What does he feel romantically for me?

[Lau_L_]

Hello, this is my first time posting here! The person I felt in my heart to be the love of my life is such a difficult commitment phobic that I've started losing faith. He loves me, deeply, I know that, but he seems to not see it (like in the movies). We met about 3 years ago on tinder, when he was visiting my city on a business trip. the connection was immediate and we did get along so well... we even kept in touch and sent each other's birthday and Xmass gifts. Suddenly he disappeared, and I was so sure I would see him again and we were meant to be, I just focused on seeing him again, and it did happen, I got a great opportunity to move to a the city he's most in love with in the world, and we met again, about 2 years ago, when he confessed he was, literally his words, "kind of with someone". It was such a bitter-sweet moment, for both of us, then he asked me to come celebrate his birthday with his friends, he organized a birthday party, and moved everything just so I could go. it was amazing and weird, and we were able to talk about our feelings after that, when he denied them and I called him out on his BS. He then, left the country to live for 4 months with his "kind of" a partner, but it did end because he did not felt super connected to her. He came back, we were together for 2 days and he left to disappear. When he came back again I was with someone, I had tried to let go and when he showed up again it was so strong I got super sick. then, he came back to the city and we talked, he first had the intention to date me, then it was friendship "dates" (english is my second language, so for me date is date, no friendship including), but he was in the city just for a few days and then we ended up just seeing each other twice, right after he arrived, and all the way before he left, when he confessed me he was "seeing someone". It broke my heart and also allowed me to let him go, which I feel he felt because it was like magic, he was all over me then... hating on my new bf, without being straight forward about it. I had to leave the country, because it was not legal for me to remain, I went to Barcelona to scape from reality and he knew it, so he came to visit me. he moved all his schedule to make it, and when he arrived he gave me the way to stay longer and be able to avoid reality longer. I was still with my boyfriend so nothing sexual happened, but then my boyfriend broke up with me. When I arrived to my home country, he came after me, excusing himself on our friendship. We ended up talking a lot, with him saying how happy he was when he talked to me and that he did not need to have sex, though he liked me, because there was no one else in the wolrd he could felt such a strong connection just by cuddling with. when he left we both cried a lot, and it was just like open possibilities were after my eyes. When we talked about it, he said he felt like we had broken up in the airport, and he just wasn't in love with me or ready for a relationship.It always makes me wander what am I doing wrong, because I ching seems to agree with me on the fact that he is duper strong connected to me in many ways. my exboyfriend and I got back together, but it felt so weird and I always felt like I was never enough (both cases in deed). the thing is, exboyfriend confessed he broke up with me bc he wanted to date someone more suitable for him (he's a "scientist", I'm an artist and he has always thought less of me) but he realized how much he loved me. XX is always there for me in the weirdest ways, but never there for actually being a partner or trying to have a relationship with me. This week, my exboyfriend and I broke up again, due to our belief of me never being able to go back to where he is on my own. then XX showed up, and since today's is his birthday, we had a long skype call. I just cannot help but asking Yi what does he feel romantically for me? and the answer was 51.4.5.6 to 42. This leads me to think he is shocked he's feelings are always growing up. but I'm not sure about my interpretation, I feel it is what I want it to be, rather than necessary what Yi is saying. So, then I asked what should I do in regards to my relationship with XX? (I also asked about my ex, but it seems like everything there is doomed) and Yi ansered qith 43.1.2.3 to 45, which is SO confusing. So I asked, what can I do so he wants to be officially my partner and it said 56.3.4.6 to 2, which I intepret like burning the bridges to be able to allow what ever comes... well, I needed more details, so I asked How can I get him to accept he is in love with me and want to be my partner, to which Yi said 51 again. So I think I truly need to understand what this 51.4.5.6 to 42 means, in order to understand the rest of it. If anyone can shade a light here it will be deeply appreciated.

 

[marybluesky]

Hello Lau L!

What does he feel romantically for me? 51.4.5.6 to 42

51 is Shock. Sounds like he feels "shocked", stunned, intensely attracted every time he meets you. And the relating hexagram- 42; Increase- shows him being increasingly "shocked" as your relationship has evolved.

51.4: "Thunder is followed by mud." He is confused because of his feelings' intensity ...

51.5: "Thunder going back and forth brings danger. No great loss. Something remains to be achieved." The intensity shakes him again and again. Although the path seems dangerous (because he is afraid of his own emotions? commitment?), nothing is lost; and he keeps on thinking about you. Maybe planning something...

51.6: "Thunder causes trembling and frightened looks. Undertaking -- misfortune. It will not threaten your own body, but it might your neighbor. No blame. There will be gossip about marriage." He feels uneasy, and is averse to move the relationship to the next level. I'm not sure who the neighbor is- you? the guy? a third party? Anyway, someone is to suffer more in the situation. "The gossip about the marriage" could mean he thinks about marrying you or someone else; or that he thinks the marriage will be controversial.

Good Luck!