. Plus this man needs care and looking after which you failed to do as you said that you have no wish to be his nursemaid.

So, the end.

 

[lilylotus]

I feel with your words that there is something you directly feel relating to you? I am sorry it is just a matter of intuition. I guided my life always with feeling and interpreting the words tru what I feel.
Yes, I think I pushed too much, but he behaved as terrible as to make me explode. I said I cant be his nurse because I believe we must give a shoulder but we should not fish for the person. I was there for him all time, but I can not solve his inner problems I can show the way I live and hold his hand but if he bite my hand one after other time he cant expect not receiving a desperate clap in his face. I care about him very much, I wish I could care more, I just know I can not offer to him to solve his problems, nobody can solve the inner problems of others and less if that means that person will toy with your feelings. An unending game because he does not stop and confront himself. And I am not proud of my words, but his actions were much over what I said.

 

[lilylotus]

32 and 46

Willowfox, I asked again , what does he feel for me, what is in his heart for me?

And I got this answer: 32 the 3rd line undivided ins in red, and relating hexagram 46 ,
What do you think? Would you please give me your insight? Tks And I love him.

I ask " where is going this love. situation between him and me" and I got 60.2,5,6 related 27

Unfortunately, either you or him, or both of you have hesitated and messed around for far too long, and now the opportunity seems to have passed both of you. It suggests that you demanded too much from him and failed to restrain your own desires, and that led to the email which totally upset him.
Hex 60 is about limitations and you are guilty of being too pushy, him and you being too hesitant, and then you trying to force him to do something and of course you pushed him even further away.

Hex 27 advises you to becareful in how you talk with him as words can bite. Plus this man needs care and looking after which you failed to do as you said that you have no wish to be his nursemaid.

So, the end.

 

[em ching]

Do you mean 32 line 4 to 46? Or line 3 to 40?