Hexagram 22 to 27. Relationship

[Wisteria Breeze]

Hello, I am a newbie here, so I apologise for my possible silly questions and my bad English. I have a friend and I fell in love with him about 5 months ago. I was too shy to tell him about it, but 2 months ago I understood that I couldn't take it anymore, so I confessed to him. He kindly rejected me, he just ended up quite painful semi-virtual and long-distance relationship with a girl, that's why he was not ready for starting it over again) Unfortunately, we had a quarrel a month after that. I was so frustrated that I decided to stop any close communication with him and he was not very happy about that. We are still communicate like half strangers and it is slowly tearing me apart. Today I asked I-ching whether he loves (as a girl, not a friend) me or not. I've got hex 22 to 27. I always find hex 22 a bit confusing, I don't know, maybe the interpretation is that I am trying to convince myself that he feels something more about me than a friendly favour, but it's wrong and he doesn't love me at all (again, in a romantic way). I also have no idea how to understand hex 27 in this case. Moreover, I asked how I should behave towards him and got 42 unchanging. As far as I understood, I should forget my grievances and maintain relationship as nothing happened. I also interpret it as together we should put into life all the ideas and projects we came up with. Could you please help me with interpretation and tell me whether my understanding was right or wrong?

 

[chingching]

From grace to hunger

22 > 27

This reading presents so many layers for interpretation, especially given the context you've described, which is a love epidemic these days with reality going ever more virtual, on top of a reality which is augmented to begin with. We're already dreaming through the day and the night, now during the day we filter the dream with screens, goggles and gloves and I don't even know anymore with what else. Too bad for nerve endings and capillaries lower then the head. (or maybe not )

How you'll end up seeing your reading, what it really means for you will depend on your innate wisdom and body wisdom, but it sounds very much that this person is not of their body, at least not as much as he could be. So how can your body know? Let's face it, if not used in balance i ching and other divination can be just as a detachment as can VR games or online only romance. So his having a virtual and long distance relationship could echo your own manifestation of virtual and long distant, because you have loved him alone for 5 months. Then, as he has had his virtual relationship changed, you bravely spoke your truth to him and changed yours. And then you consulted the book of changes to guess his internal reality. Maybe we could look at this reading and see a different question preceding it, as the past circumstances of you both are in part a mirror, so why wouldn't the present be a mirror as well?

Mirrors are reflections, to reflect what you otherwise cannot see. What would the number 2 know of itself if it never saw another number 2. Hexagram 22 is the mountain lit by a campfire, made pretty by the dance of light's effect. It gives the mountain decoration and the fire a magic to give it. But to fall in love with the way the light effects the mountain is like falling in love with the twinkle from a star, fleeting and so far away that you'll never touch it. You can touch a mountain, feel its hard surface, try climbing to its top. Some mountains are unforgiving, some easier. Better to judge which by daylight than by the trick of a campfire's flicker.

Even better to judge it by touch, by smell, by the way someone's body feels just before any part touches but is close enough to do so. It's in the almost touching the greatest hunger can stir. You'll never know how hungry you can get until you've tasted denial as well. Will you two stay staring at the flicker, which enchants and distracts. Talking can certainly keep you there. Maybe that's all that makes you see a white knight. Maybe its what's keeping you safe, maybe behind the maya of love, projection and hormones your psyche knows that he is only as good as the mirage and the mountain behind it, not worth your time to spend climbing it. Or maybe his faults and inevitable human-ness are worth the investment. Maybe 22 > 27 is just a picture of the corners of your mouth only moved by a superficial view of this person. But maybe the superficial actually baits your hunger, or then again, maybe yi is saying it takes more than beauty to move humans together, more than images, screens, filters and the virtual. From the perspective of the eyes it takes so much more. From the perspective of the body whose skin, nerve endings, nose, ears and tongue wait to be aroused; a whole lot less.

Just being close enough for someone to smell you can effect them into response. So much can be achieved to attract someone by just thinking, without filter or fear, 'damn, you look hot'. So much more from a finger's light touch that asks for reciprocation.

Deep hunger does not know beauty. It makes fat drip down the corners of the mouth when finally able to eat the succulent after a long wait. It's all the mess of hair and clothes and snot from your nose, all the smell of human bodies cast aside from focus for pleasure to arrive after a long desire. Where want and need finally get what they've been after.

After hunger gets the nourishment it wants it knows the taste. You can walk away from the light cast on a mountain, you can even walk clear through it. But once you know the taste of someone, your body locks it into every cell and even if you try very hard to resist, it'll want it again, and it'll ask for more.

You are actually in the most privileged position. Even though it sounds like you've emotionally attached to him already and are experiencing the pain of separation, you get to look into the mirror. The number 2 gets to know its own shape in 22, through a mirage, a trick to the senses. After that you can know if your eyes have simply placed a flicker of a white horse over him like a convincing movie projection. Or if, for each other, you could be the real thing. If the corners of the mouth hinge teeth and lips around the virtual, hunger will stay very, very, very unsatisfied.

Hope that opens up how you look at your reading, and helps deepen the enquiry and understanding. I could write more. But like I said before, the answer, always, is inside of you.

You have my respect and love for travelling the hard, confusing yet irresistible journey of romance and relationships :bows:

Chingching



3sixtee.photo / A view for each degree of the zodiac

 

[Wisteria Breeze]

Hello, chingching, thank you so much for your response. It makes me carefully think about my feelings and what relationship I have right now in general. I cannot claim that everything becomes clear, but it helps me a lot. Thanks again for your response)

 

[Trojina]

chingching I have to say, thanks button isn't enough, how brilliant your post was. Beautifully written too and you bought so much out of the reading. It's certainly one I'll be returning to.

I did notice you mentioned the white horse...another amazingly rich paragraph

You are actually in the most privileged position. Even though it sounds like you've emotionally attached to him already and are experiencing the pain of separation, you get to look into the mirror. The number 2 gets to know its own shape in 22, through a mirage, a trick to the senses. After that you can know if your eyes have simply placed a flicker of a white horse over him like a convincing movie projection. Or if, for each other, you could be the real thing. If the corners of the mouth hinge teeth and lips around the virtual, hunger will stay very, very, very unsatisfied.

...and just wondered if you were referring directly to line 4 as it is 22.3 that changes to 27.


... just wondered if you had thought it was line 4 not 3 ? Not that it makes any difference as I can't actually imagine a better response than the one you have written and placing a 'flicker of a white horse over him' is just...well perfect.

 

[chingching]

Trojina! Oh my goodness yes! I don't know why I got that confused. I suppose lol ne 3 can lend itself to the same phenomena of falling for appearances as well. In modern terms I guess line 3 makes me think of having to refresh the browser page, or update the program on the virtual girl. What are your thoughts? ( and thank you for your kind words!!! Xxx)

 

[Trojina]

I don't have much to add to what you said. I can't say I wholly understand line 3 but in general I'd say it was to do with finding a way to value that 'carried away' feeling without getting swept down river by it and hitting rocks or hunger. I think hunger is a big part of the reading just as you described.

I have a friend and I fell in love with him about 5 months ago. I was too shy to tell him about it, but 2 months ago I understood that I couldn't take it anymore, so I confessed to him.

Brave and honest :bows:

He kindly rejected me, he just ended up quite painful semi-virtual and long-distance relationship with a girl, that's why he was not ready for starting it over again)

Painful

Unfortunately, we had a quarrel a month after that. I was so frustrated that I decided to stop any close communication with him and he was not very happy about that.

Well tough if he doesn't like it. Your feelings don't allow you to go on being close.

We are still communicate like half strangers and it is slowly tearing me apart. Today I asked I-ching whether he loves (as a girl, not a friend) me or not. I've got hex 22 to 27. I always find hex 22 a bit confusing, I don't know, maybe the interpretation is that I am trying to convince myself that he feels something more about me than a friendly favour, but it's wrong and he doesn't love me at all (again, in a romantic way). I also have no idea how to understand hex 27 in this case.

Well he himself did 'kindly reject' you when you confessed your love so there is that. I think you are right, you are being slowly torn apart by his lack of understanding/empathy for the fact your feelings have developed into love. He does need to respect that and realize going on as before isn't possible because of your feelings. You asked if he loves you and of course I cannot say one way or the other, he did reject you. But he may secretly very much enjoy being loved by you, he may enjoy it even subconsciously because being loved makes one buoyant, lifted, glamorous, shining as if dipped in water as line 3 describes. He may enjoy your love, bask in it, but that's not the same as properly loving you back so there is a kind of hunger or emptiness potentially behind it for him if he gets hooked on the sensation of being adored whilst merely remaining the object of desire. If this is about him then actually he may get to enjoy it and forget there's a reality here which is you aren't loving him to just give him a good time, he's going to need to realize that and when he does he may come to earth with a bump as you say well what you are saying 'this is tearing me apart, I can't do this'.

Moreover, I asked how I should behave towards him and got 42 unchanging. As far as I understood, I should forget my grievances and maintain relationship as nothing happened. I also interpret it as together we should put into life all the ideas and projects we came up with. Could you please help me with interpretation and tell me whether my understanding was right or wrong?

I think 42uc is a funny one, will link to 42uc thread in case you not seen it. I can only think you are right this does call for generosity on your part, generosity in spirit. But going on with the projects you started together ? I'm not so sure. Reading the Image here fromHilary's translation


' A noble Wisteria sees improvement, and so she changes.
When there is excess, she corrects it.'


So there is the idea of making corrections in the general direction of the good. Improving things. You did not get 40 which would be more to do with forgetting grievances, you got a more proactive answer about making improvements and making the most of opportunities to change things for the better. Also what you have aren't 'grievances' but your feelings which you had to honour. I think honouring your feeling is going with a change for improvement, for the good.


Here is the 42uc thread where I shared my own experiences with my thoughts at the time and our thoughts constantly evolve so it might not be how I'd see it now but there are some other good posts there too https://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/fri...eriences-with-Unchanging-Castings-Hexagram-42

 

[Wisteria Breeze]

But he may secretly very much enjoy being loved by you, he may enjoy it even subconsciously because being loved makes one buoyant, lifted, glamorous, shining as if dipped in water as line 3 describes. He may enjoy your love, bask in it, but that's not the same as properly loving you back so there is a kind of hunger or emptiness potentially behind it for him if he gets hooked on the sensation of being adored whilst merely remaining the object of desire. If this is about him then actually he may get to enjoy it and forget there's a reality here which is you aren't loving him to just give him a good time, he's going to need to realize that and when he does he may come to earth with a bump as you say well what you are saying 'this is tearing me apart, I can't do this'.

Hello, Trojina, thank you for your response. Actually this passsage really opened my eyes on his behaviour. Some of the words he said and some of his actions... I asked the question about love, because after our quarrel he started acting like an offfended child and was a bit jealous, that's why I was very confused, but I forget that you can be jealous even if you are not in love with someone) It makes perfect sense now. This is a painful truth, but it's more preferable than illusions which I lived in a couple months before. What I see in hex 42 unchanging is that I should be generous and kind, but I should not forget about myself, it is not like a dissolution in interests of another person, but a partnership, something like that.Thanks for your help)