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Will a joy happen soon in my love life?

CheersC

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Will a joy happen SOON in my love /sexual life, Like for example meeting someone I like...? Hexagram 50.3 to 64. But, the third line seems to be speaking about obstacles (very generic) because of the rain and of the handles...I looked into old discussions, they talk about being stuck in old patterns, not sure it applies in here because i think the "obstacle" is more concrete, like not meeting many interesting people,not being in the centre of attention. Not sure though... Maybe it also mentions the fact of nobody out there being able to make me feel good (the handles). I see there would be potential though maybe after the" rain", which are the worries im carrying in my life, aka the obstacles
 

CheersC

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"Line 3 The ting handle breaks so it can’t be moved and one is impeded = the meal is not eaten, but once rain falls, remorse evaporates. Good fortune. Changes to (64) Before Completion. You are temporarily impeded from achieving your goal because the situation requires some type of mending. Even though you have something valuable to share it is not recognized immediately. However, all things change like the rain and after some difficulty you achieve your aim."
 

CheersC

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"Line 3 The ting handle breaks so it can’t be moved and one is impeded = the meal is not eaten, but once rain falls, remorse evaporates. Good fortune. Changes to (64) Before Completion. You are temporarily impeded from achieving your goal because the situation requires some type of mending. Even though you have something valuable to share it is not recognized immediately. However, all things change like the rain and after some difficulty you achieve your aim."
 

rosada

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No, not SOON, but eventually.
 

rosada

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I don’t know. After it rains? Maybe ask another question like What area of my life should I focus on now to prepare for this eventual meeting?
 

diamanda

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CheersC I agree with your interpretation and with Rosada's. There seems to be a problem somewhere. Maybe that what you've got to offer isn't getting recognised. Perhaps ask something like what do I need to change in myself so that love/sex can be possible soon?
 

CheersC

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what do I need to do or be so that love/sex can be possible soon?64.1.3 not completed TO 14 great harvestLine 1 Getting the tail in the water = humiliatingLine 3 Before completion, attack brings misfortune = it furthers one to cross the great water.I dont get it...
 

diamanda

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what do I need to do or be so that love/sex can be possible soon?
64.1.3 > 14

Don't have sex too soon (64.1). Make the process very slow, make them struggle, really struggle to get you (64.3). Be super confident and have the upper hand (14). In short, play very hard to get and considerably increase your self-confidence. This is the soonest/quickest path to it.
 

CheersC

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what do I need to do or be so that love/sex can be possible soon?64.1.3 > 14Don't have sex too soon (64.1). Make the process very slow, make them struggle, really struggle to get you (64.3). Be super confident and have the upper hand (14). In short, play very hard to get and considerably increase your self-confidence. This is the soonest/quickest path to it.
I thanked u for the interpretation but the advice is weird because it never helped rejecting a person to attract it, I mean, if normally a person doesnt even notice you, .Does this really advice to play hard to get? Hmm weird thing.. Plus, they run away or find another girl and then come back later (lol) if u only play hard to get and the confidence didnt increase... Its all my life till now i am hard to get, and nobody got me.No.. I dont know.. Are there othěr possible ideas?
 

diamanda

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it never helped rejecting a person to attract it, I mean, if normally a person doesnt even notice you
This is not what I meant, let me explain. When a woman is sexy and confident, and she's relaxed and looks welcoming - this is alluring in itself. It attracts male attention. Then, once you have the attention of someone, then it's the moment to not have sex immediately. This is the moment to really make it hard for him to get you - not by rejecting him, but by slowing him down so that you can know him better. For example, you give him lots of smiles and interesting talk, maybe even an 'accidental' stroke on his arm, but when he asks for more you sweetly say not now, maybe when we next meet. I hope you get the idea.

Imagine a girl you know who is very successful with guys - think, what attitude does she have? You need a similar highly confident manner. Hard to get doesn't mean being aloof and rejecting. It means being alluring and confident so that you don't just grasp the first male that comes around as if you're desperate. Does this make sense?
 

CheersC

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This is not what I meant, let me explain. When a woman is sexy and confident, and she's relaxed and looks welcoming - this is alluring in itself. It attracts male attention. Then, once you have the attention of someone, then it's the moment to not have sex immediately. This is the moment to really make it hard for him to get you - not by rejecting him, but by slowing him down so that you can know him better. For example, you give him lots of smiles and interesting talk, maybe even an 'accidental' stroke on his arm, but when he asks for more you sweetly say not now, maybe when we next meet. I hope you get the idea.Imagine a girl you know who is very successful with guys - think, what attitude does she have? You need a similar highly confident manner. Hard to get doesn't mean being aloof and rejecting. It means being alluring and confident so that you don't just grasp the first male that comes around as if you're desperate. Does this make sense?
Yes it does make sense now! It's what i always did without knowing that. Yes maybe it is the only (and essential) thing i need right now because lately my esteem and confidence have been getting worse (Not on the everyday area but on the ability of being noticed, which makes u question what other people are attracted to and what you are actually showing).
 

CheersC

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Diamanda, does this hexagram suggest to avoid "unappreciating" men? Because I received messages and calls by some friends, they look almost interested but then when we talk they randomly mention this or that "hot chick" and i ignore that, i change issue of talk but inside i dont want to know what their idea of attractiveness is...lol.I am now avoiding those people... I mean, we have a friend relationship but not on real friends basis,we are just acquaintances.
 

marybluesky

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Hi again CheerC! I agree with other commenters:

Will a joy happen SOON in my love /sexual life, Like for example meeting someone I like...? Hexagram 50.3 to 64.
For you the things are Slowly Evolving (50): "The Cauldron. Supreme good fortune. Success."; yet the situation Isn't Still Ripe (64) to reach your aim.

50.3: " The handle of the cauldron is altered. One is impeded in his way of life. The fat of the pheasant is not eaten. Once rain falls, remorse is spent. Good fortune comes in the end." The "handles" are altered, so there should be an obstacle in the way of communicating and showing the content of your cauldron- your capacity to love; what you can offer in the relationships- to the world. Something prevents you from reaching the desired result at this moment. Your anxieties, however, will go away as some blessing enters your life, and there will be a happy and to all that :)

What do I need to do or be so that love/sex can be possible soon?64.1.3>14
You Aren't Still There(64), as the first reading suggests too.
64.1: "He wets his tail. Humiliation." So don't rush into relationships/sex, or you'll regret it later.
64.3: " Before completion achieving success, continuing -- misfortune. It is beneficial (Sic) to cross the great water. [This line indicates frustration.] " Your frustration is understandable. Don't act before you're in the appropriate conditions; don't push the things harshly forward. Instead, tread the path to your aim slow by slow. Do the little things that improve your situation.
This way, you'll discover Great Treasures(14)- outwardly or inwardly.

All in all, seems that you should wait. There is no way to find love soon, but there is great potential for the future as is indicated in both readings.

Good luck!
 

CheersC

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Hi again CheerC! I agree with other commenters:Will a joy happen SOON in my love /sexual life, Like for example meeting someone I like...? Hexagram 50.3 to 64.For you the things are Slowly Evolving (50): "The Cauldron. Supreme good fortune. Success."; yet the situation Isn't Still Ripe (64) to reach your aim.50.3: " The handle of the cauldron is altered. One is impeded in his way of life. The fat of the pheasant is not eaten. Once rain falls, remorse is spent. Good fortune comes in the end." The "handles" are altered, so there should be an obstacle in the way of communicating and showing the content of your cauldron- your capacity to love; what you can offer in the relationships- to the world. Something prevents you from reaching the desired result at this moment. Your anxieties, however, will go away as some blessing enters your life, and there will be a happy and to all that :)What do I need to do or be so that love/sex can be possible soon?64.1.3>14You Aren't Still There(64), as the first reading suggests too.64.1: "He wets his tail. Humiliation." So don't rush into relationships/sex, or you'll regret it later.64.3: " Before completion achieving success, continuing -- misfortune. It is beneficial (Sic) to cross the great water. [This line indicates frustration.] " Your frustration is understandable. Don't act before you're in the appropriate conditions; don't push the things harshly forward. Instead, tread the path to your aim slow by slow. Do the little things that improve your situation.This way, you'll discover Great Treasures(14)- outwardly or inwardly.All in all, seems that you should wait. There is no way to find love soon, but there is great potential for the future as is indicated in both readings.Good luck!
Very well written, thank you Mary!
 

diamanda

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Diamanda, does this hexagram suggest to avoid "unappreciating" men? Because I received messages and calls by some friends, they look almost interested but then when we talk they randomly mention this or that "hot chick" and i ignore that, i change issue of talk but inside i dont want to know what their idea of attractiveness is...lol.I am now avoiding those people...
Great that you're avoiding those insidious pieces of such-and-such.
64.1 is about premature 'crossing', for example premature communication, or premature sex. And 64.3 is about really striving to make something happen, putting in real effort. The guys you're describing here (almost interested, and attempting to break your self-esteem by cunning means of mentioning other hot chicks) sound like they want something to happen quickly and prematurely, without much effort on their part. They certainly don't fufil 64.3, which shows a real effort to reach the real you. So good riddance! Believe me it's way better to be alone and work on your confidence, than to be with someone like that and be psychologically battered into a pulp.
 

rosada

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64.1.3-14:
Don’t rush and don’t worry. It’s his job to find you and he will.

Notice sleep patterns - when he gets within range you may see him in dreams.
 

marybluesky

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I agree with Diamanda. These guy suffer from a tragically low self steem, to the point that they need to destroy others in order to temporarily feel better about themselves.
The guys you're describing here (almost interested, and attempting to break your self-esteem by cunning means of mentioning other hot chicks) sound like they want something to happen quickly and prematurely, without much effort on their part. They certainly don't fufil 64.3, which shows a real effort to reach the real you. So good riddance!
Do you think that by such a behavior they intend to get something from the woman?
Notice sleep patterns - when he gets within range you may see him in dreams.
Wow!
I've seen the important guys of my life in dreams, however after having some contact when intense/deep feeling were shaped.
Do you mean the guy may appear in the dreams even before having an eye on him as a potential partner?
 

diamanda

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Do you think that by such a behavior they intend to get something from the woman?
Hi Mary, yes, I have seen that this type intends to get something from the woman. By destroying her self-esteem and her logical faculties, he turns her into an easy supply of sex as and when he might need it on a whim. Also, having her on his wall of trophies boosts his ego. Also, he enjoys seeing her in pain (emotional sadism). There could be other material advantages depending on circumstances (e.g. money, accommodation, status, etc.).
 
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CheersC

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64.1.3-14:Don’t rush and don’t worry. It’s his job to find you and he will. Notice sleep patterns - when he gets within range you may see him in dreams.
Woah, I love this thing, I pay a lot of attention to dreams. Where did you read about it? Is it line 3 or hexagram?
 

CheersC

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Great that you're avoiding those insidious pieces of such-and-such.64.1 is about premature 'crossing', for example premature communication, or premature sex. And 64.3 is about really striving to make something happen, putting in real effort. The guys you're describing here (almost interested, and attempting to break your self-esteem by cunning means of mentioning other hot chicks) sound like they want something to happen quickly and prematurely, without much effort on their part. They certainly don't fufil 64.3, which shows a real effort to reach the real you. So good riddance! Believe me it's way better to be alone and work on your confidence, than to be with someone like that and be psychologically battered into a pulp.
I am trying to answer u all one by one. Yeah I agree on the psychological technique, i have been to a party and i met other 3 people like that. I ended the evening that I was fed up but not about them who were just attracted by me and hated the fact i didnt care about them a lot, but i was fed up because of the ways other girls dressed. I could also have been "a hot chick" dressing like that but hey, i was talking to this guy (he is also in a relationship) and he kept gazing and turning his head towards a girl who had such tight pants and tshirt that...i looked at her too just to make him notice it was pointless to look at her if it wasnt a "what the hell is she wearing" look!My self esteem was battled, but i know i can do that too... I am just disappointed about tolerance on that. I got bored and after a lot of patience of not being so Quick to leave the conversation, i said "well im going" and reached other ppl. After the evening the other 2 guys who were using those annoying methods to tease me and get my attention started to become kind and to "study" me. Like, my facials, my body language, what i said and so on. I really hated that because i usaually prefer to observe ahah.Im also tired of being open to boys already. Sorry diamanda, dont even know why i mentioned this, lol, let's get back to the lines... I may also do like that chick but i feel like efforts shouldnt all come from me... I sometimes would love to put no efforts and being noticed anyways by someone i like.
 

CheersC

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I agree with Diamanda. These guy suffer from a tragically low self steem, to the point that they need to destroy others in order to temporarily feel better about themselves. Do you think that by such a behavior they intend to get something from the woman?Wow! I've seen the important guys of my life in dreams, however after having some contact when intense/deep feeling were shaped. Do you mean the guy may appear in the dreams even before having an eye on him as a potential partner?
Yup, i also dreamed about important guys i had already met
 

CheersC

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Hi Mary, yes, I have seen that this type intends to get something from the woman. By destroying her self-esteem and her logical faculties, he turns her into an easy supply of sex as and when he might need it on a whim. Also, having her on his wall of trophies boosts his ego. Also, he enjoys seeing her in pain (emotional sadism). There could be other material advantages depending on circumstances (e.g. money, accommodation, status, etc.).
I think boys are born to make girls become like that. They do it even without knowing.Women also use tricks. But the friend i have was sincere, he had an idea of sexy. I dont care though, because i dont feel sexually attracted by any of these ones. Maybe they get that and so they start acting like that for this reason.
 

CheersC

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Dreams... I used to be foretelling some things happening in my life but I usually dont foretell partners. I often dream about important guys i met as if we shared something (as marybluesky said) but for now i am not dreaming about new boys,im quite stuck thinking about the one i already knew.
 

CheersC

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Ah but also: when you want to have the right to show apathy Nd boredom because it is your natural look, it is normal, u are always like that and these boys come just to tease you on that. It is so annoying. I think one was very drunk to be arrogant to say i was lesbian.Anyways, i wanted to talk to a person but he didnt pay attention to me so i stopped. I had no physical interest, i just felt him calm and normal. He kept staying with his friends so I left... Didnt feel outraged though... If he was someone i liked i would have felt really bad about that but without behaving like the boys i mentioned. By the way, i have a question : is this hexagram saying that i dont get support and help from friends?Because actually my friends dont help me, i mean, it's good they leave me free to do what i want but not good when they defend every boy! This particular i didnt like...
 

diamanda

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i was fed up because of the ways other girls dressed. I could also have been "a hot chick" dressing like that but hey, i was talking to this guy (he is also in a relationship) and he kept gazing and turning his head towards a girl who had such tight pants and tshirt (...) Im also tired of being open to boys already (...) I sometimes would love to put no efforts and being noticed anyways by someone i like.
It's very rude to speak with someone and keep eyeing someone else. Put a red cross on him in your mind X. There are degrees of sex appeal - we don't have to dress like loose women to be sexy. We all do need to put in some effort, though.

I think boys are born to make girls become like that. They do it even without knowing.Women also use tricks.
The boys (and women) who use such tricks do it knowingly. It's not true that all boys are born to behave like this, there are decent people out there (somewhere...).

for now i am not dreaming about new boys,im quite stuck thinking about the one i already knew.
At least you do want to find someone new.

Ah but also: when you want to have the right to show apathy Nd boredom because it is your natural look, it is normal, u are always like that and these boys come just to tease you on that. It is so annoying. I think one was very drunk to be arrogant to say i was lesbian.Anyways, i wanted to talk to a person but he didnt pay attention to me so i stopped. I had no physical interest, i just felt him calm and normal. He kept staying with his friends so I left... Didnt feel outraged though... If he was someone i liked i would have felt really bad about that but without behaving like the boys i mentioned. By the way, i have a question : is this hexagram saying that i dont get support and help from friends?Because actually my friends dont help me, i mean, it's good they leave me free to do what i want but not good when they defend every boy! This particular i didnt like...
When someone comes to arrogantly tell you that you're a lesbian just because you don't look like a slut, well that's bullying. If your 'friends' defend the bullies, then they're not real friends. It's great that you were attracted, even non-romantically, to someone calm.
Your social environment sounds like a minefield, re-read what you just wrote about it and have a serious think about how to go forward with your social life. Perhaps all your answers are so negative exactly because you're currently in such a nasty social environment, in which you are being constantly put down.
 

CheersC

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It's very rude to speak with someone and keep eyeing someone else. Put a red cross on him in your mind X. There are degrees of sex appeal - we don't have to dress like loose women to be sexy. We all do need to put in some effort, though.The boys (and women) who use such tricks do it knowingly. It's not true that all boys are born to behave like this, there are decent people out there (somewhere...).At least you do want to find someone new.When someone comes to arrogantly tell you that you're a lesbian just because you don't look like a slut, well that's bullying. If your 'friends' defend the bullies, then they're not real friends. It's great that you were attracted, even non-romantically, to someone calm.Your social environment sounds like a minefield, re-read what you just wrote about it and have a serious think about how to go forward with your social life. Perhaps all your answers are so negative exactly because you're currently in such a nasty social environment, in which you are being constantly put down.
I think the same as you!! No need to read what i wrote, i know what happened, i lived the story myself xd But i think it is not depending on me that much, i mean i was quiet and calm i didnt need anyone to tease me and honestly i wouldnt want to see other girls wearing hot tight pants to be watched by ignorant guys, because it reminds me of what i dont do. These things happen and these people exist because of the " free society", it helps these situations and i cant just keep closing my eyes anymore. Im taking all of this as an experience though...of socialite. :)
 
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CheersC

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Diamanda you were prophetic when you said that friends dont do that...
 

diamanda

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I agree that it doesn't depend much on you. Bullies bully, and even if we set boundaries to stop them attacking us, they will still try to cross them over and over again. It's constant hard work to hang out with such people. When I suggested rethinking the situation, I meant it more along the lines of finding a different environment to socialise. For example, do you have any hobbies, could you join a group related to your hobbies? Having a common interest or goal (other than partying) could potentially create a much better social environment for you. Just an idea. Of course as you say this is an experience, sure, but you don't have to remain stuck in it, you're a free person.
What happened with your friends?
 

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