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Shadowsid32
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- Joined
- Oct 6, 2013
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Hi all,
After something of a hiatus, I have returned to the I-Ching and need some help figuring out what it is trying to tell me in this situation. I am in a relatively new relationship for about the past five months and it has, for the most part, been a source of true joy and happiness in my life. I believe this to be true for him as well. The situation evolved as his former relationship was ending and when it did actually end the opportunity to take the next step together was evident. I was (and am) reticent to move too quickly and we haven't. We spend probably four nights a week together at his home, but I believe he needs the other nights to grow accustomed to being alone in the house now and to properly mourn the situation and he tends to agree with this. Again, this goes along with not moving too quickly and letting old wounds heal a little. Because he and his ex had pets together, and because his ex is unable to have pets in the new apartment and seems to be having something of a difficult time dealing with being alone, my boyfriend will occasionally have the ex over to see the pets and talk about how things are going.
As things are so new, for what I believe to be obvious reasons, I'm not entirely comfortable with the arrangement and have said so. However, he tells me that there is nothing to worry about and that, though he cares for his ex because of the time they shared together (seven years), that he has made it clear his feelings for me and that he no longer has romantic feelings for the ex. I believe it because I believe that, with the amount that he knows this is affecting me, he would tell me if there was some other motive in their meetings. In a way, though I'm uncomfortable with it, I'm also happy that he doesn't want to just abandon someone that he shared so much with, especially when the ex is hurting or having difficulty adjusting. My boyfriend has told me that he loves me and that he loves spending time with me, that he wants our relationship to grow, and I believe that too. It might be my own self-conscious nature that is getting the best of me here, and I'm trying not to be jealous or apprehensive about the ex, but it's difficult sometimes.
So, after that long explanation, the question that I asked was: what does my boyfriend want out of the relationship we are building?
The answer I got was hexagram 7.2.4 changing to hexagram 16.
My take on hexagram 7 is a desire for something orderly and strong- in this case a relationship or connection- where we are working together rather than exercising separate agendas. Line 2 I read as a warning against trying to take moral high ground or trying to inflict guilt or a sense of superiority, but to be honest and talk about the things that are bothering both of us, which we are actually pretty good at doing. Line 4 I read more as an emotional retreat or even as a discussion about the situation in which we see each other frequently through the week but with time for him to acclimate to a new life, a new relationship, and to properly mourn the past and heal from it.
Hexagram 16 I see as a very positive indication because I believe it speaks to what we both want which is a happy union built on creating that strong relationship that I believe hexagram 7 in some ways refers to.
Having said all of that, my interpretations are pretty literal and I'm pretty green when it comes to the way the I-Ching presents its wisdom so I would welcome whatever anyone else sees here.
After something of a hiatus, I have returned to the I-Ching and need some help figuring out what it is trying to tell me in this situation. I am in a relatively new relationship for about the past five months and it has, for the most part, been a source of true joy and happiness in my life. I believe this to be true for him as well. The situation evolved as his former relationship was ending and when it did actually end the opportunity to take the next step together was evident. I was (and am) reticent to move too quickly and we haven't. We spend probably four nights a week together at his home, but I believe he needs the other nights to grow accustomed to being alone in the house now and to properly mourn the situation and he tends to agree with this. Again, this goes along with not moving too quickly and letting old wounds heal a little. Because he and his ex had pets together, and because his ex is unable to have pets in the new apartment and seems to be having something of a difficult time dealing with being alone, my boyfriend will occasionally have the ex over to see the pets and talk about how things are going.
As things are so new, for what I believe to be obvious reasons, I'm not entirely comfortable with the arrangement and have said so. However, he tells me that there is nothing to worry about and that, though he cares for his ex because of the time they shared together (seven years), that he has made it clear his feelings for me and that he no longer has romantic feelings for the ex. I believe it because I believe that, with the amount that he knows this is affecting me, he would tell me if there was some other motive in their meetings. In a way, though I'm uncomfortable with it, I'm also happy that he doesn't want to just abandon someone that he shared so much with, especially when the ex is hurting or having difficulty adjusting. My boyfriend has told me that he loves me and that he loves spending time with me, that he wants our relationship to grow, and I believe that too. It might be my own self-conscious nature that is getting the best of me here, and I'm trying not to be jealous or apprehensive about the ex, but it's difficult sometimes.
So, after that long explanation, the question that I asked was: what does my boyfriend want out of the relationship we are building?
The answer I got was hexagram 7.2.4 changing to hexagram 16.
My take on hexagram 7 is a desire for something orderly and strong- in this case a relationship or connection- where we are working together rather than exercising separate agendas. Line 2 I read as a warning against trying to take moral high ground or trying to inflict guilt or a sense of superiority, but to be honest and talk about the things that are bothering both of us, which we are actually pretty good at doing. Line 4 I read more as an emotional retreat or even as a discussion about the situation in which we see each other frequently through the week but with time for him to acclimate to a new life, a new relationship, and to properly mourn the past and heal from it.
Hexagram 16 I see as a very positive indication because I believe it speaks to what we both want which is a happy union built on creating that strong relationship that I believe hexagram 7 in some ways refers to.
Having said all of that, my interpretations are pretty literal and I'm pretty green when it comes to the way the I-Ching presents its wisdom so I would welcome whatever anyone else sees here.