Should I leave my love?

[regardie]

I've been dating a women for 7 monthes. She's older than me. Since beginning, my relationship has had many ups and downs. She's a demanding person, perhaps I was a little selfish.
I don't really see where my relatioship is going. As she said me yesterday, she needs some freedom during week, seeing me only on weekends is what she wanted, reminding me at first she didn't want any man in her life.

I really love her, I think so do her... but I'd like to live with her.

I hesitate to leave; I asked Yi what shall I do in this relationship?

my cast returned: 26 3.6. >19

many thanks for your help.

reg

 

[newlife123]

The Oracle tells you whichever path you take will lead to the same destination. You have to choose which path is most painless or efficient or if you prefer, most painful. Relationships do not start or end because we want them to. Relationships only end when the karmic debt is discharged.

 

[gene]

regardie

With respect to this reading, the first thing I notice is that lines three and six correspond, but they are both yang, so the relationship is not as well off as it should be. Then what really strikes me is the commentary on line three which says, "Thus he must acquire skill on the one hand in what will take him forward, and on the other in what will protect him against unforeseen attacks." I think the key here is "unforeseen attacks," or that which comes unexpectedly and disappoints you. For it has already happened, and is probably a harbinger for the future. If you hang on, expect a rocky road.

The sixth line is kind of tricky, because on the surface it seems positive, but to the wary and perceptive there is a bit of a warning. The commentary says, "The energy long dammed up by inhibition forces its way out and achieves great success." I get the feeling your energy is being damned up in this relationship, and you want more. As newlife says, "you will have to make a choice." Do you want more of the same? (because it is not likely to change) or do you want something more?

Gene

 

[Trojina]

The Oracle tells you whichever path you take will lead to the same destination. You have to choose which path is most painless or efficient or if you prefer, most painful. Relationships do not start or end because we want them to. Relationships only end when the karmic debt is discharged.

How does the oracle say this ? Are you able to clarify how you get your answer from the I Ching ? Is it that you think 26.6 means whichever path you choose you will reach the same destination ? I'm just wondering how you got to this interpretation.

 

[Trojina]

I've been dating a women for 7 monthes. She's older than me. Since beginning, my relationship has had many ups and downs. She's a demanding person, perhaps I was a little selfish.
I don't really see where my relatioship is going. As she said me yesterday, she needs some freedom during week, seeing me only on weekends is what she wanted, reminding me at first she didn't want any man in her life.

I really love her, I think so do her... but I'd like to live with her.

I hesitate to leave; I asked Yi what shall I do in this relationship?

my cast returned: 26 3.6. >19

many thanks for your help.

reg

If you look at the hexagrams the change lines make, change patterns, the yang pattern is 52, the yin pattern is 58. Looks to me overall right now you might feel at a standstill where she doesn't respond how you'd like, but I think the way through this may be to keep on and on communicating (hex 58).


I think you may just need a little more self restraint in what you demand from the relationship , but keep on trying for a while maybe (26.3)... There does seem to be something of value there. You can't control it (26.6) but in your shoes I think I'd hang on in there a while longer and reassess further down the road.

I imagine it is quite off putting if someone you love only wants to see you at weekends. If that went on for too long I shouldn't think it would be satisfying...but 7 months isn't long and 26 often shows a holding back. Maybe she's being cautious.

 

[newlife123]

How does the oracle say this ? Are you able to clarify how you get your answer from the I Ching ? Is it that you think 26.6 means whichever path you choose you will reach the same destination ? I'm just wondering how you got to this interpretation.

Taken from Kong Ming Shen Shou:

Lines: 160,162, 163
.
"Knowing the way of life as a river. A turtle floats, and its way is smooth. The same turtle turning upstream exhausts itself. To be one with the universe, one must find his true path and follow it"
.
"Be it yourself and never fear thus to be nude to the eyes of others. Yet realize that men so often mask themselves that what is simple is seldom fathomed. The dust of truth swirls and seeks its own chinks of entry and the falling tree in the forest without upon ears to hear makes no sound. Yet it falls. "
.
"The stream seeks its own level. It will not fight the boulder but flows around it. The boulder becomes a refuge in the stream."

 

[Trojina]

Taken from Kong Ming Shen Shou:

Line: 160,162, 163
.

What is that ?

So you mean you gave your answer with no reference to the I Ching at all ?

You said

The Oracle tells you whichever path you take will lead to the same destination.

when you say 'the oracle tells you...' I thought you meant the I Ching ? Did you not mean the I Ching ?

 

[newlife123]

It is another method of reading the I Ching created by Zhuge Liang 諸葛亮 a.k.a. Kong Ming who was considered to be the most intelligent man and the greatest astrologer of his time which was during the three kingdoms period. The 384 lines each have a corresponding analogy and is read in chronological order. It is beautiful.
.
The people who are well versed in the multiple I Ching systems often say that Kong Ming Shen Shuo gives them good results, even better than Wen Wang Gua. However, I am just a beginner so I have much to learn.

 

[Trojina]

But this isn't an astrology forum it's an I Ching forum. If you are giving people answers that have no relation to the I Ching that's recognisable you need to have a link to an explanation of what kind of I Ching you are using in the Exploring Divination section.

 

[rosada]

You've asked the I Ching what you should do in this relationship.
26.3 reads to me that you would be wise to do exactly as she asks.
26.6 suggests that it won't be long before she is willing to make more time available for you.

Best wishes,
Rosada

 

[newlife123]

But this isn't an astrology forum it's an I Ching forum. If you are giving people answers that have no relation to the I Ching that's recognisable you need to have a link to an explanation of what kind of I Ching you are using in the Exploring Divination section.

But it isn't astrology. It is another way to interpret the I Ching and has nothing to do with the stars. You should look it up. Using the single line method doesn't really tell you much if anything.

 

[Trojina]

But it isn't astrology. It is another way to interpret the I Ching and has nothing to do with the stars. You should look it up. Using the single line method doesn't really tell you much if anything.

I don't use a single line method...whatever that is.

All I'm saying is if you look in the sticky "How the I Ching Community Works" you will see it is suggested that if you are employing an unfamiliar I Ching approach you provide a explanation/description of it in Exploring Divination and put a link to it in your signature.

It says

A suggestion

If something about the way you do readings is unfamiliar to most members (eg the method, the text), please edit your signature to include a link to an explanation. (You can always write this yourself in Exploring Divination.)

If what you are referring to is another I Ching system....(but actually if it doesn't have the hexagrams and so on how is it the I Ching ?) then it is usual to give a link to it.

I took the quote from here

http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?8285-How-the-I-Ching-Community-works

 

[newlife123]

It does have the hexagrams. Just look it up it is available in Chinese. Lots of people are familiar with it.

 

[rosada]

"Lots of people are familiar with it"???? There isn't even an online English translation!

Whatever, Hilary has suggested that if we are going to post here on her site and reference a method/text people are unfamiliar with that we please edit our signature to include a link to an explanation of that method. I think it's a good suggestion but if you don't agree, it is only a suggestion.

Now can we get back to the poster's question? Thanks.
Rosada, Moderator

 

[rodaki]

It is another method of reading the I Ching created by Zhuge Liang 諸葛亮 a.k.a. Kong Ming who was considered to be the most intelligent man and the greatest astrologer of his time which was during the three kingdoms period. The 384 lines each have a corresponding analogy and is read in chronological order. It is beautiful.
.
The people who are well versed in the multiple I Ching systems often say that Kong Ming Shen Shuo gives them good results, even better than Wen Wang Gua. However, I am just a beginner so I have much to learn.

hi newlife,

this reminds me of the YiLin by Jiao Shi . . there's been talk about it in the forums before and there was a translation project going on over at LiSe's site (check here) . . From what I can tell what you are using is something similar, or along the same lines as the YiLin? If yes, I don't think it has been used in the interpretations here before and people might be a bit resistant to it - it would help if you could provide more info about it, preferably in English . .

I always found the YiLin interpretations fascinating and the texts you quoted above sound intriguing, albeit far from what we're used to, so far


ah, here's what a quick search brought up (I'm guessing you are the same 'newlife'?)
http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?11658-kongming-shenshu

about Zhuge Liang (aka KongMing)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zhuge_Liang#Literary_works
http://atouchofancientszhouyi.blogspot.gr/2012/09/friends-come-without-blame-in-yijing.html

 

[rodaki]

further search results:

LiSe has a page on it here with a link to a review by Steve Moore on Steve Marshall's site (here)

 

[Trojina]

It does have the hexagrams. Just look it up it is available in Chinese. Lots of people are familiar with it.

So it is the YiLin then ?

 

[Trojina]

oh and here is a link that actually works to Lise's work on it

http://www.yijing.nl/i_ching/yilin/index.html

well I get to that page but cannot go to the 'forest of changes ' page.

As the YiLin is still a work in progress, in translation, as far as I can see....then Newlife I wonder if it is that you are using ?

Anyway all you need to do is give a link to whatever it is in your signature. If you don't people may keep asking how you come to the conclusions you do in answering people here in SR. That certainly would not be due to childish 'resistance' as some have suggested but a wish to know what kind of I Ching you refer to. If you don't want to give a link it's up to you but already some have asked 'why are saying that' and so on.

 

[hilary]

...oh, and if there isn't a satisfactory page in English explaining the method for you to link to, then a thread in Exploring Divination to explain it would be warmly welcomed.

(Now, Rosada had a good point about getting back to the original poster's question )

 

[meng]

I've been dating a women for 7 monthes. She's older than me. Since beginning, my relationship has had many ups and downs. She's a demanding person, perhaps I was a little selfish.
I don't really see where my relatioship is going. As she said me yesterday, she needs some freedom during week, seeing me only on weekends is what she wanted, reminding me at first she didn't want any man in her life.

I really love her, I think so do her... but I'd like to live with her.

I hesitate to leave; I asked Yi what shall I do in this relationship?

my cast returned: 26 3.6. >19

many thanks for your help.

reg

Guide it and restrain it. Then release it. Like a stable riding horse, it always knows its way back to water, food and shelter. The natural way is the way.

Older women having younger sex objects is chic. I'm not saying that's what this is, but neither saying it isn't. Roles have reversed in some major ways. There's a new status quo.

Main thing is to get control of that (whatever that is to you) horse and don't let it control you.

 

[newlife123]

Yeah that's me. You can find a copy in any Chinese book store. Though I went to Chinese school every weekend growing up in LA and moved back to Hong Kong in the 90s for a few years, I really had to brush up and improve my Chinese to read and understand a lot of it. I have help from friends and family too.
.

My favorite form of fortune telling is Jyotish though. I Ching gives you a glance the present and immediate future but Jyotish tells everything that will happen in your lifespan and exactly when.

hi newlife,

this reminds me of the YiLin by Jiao Shi . . there's been talk about it in the forums before and there was a translation project going on over at LiSe's site (check here) . . From what I can tell what you are using is something similar, or along the same lines as the YiLin? If yes, I don't think it has been used in the interpretations here before and people might be a bit resistant to it - it would help if you could provide more info about it, preferably in English . .

I always found the YiLin interpretations fascinating and the texts you quoted above sound intriguing, albeit far from what we're used to, so far


ah, here's what a quick search brought up (I'm guessing you are the same 'newlife'?)
http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?11658-kongming-shenshu

about Zhuge Liang (aka KongMing)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zhuge_Liang#Literary_works
http://atouchofancientszhouyi.blogspot.gr/2012/09/friends-come-without-blame-in-yijing.html

 

[newlife123]

I've been dating a women for 7 monthes. She's older than me. Since beginning, my relationship has had many ups and downs. She's a demanding person, perhaps I was a little selfish.
I don't really see where my relatioship is going. As she said me yesterday, she needs some freedom during week, seeing me only on weekends is what she wanted, reminding me at first she didn't want any man in her life.

I really love her, I think so do her... but I'd like to live with her.

I hesitate to leave; I asked Yi what shall I do in this relationship?

my cast returned: 26 3.6. >19

many thanks for your help.

reg

OK man listen here. Seems to me you must have owed her some debt in the past life or misused her. So that is why she is unloving and using you for weekend sex. (You lucky bastard you :claps
.
So you need to go to the gym and make yourself stronger and give her the best you can. The more you can satisfy her the faster your karmic debt will be paid and then you can go on to meet the next person you owe karmic debt to.
.
Best wishes



.

 

[Trojina]

OK man listen here. Seems to me you must have owed her some debt in the past life or misused her. So that is why she is unloving and using you for weekend sex. (You lucky bastard you )
.
So you need to go to the gym and make yourself stronger and give her the best you can. The more you can satisfy her the faster your karmic debt will be paid and then you can go on to meet the next person you owe karmic debt to.
.
Best wishes

did you take this unique interpretation from 26.3 and 26.6 ?

BTW it's probably bad karma to go around telling everyone about their karmic debt.

 

[newlife123]

Looks like somebody has a bee in his I Ching bonnet.

 

[regardie]

Hello!

First of all, I thank you for all your answers. I remained in silence because I was examining each answers you gave me. I can tell you she really loves me. Despite the age difference, she loves me and so do I. The more I think of karma, the more I don't understand it. I read buddhism books, and I don't find it clear at all.
Yesterday she surprised me telling me she wanted to live with me. I have a big issue with my job here, and althoug she can't help me directly, she offered me to stay with her, spare money to buy myself a training and take a new beginning with a new job... I was really surprised...
I can tell you that when I listen to her and when I have a positive attitude to her, she is rewarding.
But I'm really afraid of her ups and down etc...

I'd like to thank you once more time for taking of your time helping me sort out this relashionship a little bit.

Have a nice sunny day.

Reg

 

[long yi]

出生时间：年　性别：男　
起卦时间：2013年06月07日04时29分
起卦农历：癸巳年四月廿九日寅时
神煞：天乙—丑未　福星—寅　日禄—寅　羊刃—卯　驿马—寅　桃花—酉　华盖—辰
干支：癸巳年　戊午月　甲辰日　丙寅时
旬空：午未　　子丑　　寅卯　　戌亥

六神　 伏神 　　　艮宫：山天大畜　　　　　　　　坤宫：地泽临
　　　　　　　　　【本　卦】　　　　　　　　　　　【变　卦】
玄武　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　官鬼丙寅木　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　子孙癸酉金　　
白虎　　　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财丙子水　应　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财癸亥水　应
滕蛇　　　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　兄弟丙戌土　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　兄弟癸丑土　　
勾陈　子孙丙申金　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟甲辰土　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　兄弟丁丑土　　
朱雀　父母丙午火　▅▅▅▅▅　官鬼甲寅木　世　　　▅▅▅▅▅　官鬼丁卯木　世
青龙　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　妻财甲子水　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　父母丁巳火　

Line 2 = you, yang line
Line 5 = her, yin line
Good arrangement is line 2 = her (wife), life 5 = you (husband)
Current arrangement is in reverse. Not Good. She is the dominant party.

Line 5 = tiger; Line 2 = bird.
You two have a disagreement.

Line 5 female zi water (empty element under house of marriage – month of reading)
Line 2 male yin wood (empty element under house of spouse – day of reading)
Two features when combined, means that you have no confidence at all that it will work.

Line 3: third party chen earth with a child line shen metal. This change line is taking several steps back. This means the third party is not interfering with what you do.

Line 6: male with the movement star and also the change line. The male is leaving, perhaps find someone younger.

Line 19.1: marriage document with si fire that conflicts with line 5 female hai water. No marriage.

The situation is not promising. I think it will all end by next February 2014. Some problem in August/September this year.

 

[regardie]

Thank you Long Yi for your accurate reading of my cast. Plum flower method rules.

Current arrangement is in reverse. Not Good. She is the dominant party.

You're right.

You two have a disagreement.

I don't know wich one, perhaps can you tell me more? Her elder daughter?

Two features when combined, means that you have no confidence at all that it will work.

Yes, I doubt it.

Line 3: third party chen earth with a child line shen metal. This change line is taking several steps back. This means the third party is not interfering with what you do.

I don't understand, what do you mean here, please?

Line 19.1: marriage document with si fire that conflicts with line 5 female hai water. No marriage.

She's still married, but fled home two years ago. There are an house between her husband that doesn't sell. Perhaps her husband will buy back her part of house?

Some problem in August/September this year.

Is this future situation that will drive to an end according to you? What kind of problem is it, if you can tell

Thank you again for your help.
Reg